Ren: (lands on broomstick) Heloooo all! Tis my first fanfics, and its my favourite couple at the moment. Seto and Joey! Expect Puppyshippping galore! I'm your author extraordinaire, Ren-sama. Bow before me mere mortals!

Winfred: (hits Ren on head) Stop referring to yourself like that. (turns around) Hello I am Winfred, Ren's more sensible side. I deal with character development, the plot line, relationship development, and grammar. Though on the latter I am not too confident in. Anyway (bows and pushes Ren down too) It nice too meet you.

Ren: You forgot about Tiger you boring old stick!

Winfred: (Pales) She's here?

Ren: Yep, she's gonna appear at the end. So for now readers enjoy! :3


Ya know what's a pain in the ass?

Well, any takers?

No, no one?

I'll tell ya then.

Seto. Freakin. KAIBA!

That stuck up, selfish, big coat wearin bastard! I tall ya what, I'd like to shove that stupid thing up were the sun don't shine. Prancing around Domino in that stupid coat, actin as if he owns the damn place. I mean come on, the thing looks like a mutated tent!

Damn just thinkin about him makes my blood boil! But it ain't just that stinking attitude of his that bothers me. In fact I wouldn't mind if he carried on prancing and just ignored me, hell I wouldn't mind if he straight out acted as if I didn't exist. But he doesn't. The stupid prick has to pick a fight with me. He just has to wind me up so tight that I explode like a freakin firecracker.

And then I get the stick for it!

Since when is that right? There's a whiff of somethin bad around dat, specially since everyone knew it was Kaiba's fault. It's always his damn fault, I don't go around trying to pick a fight. Well… not mostly. But hey he started it! With all the freakin dog comments and that stupid 'I'm all superior act'.

Oh yeah, I'd love to get my hands on him and his mutated tent coat. Only thing is I can't. Cause I'm in another, freaking detention. Oh and guess whose fault that is? You get one shot. That's right, it's Mr. Moneybags himself.

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.

I growled under my breath, thumping my head against the desk. Mrs Fuko looked up sharply.

"Mr Wheeler you've already caused enough trouble today as it is. So, unless you wish to spend another night in my company I suggest you be quiet." She said, icily.

I looked up at her through my hair, and recoiled. She had that look, that 'make one more sound and your dead' look. I knew it well. Hell I saw it in my sleep. The woman was down right scary. She was middle aged, had neat brown hair pulled into a bun, and wore glasses. Those only made her freaky blue eyes bigger. They were really light blue, icy. Just like another jack ass I know.

"Sorry miss." I mumbled.

She raised an eyebrow, and then began reading her book again. It was some sappy romance by the looks of it, called 'Under the Mistletoe'. Anyone got a barth bag? Jeez how people read that crap is beyond me. Where's the excitement? No guns, no fighting, not even a drop of blood! Usually anyway.

I glanced at the clock, which seemed to tick away with agonizingly slow movements. Thirty minutes to go, with nothin to do but think. And wanna know what I can't get out of my head?

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.

Him and that smug smirk as Mrs Fuko swung the axe down on my neck with a single word.

Detention.

Of course the mutated tent wearer didn't get detention, heck Mrs Fuko didn't even look at him. It didn't matter he bumped into me in the halls, it didn't matter he didn't apologise, and it didn't matter he called me a mutt with no sense of direction. No, all that mattered was that Joey Wheeler, a known slacker and delinquent, had his fist curled up and ready to go. I wasn't even going to hit him, swear it! I would have calmed down… eventually.

I sighed, tracing the doodles etched onto my desk. This was gonna be one long detention.


Half an hour later

"Right Mr Wheeler you're free to go." Mrs Fuko announced dismissively.

I jerked, snapping out of my half asleep state. Mrs Fuko was already packing up ready to go home, and I wasn't about to wait for her. I wiped the drool from my mouth with the back of my hand, and got to my feet in a hurry. The tight chains of detention floated away, and I felt as though I were walking on air.

"Well I don't wanna keep ya miss, see ya." I said, making a beeline for the door.

I was more then a little bit eager to escape. To hell with it, I was ecstatic to leave that drab, ole classroom behind.

"Oh wait Joseph, your..." I heard Mrs Fuko call.

I raised a hand in farewell, aware of the big, stupid grin on my face. "See ya tomorrow." I replied, and then escaped as fast as I could without running.

I surged down the corridor, feelin lighter and lighter with each step. Notice boards were strewn all over the whitewashed walls, pinned with colourful posters and leaflets. Classrooms lined with rows of desks and chairs slipped by me, each one withholding a memory of some old, boring lesson.

I turned the corner, eyes closed and humming. As soon as I escaped the school, I'd go over to Yugi's, spend some time with the gang. Tristan had been bendin my ear all day about this awesome movie he'd found. Maybe if I were lucky they hadn't gotten too far into it yet. After all my luck had been crap all day, so I had to get a little bit of good luck sometime right?

Wrong.

I barged into something solid.

My eyes flew open as I stumbled back, one hand shooting out to grip the wall instinctually.

"What th…" I stopped, looked up, and met deep blue eyes.

There was someone standing in front of me.

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.

Why does life hate me?

"Watch where you're going mutt, or else they'll put you on a lead." He said, completely devoid of emotion.

I gritted my teeth, my fingers already curling one by one. "What'd you say rich boy?" I growled.

Kaiba smirked coldly, some weird, sadistic light dancing in his eyes. "Barking back at your master, what a bad mutt."

I took a step forward, anger coursing through my veins. "I ain't no dog you bloody prick!"

"Oh? You certainly sound like one." He retorted, harshly.

Still smirking, Kaiba walked past me. He was out of his uniform, back in that bloody mutated tent again, equipped with KaibaCorp belt and suitcase. His brown hair was combed and arranged neatly, and his black boots made a clipping sound on the floor.

"By the way Wheeler, if you insist on insulting someone, you might want to avoid insults that remind me I'm rich." He said, not looking around.

It took every ounce of my self control not to turn around, run at him, and kick his sorry ass all the way to New England. But somehow I managed it, taking deep breaths and stomping all the way to the main entrance, images of Kaiba being thrown from a building running through my head like a cartoon.

"Stupid, stuck up, tent wearin prick." I muttered.

If I hadn't been sure before, I was sure as hell now. I hated, hated Kaiba.

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.


I shoved my hands in my pockets, whistling the theme tune to Trigun. Man I love that show. Guns, fights, blood, and one hell of a funny main character. Waaaay better then some sappy love story. Which reminded me, I still had Tristan's copy of Getbackers in my bag. It'd been a good read, and as soon as I gave it back I was gonna ask for volume two. My hand slipped down to my side, searching for my school satchel. Instead I grasped air.

I blinked.

I looked down, expecting to see the worn, black, leather satchel. Instead I saw thin air. Where was…?

I slapped my forehead.

In my hurry to get outta that damn classroom I'd left the bloody thing behind! The stuff in there wasn't real important, just Tristan's manga and some homework. But my keys and phone were in there too. I stopped walking, turned around, and banged my head into the nearest lamppost.

How could this day get any worse?

My hands shot up above my head, expecting a down pour of rain like in the movies. But it seemed the sky was feelin generous today, cause I remained dry. Dry and bag-less. I sighed, feelin the cool metal against my skin. I couldn't stay ere all day, I had to go back sooner or later. I stood, glarin at the silver lamppost. I felt bad bout that, since it wasn't its fault. So I patted it, and then turned back around, heading back to the prison called school.

God life really has it in for me don't it?


"What do ya mean ya gave it to Kaiba?" I yelled.

Mrs Fuko gave me a pointed look, pushing her glasses further up her pointed nose. "Exactly what it sounds like Mr. Wheeler, since you raced out of the classroom before I had a chance to tell you, I asked Mr Kaiba to see to getting it back to you." She replied.

I stared, open mouthed, dumbfounded. "B-but Kaiba?" was all I could manage.

Mrs Fuko sighed, glancing at her watch. Apparently she had better things to do then listen to some D grade average student stutter over a bag. "Yes Mr. Wheeler, Kaiba. He wasn't exactly happy about it, but I insisted. Now if you desperately need your bag I suggest you find him, I have an appointment to keep." And with that she left, heels clicking purposely down the pavement.

I watched her climb into her red Honda Civic, check her appearance in the mirror, and then drive out of the school car park. I bet she has a date with some accountant or librarian or somethin.

"Feel sorry for the poor git." I grumbled.

I ran a hand through my hair, blowing at my blonde fringe. Apparently the equivalent to rain is giving my bag to the biggest prick in town. How fate justifies that one I'll never know. Now I had two options.

One; spend the night on the streets. (Couldn't go home since dad would have a cow if I told him I lost me bag)

Two; Go visit Kaiba.

It was a close call, since both of em sounded as bad as the other. But in the end I decided I'd like a bed tonight.

Life sucks.


And now I found myself walking down one of the richest streets in Domino, the houses gettin fewer and fewer the further I went. All around me houses lined the street, they were the huge kind with big double doors and expensive windows. Hell their sheds put my house to shame. Stickin rich people.

Perfectly trimmed bushes ran along my left and right, actin as a barrier to keep out the riffraff. Like me. Man I felt out of place here. It felt like I should be wearin a top hat and carryin a cane in a gloved hand. I snorted. Me… in a suit? No way in hell my friend.

Eventually the houses disappeared altogether, and I felt like I was in the middle of no where. The road was deserted, eerily quiet. Perfect setting for a horror movie if ya ask me. Up a head I spotted a flash of gold, sparkling like a gem in the light. It turned out to be a pair of huge, metal gates, towering like soldiers in the air. And there in the centre of the gates, woven with metal, were the letters K and C.

KaibaCorp.

I stopped under the immense gates, starin up at those letters as though I were in a trance. There wasn't a house behind the gates, I realized. Just a lane, leading up and up. The place must be huge, at least four football pitches big.

I scowled. This place didn't put my house to shame, it made it look like a piece of crap. Stinkin rich people.

There was an intercom imbedded in the brick wall. Hesitantly I pushed it.

"State your name and business please." A voice asked.

It was brisk and robotic, and instantly made me stand to attention as though I were in the army.

"Er I'm Joey Wheeler and I'm ere to get ma bag, teach told me Kaiba… picked it up." I replied, feelin more awkward then a nun in a brothel.

There was a pause. "Mr. Kaiba is busy at the moment, if you would kindly wa-…"

Someone interrupted the robotic voice, someone I recognised. "Cut it out Kaname, hey Joey!" Mokuba greeted me.

I cracked a grin. "Hey squirt, how ya doin?"

"I'm fine, little bored maybe but now you're here so that's a problem solved." He replied cheerily.

I laughed. "Glad to be of service."

"Sorry about Kaname, Seto told him to keep everyone out today. What did you come by for?"

I rubbed my nose, completely relaxed now that uptight voice was gone. "Mrs Fuko said Kaiba picked up ma bag, so I came to get it. My keys are in there."

"Oh so that was what Seto threw at the maid, I was wondering what ticked him off."

My eye twitched. The mutated tent wearer was throwin my stuff around was he? I'd remember that. "Think I could come in and get it?" I asked, keeping my voice neutral.

"Sure just a second, I'll meet you at the front door kay?"

"Sure thing squirt."

Then the intercom clicked off, and the KaibaCorp gates swung open.


I whistled.

The house, no the mansion was massive. Beyond massive. It was… was… unbelievable. It looked old and western, probably Victorian, English. (I think so anyway, I'm pretty sure Mrs. Fuko talked about the Victorian period once, she had pictures and everything) The walls were red brick, and two white pillars stood on either side of the oak doors. About fifty windows were dotted about the front of the house, (there were at least four floors) and that was just the front of the house. God knows how big the rest of it was.

Suddenly the door opened. "Hey Joey!" Mokuba called.

How the kid managed to get the thing open was beyond me, it looked heavier then a block o' concrete.

"Hey there Mokuba." I replied, grinning broadly.

Mokuba smiled up at me, eyes twinkling like sapphires. His hair was a big mass of raven locks, stickin up in all directions. He was wearin the same outfit he always wore, jeans, stripy tee, and that yellow jacket. The kid could be a bloody lighthouse with a getup that bright.

"Come on in, I think your bag is in the cupboard somewhere." Mokuba said, pulling the door wider to let me in.

"Thanks kid." I replied, slipping my shoes off.

I looked up, unsurprisingly the inside of the place was just as impressive as the outside. It was Victorian too, with deep wooden furnishings with dark red accents here and there. I was in a foyer of sorts, with a cool marble floor. It was bigger then my entire flat, with doors leading off to the right and left, and a huge sweeping staircase leading up to the first floor. Beside that was a grandfather clock, with a brass pendulum swinging back and forth. It was huge.

I heard a giggle, and turned to Mokuba. "You like?" he asked, slyly.

I raised an eyebrow. "Like? This place is huge!" I exclaimed.

Mokuba laughed, and then looked around proudly. "Yeah, this home." he said.

We both took a moment to look around. I stared up at the ceiling, which was hung with a crystal chandelier. No surprise there, I'd even bet a buck there was a suit of armour somewhere in this place. I glanced at Mokuba, who was still starin around deep in thought.

"Hey squirt, ya gonna show me where ma bag is?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow.

He blinked. "Oh yeah, give me a sec." he said, dashing off to one of the doors.

He yanked it open and raced inside. From the looks of it, it was a coat cupboard. And a big one at' dat. I heard the little guy rummaging through stuff, and then exclaim;

"Found it!"

He came back out, my bag in tow. I cracked a smile, holdin out ma hand. "Thanks squirt." I said.

Just as I was about to take it though, Mokuba jerked it back. I frowned at him, and noticed for the first time that mischievous grin on his face. Somethin didn't smell right.

"What gives kid?" I asked.

His grin grew if that were possible. "Well I never said it'd be free." He replied.

I crossed my arms, and tilted ma head. "Figures, what do ya want squirt?" I asked.

Mokuba laughed. "Play some video games with me, I told you I was bored." He chuckled.

I smiled. "Ya call that a price? Hell that sounds like a reward squirt!"

"Good, then let's go to the game room. Do you like Halo?"

My smile turned into a full blown grin. "Do I ever! But I warn ya, I'll kick ya ass kid."

Mokuba just laughed confidently, and led me to a door still swinging ma bag. Maybe this day wouldn't be so bad after all.

Then again, maybe not.

Just as Mokuba went to turn the handle, a door to my left opened. It pulled back, to reveal the worlds biggest pain in the ass.

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.

"Mokuba did Kaname aler…" he stopped, having spotted me. His already hard face immediately took on a harsher, colder look. "What is that thing doing here?" he spat.

Anger boiled hot and fast, ma fist curled and I took a step forward to retort. Mokuba beat me to it though.

"Hey Seto, Joey came to pick up his bag, but I asked him to play some video games with me." he said, pleasantly.

Kaiba shot me a cool look. Talk about a drop in temperature, I wouldn't be surprised if icicles formed on ma fingertips.

"You shouldn't invite stray dogs into the house Mokuba, they start coming back." Kaiba said.

My right eye twitched for the second time today. "Listen rich boy the only reason I'm ere in the first place is because you took my bag." I said, hotly.

Kaiba just looked smug. "Think before you bark dog. Your own stupidity led you to leave your bag behind. I was merely forced to make up for it."

I took another step forwards, fingers inching to wrap around his skinny neck. "And whose damn fault is it I was in detention in the first place Kaiba?" I hissed.

"Hey guys come on, don't fight." Mokuba said, looking between us.

His words didn't even register in my mind, and not in Kaiba's either.

"I fail to see how any punishment of yours involves me Wheeler." Kaiba replied, coldly.

Mokuba tugged on his sleeve. "Seto pleas…"

I growled. "Ya were the one who started the damn fight!"

"Joey, come on just leav…"

Kaiba snorted. "I had nothing to do with it." He dismissed.

"Guys…"

I raised my fist, eyes narrowed and blood pumping. "Ya wanna take this outside moneybags?"

"And why would I do that mutt? This is my mansion, I could just throw you out."

"Guys!"

"Aww what's the matter, rich boy scared?"

"Guys!"

"Please a flee bitten mutt like you could never hope to stand a chance against me."

"Guys!"

"Wanna test that theory prick?"

"Like I said, you wouldn't stand a chance, and besides I have better things to do then play with a mongrel."

"Why you…"

Click.

I blinked. Kaiba blinked. We both looked down. There was somethin around our wrists, something… silver. We both jerked our heads up to look at Mokuba. He was standin there with a glare on his face, twirlin something on his finger. Somethin that looked suspiciously like a key. I looked down at ma wrist again.

It was handcuffs.

"You done now, or are you gonna rip each others throats out? You two are terrible!" Mokuba scolded.

"Mokuba…" Kaiba began, sounding dangerously pissed.

The squirt just kept on glarin. Wheeling in my temper I took a step toward the kid, plastering a smile on my face.

"Come on kid jokes over, unlock these things." I said.

Mokuba shook his head, and then smirked a strange little smirk. "No you two need to learn to get along, and besides," he opened the door behind him. "I said I wanted to play, so let's play hide and seek!"

Then he dashed through the door.

"Hey!" I shouted.

"Mokuba!" Kaiba called.

We dashed after him, Kaiba in the front. Dumb jerk yanked me through the door frame. We were in a play room with three doors, strewn with colourful beanbags and toys.

It was empty, Mokuba was gone.

And I was left, handcuffed to Kaiba.

Seto. Freakin. Kaiba.

Life doesn't just dislike me. It freakin loathes me.


Tiger: (Creeps up on Winfred) … Boo

Winfred: (jumps) Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

Tiger: (collapses laughing) Oh Winfred, ya plonka. (Turns around) I'm Tiger, Ren's fangurl side. I make up all the crazy stuff that happens to Kaiba and Joey. Hehehehe the' andcuffs were ma idea.

Winfred: She's crazy.

Ren: (Ren and Tiger grab an arm of Winfred's each) Come Winfred, come.

Tiger: (eyes flash) Yeah, come' wit us.

Ren: But before we go, I hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Tiger: If ya did drop a review.

All three: Bye for now!