Rick gave a quick run down on how he escaped the white house in the garage. He was tuning some kind of reciever while the garage door was half open. Morty was still in his pyjamas having just woken up.
"... so I didn't move and inch since I had a knife at my neck, unaware that I could see them, they still use pretty bad cave-rick technology"
"woah rick! how'd they do that?" asked Morty, cheerfully.
"invisibility cloakscloaks, j-j-just like the ones you see in harry potter, they bend light around an object, giving the appearance that it isn't there at all" Rick waved his arms in the air trying to replicate the motion of light bending.
"well... how did you manage to see them?"
"It's complicated mind stuff, Morty. Like how you could turn into a car, you can see the unknown"
Morty stared, not feeling complete with his answer.
Rick's eyelids lower, "Just kidding it's the lenses", he hands out a small liquid container from his lab coat that had a pair of odd contact lenses, "when you wear these lenses, i-it's like a whole new world out there, weird stuff lurking in the shadows that you'd never know existed, due to this other dimension overlapping ours"
Morty's eyes gleamed with curiosity "Can I try them?"
"No kid. Nobody (burps) wants to know that there are slightly intelligent creatures spying on you while you shower. It get's weirder at night buddy"
"Oh please Rick. I-I-I gotta try. I mean, you take me on adventures and stuff, I've seen people die! I-I-I'm pretty sure I'll get used to it!"
Rick paused.
"Ugh... fine", he hands over the container to Morty and resumes work. Knowing it's consequences.
Beth perpared breakfast, Summer and Jerry already at the table. Summer, texting as usual, in between the clinking sounds of the utensils in the kitchen, they heard Morty give an ear-ripping scream. Immediately after his footsteps were heard running across to the stairs and down to the garage in his underwear. The three of them watched, obviously something to do with Rick.
"Whadya want now, Jerry?" he scorned at the table knowing that all eyes were on him.
"My. Son. Was. Scared. Of. Something... ", Jerry's face read contempt and confusion. They were going to talk about Morty's grades and how they want to stop seeing him going on adventures. Rick foresaw it. Beth's eyebrows got closer as she hoped that there wouldn't be a heated argument. She had just gotten back with Jerry, and she wished they'd get along. Layers of stress weighed on her shoulders.
"We've had this conversation before. He's seen worse things. Like your relationship with my daughter. He'll be fine"
Meanwhile, Morty faced towards the corner of the garage, shivering, mumbling to himself.
"so... that's... the...", he stopped there, unable to form words.
The matriarch of the family peered into the mirror, worrying about balancing her family again, and her job, Jerry coming back, etc. as usual. She's reached a day's limit of emotional labour. The door was left open and Summer hopped by.
"Hey mom I'm gonna go volunteer, byeeee..."
Summer noticed deep lines on her mother's forehead through the mirror.
"Oh, you're stressed out, like always", Summer leaned to the frame of the door, sipping the last pint of energy drink. She was in a mascot costume that looked like a cow.
Beth turned to Summer and didn't reply, although she had something at the tip of her tounge.
"jeez you really need a break or something. Like, try a spa, or a vacation, or-"
"Summer, what does running... how does it help you?"
"I think you're tryna ask me if it takes MY mind of things, yea totally! I even forget that I doing it because I might get fat Hah Haa haaah"
*Beth snorts* "You look Like a coW"
"MOM! ARE YOU SAYING I'M FAT?"
Uh-oh.
"NO No honey! You're literally dressed up as-"
Summer runs into her room crying, she enacts her classic "slam the door".
xxxx
Beth goes outside for a run, already quite far from her house. Her white ear phones plugged in, she was on a quiet, sunny street, with very few people walking by. The muscles on her forehead began to relax.
Hey, this reeeally is helping me out! I didn't think about my family for a while now, and I feel better. I know none of this is my fault, well, except for the fact I had unprotected sex, but, who even discovered sex? who thought it was a good idea to stick your wand in the sorting hat? I hoped something good would happen out of this but now I just hope something funny happens out of this-
Beth broke out of her space. She found herself a dead end. Nothing but a typical alleyway brought to a close, flat buildings towering at the sides of her, a dumpster at the side with garbage dumped both in and outside of it. The space seemed to receive sunlight only during noon when the sun was directly over head. Overall it didn't smell pleasant.
She prepared to turn back, until a shadow swept above her. She looked up to find nothing except a note book falling from the sky. She knew she wasn't seeing things. There was definetly a presence that flew above her, but what gave her chills was the mysterious notebook, lying there. She looked throughout while walking to get a closer look at the book and found no windows of the buliding open for someone to throw it from.
It definetly fell from the sky, something dropped it here.
She felt as though she was being watched.
She picked up the book. Before she got a good look at it, a surge of wind rushed over her. It didn't feel like any ordinary wind. It felt forced.
Nothing was present. Just her, the book and the alley.
The notebook was black, with the word "deathnote" on the cover as if it was scrawled by a 4 year old. She reads the contents.
Blank pages.
It looked ancient. She could make out white letters on the inside of the cover, "rules of the deathnote".
With that she read the first sentence:
The human whose name is written in this note... shall die.
"Oh jeez. I hope Rick has nothing to do with this".
" D..." a voice spoke.
Beth jumped. She flipped and saw a huge figure behind her. She'd seen weird looking aliens before. It only startled her and let out a whimper to know that someone was breathing over her neck the entire time.
"JESUS CHRIST! WERE YOU FOLLOWING ME?!"
"How interesting... Aren't you surprised to see me?"
Beth frowned, ready to burst, "wha- afraid? I've been dealing with Rick's aliens for waaay too long to be scared of some goth chick who's inspired by jack The ripper fanfic. Do you even clear your throat?"
He let's out a rough, coarse chuckle, "You are Beth, I'm guessing you are closely related to this Rick"
"oh so you don't know Rick? Weird, How'd you catch my name?" she gives it an unpleasant guise, ready to call it a stalker.
"Simple. It's written on right above your head"
Beth looks up as if she could see her temples and runs her hands across her forehead.
"uh... You can't see it"
She paused, and crossed her arms in distrust. She wanted to leave, but that thing is blocking the way.
"Okay... what do you want?"
"Pardon me, let me introduce myself. I'm Ryuk, a shinigami, you'd know the meaning of that word if you're a weeb. That used to be my notebook, and by now you must realize that thing you're holding in your hand is not ordinary".
"A shee-ni-gaa-mee", Beth expanded. Her muscles relaxed and she cocked an eyebrow, "huh. So what does this book do? Actually kill people?"
"yup" stressing on the 'p', "the Death Note becomes part of the human world once it touches their soil. In other words," Ryuk points his long finger at her, "this note book is all yours".
Beth doesn't reply, she merely glanced at the notebook and back at the shinigami.
"be warned, a human who has used the Death Note neither goes to heaven or hell, guess you've something to look forward to" he let's out a coarse chuckle again.
"wow you shinigamis have a shitty sense of humor too".
Xxxx
"Morty, Morty listen" Rick Sanchez pulls his grandson aggressively from the corner of the garage. Morty clutches Rick's lab coat and doesn't intend to let go. He was trembling and his voice cracked like he was about to cry.
"oh Rick! What was that? It's those things that-t-t-talk to me during sleep paralysissss...!".
Rick went down on one knee and his hand taking a firm grip on his grandson's shoulder, "Morty those things can't hurt you unless you show fear. They CRAVE negative energy. They're like pussies when you don't give into their demands".
Morty calmed a bit, still shivering and his eyes kept darting around.
"...How long were those things in here?"
"They lurk everywhere Morty, you don't wanna see the stuff they do when the sun goes down"
Seeing Morty began to stabilize and his grip on the lab coat loosen, Rick resumed his work.
"well what do they do at night?"
"they have massive orgies. That shits nasty"
Morty wasnt satisfied with that answer. Rick isn't someone who'd bother with what's nasty.
X
xxxxx
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" Morty screeched like nails on a chalkboard.
"It appears that I don't remember if you two have touched the notebook. Tell me, how are you two able to see me?"
"Oh I've touched the notebook, thats the last Nicolas Sparks book I'll ever read, I gave the movie 3 stars on rotten tomatoes"
"I'm not talking about that notebook", he points at the book in Beth's hand, "that one".
"oh it's a Death Note" Rick crossed his arms, unsurprised, "That movie was terrible too. Your light bending tricks aren't gonna work one buddy, I can see you, Morty can see you-"
Rick looked at Morty at the mention of his name.
"RICK! it's a death god from that show we watched on alternate reality TV"
"alternate reality TV? I'm surprised. Humans really have already advanced that far..."
"I'm surprised you weren't beaten up by those fourth dimensional police officers, considering how poorly you hide yourselves. Whadaya want with my family anyways?".
It let out a throaty laugh, "Excuse me, but I'll haven't introduced myself. I'm a shinigami, an extra dimensional being. As you see, that notebook used to be mine, but now it belongs to her-"
"okay thanks now the the fuck out" Rick attempts to push Ryuk out of the door, but his hands sink into it and he falls right through.
"I don't think you understand, I don't need food or any of that sort. You can pretend I do not exist, I'm just here to assist your daughter, besides, she's already written a name"
"Wait WHAT? Mom is that true?"
"I just wanted to see what would happen..."
"Woah Beth I hope it's Jerry's" sneered Rick.
"what? no"
"who's name did you write mom?"
She clenched her teeth "I'm not... telling..."
Mandela
Like any regular person she felt it was a sham at first. But there's probably a TV series that's being run about her family in another universe, she had to give in. She tried out her second name, and it worked. Somehow, not the first one.
Maybe it was like an old depreciated machine that needed time to start up.
Beth was seated on her bed, she leaned back against the pillows and the headboard. The blanket was still under her as she tapped the screen of the ipad. She didn't seem to want to get comfortable.
She heard Rick rebuke in the living room, "WHAT DO THEY MEAN KIM KARDASHIAN'S DEAD?! THIS IS THE ONLY SHOW IN THIS REALITY YOU CAN WATCH WITH YOUR BRAIN SWITCHED OFF".
She could almost feel Morty sitting next to her father on the couch, staring at the TV squirming and shocked.
"THEY CAN'T JUST KILL OFF THE MAIN CHARACTER TO END A SHOW"
So this book really does kill people. Beth thought, it put her doubts to rest.
But why can't I kill him?
The youtube video of a celebrity replayed, "He does not exist" the man said, Beth rubbed her thumb under her chin as she tried to get to the bottom of this mystery. She switched to a new tab and headed to twitter, something bothered her about having too many apps on her screen that she strictly prefered the internet browser.
The celebrity recently tweeted. "My soul is not contained within the limits of my body. My body is contained within the limitlessness of my soul", with an illustration below.
The timing, 3hrs. She wrote his name nearly 4 hours ago and a part of her was still relieved that he may still be alive. She adored this personality and felt guilty for scrawling his name in that notebook.
Ryuk laughed.
She broke her gaze from the tablet to the black figure.
"What's funny?" she asked.
"Either you spelt his name wrong or he really does not exist as he says. He might also be dead and someone else runs his twitter account", he moved towards her bed and reclined on Jerry's side of the bed. Beth remained bewildered, he could have possibly died many years ago and it was never reported in the news, or perhaps even changed his name.
"Let me remind you that the deathnote never misses the victim", Ryuk added.
Morty lightly pushed to door open and stood there, looking at his mother. "Mom...".
Beth felt spooked. He sounded like a ghost. "did you just kill Kim Kardashian?"
Oh no. Morty kept up with the Kardashians, she forgot about it because he was ashamed to admit it and therefore kept it a secret, only recently coming out of the closet, yet spoke almost nothing about it.
Morty marked a plain look. Knowing how insecure Morty can be, Beth wanted to assure him that she didn't do it out of disapproval of his new found entertainment.
"yea Beth tell him how you made Kim get into a gunfight with the pope", Rick entered the room, his arms crossed.
"I just wanted to see if this thing actually worked"
"and you had to write Kim out of all your options?" Morty snarled.
"That was the first name that popped into my head, I mean, the second, because Jim Carrey's name didn't work-"
"-w-w-Wait Beth YOU WROTE JIM CARREY?"
She gasped and covered her mouth. This was the Sanchez family, the family who loved Jim Carrey, "ugh! Yes" she rolled her eyes like a teenage girl "I didn't know this book could actually work since there's possibly no scientific explanation for it"
Motry was mortifed. Rick groaned, he faceplamed and dragged his fingers across his skin, stretching his lower eye lid. Ryuk chuckled.
"I think he's still alive, look at his twitter! I want to see if he's still alive and it really isn't a weirdo running his twitter!"
"No way. Other than the other Ricks and the galactic federation, he's someone I try to avoid"
xxxxx
The sun was down, a green portal opened in the midst of dimensional creatures going to a party, the beats of the loud music shaking almost everything. First came out Morty and the last was Rick, he clearly was not interested in checking on Jim.
"heh. looks like Jim's thown a large party. No way he's dead", Ryuk grumbled.
"woah look at these monsters! I've seen some of them whisper things to me at night"
Rick and Ryuk shuddered in disgust.
"Morty, I hope you know they are pedophiles" said Ryuk
"and HOLY SHIT THERE'S TWO MOONS"
Beth looked up to the sky, she saw no two moons and not a single monster either. "What are you guys talking about?".
"I knew you'd ask that", Rick pulled his hand out of his coat and had another convenient pair of lenses.
"HOLY SHIT YOU'RE RIGHT THERE ARE TWO MOONS!
AND WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE THINGS" Beth points at the creatures heading to the mansion where the loud music was coming from.
"Yea, yea, whatever. Just remember to not give any negative energy when you enter Jim's mansion"
xxx
"jim!"
The music was loud, Jim couldn't hear Beth calling out his name.
"JIM!"
'Jim' chattered with a creature that closely resembled a sabbatic goat. He gave his signature wide smile, the smile that got him to take the role in the movie The Mask, they clinked their wine glasses and took a sip.
"JIM!"
Beth grabbed his shoulder and turned him around. This wasn't Jim, it was probably a relative.
"Do you know where I can find Jim Carrey?" she asked.
"Jim Carrey? Sorry we have no Jim in our mansion"he smiled. God they all even smile the same she thought.
"What? What do you mean? I thought this was his address"
"I've heard of the name before, I feel like he was an actor in a movie I watched as a child"
"what?", Beth thought they might have gotten the wrong mansion.
Rick was getting frustrated. He could be in the garage upgrading his receiver "Beth. I told you. Jim does not exist!"
"Ofcourse he does dad! That's just some stupid line he uses so that teenagers can think he's hAshTaG woke !" she withdrew her phone and searched the video on youtube and on google, 'Jim carrey';
Your search - Jim Carrey does not exist - did not match any search results.
Suggestions:
Make sure that all words are spelled different more general fewer keywords.
strange?
She logged into her google account and ran through her search history. Rick, Morty, and Ryuk remained unfaltered, two looking for answers and Rick already knowing the answer.
There was nothing.
She googled Jim Carrey again, in other ways, but they all pointed to sites that were inadequate, as if this man never existed yet some how we have false memories of his existence.
They saw her struggling, and scrolling through her history.
"Ahhhemm" Rick cleared his throat, "Jim Carrey does not exist Beth. You have remembered a non-existent person. So does Morty. That's why you couldn't kill a Jim Carrey with a deathnote. It can't kill people from alternate realities. It's called the Mandela effect, countless people recalling memories from other dimensions, one of the greatest loop holes in the human brain"
"I clearly remember watching the Mask with you as a child..." she slowly began to turn herself in.
"Yea I remember Bruce Almighty! Rick you said you don't get along with him very well" Morty added.
"Only when he exists. It's like that memory you had where I told you to pee in a desert and I had to suck your dick because a snake bit your weiner"
"Oh yea I remember Jim!" the man suddenly reassured, "He's my brother!"
Beth refreshed her google history and found evidence of tons of sites she's been to that was about Jim Carrey and even the trailers of his movies.
"What? How? It wasn't here a few minutes ago"
Even the Carrey relative was shocked that he forgot about someone close to him.
"Uh-oh. He's coming" said Rick, not afraid, just a little above being bored and depressed.
A young man with a wide smile made his way through the crowd of weird looking monsters. He held out his arm as he was just a feet away from Beth.
"You're Beth, I presume", he held her hand gently. His skin stretched away from his teeth.
"Did you finally figure out how to exist in one reality Jim?"
"Sort of. I've figured out how to quantum jump and NOT get stuck in between the 5th and 4th dimension, and there's not a single reality where I exist permanently"
"So you did not exist all this time yet still managed to materialize into this reality?" asked Beth, she cocked and eyebrow.
"Indeed. And I've also come back to settle things with Rick" he frowned, that was an expression almost illegal to him.
"Welp. Too bad" Said Rick, "You're going to die of a heart attack"
Beth's eyes spilt open as far as it could, as if she wanted to stop time and push Jim out of the way of an incoming bullet.
Jim choked as his chest tightened, his legs were like wet noodles and he collapsed on the floor. He gasped for air and Beth tended to him, she turned him over, shouting his name but he couldn't hear a thing.
"Hah. Good riddance. Now lets go home"
"DAD!"
"Hey! It was YOU who wrote the name in the book. He was also a part of the galactic federation for a while until he got kicked out for existing and not existing".
"Shouldn't they be having technology that is compatible with these issues by now?" Ryuk inquired.
"HAH. No buddy. His data files kept disappearing and reappearing, they thought it was some sick joke of his, I mean I told them."
xxxxx
[Galactic Federation, Department B]
Two friends shared a meal in the cafeteria. One of them was pink, hairy, and had the eyes of a fly. The other looked like a giant guinea pig and a human hybrid. Snorting and laughing at a small holographic screen placed on their table.
"EL OH EL ecks dee hahahhahaha we've hit 18 million followers already". The hybrid had never been to earth, he was simply fascinated by his origins and began to believe humans speak with online acronyms in real life.
"18 million, whay do you use the word 'million anyways? shouldn't you be using pointless technical jargon for time and measurements like that voltron cartoon does?"
"18 million it is. And look", he sniggered, tilting the screen towards his pink friend "they actually believe Jim Carrey exists LMFAOOOOO"
