Facing His Fears.
Harry could honestly say that when he received a owl from his ex-potions master now headmaster of Hogwarts Severus Snape that he was very shocked indeed. Snape in the owl had asked him, Harry his least favorite student and bane of his existence to come to Hogwarts. Harry's mind flashes back to the last time he had seen the stern man, right after the final battle.
Flashback
The battle was over Harry was exhausted and dirty his friends were in various stages of grief over lost love ones or joy that the war was finally over and they were free of the darkness that had tried to overtake the wizarding world formally known as Lord Voldemort. Harry slipped away from the hustle and bustle around Hogwarts and made his way to the Shrieking Shack, he had one more thing he had to do before he could rest.
As he walked along the dark and empty road to Hogsmeade he mentally reviewed the memories given to him by the very man whom he was going to go bury. His emotions caught up with him. Snape was a hero. He had always saved Harry even when Harry hadn't known it. Harry felt horrible that he hadn't been able to repay the favor.
He knew know how he truly felt about Snape. Truth was he loved him desperately all through Harry's school years he had wanted the mans' approval, had hated that the man loathed him. He had also fell in love with the Half-Blood Prince from his school book, how odd that that turned out to be Snape as well. Harry wasn't delusional enough to think that even if the man had lived that anything would happen between him but knowing the man was dead made his heart deflate in his chest.
He made his way into the desolate shack bracing himself for what he knew he would see. As he approached the figure laying in a puddle of blood on the floor tears started coursing down his soot cover face leaving streaks. He kneeled next to Snape and put him hand out to touch the man. Snape flinched and groaned and Harry jumped surprised, gasping out "Professor! You're alive. Don't worry I'll get you out of here." With as much caution as he could muster he scooped up the injured man into his arms and slowly made his way back to Hogwarts and the infirmary there. He whispered assurances to the man as they went. Harry had no Idea if Snape could hear him but it felt right. Harry didn't notice that more tears feel down his face this time from joy , Snape was alive.
He reached the Infirmary without much incident and Madame Pomphrey was good enough to not comment about his tear streaked face. She went to work instantly on healing the man thought they both knew a full recovery would take some time, but at least he was alive.
After extracting her promises of keeping him updated to the mans' recovery and leaving everything needed to secure the Mans' freedom, he did the only thing that felt safe, he left the wizarding world.
The truth was he was afraid, more afraid than the threat of Voldemort had ever made him. He was afraid that if he stayed Snape would discover his true feelings and he knew they would be rejected. So instead of facing that possibility he had done the only thing that felt safe, leave.
Perhaps he was a coward but by leaving at least he could deal with his broken heart and unrequited love in peace without having to face the man's distain. Because really there was no way that Snape could or would ever want him. So according to harry it was better this way.
So Harry had ran away from the man he loved and the world he knew and a whole year passed by he stayed in contact with his friends and of course Madame Pomphrey. But he never returned to Hogwarts to afraid to face the man he knew he would always love but that would never love him.
End Flashback
This brings us back to Harry receiving the owl from the current headmaster of Hogwarts. As soon as he opened the missive his heart had jumped into his throat and he felt as if he couldn't breathe. He had thought a year away had tempered his feelings but one look at that familiar handwriting made him instantly realize how wrong that assumption had been.
The letter asked him to come to Hogwarts for a much needed conversation. He wasn't sure what that meant nor was he sure what he should do about it. The last thing he really wanted to do was go back to Hogwarts and have to face Snape. He didn't want to be faced with everything he wanted but could never have, what kind of torture that would be.
He summoned a parchment dipped his quill and considered how to answer. Girding his loins he replied that he would be there the next morning after breakfast if that was convenient. Might as well get it over with, because really he couldn't say no to Snape even if he wanted to. Part of him prayed that it would not be convenient.
A few hours later as he was sitting down to supper he received a reply saying that he would be expected the next day. He swallowed thickly but knew that he had to go, like it or not.
