Shattered entirety

Sam is not ready to give up and say yes to Lucifer.

. . .

I know I don't deserve forgiveness
salvation
but it won't stop me from fighting

Dean is beaten
I can see it in his eyes
and it scares me more than anything has ever scared me
before

How can I do this without him?
It's too much

At nights I can feel the panic creep
up on me
I can hear Lucifer's voice echoing
in my ears
and I cry silently
over what was, what is and what might be

Castiel is distraught
which is both strange yet heartbreaking
to witness
He has changed so much
and he's hurting like a human now
if not more

I need to do this
for him too
For all of us