Title: Social Rule B 99.1
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Sirius teaches Remus about Social Rule B 99.1
Based on this cartoon.
Disclaimer: Remus and Sirius etc. belong to JKR, written for fun, not profit.
'It's a beautiful day,' thought Remus. 'The incessant rain had finally stopped.' The sun was shining in through the windows, and the breeze felt heavenly. 'Yet there is absolutely nothing to do.' Remus growled, and dropped his head onto his arms. He was so bored. Remus and Sirius sat in the common room, bored out of their skulls. Prongs was out in Hogsmead with Lily (finally), so there wasn't any Quidditch practice. Wormtail was in a tutoring session, so there was no one to pick on. Everyone else had something to do, the common room was completely empty except for the two of them.
"What do you want to do?" asked Sirius.
"I dunno, what do you want to do?" replied Remus.
"I dunno, you chose something."
"I can't think of anything, you decide."
"I don't bloody know, you pick." Remus rolled his eyes and didn't respond. They had had that conversation at least five times. There was a silence, with Remus picking at his robe and Sirius playing idly with his quill. Suddenly Sirius sat up and yelled, "I got it!!" He was so loud Remus almost fell out of his chair.
"What? And no, we are not feeding Snivillus to the Giant Squid." Sirius made a face.
"I know, I heard you the first three times. But I just remembered something Prongs told me."
"This'll be good," muttered Remus under his breath. If he heard him, Sirius didn't react.
"If friends spend more than sixty minutes unable to decide what to do, they must resort to sexual experimentation." Sirius had a wide grin on his face. Remus actually fell out of his chair this time.
"Moony, you okay?" Sirius asked, his voice puzzled.
"Yeah, Padfoot, I'm fine." Remus picked himself up off the floor, trying to figure out if he heard correctly. "You said what, exactly?"
"If friends spend more than sixty minutes unable to decide what to do, they must resort to sexual experimentation." Remus had heard correctly all right. That didn't mean it made any sense, though.
"Excuse me?"
"Its Social Rule B 99.1."
"I was not aware of that rule. Besides, its only been fifteen minutes." Sirius shot a scathing look at Remus, or at least on that attempted to be scathing. Sirius's facial expressions were about limited to his goofy grin, his real smile, and his come hither look.
"So you want to sit here for another forty-five minutes?" Remus sat back, apparently thinking.
"Get the whipped cream and chocolate sauce and meet me in our dormitory. Oh, and lock the door this time. We scarred poor Peter for life." Sirius chuckled as he made his way out of the common room to get the requested items.
Remus made his way up to the common room, smiling to himself. Who could argue with Social Rule B 99.1?
