The day after the wedding, Edward kept his promise

The day after the wedding, Edward kept his promise. He changed me. And he was changed.

I woke up the morning after our wedding night. We were in his gigantic bed with the black satin sheets. He, of course, was simply staring at me. His eyes were no longer the liquid amber they had been last night. I could see the darkness creeping in to the edges of the irises. He was preparing himself. He didn't want to tell me too much about what his role would be, but I knew from Alice he would have to control himself more during my transformation than any other time previously. All the Cullens would be present and ready to step in should he lose control and be unable to stop himself from simply killing me. So he prepared meticulously to avoid that. He would need just the right amount of thirst to complete this task. That's all Alice would say.

"Good morning Bella Cullen."

I swallowed hard.

"Good morning to you too." I smiled.

"This is the last time I'm going to say this, but I have to try one more time."

I groaned audibly. I knew this speech practically by heart. You have a choice. You don't have to do this. I'll love you forever no matter if you're human or vampire. Etc.

"No more Edward, please. I know my mind and I'm ready."

He sighed and pushed himself out of the big bed. He slid into a thick black robe and walked to the wall of windows. After a moment I climbed out of bed and pulled his black t-shirt on as I made my way quietly to stand behind him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and felt him jolt. He turned in my arms.

"I actually didn't know you were behind me until I felt your arms." He smiled.

"Is that even possible?" I laughed.

"I'm distracted."

"I know."

"Bella…"

"Please Edward. We've said all there is to say a thousand times. I know it all. I'm ready."

I guess I imagined that this would be a ceremony or something similar to my wedding vows, but of course I was completely wrong. We did it at the kitchen table of all places. I sat in the chair and Edward sat next to me. The whole family, except Jasper was gathered around. Alice apologized for Jasper. He was too afraid he could not control himself.

Carlisle looked at me and nodded and I nodded back.

My very last word to Edward as a human was "Where?"

He smiled, kissed me and said, "Here, my love." Then I felt his gentle lips against my neck, then the cool smooth surface of his teeth, and then pain that flashed so bright it brought me to my knees.

Three days later, I awoke alone in a white room on a white bed. I sat up suddenly. I looked down at my arm and saw the I.V. sticking out of my hand. It was attached to a bag hanging from a metal pole. I read the label. "Morphine." I stared curiously at the needle, and realized I felt not a bit queasy. In fact, my skin felt like steel and the needle felt like nothing more than a mosquito that needed to be brushed away. I smiled and ripped the needle out of my arm and threw it on the floor. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and landed on my feet in a move that felt graceful and beautiful. I twirled in a circle and jumped and leapt with a dancer's grace. The Bella that tripped over her own feet was no more. I was still examining my own new body when the white door swished open and Edward walked in. His black clothes were in stark contrast to my white room and white gown. We looked like opposites and suddenly I was nervous.

"Bella" his voice sounded luscious to my ears.

"Edward." I spoke and the sound of my voice was delicate and beautiful.

"How are you feeling?" He asked tentatively.

I laughed. "I feel wonderful."

"Good, love." He smiled, but it did not reach his eyes.

Suddenly I felt his mind inside mine, or rather, attempting to go inside mine. I felt my mind put up a wall. I was aware of his intent a second before it happened.

"No peaking." I smiled.

"You can tell I'm trying to hear your thoughts now?" He asked mischievously.

"I can feel you, your mind trying to get in." I said in wonderment.

"Can you let me in, if you chose?"

"I don't know." I puzzled. I closed my eyes and said "try again."

He did and I felt his mind coming toward me with a soothing feeling and I pictured the wall lowering. His mind entered mine and I could feel it sweeping through my thoughts and memories. It tickled as he turned back the past and re-examined, now able to 'hear' my side of events. I felt time turn back to when he left me, broken and alone and suddenly that wall came slamming down hard.

I opened my eyes to see Edward holding the sides of his head.

"Edward!"

"No, its fine… just hurt for a moment." He smiled, still wincing from the pain.

"I'm so sorry." I went to him and put my arms around him. I gently stroked his cheek. "Hey, you're not cold!"

He laughed suddenly into the silence of the room. "Not to you now, not anymore" he said softly as he touched my arm, stroking it gently. His skin, previously so cold, so hard, was soft and warm…and alive.

I touched him in awe.

"How…How do I look to you?" I asked, unable to meet his eyes.

"Oh Bella." His voice was so pained that it brought my eyes snapping back to his. His face was drawn tight, mouth set. "You are still the most beautiful creature I have ever seen." He said with deep sadness.

"Don't be sad. I'm not." I said as I leaned forward and kissed him fiercely.

He broke the kiss after a long minute and put his hands on my shoulders. "Bella," he began, his voice strained in a way I had never heard before. "You've been in here for three days. This room, it's a special room…" he broke off again and turned and paced.

I realized I hadn't taken a breath. I waited, staring at him until he turned and faced me. "Just say it." I whispered.

"When you leave this room, you'll feel the thirst. You'll smell the blood and you'll need it."

"I know that." I was surprised by the steadiness of my voice.

"You'll be different…for a while. You remember that newborn, Bree?"

Truthfully, I had thought of nothing else. She was the only newborn I had ever seen and her vicious attempted attack on me still gave me chills. But she didn't understand about choices, about not feeding from humans. And of course, she didn't have Edward.

"Yes, I remember."

"That's how it is."

"Edward." I said, losing patience now. "I know all this. Do you think I'm not prepared?"

"No, no it's not that."

"What then?" I asked as I touched his face. His skin, previously so cold and hard was warm and pliant under my white hand.

"This is just overwhelming." He gave a small shrug of his shoulders. He pushed a button on the door and it swished open. He stepped through as he caught my hand in his and pulled me through. I was expecting to be overcome by the hunger for blood, the desire to feed, but instead it was a feeling that rocked me back on my heels. A feeling of loathing so completely washed over me. Distantly, I heard a painful grimace. I turned to see Edward, face twisted, shaking his hand to relieve pain. I looked at my own hand and realized that I had squeezed his fingers so tightly, I had hurt him. That fact alone would have been shocking to me if I hadn't still been overcome by these feelings that were swirling around me. Hatred, red and hot, filled my chest. I swung my head sharply to the left and saw Rosalie. Suddenly Edward was by my side.

"Rosalie?"

"How's Bella?" she asked, her voice a pleasant mask.

"Seems to be alright." He answered just as pleasantly. I was stunned by the calm exchange. Just as suddenly, the red hatred vanished and was replaced with calm blue serenity. I knew, without turning that Jasper had entered the small hallway. I spoke without turning.

"It won't help Jasper; I already know what's in her heart." I violently pushed his serene feelings back at him. I heard his gasp and crumbling of his body to the floor.

"Jasper!" Edward yelled and immediately went to his side.

"I'm alright." He breathed deeply. "She's sees Edward."

I turned at his words. Edward was standing now, staring at me. I could tell by his furrowed brow that he was trying, yet again, to read my thoughts. I had seen that expression many times before, followed by his frustrated oath at the inability to crack my mind. This time however, I heard him instead.

"Bella, tell me what you see?" his mind whispered inside mine.

"It's not seeing Edward. It's knowing." I flicked my eyes up to meet his and caught the alarmed look pass through them. I pushed my new skill inside him and for a brief instant I saw regret. Deep, regret.