Author's Note: Had Sailor Moon on the brain, so this happened. I hope you enjoy it! Or survive it, anyway... ;) If you want to see more, please leave a review! Otherwise, this will stay a one-shot.


Maritama stalked through the high grass around the mouth of the cave. Her fame-hogging cousin might have found that bun-headed blonde ditz in Tokyo, but any lazy feline could find scantily-clad superheroes in a big city. Real heroes are found in a random hole in the ground! And soon it would be her name plastered across all the designer cat beds and delicious canned cat foods. But not ones with fish in them. Some fish are really amazing once you get to know them, even though they have a penchant for burning dinner.

Her tail shot straight up as she heard someone approaching quickly. Turning in the direction of the commotion, she saw a human burst through the thick overgrowth of vegetation, a bag in hand and a slice of buttered toast in their mouth.

"Muh num iff Fishk," they mumbled, the bread garbling their speech as they continued to run. "I' eigh' year' ol'. An 'oday-" the character introduction monologue was interrupted by their own screaming as they fell headlong into the cave.

"Are you hurt, young one," Maritima shouted into the darkness.

"Waaahhhh," cried the human in a manner unique to Japanese cartoons.

"Well, they sure are whining like a protagonist," she muttered as she navigated down the rocks to the bottom of the cave. "Maybe I found someone after all."

She landed softly beside the child who was cradling a scraped knee, surrounded by yellow flowers and pages of homework.

"What's your name," she asked as the back of her fur shot up. She knew she had stumbled on more than just this protagonist.

"My name is Frisk," they answered, sniffling. "When I was born, my parents were afraid that I would become a protagonist someday. They tried to hide it, but I escaped. Because that is my way of the protagonist! Believe it!"

"I hope we don't get sued," she sighed. "Listen," she explained in a louder voice, "there isn't much time. There is a great evil here. You must transform quickly! Here, take this." She used her teeth to put a plate of spaghetti in Frisk's hands. Because she had pockets or something.

"But I'm not hungry-"

"No! Hold this up and repeat after me! Ready?"

"Ready."

"Okay. Now-"

"Okay. Now-"

"Stop it!"

"Stop it!"

"A loser says 'what'?"

"Ha-ha! You're a loser."

"Listen," barked Maritama in an un-catlike manner. "There's not much time! Hold that Transformetti Spaghetti and say 'Don't regretti! Eat some spaghetti'!"

"Don't regretti," they began, neon sparkles hanging in the air and surrounding them. "Eat some spaghetti!"

The powerful pasta wrapped around them, changing their sweater and pants to a Japanese school girl's uniform that would get any actual Japanese schoolgirl expelled in a heartbeat.

"In the name of Determination," said Frisk, posing, "I will spare you!"

"Howdy, Sailor Frisk," came a demonically deep voice. The two turned to see a small flower with a voice that shook the cave walls. "Looks like you're new here."

"Go, now," shouted


Alphys stared at her fanfic on the screen. It wasn't uncommon for her to do something odd while sleep-deprived, but she could hardly remember sitting down to write it. It stopped in the middle of a sentence, likely indicating the point at which she either fell asleep or decided to move on to something better. She deleted the document before cracking open a good manga.