Sadly the piece of sexiness of Hotchner and Reid do not belong to these poor reclusive writers.

-SSA Agents Maliri Sapphire Jameson and her younger sister Laney Lynn Reid walked in to the bullpen in a deep discussion about Laney's husband's so called "Reid-effect." SSA Agent Rossi meandered over in a fog of Rossi induced ego-boosters. 'How's it shaken my baby kittens? A loud crack echoed through the bullpen as Maliri smacked Rossi's pervish hand away from her boob. Morgan wondered up behind and said "dude you should know better than to tease a women on her period…I mean her "time of the month." Another crack echoed through the bullpen as a PO'ed Garcia smacked him with her oversized clutch. Maliri spoke in a voice that melted over the skin like Israeli wine and was noticeably German "Morgeiin vat is your probluum." Little Laney who until this point looked noticeably bored suddenly spoke up, "Where is Reid? He promised his ass was mine today." Everyone suddenly started snickering as Reid walked out in his best suit with a dozen roses. Maliri burst into tears and fled the room like a wounded doe. Garcia was in hot pursuit. When she found her in the bathroom a raised needle in hand and Dilaudid in the other. She calmly sat down next to her and whispered "what's wrong my little German hottie?" Maliri mumbled something about unwantedness. Garcia promptly replied "what do you see in the mirror because I see a short, tiny boned, black waist length haired, green eyed, freckled beauty!" Maliri lunged into Garcia's arms and dropped the needle. "We are going to get you help" whispered Garcia with unending conviction.

-Meanwhile-Hotch wondered down into the bullpen when he saw Agent Maliri flee like a mouse from a snake. He calmly asked "what the hell is going on here." Reid walked over and tried to explain but it sounded like gobbilty gooke. Rossi wondered over and explained the whole thing, "….And she ran off with Garcia in hot pursuit." Hotch asked in a voice like a cobra ready to strike "and none of you notice she hates relationships, have none of you asked about her past?" They all mumbled what sounded like a no. "Then I'll tell," Said Hotch "Okay when she was ten her father snuck into her room and raped her within an inch of her life, This continued until age 16 when she was kidnapped and beaten till near death, that was where the early BAU stepped in. Her parents abandoned her at an orphanage shortly after the rescue and that's when Gideon adopted her after the foster care father figure raped all the young women in their care. When she got out of high school she didn't know what to be so Gideon suggested she attend the BAU Academy and become a profiler, while in the academy she went out with a young profiler by the name of Riley who on the second date raped her and left her for dead in a sewer. I was the first to turn up at the crime scene and found her. When I found her she threw her arms around me and would not let go they had to pry her off but not till she had kissed me." At this point Hotch was blushing so hard he looked like a sunburned penguin. "She joined the BAU shortly after and met a young women on one of the cases who she basically called her fake sister little Laney Lynn Macon. She had just finished high school so she recommended she attend BAU Academy as a Tech Analysis worker because she was already on the CSI's list and several other lists. Mal is also part of the reason along with Rossi so many fraternization rules exist here. But she cannot stand relationships and hates to see men acting so sweet with the ladies." Everyone looked downtrodden at her life story and how depressing it was.

-Another Meanwhile-

Maliri could tell Garcia had more questions like "how long have you been addicted or what's really wrong with you?" Garcia asked the question that was looming like day old tuna parmesan, "What's actually wrong with you?" Maliri chocked slightly and then sighed, "Okay so right after Haley was shot I helped babysit Jack and one night Hotch showed up late and started apologizing and I told him Jack was asleep already so he would have to be careful. Anyways Hotch tripped on my door frame and we went tumbling into my wall and we accidently kissed and we didn't stop and I kept thinking something was wrong with it but I didn't voice it and he managed to get everything but my panties off before I thought again and I was too into it to care so I went along with it and I woke up the next morning and they were gone and we hadn't used protection and I wasn't on birth control so a couple of weeks later after I couldn't quit throwing up I realized something was wrong so I took 5 pregnancy tests and they all came back positive so I went to a doctor and they confirmed it." Garcia added what she thought in" so you told him and he didn't take it well?" Maliri "I wish, I didn't tell him and 9 months later and I had a beautiful girl named Beth Sophia Aaron Hotchner. I still listed him as the father and used his last name so I must be desperate!" Garcia replied calmly "do you have a photo?" "Yeah," she replied. "Rossi and Gideon are the grandfathers, Morgan and Reid are the Godfathers, You and JJ are the Godmothers, Emily is the grandmother, and Laney is the aunt. Unknown to them Hotch had been standing outside the bathroom and had heard everything.

-I know it is not my best work but me and my sister came up with this and we had to turn it into a story and the pictures are on the profile.