A Girl Named April

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of rain

And dark clouds

And the rain drowned her joy

And ran down her face

And her tears mingled with the rain

And made cracks in her wax mask

And blood started to leak through the cracks

But she just smoothed it over with hard sandpaper

And pasted more wax on

To hide the broken girl underneath

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of bright flowers

But the petals of hers were dark and ugly

And ivy climbed up her chest

And crumbled her heart

And constricted her lungs

Til she couldn't breathe

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of life

But the girl was dying

She was numb

And her heart had been imprisoned

While her mind was a dark expanse

That stank of blood

And she couldn't inhale

For her lungs were

trapped

in her

own

anxiety

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of spring

But the girl was a doll

Lifeless

Her body was a living carcass

Her bones rattled

when she tried to breathe

And her eyes had gone dry

And her breath smelt like

Salt water and stale makeup

And she had already seen her grave

For she was digging it

Herself.

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of beauty

So she looked in the mirror

That mirror was her cruel teacher

It showed her the fat in her thighs

And rolls on her stomach

So she didn't eat

Now you could count her ribs

And wrap your hand round her stomach

The mirror taught her how to

Destroy herself

There was a girl

Named for the fourth month

The month of hope and fresh air

But the girl couldn't breathe

She was suffocating

Drowning in expectations

And failed dreams

But then a drop of sunlight

Fell through the thick grey clouds

And the acid rain

And the girl captured it

And she called it Hope

And she put it into a jar

On her shelf

And she held on to the Hope

That one day

Maybe her

Lungs

Would learn

How to breathe again.

There was a girl

Named April

The month of dreams

And one day

All her dreams

Came true

And the rain stopped

And the clouds shifted

And she

Could

Finally

Breathe.