After seeing that picture of future lucy, head in her hands and alone in one of the bunker room, I immediatly thought how Lucy could be the one that finds her in that state and the conversation that would follow.
*It is NOT SPOILERY - Just something that came out of my mind after seeing that picture*
Lucy was wandering around the bunker and trying to make sense to all that happened to her those last few months. Watching her future self and future Wyatt stepping out of the LifeBoat was to say the least shocking. She didn't know what was more surprising : how they looked or how they acted toward each other. It didn't make sense. At all.
Of course her and Wyatt had had their share of disagreement but they never made it to a point of no return. Those versions were literally interacting with each other without actually talking. Or even watching each other. It's like they already knew what the other thought, acknowledged it and moved on to the next task.
Robots. That's it. They were acting like robots with each other. And it didn't sit well with Lucy. How did they end up like this ? What happened to the both of them ? So many questions about her future self and her actuel self. Wow, if Amy could hear her, she would have a field day. Well Amy, you wanted me to go and live my life and make my own choices, here I am dear sister, talking to myself about myself and my future self.
Hours earlier, Wyatt told her he loved her and he said that she didn't have to say anything back. He loves her. And Rufus had pressed him to do something about it. That's another thing she couldn't wrap her mind and it was eating her from inside. She had done everything in her power to move on from him, to let loose any hopes she had of him coming back to her. Even when they learned Jessica was Rittenhouse, she hadn't let any hope get in back. she couldn't let him back again in her heart. It was and still too painful for her to even think that something could still happen.
One thought to another, she found herself walking past what it seemed like a room she never stepped a foot in where the light was filtering through an almost closed door. She stopped her tracks, followed her instinct telling her to open that door and at her surprise, found her future self, sitting on a cot, her hands in her head, trying to control her breathing.
Lucy stepped slowly inside and moved till she was in front of her future self and asked :
" Are you okay ?"
Then, she turned around and walked to the wall facing her and mumbled " Oh my god, I literally asked myself if she was okay".
Future Lucy didn't move or say anything. Sensing that her answer could take long, Lucy kept walking to the wall facing Future Lucy and sat on the floor and waited.
It seemed forever, but at one point, Future Lucy held her head back, watched Lucy and said :
" Well I now understand why people always told me I was stubborn".
Lucy looked at her intensely and said :
" You look... sad."
Future Lucy chuckled and answered : " Pot calling the kettle black".
" Well, at this point, you have some advantage on me : you know all the reasons I'm sad about but I don't have a clue why you're sad. Feel sharing with the class ? " said Lucy in her best confident tone. She needed answers and if her present was full of many questions left unanswered, she needed to know what happens for her to become like the woman she's facing.
When Future Lucy didn't answer, Lucy kept on :
" Tell me, what does it takes in the future to become like this" as she gestured the form of Future Lucy.
" Believe me, you don't want to become anything like me" stated Future Lucy.
" Why not ? You seem to be everything I'm not at this moment. Strong. Confident. In control. A bit bruised but I guess the others you took a punch at look worse. And I think you have muscles I never knew about so, yeah, I think you're an upgraded version of me".
Future Lucy, with a sad smile, said : " You are looking at what I am physically"
" Well, given the lack of feelings you show, you didn't give me much to work with. So I am asking again, what does it take to become like this ?", said Lucy, this time much firmly.
While the hesitation was passing through Future lucy's eyes, Lucy saw her toying with her ring finger, almost as if there was something missing there.
" Let's say that the reason I'm like this is the same reason why I'm back, here, in this bunker hole. I… I made some bad choices." She paused, looking at as if reflecting the moments right in front of her. " Ones that I have to literally live with. Everyday. I toughened up because there were not other way for me to keep waking up to this life. We lived in a world where Rufus died. He was no more here to keep us grounded."
At this mention, Lucy shot her a look.
" What ? Of course he did. Somewhere between all these jokes, he was the one who kept us it were up to me and Wyatt, we would have killed each other long ago. In fact, I can't remember one time in five years where Wyatt and I didn't almost kill each other out of anger" she chuckled at the memory but that smile disappeared as soon as it appeared.
" Between two panic attacks and one joke about the time period we were in, he always proved himself to be courageous and fair. He saved our lives many times and kept our mental status in check, always. Without him, we began to doubt ourselves and each other. Rufus wasn't there for me when I needed his insight and he wasn't there for Wyatt to…
At this point ,let's say that Wyatt and I, we do see eye to eye concerning one thing : Saving Rufus."
With tears in her eyes, Lucy dared to ask.
" And you're fine with it?"
Future Lucy raised from the cot and walked to Lucy. She then sat next to her, took her hand, and said :
" What do you think I was doing back there ?"
" Hiding ?" said Lucy.
Future Lucy smiled :
" Yes, we are definitely alike. I've been hiding for five long years and I'm exhausted. I want to give myself a chance at a re-do. I want to give myself a chance to change my choices and most importantly, I want to have the chance to live a great love story. I've been living with resent and love at the same time for the same man for five years. I've been hiding from him. I let him think that I've changed so I could face him everyday without breaking down. Truth is, I've been breaking down almost every night for five years behind closed doors and I am tired of this. I don't know what it's like to him but… I stayed at his side because somehow I was hoping that we could change fate together and I want to believe that in saving Rufus, we could save more than one life."
Lucy squeezed Future lucy's hand and said :
" I've been watching him you know. The future Wyatt I mean. First of all, what is the deal with the beard ?" At that mention, Future lucy laughed and nodded in approbation. " Body language is not lying. You may not talk or look at each other, but the way he restrains himself to let his body next you, well, I would say that he minds. And I just can't believe that I'm trying to get you understand that maybe it isn't over for him either. Maybe it's because you spent too many times resenting him but I know the look of hope when I see it in Wyatt's eyes and it is still do you say about stopping the hiding and get to work ?"
Lucy got up and took Future Lucy's hand to help her getting on her legs. Together, they stopped hiding from what was really worth in their respective lives and made their way to the Lifeboat that would change the course of their lives.
