Hey guys! I got this idea out of nowhere from the whole, "Rufioh and Tavros have matching dick and nose rings" thing and it just... I don't even know why... please enjoy, Homestuck © Andrew Hussie. I own nothing.


Light filtered through the slightly opened blinds of the dim and gloomy hotel room, a bottle of alcohol clattered to the floor, rolling across the room and hitting one of the horns of none other than Rufioh Nitram. Slowly he shook awake, groaning as he sat up. He looked around, confused out of his mind as he rose up and stumbled around, his whole body full of pain and his whole mind full of empty. He spread his wings, checking to see if they were still there. They were, and he continued to shuffle through the room, the first other he came across was his little brother, Tavros, who was in as much as a mess as he was. His mohawk was ruffled and his clothes were grimey with sweat and booze and dirt. And a nose ring had mysteriously appeared on his face. He snorted and something lightly tapped his upper lip. He felt his face, and realized he had a nose ring too. Oh. My. God.

He ran to the bathroom, bounding over Cronus Ampora's unconscious form, and slid to a stop in front of the mirror, all he could do was make a shocked breathy sound. He stared at the reflection in awe. Just what in the hell did they do last night? A grunt came from behind him and he turned around to the tub. In the bathtub laid Kankri Vantas. He looked in a worse shape than anybody, half his hair was shaved off and was replaced with a tribal tattoo, with his symbol incorporated in it. His sweater was gone, revealing his ridiculously high pants, finally on his hand appeared to be a makeshift ring made from a bottle cap of a Heineken bottle.

He tried his best to hold in his laughter, as he gently poked Kankri in the face. He mumbled and promptly told Rufioh to fuck off in his sleep. He sighed and pulled out his phone, turned it onto his music app, and began to blare the Peter Pan song of 'He can Fly' at full volume.

"I BELIEVE TINKERBELL." was the first thing that erupted from the living room, out of Tavros's mouth. Rufioh laughed and walked back into the living room after Kankri clumsily fell out of the tub, cursing like his younger brother. Cronus, on the other hand, continued to snore. As Rufioh walked past the table, which was covered in... booze and medical supplies? He walked back to the table. Oh my god. The table was covered in spilled booze and medicinal alchohol, and a shit ton of bandages and not to mention, lots of multicolored blood. Mainly yellow. Wait, wasn't Sollux with them last night? Rufioh looked around the hotel room, searching for the missing Captor as the rest of his gang gathered their wits. He did find Gamzee Makara passed out inside the washing machine, whom was drenched in soapy water, and bandages on his face, not only that but a huge wave of pot smell was coming from his entirety. Tavros was the first to approach Rufioh.

"Rufioh, what happened last night? I-I only drank a few!" He said, slightly panicked. Rufioh pointed down to the unconscious highblood and Tavros followed the direction of his finger. "Oh my gog Gamzee, really?" The younger Nitram sighed. Rufioh looked around the room again, back to where he had woken up, he rummaged around until he found his cellphone and opened it- HOLY SHIT THATS ALOT OF PHOTOS. His eyes widens as he searched through the photos; bars, booze, women, tattoos, nose rings... what the hell was that? He went back to pictures and looked at the weird thing on the screen. It was two brown wiggly things with a gray background and Jacob's latter piercing. Then it hit him. HIS BULGE. He quickly looked in his pants, confirming his suspicions. Well, looks like he and Tavros are going to be matching the rest of their lives.

"TRIGGER." Said Kankri, whom had snuck up on Rufioh from behind to see what was on his phone. Rufioh turned around and told Kankri to shut up, walking away from the other troll. He grabbed the back of Cronus's shirt, shaking him awake.

"OK. Group meeting up on the roof guys, come on." He waited for everyone to get up and at it, then led the group up to the roof, his phone in hand. As he busted through the door onto the roof, he stopped dead in his tracks, followed closely by the rest. They stood a good 30 feet off the ground, looking over a HUUUUUUUUGE city, and a brightly colored, neon lit, and skyscraper filled one at that. Rufioh sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Of all the places to loose someone...

"Um, chief? Vwhere are vwe?" Cronus asked groggily, leaning on Kankri for support. Rufioh sighed again and turned to Tavros, Gamzee, Kankri and Cronus. He uttered two names that made all four of their jaws drop, groaning in their previous idiocy.

"Tokyo, Japan."