The Perverted Sensei, the Bug-Eyed, and the Black-Haired Uchiha

Perverts, Freaks, and Lovers

Chapter One

A young 16-year-old, emerald-eyed, pink-haired kunoichi gazed out of the open window in her room. The sky rippled in shades of oranges and burgundies as the golden sun set, part of it already hiding behind the horizon.

The girl's one true love, and also her other teammate, had left the Village Hidden in the Leaves earlier that day. They both had left to hone their ninja skills and to train with each other. Unfortunately, her perverted sensei had not left with them- the perverted sensei that would occasionally pop out of no where into Sakura's room (one time when she was changing her clothes) and would always claim that it was a simple accident.

That perverted bastard of a sensei! Inner Sakura yelled in rage. One of these days I'm going to murder Kakashi and find a new sensei! I mean, just because Sasuke left doesn't mean that I'm going to fall for the very next guy I see! Cha!!

Ploing!! With a puff of smoke a ninja with silver hair and a mask that covered part of his face sprang into Sakura's room. Darn it!! Kakashi thought to himself. She's not changing her clothes again. But just look at that angry face. I'm in luck; she must be having her period again!

"KAKASHI SENSEI!!" Sakura screeched at the top of her lungs. "I'M GONA KILL YOU ONE OF THESE DAYS, YOU PERVERT!"

"So I was right," Kakashi said aloud. "It definitely seems that you really are having your period."

Sakura cracked her fingers, then clenched her hand into a fist. She swung her arm into an uppercut so hard that her sensei rocketed into the wall, causing it to crack.

"One: You're GOING TO LEAVE ME ALONE FOREVER. TWO: YOU'RE GOING TO STOP BEING A PERVERTED ASS," Sakura shouted. "AND THREE: YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THE WALL THAT YOUR BODY WAS EVER SO CARELESS ENOUGH TO CRACK. IF YOU DON'T DO ANY ONE OF THOSE THINGS I'M GOING TO SLIT YOUR THROAT WITH A SHURIKEN, THROW YOUR DEAD, LIFELESS BODY INTO THE RIVER, AND SAY THAT ROCK LEE DID ALL! GOT IT?"

"Yes, of course," Kakashi pleaded for his life like a pathetic little wimp. "But since when did you have anything against Lee?"

"GET OUT NOW!" Sakura roared like a tiger.

"Okay, okay, okay! Just don't hurt me any more," Kakashi exclaimed, then left with another puff of smoke.

Within the next thirty seconds Sakura could hear that someone was climbing up on her house, probably about to jump in through her window. That damn sensei! When will he learn that I'm serious! Well possibly after his death finally arrives… Inner Sakura trailed on.

The kunoichi walked over to her window, her eyes closed in irritation. She raised her fist, ready to pummel the one and only, perverted sensei, Kakashi. Right when the person had reached the window her fist flew and launched into the ninja's face.

"So it is true," a new voice said in a painful tone. "You really do have something against me and my youthfulness."

Startled, Sakura opened her eyes and saw a boy ninja that wore a green jumpsuit, had a soup-bowl haircut, bug-eyes, bushy eyebrows, and Sakura's fist in his face. It was Rock Lee.

" Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought that you were Kakashi sensei," Sakura apologized, moving her fist back to her side. " And where did you get that crazy idea that I had something against you?"

"Well, you were yelling so loud a minute ago that half the village could hear you. I even heard the part when you said that you would kill Kakashi and blame the whole thing on me," Rock Lee admitted. "So, what do you have against me?"

"Well, umm," Sakura choked. What should she say? Should she be honest, or lie like she usually did. She fought a battle with Inner Sakura and managed to decide to be honest to Lee. "Don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes people think that you know… that you're gay."

"Of course I am happy, joyful, merry, glad, and youthful," Lee answered. "Why wouldn't I be glad?"

"No, I mean the other kind of gay," Sakura replied. Being honest was harder than what she thought it would be. "I meant the kind of gay where you like guys."

"Of course I like Gai sensei," Lee said in response. "Why wouldn't I like my own sensei? He and I are filled with so much youthfulness."

"No, I don't mean Gai sensei," Sakura shook her head. "I mean like, or loving, other guys, as in other boys, in a kinda sexual way."

Lee's face looked like a barrage of bullets had hit it, but that might have just been from Sakura's fist earlier. " I'm truly, truly shocked that you, of all people, would say such a disgraceful, heartbreaking thing about me," Rock Lee spoke, tears flowing down his face. "For the one and only one that I love is you, my cherry blossomed Sakura. And that love will never die out of my youthful heart no matter how many tears I shed upon my fiery youthfulness."

That's the end of chapter one. It's a little sappier than what I would have liked, but such is life. I hope that the next chapter will be longer than this one, and based more on humor over romance.(This is my first story on fanfiction, so that is why it's so short.)