She was standing there, watching as people walked around, without seeming to notice her. Most of them had a smile on their faces, probably because it was when everything seemed to be just fine. They called it Christmas.
The first time he told her about it, she couldn't possibly imagine that children would swallow such nonsense: a fat man visiting every house in the world, going down the chimney carrying a bag even bigger than him, and leaving presents to all those unknown children. It was just lame that grownups lied to kids that way, but the most amazing thing was that, even when they grew up and learned the truth about the Christmas, they still enjoyed it like they were little kids. Even him, who had a hard time accepting everything she taught him, even after almost losing his life to it, seemed slightly happier around those days. Were humans so desperate to be happy that they consciously decided to take all that crap?
Yet, she told herself, even she got caught up in the joy that surrounded the house the year she spent Christmas at his place. Yuzu would keep bugging her about what was her favorite cake for Christmas, and even Karin would shyly ask her if she wanted her to put mistletoe over the doors (she never got to know why Karin would ask such a thing, but after seeing how he chased her all around the house in anger, she decided that it'd be best to leave the mistletoe alone). But the best part, no doubt, was Christmas Eve, when they had to go out late at night to take care of a call from the central. After taking care of the job, he said he would not wait for her to send the report to Soul Society, because he was dropping dead from tiredness. She thought it was rude of him, but didn't bother to pick a fight, since she too was almost fainting. However, when she got home, she found him already asleep, and saw a little box on top of her futon inside the wardrobe. She could barely keep a leash on her tears when she opened the present: a very cute white necklace, with a little Chappi as a pendant. Of course, she didn't think of saying "thanks" the next morning; she just showed the present off to anyone that came close to her (even the counter girl on the fast-food place they went to get dinner to that day). She still wasn't sure, after all those years, if what she had thought she saw was actually there, but the hidden smirk on his face while hearing her brag about her present had seemed so real back then, that she understood for a second why humans loved that time of the year so much.
When she got back to the present, she realized that, out of nowhere, snow had started to fall, and that the street was empty now. However, there in the middle of the street, a man was standing alone on the middle of the blizzard, looking up at the sky as if he was waiting for something.
"Or someone" she thought, as her heart skipped a beat when she noticed who it was.
"It's cold out here, Rukia." he said suddenly, and somehow his voice got through the snow and got to her ears. It was still the same: every time she heard that voice, a small, home-like feeling filled her from the inside, as if something clicked in its place inside her body. Even while noticing this, a part of her panicked that he had seen her, that he had recognized her, but after a couple of seconds, he saw a second figure running to him: a very small figure, with a rather high-pitched voice, and an orange hair that left no doubts over who was her father.
"But I like the snow, dad!" the girl cried loudly, and her father couldn't do anything but laugh at how excited she was. The glow on her eyes was so familiar, that her heart ached when she noticed what it was missing there: a part of her own glow.
How could she have been that naïve? Did she really believe that he would stay the same forever? No, it wasn't that. She knew he would grow up, even if she wasn't there, even if she stopped caring and waiting for him. But she never stopped to think (never had the nerves, actually) that, while growing up oblivious to their existence, he would find something else to be attached to. Something that could fill the hole that forgetting them would leave in his soul. Well, he certainly had found it, and even when it made her hate herself, she was sad that he did. She knew it was no tragic history: sooner or later, he'd go to Soul Society and regain all of his memories of what had happened when he was just a teenager. But he would not be the same man; he wouldn't even be anything near that. She could bear that; they'd have literally thousands of years to catch up and rebuild their bonds, once he was there. But now, while watching him play with that orange-haired girl that by some rare chances had her name, she realized that, even if he regained his memories that they erased from his mind, he wouldn't forget his life, and what he had done as a regular person. And that child, the one that looked so like him that she couldn't get to dislike her, was the living proof that he had really found the best thing of his life. She knew him very well: he'd never, ever let his daughter and his wife alone, not even on the afterlife. Why it bothered her so much, she couldn't (or wouldn't) tell, but the pain that she felt when realizing that she wouldn't be the most important girl on his life again was just comparable to the pain she felt the first time she thought he was dead. That time, while watching him bleed to death on the middle of the street, she thought she had lost him, but there still was a tiny bit of hope hidden on her chest (the same hope that helped her carry on through the next month, up to her frustrated execution). Now, she realized, there was no hope at all. She had really lost him this time, and the fact that he was happy because of it didn't make it any easier.
"Go back inside Rukia. Else you'll catch a cold" he said, and his voice made her stay where she was, finding herself anxious to hear him again, one last time.
The girl glared at him, but did as he told her, and after throwing a bunch of snow to his face, she ran inside laughing madly. He stood there, frowning, although the Rukia on the street could say that he was struggling not to laugh.
"You should go home as well, girl" he said a moment later, sending a chill through her spine. How could it be that he saw her? Could it be that he remembered…?
"That's a weird uniform, by the way" he commented, turning around to see her better, with a confused expression on his face. "Do you practice Kendo or something?" he asked, and she giggled quietly at his question.
"You could say so." She answered, trying to find a way to leave without looking weird. Even at this point, she couldn't bear to be embarrassed in front of him. "That's a cute kid" she said, not knowing where that had come from.
"Yeah. She's a really nice midget" he answered, causing nothing but more pain to the raven-haired Shinigami. "I try my best, but sometimes it's just…" he commented, but stopped when he noticed that he was telling his problem to a complete stranger.
"Well, I'm sure you are a fine father" she told him, trying to keep the tears inside her eyes. She decided that it had been enough, but couldn't get her foots moving. "That's a weird name, by the way." She said suddenly, and covered her mouth with her hand right after, cursing herself for the comment. She didn't want to know! She didn't need it!
"Yeah, well…" he said, looking kind of embarrassed. "The truth is, I don't know where it came from." He confessed, and a really weird expression covered his face for a second. "It's just that, whenever I say it or hear it, I feel… good. You know what I mean?" he asked, and was shocked when he saw a tear rolling down the stranger's cheek.
"Not really" Rukia answered, and turned around to leave. It was just too much to face right now: she would think about it later, on the years and years she had until he arrived to her world. "I have to go now" she told him, but got no answer at all. Sadder than she'd been on the past ten years, she started to walk away, with just a quiet "see you around" as a goodbye. After a couple of feet, however, a really low whisper caught her attention, and she stood there, frozen, wondering if she was going insane and if it would be such a bad thing.
"See you around, Rukia" said Ichigo's voice, and the words melted with the snow, that somehow seemed a bit less cold and a bit more home-like now.
