Kiki: Ah, everyone has one of these at the top of their fan fictions.
Lilith: Yes, they say something about that they don't own any of these characters, like in this particular case, the character making is due to Madam J.K. Rowling and Monsieur James Patterson. And that we don't own anything in this story, besides the plot, of course. By the way, you want to say it?
Kiki: But you just said it…
Lilith: Really? Oh right. Can I make a statement to free me from your clutches?
Kiki: Sure, but in complete sentences without using the letter "A".
Lilith: What?!?!?!
Kiki: Come on…you can do it!
Lilith: okay… "I beg of you f. fiction lovers to, um, ring the police to help me, um, run from this extreme person who took me from my home. I would welcome it if you did this for me. The, um, position I'm in is…." Dang, you address has at least seven A's in it!
Kiki: I'm craftier than you think.
Lilith: Kiki! The fan fiction!
Kiki: Right!
Everything was calm and normal at Hogwarts that April afternoon. The sun was shining, the grass was green, and the Whomping Willow was attempting to slam students as they ran nervously across its section of the Hogwart's grounds. Meanwhile, at the Quidditch field, Harry was busy tying Ron to his Firebolt.
"Are you sure this will work, Harry?" Ron put in an effort to sound positive, but there was a slightly tense note in his voice.
"Don't be silly, Ron. Of course it will!" Harry smile was rather sinister, "This is a sure way to get rid of your recent fear of heights. I'll tie you to the broom; you rise, freak out for a while, and realize that heights are nothing to be afraid of. You can't fall, because you're tied to the broom, and if you want to go down, just yell and I'll come up with your broom! Understood?"
Ron gulped, but said nothing. He remembered some of Harry's other brilliant plans; ding-dong-ditching Hagrid, putting a dung bomb in Dumbledore's boxers, giving Ron a polyjuice potion to turn into Malfoy and make out with Snape. The last one was Ron's personal favorite, although he kept this a secret that was locked deep in the bottom of his heart, and never told anyone.
"Okay, the knot is tied. Have fun!" Harry let go of his broom and it whizzed up so fast that Ron was a trembling blur.
Ron closed his eyes as he felt himself flying, but curiosity got the better of him and he looked down at Harry, who looked like an ant right now. The grounds are so fascinating, thought Ron, from 100 meters high.
That's when Ron panicked, yelling loudly, "100 METERS HIGH?!?!?!"
"HARRY!!! COME UP HERE AND BRING ME DOWN!!!!" Ron screamed at the top of his lungs.
"What is it, Ron? I can't hear you!!!" Harry suppressed his evil cackling for later, and attempted to put a confused expression on his face.
As a matter of fact, Harry heard Ron quite well; many other students were curiously watching the screaming, crying, red shape whiz and swoop upward and downward across the school grounds.
"Mr. Potter! What in Merlin's beard are you doing to Mr. Weasley?" Professor McGonagall, who just came to the scene, was not exactly in the mood for pranks at that particular moment.
Harry gazed innocently into McGonagall's red face, "Oh, lovely day, isn't it, Professor? The sun is shining, the grass is green, the Whomping-,"
"Stop quoting from the fan fiction! Now, explain immediately!"
"Uh, well-,"
"Harry, I'm…going to…puke…" Ron yelled weakly from the sky.
Now, it turns out that Ron Weasley was flying by where Professor McGonagall and Harry were standing, and when he was right overhead, his stomach release its contents.
"Protego!" cried Harry, who had fast reflexes, and all the barf that was supposed to land on Harry bounced off and landed on McGonagall, who received her own share of Ron's partially digested lunch as well.
"Holy %$#, Ron, you mother-*$%#%$# little &^%$*#!!!" The female professor was being so profane that Harry's mouth hung wide open, as well as the other students. Colin Creevy, who updated his camera to a video camera, was recording the McGonagall's unexpected outcry.
"I can't %*$$ believe you DARE upturn you stomach upon my &%$^&^% NEW ROBES!!!!! You know how EXPENSIVE robes are these days? Go &^*# you're %*&^#$ &$%#^&!!!"
Harry was thinking of an escape plan when there was an explosion overhead. A bam, a crack, a scream. Everyone slowly turned their heads toward the sky as one…
"Okay everyone, here's the plan!" Max announced, pleased about flying in the warm spring air.
"Oh no, another plan," Total groaned from the arms of Fang, "I hate your plans."
Fang looked at Max, "Just tell us were we're going,"
"We are currently passing over England, over some countryside, I think. There's this huge abandoned castle over there," Max reported stiffly, suppressing all temptation of ripping off Total's head.
"You think we can blow it up? Nobody will mind," Iggy lit up and turned his head toward Gazzy, who grinned.
"No!" Max objected, "No blow-,"
They were gone.
"Oh crap, let's go get them," Max nodded her head toward the haunted castle.
Once again, Fang was being useless, taciturn, and so incredibly hot. Max hated him so much when he was like this. She just wanted to grab his shirt and-
"Max, it's a castle, right? Like, a real castle?" Nudge dived down and asked from between Max and Fang as they leaned down toward the colossal building, "I've always wanted to be in a castle! Like a real princess! Wouldn't it be nice to be one? I would rule an entire kingdom! Every morning, I would get a billion sausages for breakfast and for lunch, a HUGE sandwich, and a huge sone and dinner will be so big that I would be stuffed! And then-,"
"Nudge? I hate to be blunt, but there's something I must tell you,"
"What?"
"SHUT UP!!!!"
"You think my talking is a big problem?" Nudge was rather hurt, thought, I will not mention what you and Fang were doing last night!
Angel, who was listening to Nudge's thoughts, raised her eyebrows and stared at Nudge. She whispered, "Really?"
Nudge nodded.
"They did all of that while we were asleep?" Angel looked at Max and Fang unbelievingly.
"Yeah, even the last part. I didn't think a contortionist could do that, but I guess the messed up genes make us more flexible," Nudge experimentally tried to grab her ankles from behind and succeeded in doing so as she dropped 30 feet.
Nudge chucked darkly to herself, fingering the video camera in her pocket, As soon as I can get onto Fang's laptop, I'll be selling what's on my video camera for so much money, then I'll buy this old castle, fix it, then have Edward Cullen come here every day…yes, soon my plan will work! All I need is money…I need money…I will be so powerful! I will be unstoppable!
"Mwah ha ha!! I will rule the world!" Nudge didn't relies this was out loud until she noticed Max was staring at her.
"Nudge! Are you talking to yourself again?" Max knew that when Nudge was acting creepy, it was a very grave matter. The last time… Max shuddered, she didn't want to think about it.
"Um, uh, look, there they are!" Nudge, trying to distract Max, pointed to Iggy and Gazzy, who were flying in a tight circle.
"Hey! You guys!" Max waved to them, but when they looked up, they looked alarmed and scared.
They were looking behind Max, pointed, and yelled. Max turned her head to see what they were making a huge fuss about.
Then they collided.
Ron was terrified a minute ago, and then he must have died; he was seeing angels. One blonde teenaged girl, two teen guys, one with jet black hair holding a dog and one with luscious reddish- blonde hair, with a little dirty blonde kid who could be in 2nd grade, and a dark ten year old girl playing tag with an adorable blonde kindergartener whose curls bounced when she laughed. All of them had wings, magnificent wings.
That was before he crashed into them.
Then he thought he was seeing things, because you can't crash into an angel, right?
All six of them fell. Amazingly, he managed to crash into all six of the flying ones, so seven mostly humans, a dog, and a broom fell from the sky into Hogwarts.
And as amazingly as Ron hit all six of them, all of their wings were injured on some way or another, so they couldn't fly. Also, when they saw the large crowd looking at them, they had the sense to tuck in their wings, since they couldn't use them anyway.
Ron heard Professor McGonagall yell a spell out, but he was too tired to hear it. They didn't hit the ground, but slowly floated onto stretchers.
"Take the Muggles to the hospital wing. We'll fix them up and send them to St. Mungo's," the professor said.
"What the hell is St. Mango's?!?" Total yelled from the depths of Fang's jacket, "And what the hell is a Muggle?!?"
"What's going on?" Nudge sat up, winced, and decided to lie back down.
"Is St. Mungo's another version of the School?!? You're not taking us back!" Iggy's arms and one of his legs were broken, but he still attempted to run. Professor Flitwick, who also came to the scene, yelled, Petrificus Totalus! Iggy stiffened and fell on the ground, experiencing for the first time in his life a full-body bind.
"Hey! What did you do to Iggy? Let me GO!" Max jumped up and ran. Professor Flitwick raised his wand and yelled, "Stupefy!" Then Max fell to the grass, all was going black…
Kiki: Haha! I'm just getting started! Sorry it took so long, my stupid computer blocks it...I feel so confined...
Lilith: YOU feel confined?!?!?!?!?
Kiki: Well, see ya! Find out what happens next in the next chapter, which will be uploaded in few minutes!!!
