AN-So this story will be a telling of the creation of the greatest man ever, Barney Stinson. The path to becoming a suited up god who tricks girls into de-robing is a lot rockier than most people can realize. Starts off at the end of Shannon's betrayal. Remember that it is in fact Barney who retells this story in the actual show, so we can safely assume all the non-awesome details maybe got glossed over.
"I'm sorry, Barney… That whole granola business, that was just a phase… Greg is older, and successful. Plus, he buys me stuff." Shannon's eyes had a flicker of guilt in them, but it was gone in that same moment. She shrugged her shoulders and walked out of the coffee shop, leaving Barney alone with his anguish. Alone, crushed, and broke, Barney realized there was only one place to turn.
"Barney? What are you doing here?" Loretta Stinson hadn't heard from her son since he had gotten out of college.
"Mom, I need to stay with you for a while… is that ok?" His eyes were glued to the floor, his shoulders were sagged, and his voice sounded hoarse, as if he had been crying or screaming for a long time.
"What happened, Barney bear?"
"I… I don't want to talk about it, ok?" He looked up at his mother, and she could see that his eyes were bloodshot.
"Of course, sweetie. You know there's always a racecar upstairs with your name on it."
He avoided eye contact as he pulled his bag into the house and wordlessly went up to his room. Loretta sighed as she watched her son walk up the stairs. She found herself thinking about the last time she saw one of her boys so devastated. James had come home broken when he left his girlfriend, finally deciding to come clean with himself about his sexual orientation. The only comfort in his world had been an understanding mother. After a few months he had pulled himself together, but it had taken a lot. Her promise not to tell Barney had been easy, neither her nor James had heard from him for over a year. She sighed as she began to wonder what had happened to her adorable little boy.
"Sweetie? Are you up? I made you a caramel sundae…" Since coming home, Barney hadn't come out of his childhood room in three days. If he was going to open up, Loretta realized she may have to do a little pushing.
"I'm not hungry, mom." The voice from behind the door didn't sound any better than when he had first arrived. Loretta knew that it was time for a little tough love.
"But it's caramel! That's your favorite!" Tough love was not one of Loretta's strong suits.
"I don't want it! Ice cream can't solve everything, mom!"
"Sure it can, sweetie! Remember when you got up the nerve to ask that girl Justine to the prom and she stood you up? I took you out for ice cream and everything was all better!"
Barney threw open the door and glared at her. "No, it wasn't, mom. She crushed me and I spent my prom night at Carvel with my mother. It was the most embarrassing night of high school!" He slammed the door, leaving his mother with a confused look of hurt. The door flew open and Barney quickly snatched the ice cream, slamming the door behind him again.
A sad groan came from behind the closed door. "Mom, there's no sprinkles on this!"
"I can run down to the store and get some! I'll be right back!"
The door opened, slower this time. "No… sprinkles aren't gonna help…"
"Are you sure? I can get rainbow and chocolate and you can mix them together…"
"Mom. Just stop. Can… can we talk?"
"Of course we can, my sweet little boy."
"And that's the whole story. She left me for some guy because he had more money than me."
"Oh, Barney… She just wasn't the one."
"Yes she was! I … I was gonna marry her one day, mom…"
Loretta sighed. "Believe me, honey. Just because you marry someone, that doesn't mean they're the one…"
Barney put down his empty ice cream goblet and shook his head. "I just feel like…. like maybe there's no such thing as 'the one'…. you know?"
Loretta reached over and put her hand on her son's knee. "I know what you mean…I thought that for a very long time. But after your father left to be on TV, I realized I had something better. I had two wonderful babies who were much better than any 'one' I could ever find."
Barney's head shot up with a glimmer of hope. "So I just need a kid?"
"No, sweetie. I just mean that the 'one' doesn't need to be a partner. You need to look inside yourself to find happiness, maybe…"
Barney stopped pulling on his ponytail as his eyes widened. "So…. I don't need to find someone to be with, I just need to find my own happiness?"
"I think that is a good place to start. You need to make yourself happy before you can worry about anyone else. What makes you happy, dear?"
Barney's face split into a sheepish grin as he picked up the empty ice cream goblet. Loretta nodded and wordlessly took it from his hands and stood up. As she walked into the kitchen, Barney leaned back and frowned. What makes me happy…
AN- Ok, just a quick setup here, trying to find the style for this story. Haven't written any fanfiction in like forever, so my mad skillz might be just a bit rusty. Anyhow. If I screwed anything up, (or if you like), please leave a review. That'd be awesome.
