Disclaimer: CSI New York and its characters are the property of Jerry Bruckheimer and CBS. No infringement is intended, just pure fun.
. . .
The sickly sweet smell of blood was almost too much to bear. The red pool on the floor was getting larger and larger with every second, despite Jo's efforts. It was sipping through her fingers and she couldn't do anything to stop it. In a helpless attempt at prolonging life, she pressed her hands to the wound with more pressure. She could feel the frantic thudding of the heart against her palms. It felt almost like her fingers were touching it directly.
Someone called her name. Again and again. The voice was so distant, as if it was coming from behind the brick wall. And it was easily drowned out by the shaky whisper.
''Am I going to die?''
''No, darling, no... You're gonna be just fine.'' Jo said soothingly. Her words would had better effect if not for a big, round teardrop that was slowly rolling down her cheek.
''I'm scared.'' The girl complained brokenly.
''I know.'' Jo whispered back, fighting the urge to stroke her brown hair. But she couldn't do that, she needed both her hands on the wound. Instead she just locked her eyes with girl's hazel ones.
Those eyes... They were eyes of the complete stranger. Yet they were so oddly familiar. Is this how her eyes looked like at that very moment? Widely opened with fear and glossy with tears? It was impossible not to notice in her eyes the struggle she put up for every single breath. Silent battle that was condemned to be lost anyway.
And then it just happened. Almost peacefully. She took a sharp breath that didn't leave her lungs. Her eyes were misted over with a haze. Wide opened, but unseeing. And there was no thudding in her chest anymore. Everything went still. Everything went silent. Except of the resounding 'no' in Jo's mind.
That was it. It was over. Now all she needed to do was stand up, wash away the blood from her hands and keep working like nothing happened. Then go home, eat dinner. Wake up next morning, look up at the sun, hug Ellie before she left to school. She wasn't supposed to think that someone's life had just fallen apart, that for someone this date from now would be nothing but a painful anniversary. That since now someone's heart would be torn apart, not being able to feel anything else, only to pine away. But she? She was supposed to carry on.
Jo closed her eyes slowly, trying to hold back tears, but they rebelliously leaked out from the corners of her eyes, dropping down, mixing with the fresh blood.
She couldn't bring herself to pull away.
. . .
Mac's pen hung in the air before hitting the paper he was just about to sign as he glanced at the date. For some reason he couldn't keep himself from making a quick calculation in his mind. It was his groove now. He didn't count days from the beginning of the month like normal people. Or counting them out to the upcoming weekend. Or the next paycheck. Instead of that he counted them from that day.
Today it was two months and five days. At first he had thought it would get better the next day. Then, when a week would pass. A month. He couldn't quite recall the moment in which he had realized that time didn't have any healing power with this one. It seemed like it had happened only yesterday.
How could it be any other way when they were cutting the same wound open every single time they were looking at each other? Slipping into the delusion they both created, deeper and deeper. Like they were taking part in some silly contest, pretending so hard in front of each other that they were doing just fine. That nothing had changed since that day.
Every time he thought about it, he got mad at himself. For letting that conversation took such a turn. For not speaking his mind, for bogging down in mistruths. For uttering some ridiculous statements none of them wanted to say or hear. And for letting her do the same to herself.
She told him he had been her sweetest downfall. If that was it, then she was his most blissful sin. And he knew there was no chance for him to be given absolution, because he didn't repent of it. Not at bit.
The smell of her hair, the taste of her mouth. The feeling of her skin against his. The arching of her back, the breathless moan... The list of his sins was incredibly long and he didn't regret any of them. The only thing he did, was the one he hadn't done. That he hadn't stayed with her that night.
It seemed that every sinful soul, before being damned forever, should be allowed to get the taste of heaven. Only then the suffering would be painful enough, with the knowledge of what had been lost.
It looked like he had ruined something before even starting to actually build it. He had let her slip from his embrace in the most foolish way. He had managed to make her open up to him. For a short while all her guards were down. But now they were up once again. And he knew that this time she had made sure nobody would go past them.
Now her every word was carefully weighed. Her every gesture well thought out. She was incredible in reading people, she knew what could tell away too much. Only now she wasn't using this knowledge to get closer to him like before. Now she was using it to make him stay away from her.
She wasn't showing any signs of her anguish. Nobody would ever guess something was wrong. If not for her break down that night, he wouldn't either.
She let herself being consumed by grief. She gave in to despair. He knew very well how easily it could happen. And how hard it was to bring oneself back. He would do anything to save her from experience what he had himself. If only it wasn't too late for it already...
The ringing of his phone pulled him abruptly out of his thoughts.
''Taylor.''
''Mac, you have to come to the crime scene. It's... it's Jo.''
. . .
A/N So as you easily figured out, this is a continuation of "A Day In Between". I have to admit I don't know yet if it was a good decision to continue, I can only hope. We'll see.
Any opinion will be treasured. As always. But even more this time.
