Someday
We'll Know.
Someday We'll Know, sung by Mandy Moore and Jonathan Foreman.
Based of from Final Fantasy VIII, produced by squaresoft.
Well, as much as I'd like to ignore the relationship between Seifer and Rinoa, I can't. It'll always be there… So I figured I'd better get this outta my system. Basically, Seifer and Rinoa are not in love, but they still think about what they had… a bit angsty, considering the way I interpreted the song, but it's not bad… Actually, I have to warn you, I applied the song in a very dark manner towards the end. Read on!
************************************************************************
Ninety miles outside Chicago
Can't stop driving I don't know why
So many questions.... I Need an answer
Two years later your still on my mind.
Rinoa Heartilly strolled through the streets of Timber, arm in arm with her knight. She was excited, at first, to be able to visit the town that she fought to protect, the place that she considered a second home. But Rinoa seemed preoccupied with something. Her usual, knowing smile, was replaced by a somber frown.
Squall glanced over to look at her. He could tell that something was wrong with her. They walked along quietly for a moment before either of them said a word though.
"Why so quiet?" Squall asked with concern.
Rinoa gazed over at him quickly, shaking her head.
"What?"
Squall looked at her with a raised eyebrow.
"…You seem… " Squall paused. "…Upset… are you ok?"
Rinoa seemed to forget her troubles for a moment, smiling up at the man she loved. Even after two years since their meeting, it still gave her such a thrill when he showed some genuine concern for her.
But her mind soon turned back to their previous thoughts.
"…I want to tell him what's on my mind… Oh, I want to just blurt it out so badly…"
Rinoa gave a saddened sigh.
"…But I don't know. Could he handle it if I told him that, even after three years apart… I'm still thinking about Seifer…?" Rinoa looked up at Squall, half-expecting for him to give her an answer. 'Yes Rinoa, I'll understand'. Rinoa giggled to herself at this.
"…How would he take it?" she wondered. "…I love Squall so much…" she thought. "…I don't want him to get the wrong idea…"
She tugged a little harder on her Knight's arm, reassuring herself of his affection for her.
"It's just that… There's so many things that I wonder about… what happened between me and Seifer that summer… What he almost did to me on that God-awful Lunatic Pandora…"
Rinoa stopped walking for a moment. Releasing Squall's arm and sitting down on a bench to give her legs a break, she rested her chin in her hands.
"…Why?" she thought. "Why did we leave each other's lives… Why did he join that horrible sorceress…?" Rinoa sighed at the irony of her next thought. "…I thought that we were in love… What happened?"
************************************************************************
Whatever happened to Amelia Airheart?
Who hold the stars up in the sky?
Is true love just once in a lifetime?
…Did the captain of Titanic cry?
Seifer Almasy sat on the dock of a seaside town's harbor. He scratched the stubble on his chin with irritation… It'd been a few days since he'd been able to shave, but he ignored the task since he would be leaving Balamb soon anyway.
Seifer had been drifting from town to town for the past year or so, making as much Gil as he could, here and there. He mostly hired himself out to fight away monsters, but he took almost any job.
He traveled with his friends, Fujin and Raijin, and they made a decent living. It was a bit stressful, but they made enough to keep themselves fed and warm. But more importantly, they worked to keep themselves on the move.
The former SeeD cadet thought about the huge mistake he'd made two years ago. What he did, and what it had cost him.
"Hell, what it's still costing me…" he thought. He hung his head, letting the cool ocean air ruffle his blond hair.
Seifer had become more and more dejected in recent months. He didn't know, or even care what direction his life was taking anymore. At times, he thought that he might be struggling with depression… But even in such a despondent state, he couldn't imagine himself weakened by something so intangible. He couldn't accept it.
Seifer had tried for so long to forget what brought him down this road. His alliance with Ultemecia was an aspect of his life that Seifer wished time and again that he could take back.
"Why'd I do it?!" he thought angrily. "…Just to be some bitch's godamn gopher…" Seifer turned his head away from the watery reflection below, ashamed at his own face.
"'Sorceress' knight'… yeah, right." he said sarcastically. He thought about all the things she'd made him do. The torturing, the murder, the lies and deceit. There was one thing Seifer regretted especially… What he'd done to Rinoa Heartilly.
"How could I have let myself come that close to harming her…"
He raised his head again and screamed.
"God-dammit!!!"
Seifer took a few deep breaths, and calmed himself down. So many questions ran through his mind, he felt as if it would just stop altogether.
"…Damn… I loved her… or I thought I did…" Seifer began. "…Didn't I? …Why didn't I stop myself…"
Seifer couldn't even excuse himself for the fact that Ultemecia was controlling his mind at the time.
"I knew damn well what I was doing…" he thought. "…That whore was just feeding of my own damn ego… She knew that I felt that power, and liked it. …I would've sacrificed anything to keep that power…"
Seifer slammed his fist into the concrete beneath him.
"…And she knew it." he thought. "…Why'd I let myself sink like that? Why…?"
Seifer sighed, and hid his face in the sleeve of his tattered trench coat. It smelled a little dirty, but he didn't care. He simply thought about the futility of his questions.
"Might as well ask what the meaning of life is…" he thought. "…I'll never understand myself anymore… and it's all that bitch's fault… all of it…"
Oh, Someday we'll know
If love can move mountains
Someday we'll know
Why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know
Why I wasn't meant for you...
************************************************************************
Love is a funny thing. It's elusive, but also a very powerful force. Many times, it's mistaken for infatuation, and sometimes it's the other way around. The only way to tell the difference, is when either of those are tested to the extreme. True love will always bravely come through, no matter what. Infatuation, however, shows itself to be a horrible coward. It reality, the two, while apparently similar, are entirely opposite.
…But the pain from either comes in nearly identical forms.
************************************************************************
Does anybody know the way to Atlantis?
What the wind says when she cries?
I'm speeding by the place that I met you
For the ninety-seventh time... Tonight
"He doesn't even realize that we've been walking past the place me and Seifer met about a dozen times now…" Rinoa thought as she watched Squall sit down next to her.
"It was right over there, by the shop near those train tracks."
Rinoa gazed fondly at the place where she'd met Seifer. They'd made a lot of fond memories that summer.
"…I wonder if I'll ever be able to know why he did what he did… Even after everybody seemed to forgive him, he didn't come back to Garden…"
Rinoa felt her eyes start to water up. The thought of someone she cared about, even someone she knew couldn't even be friends with her anymore, turning down such a dark path, saddened her.
But Rinoa chastised herself.
"Why should I care about him?" she thought suddenly. "After what he did… and then he couldn't even come back and admit his fault…"
She sighed.
"…I'm asking myself too many questions… If I asked Squall, I know what he'd say… 'You just shouldn't worry about it'… Seifer made a decision to stay out of my life… I just have to accept it."
She looked over to Squall, who was still a bit perplexed.
"…Besides. My life is perfect now. I have Squall with me, and that's all I need… All I want. …Me and Seifer… It just wasn't meant to happen. But Squall… He's real. He's the one who came for me, who showed how much he loved me, even when he had to fight impossible odds…"
Rinoa got up, and motioned for Squall to follow her. She smirked knowingly, and placed a quick kiss on his cheek.
"The one I love…"
Squall blushed slightly, and brushed his hand through her dark hair. Rinoa sighed, suddenly feeling very content with her life.
"…Goodbye Seifer…" she thought. "…We'll always have Timber, I guess…"
"Com'on Squall…" Rinoa said with a smile. "Let's go home…"
Someday we'll know
If love can move mountains
Someday we'll know
Why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know
Why I wasn't meant for you...
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
************************************************************************
It's a lucky person who can find true love. Even those who wait patiently, faithfully, are never guaranteed to experience it. Once found, it is strong, and inviting. It's something to be cherished. But a lifetime of waiting for it can be just as potent, just as powerful… The difference is that the expectation of love has the potential to spur jealously, anger, and eventually hate…
Unreasonable longing for love can give one a very different, and very destructive outlook on life. It causes depression, and self-pity, both of which can lead to a resentment of those who have true love.
…The notion of love is the ground work for acts of both great good, and great evil.
************************************************************************
Someday we'll know
Why Sampson loved Dalilah?
One day I'll go
Dancing on the moon
Someday you'll know
That I was the one for you....
Seifer looked up to the sky. It was getting pretty late, but he didn't mind. He'd spent the better part of the evening in self loathing, just sitting on the dock…
"Fuijin and Raijin will wait for me…" he thought.
Seifer looked into the watery reflection in the water. He noticed the scar across his brow which he had possessed for the past two years… It was nothing more than a scrap from a training exercise.
"Damn Leonhart…" Seifer thought. His ego began to surface after hours of beating himself up.
Seifer had reflected on his past, chastising himself so many times before…But something was different now. His mindset was altering, unable to cope any longer with the mistakes of his past.
Though he was disgusted again and again by what his memories revealed… Seifer somehow began to excuse his sins this time. His pride began to twist the truth, justifying his errors… Seifer Almasy was changing… But not for the better.
"Rinoa would've been mine… Sure I messed up… but that damn Squall…"
Seifer narrowed his eyes. Everything in his mind started to make a sickening sort of sense to him.
"She should know that he's no good… Bitch." he thought angrily, spitting on the ground.
Seifer's thoughts became even harsher now. He felt an overwhelming, urging anger come over his mind.
"She'll know… Someday, she'll realize that I would've been hers. Squall had no right to take what was mine…One day, I'm gonna show him… show them both…"
I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow
Watched the stars crash in the sea
If I can ask God just one question
Why aren't you here with me tonight?
"I had power… I traveled to the ends of the planet for it… Hell, even without Ultimecia…" Seifer paused. "…I'm a damn good fighter… The best. I'm man enough for any woman …So…Why aren't you here Rinoa…? Why'd you choose that damn Leonhart…?"
Now it was night. Seifer watched as the stars slowly began appearing in the sky. He turned the thoughts over in his mind, becoming angrier, and more self-assured as he did so.
He knew and realized what he'd done. But Seifer was losing his sanity, his mind rationalizing, or ignoring everything he'd done wrong in his life.
"If Hyne above exists…" Seifer thought. "Why doesn't he put things the way they should be…? Why is Rinoa with Squall instead of me…? He knows, as well as I do, that she should've been mine…"
Seifer lifted himself from the ground, and drew out his weapon. He held it menacingly over the water, as if threatening the very elements.
"Well, they have there's coming…" Seifer thought. "It's only a matter of time…"
************************************************************************
Oh, Someday we'll know
If love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know
Why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know
Why I wasn't meant for you...
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
Rinoa buckled her seat-belt carefully, as she and Squall began driving away from Timber. What had been formerly known as 'Balamb' Garden was stationed just a few minutes from the small town.
"…One day, I'm gonna completely forget about Seifer…" Rinoa thought. "It's sad… but he has no place in my life anymore… Even now, I don't feel as emotional when I think about what could've happened between us… And I can answer that question, 'Why weren't we meant to be?' …Because Squall and I were… that's why."
Squall put his arm around his angel, keeping one hand on the steering wheel. Rinoa wrapped her hands around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder. There was no need to tell him about what had been on her mind, what she had seemed so preoccupied with… it was nothing more than a distant memory now.
She sighed with contentment as they drove back to Garden… Back home.
************************************************************************
Someday we'll know
Why Sampson loved Dalilah
One day I'll go
Dancing on the moon
Someday you'll know
That I was the one for you...
"He'll pay… He'll pay every last bit and more for what he did to me…"
Seifer called out his threats over the ocean. He didn't care who heard him.
"…He's taken more away from me than Ultemecia ever could've… He made me lose… No, he stole, my pride, my dignity…"
The trench coated figure turned around quickly, gazing away from the water.
"She'll know that I was the one for her… She'll be sorry that she didn't come for me..."
Seifer laughed ominously to himself.
"And Squall… I'll attack him where it hurts most…"
Seifer swung his gunblade around frantically.
"…His heart."
************************************************************************
Both contemplate the relationship they had. One comes to terms with her past, letting it be just that. The other, however, struggles to keep his memories in their proper perspective…
Not my best work… and very angsty, but I'm trying to diversify, so I gain a larger audience…(Ou, I'm so sneaky like that…^_^)
So, Tell me what you think.
P.S. My songfics all tie in, or at least agree, with a larger story. This one in particular is a hint of something much larger to come…
************************************************************************
