Title: Remedy
Pairing: Implied House/Wilson, implied House/Cuddy, implied Lucas/Cuddy
Rating/Warnings: PG
Summary: Wilson is sick of House trying to make Cuddy miserable. Its okay, he has a remedy for that.
Spoilers: WARNING, SPOILERS FOR SEASON 6!
Notes: Its been a year since Ive posted on here. I'm utterly exhausted from work and class. Here's something to show that yes, I'm alive. I'm taking a year off from school to catch up with everything else, so prepare for updates in 2010.
Disclaimer: I don't own House MD or any of the characters.
"I know what I'm going to do about the Cuddy and Lucas problem."
Wilson sighed under his breath and continued his trek through the hospital lobby, reading over the pink slips clutched in his currently cold fingers. He silently berated himself for not wearing at least a light pair of gloves to keep out the slight chill of the autumn that was moving in fast in the Jersey neighborhood.
"Wilson?"
Oh, right, House, Cuddy, Lucas, threesomes--
Wait.
Nevermind.
"And what do you plan to do about the Cuddy and Lucas problem?" Wilson marched past the counters loaded with ringing phones and stacks of manilla folders, House hot on his heels.
"I'm going to break them up," House replied cheerfully as he pressed the button to the elevator with the butt end of his cane.
Wilson paused as the words sunk in, and almost as soon as he realized what those words meant, House had already taken refuge inside of the elevator that waited patiently with doors opened with the help of a cane.
"Wait, what?"
"I'm. Going. To. Break. Them. Up." House repeated, all too cheerfully yet again.
"Why?" What else could he ask? It was the only thing that was intelligent sounding to him at this point other than 'Are you insane?', which he didn't want any answer to when it came to House.
"It'll solve my problem involving them being a couple." House poked the desired button with the butt of his cane again and leaned against the back of the elevator next to Wilson.
"And them being a couple would be--bad?"
House turned to him and gave Wilson a 'well, duh' look. Wilson rolled his eyes with exasperation and almost plowed over the incoming nurse just as soon as the elevator door opened.
The crippled doctor raced to catch up with him. "What, and you think that it's a bad idea?"
"I think you should just give it up, House. Leave Cuddy alone."
"I'd be doing her a favor--"
"By dropping it and leaving her alone," Wilson stuck his key into his office door and paused when House didn't say anything. He allowed his shoulders to sag before saying, "And no, House, I don't have a thing for her."
"I didn't say anything about that."
"I could hear you think it," Wilson snapped back and quickly unlocked his door, rushing in.
House limped in after him. "So you think that she and Lucas would be happier than her and I being together?"
"I think," Wilson slowed his speech, attempting to choose his words carefully, "that he could offer things that you couldn't."
"Like what?" House plopped himself onto Wilson's couch and made himself comfortable.
"Well, since you're asking, happiness for one," Wilson shrugged off his coat and hung it onto the hook carefully. "And two, he wouldn't be driving her to want to murder him for saying stupid things."
"Have I ever said anything stupid?"
Wilson gave House a look. House rolled his eyes.
"But really, I think it could work, all I have to do is find out what they're doing for Thanksgiving and--"
"No."
House raised an eyebrow. "No?"
"House, no. No more. No more attempting to woo Cuddy with your useless antics. No more driving Cuddy crazy with these futile attempts to get her to fall for you. No more, just--stop." Wilson waved his arms as he approached the couch. "Everyday it's something else that involves making her miserable, just--stop and leave her alone."
House glared. "Why? You going to stop me?"
Wilson made a bitter noise. "Yes, yes I am going to stop you."
"Really? How?"
Wilson placed his hands on either side of House's head and smirked. "Like this," and he leaned in close, pressing his lips firmly against House's.
It was new for Wilson, the rough bristles of House's stubble rubbed against his cheek was unfamiliar to him. The fact that the mouth he was currently ambushing was more harsh in nature, masculine, rather than the feminine and gentle that he was used to. The mouth tasted different too, and the tongue that suddenly invaded his mouth--
He broke the kiss and stared at House in bewilderment.
House panted for a moment before glaring. "You started it."
Wilson planted himself so he was perched over House's lap in a kneel and took a hold of the front of House's shirt. "And I'm ending it." He captured House's mouth again before the man could argure with him.
He knew that even if he couldn't stop the man from pursuing Cuddy, he could at least try to distract him.
But for what it's worth, this was a start.
