Second Best

'I've known Chihaya for longer, so why is Arata the one to hold a special place in her heart? Why can't it be me?' These questions haunt Taichi more frequently with each passing day.

He doesn't have to be a genius to notice that Chihaya actively chases after Arata's memory. Although she genuinely loves karuta, Taichi knows that part of her drive is attributed to her conviction that playing the game brings her closer to Arata.

"To me, Arata is like the God of karuta," Chihaya had once told Taichi, when the two of them were alone.

'How can I compete with a God?" Taichi wonders. Jealousy flares up within him. He blinks, taken aback by the intensity of this emotion. Unexpectedly, a memory of his mother flashes in his mind, her eyes stern and cold as she advises him to focus on things he can win.

Although painful to admit, Taichi realizes that he will never be able to "win" Chihaya's affections. He tells himself to move on, or rather, that he has already moved on. His girlfriend is sweet and thoughtful; however, she isn't Chihaya. Thus, his girlfriend doesn't know the real him, the part of him that is overly competitive and childish. Chihaya has seen these flaws and accepts him anyway.

Taichi supposes nobody would blame him for lingering on a childhood crush, especially when that person has made a recent reappearance in his life. While attempting to rationalize his emotions, Taichi recognizes the inherent hypocrisy in allowing himself to hang onto past feelings, while wanting Chihaya to let go of hers.

Karuta is the closest thing to a first love for Chihaya. Since Arata introduced her to the game, Taichi understands that separating the concept of love from Arata is impossible for her. Simply put, Arata gave Chihaya her first love, and thus nothing Taichi has to offer her can compare to Arata's gift.

'Becoming friends with Arata changed Chihaya's life,' Taichi reminds himself. 'I'm just lucky enough to have been the smart kid who could learn to play karuta well enough to tag along.'

Within those sunshine-filled, childhood memories, Taichi grasps that his presence in Chihaya's life has always been second to Arata's. When he and Chihaya traveled to Fukui to find Arata, the depths of Chihaya's sentiments for the other boy, as evidenced by the expression of longing on her face and the tears in her eyes, confirmed that this difference in caring still exists.

Being aware of the fruitless nature of his emotions does not make them easier to ignore. Even now, Taichi knows that a special place in Chihaya's heart belongs to Arata.

'I'll always come second to Arata where Chihaya's concerned,' Taichi thinks, realizing that being second best is really nothing special at all.

Author's notes: Normally, characters like Taichi don't catch my attention. However, he has such an interesting mix of characteristics. He's reasonable, childish, and honest at the same time, which lends to his relatability. (That, and Miyano Mamoru is Taichi's seiyuu. 3 ) I think that Taichi can't help the way he feels about Chihaya, but he knows she's still fixated on Arata. I feel so bad for him…

I hope you all enjoyed. As always thoughts and con-crit are welcome.

(Sorry if you're seeing this for a second time. I've had this up on LJ for a while... before this category existed here.)