Frank Longbottom sighed, looking around the quiet Gryffindor Common Room. Normally, he'd be surrounded by a few of the girls, some of the younger years, or the infamous Marauders – whom he was forced to share a room with. He snuggled down into his chair and sighed again, "Ahh – an afternoon alone with my favorite book. 'Broadway Musicals of the 1940's.' No roommates to bother me, how can it get any better than this?"

A door slamming stopped him, showing a grinning Sirius Black, "Oh hey Frank!"

"Hi Sirius," he grumbled back.

"You'll never guess what happened to me in the Great Hall this morning," he said, stepping closer, "This guy was smilin' at me and talkin' to me. He was bein' real friendly and – heh – I think he was comin' on to me! I think he might've thought I was gay!"

Frank shifted uncomfortably, clearing his throat, "S-so why are you telling me this, hmm? Why should I care? I don't care. What'd you have for lunch today?"

"Well you don't have to get all defensive about it," he said, looking a little hurt.

"I'm not getting defense!" he snapped, making him blink. Seeing his offended expression, he sighed, "Why would I care about some gay guy you met, okay? I am trying to read."

"Well I don't mean anything by it, Frank," he sat on the arm of Frank's chair, "I just think it's something we should be able to talk about."

"Well I do not want to talk about it, Sirius, so this conversation is over."

"But Frank – "

"Over!" he snapped.

Sirius sighed, "Well, okay, but just so you know…if you were gay! That'd be okay!" Frank blinked at him. Was he really singing? He was! "I mean, 'cause hey, I like you anyway. Because you see, if it were me, I would feel free to say that I was gay – but I'm not gay."

"Sirius, please, I am trying to read." There was silence for a few moments, during which Sirius stared at him until he snapped out, "What?"

"If you were queer, I'd still be here. Year after year, because you're dear to me. And I know that you would accept me too if I told you today 'hey, guess what? I'm gay!' but I'm not gay. I'm happy just being with you!"

Frank mumbled something to himself as James, Remus and Lily walked in, talking amongst themselves.

"So what should it matter to me what you do in bed with guys?"

Frank snapped his head to Sirius, who was beaming at him as everybody at the doorway stopped. "Sirius, that is wrong!"

"No, it's not!" he argued, pulling him up out of his chair and proceeding to dance with him. "If you were gay, I'd shout 'hooray!' And here I'd stay! But I wouldn't get in your way! You can count on me to always be beside you every day, to tell you it's okay, you were just born that way, and as they say – it's in your DNA – you're gay!"

"I AM NOT GAY!" Frank bellowed out.

"If you were gay!"

Frank ended with a loud 'UGH!' He turned and saw that Remus was on the floor, clutching at his sides as James leaned against the wall. Lily was on the floor as well, curling in on her stomach. Alice had walked in and was gaping at them.

"You're gay?" she shouted.

"No!" he shouted back.

"If he were gay!" Sirius said again with a cheeky little grin.