Sheldon Swifties XLVII: "Lets Do It…"

Summary: Like my Immortal Beloved bits in my Buffyverse stories, these are fragments and short bits, some longer…Just to fiddle with ideas, possibly forming longer tales later.

Disclaimer: All is Chuck's…

[To learn more about Charlotte, Amy's rather tragic if crazed sis, take a gander at my "Gran Mag" tale…]

Cheesecake Factory…

"So…What's the whatever?" Howard addressed Penny, pulling seat for Bernadette.

Raj's slight arch look…So whipped, dude…Withering under Bernadette's glare as Lucy nervously eyed her chair, waited, then started to sit, jumping back a bit as Raj finally moved to pull her chair…He acknowledging her grateful beam…

Ok, I'm an asshole and he's the frog turned to a prince…Apologetic look to Bernadette who nodded her acceptance of apology…

Howard watching the byplay, amused if somewhat nonplused…

Think I have to ask a few questions back home in bed tonight.

"Beats me…" Penny shrugged, setting down menus… "Amy asked me to make sure you all were here at dinner. Hey, Lucy." Warm smile…

"Uh…" vague wave…Forced smile.

"Penny…" Raj hissed.

"I know…Why is she smiling at me? Am I supposed to do something back?" return hiss…

"Just what you're doing…Don't worry." Hand pat.

Sheldon entered…Penny staring…Bernadette staring…

Lucy desperately trying to look at the walls, out the window…Oh, another one of them? How many are there and why do they all have to sit right together?…

"Look at you…" Howard grinned at Sheldon in the one decent suit, Penny's selection, he owned, a nice black and gray outfit.

"I know…Hideous…I look like a clown…" Sheldon sighed. "Is it clown night at the Cheesecake Factory?…'Cause if it is I'm dressed to win."

"Sheldon. If Amy asked you to dress up just once for a special occasion…" Bernadette began.

"Mmmnn…No, I can't blame her for this…" sigh.

Howard, glance to Raj…Hmmn? Raj, shrugging…

"Isn't Leonard with you?" Penny asked.

"He's with Amy…"

"Excuse me, miss? Are you working here or just out with your friends?" a middle-aged man, graying hair,standing, glared from his table near the group.

"Yes…I'm working here. And if you don't want me to mention to the manager that you're the one who left without paying last Saturday, you'll sit tight and this time show me cash or a working card before I take your order…" she glared.

"Take your time…" he sat back down…

"Sheldon…" she eyed him. "What's with the mystery? What's up?"

"Sheldon…" Raj, shrewd look… "Is this about Amy's sister? Is she still 'concerned' about you two? You're in the doghouse and had to do the penance dance, right?"

"Sister?" Lucy squeaked, looking round…

Not another one?

"I have no idea what you are trying to say Rajesh…" Sheldon stared. "But as to Charlotte…Amy fully understands I do not share Charlotte's affection for me."

"I doubt you even understand it…Nor do I for that matter…" Howard shrugged. "Just tell her she has nothing to worry that neurobiologist's brain about and never let Charlotte within twenty feet of you. I can recommend an excellent judge for restraining orders…Though you yourself are quite the connoisseur in that department. "

"Is that what this is? Are you doing something for Amy tonight, Sheldon?" Bernadette grinned. "Muy romantico…And long overdue."

"I agreed to assist Amy…" pained look. "Though under some duress…"

"Now I am interested…" Penny eyed him… "What's up here?"

"I made an unfortunate remark…But it was all Leonard's fault…" frown.

"Oh…Sheldon…" sigh. "You didn't say something nice about Charlotte to Amy?" Penny…Slight gulp…

"Of course nothing actually happened between you two…On your part…" she insisted...Eyeing him carefully…

"She's a dangerous person…My mother warned me about dangerous people like her…" Sheldon, shaking head.

"And…You took her advice, being our Sheldon and Mrs. Cooper's good boy…?" Penny, a hair anxiously.

"Are more people coming…?" Lucy whispered to Raj…

"One more at least, I hope…" Raj replied, anxious now.

"Sheldon? What did you do?!" Bernadette, impatiently. "You didn't make some stupidly honest statement about Charlotte being pretty or something?"

"Oh…If only…" Sheldon sighed…

"Leonard…" Penny turned to see Leonard, in tux…Carrying cello to the small stage where the keyboard and speaker system sat, currently unoccupied.

"What's with you?"

"Just a minute, Penny…" he put up a hand. "Sheldon? You ready?"

"I suppppoose…" Sheldon rose, pushing back chair.

"What's going on?" Penny looked from Leonard to Sheldon…

"You'll see…" Leonard grinned… "Sheldon?"

Drawn out sigh…

"What did he do? Is Amy mad?" Penny had hurried to Leonard, whispering…Pausing to bestow glare on the man who interrupted before as he glanced her way briefly…And returned to staring at his menu.

Heck, I was on call…I had to run and save a kid…The man sighed to himself. I sent a courier with the cash later…

"Mad? Hmmn…Maybe a bit crazy but not mad…" grin.

"So…Is this? Oh, my God did she blackmail him into a proposal?" Penny hissed… "He said something stupid and now she's got him on the mat?"

Uh…She winced at Leonard's look…Oh?

Something stupid expressed by one's romantic partner allow the partner to demand a marriage proposal?…Interesting factoid for future reference.

"Not exactly…He said the right thing…" grin… "Just wait…" He eyed Sheldon who clearly wished to delay his steps as much as physically possible…

"Come on, Sheldon…"

Uhhnnn…

"Whoa." Howard stared…

"Holy Krishna…" Raj gasped…

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph…" Bernadette, stunned…

"Amy?..." Penny blinked…At Amy in sweeping, glimmering black gown, minus glasses, hair flowing…

"Hello all…" nervous wave…

"Amy…You look…" Raj began…Openmouthed…

"Hello Amy…Nice to see you again, I hope you remember me." Lucy, suddenly…

Raj staring…

"…Rajesh's girlfriend…" slight glare at Raj.

Hmmn…He pondered…

Jealousy…Another magic cure to social awkwardness…

"Oh, yes…Hi."

"Amy! We're ready. Better come while I can still hold Sheldon down!" Leonard called from the stage…

"Amy? What is this all about? And you do look beautiful, honey…" Penny hissed, beaming at the end…

"Penny…I thought I explained my display of physical attraction to you bordering on nascient lesbianism was merely to divert you from Sheldon as I feared your interest in Leonard was a blind for a passion for the love of my life." Amy noted. "Please, I do love being a part of your incredible world but keep it in your pants, sister."

"Uh-huh…" grin… "So?..."

"Sheldon said the sweetest thing the other day…About Charlotte…"

"I knew it." Frown. "Amy, you know Sheldon. He can't help being honest and sometimes…I'm sure he didn't mean to praise her over…"

"What? He said she sang nicely that time with Leonard but he was sure I could sing the kabooties off her if I set my mind to it…" beam.

"And, courtesy of Leonard's generously helping me practice…Here I am…"

"Oh." Penny blinked…

"Nice. Wonderful. How good of Leonard…"

"Now…Don't be jealous, bestie…" Amy sighed. "We were chaperoned by Sheldon at all times…He being much too jealous of Leonard himself…" sly grin… "To allow us one-on-one…"

Actually, it's startling how much of a relief that is…Penny stared…

Hurrying to the stage where Leonard was tuning his cello…Sheldon stiffly standing by…Amy moving onto the stage herself…

"Leonard? Are you insane?" Penny hissed.

"What?"

"Humiliating that poor girl…Leonard…"

"Humiliating? Penny…" he frowned. "I'd never do that…"

"I've ever her sing, Leonard…And we all heard Charlotte…Come on…What were you thinking?"

"You just go and sit down…Or maybe not, your boss is out on the floor and looking your way…" he noted. "It's fine…"

"But…Leonard…I don't want her embarrassed." Low whisper… "Helping her's sorta become my penance for being a bully in high school. Don't ruin my standing as a good person with her and God."

"Penny…" he put up a hand, winking. "You've heard her sing but not to Sheldon…Trust me."

Howard staring at Sheldon at the keyboard…As Leonard took position on stage beside him with cello and Amy stepped to the mike.

"Thank you…Uh, Cheesecakateers. May your dinners tastiness compensate for the shortening of your lives by elevated cholesterol." Amy noted, nervously. "I am Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler and this is for my honey lamb…Gentlemen?"

"But that's why birds do it, bees do it…" grin to a frowning Sheldon avoiding her stare…

"Even educated fleas do it…" gentle touch on arm…

"Let's do it…let's fall in love…" pulling chair to his side and sitting…

"In Spain the best upper sets do it…" Sheldon, pensive look…

Hmmn…Suppose so…

"Lithuanians and Latts do it…"

Affirmative shrug…One can allow that they must do so…

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…" Rapturous beam…Lean of head on arm…

"The Dutch in old Amsterdam do it…

Not to mention the Finns…"

Lets not…Sheldon's look…

"Folks in Siam do it…Think of Siamese twins…" sly gleam and grin to his put-upon look…

Really? Siamese twins are your example?

Leonard grinning at the stunned Penny watching…

"Some Argentines without means do it…

People say in Boston even beans do it…"

Beans? Oh, now… Stare…

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…" suggestively seductive beam…

Something to be said for the principle…He shrugged…

"Romantic sponges they say do it…"

I'd want experimental verification…

"Oysters down in oyster bay do it…"

Undeniable, I suppose…

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…"

Oh, now that's…

"The inevitable conclusion, my sweet love…" Amy grinned, kissing him…Resuming, standing as Sheldon looked at her…

Uh, just a moment…We were occupied here…In a rather interesting discussion…

"Cold Cape Cod clams 'gainst their wish do it…"

Yeah, I'm thinkin' the same thing…Howard noted to a grinning Bernadette…

"But I don't know about Texas clams…"

"Even lazy jellyfish do it…"

Well, no one can accuse Mary Cooper's boy of laziness…Sheldon noted.

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…"

Ok…Penny grinned to Leonard…Sheldon pondering…

There is much to be said for the case as Dr. Fowler puts it…

"Electric eels, I might add do it…

Though it shocks 'em I know…"

Well, I suppose there is something in the notion of the joy that kills…Sheldon, waving to Amy to return…

"Why ask if shad do it…Waiter bring me shad roe…"

Her logic is flawless…Amy…Sheldon urged her back…She sat down again by him, arch look…

"In shallow shoals, English soles do it…

Goldfish in the privacy of bowls do it…"

And I've seen my bioluminent ones in Technicolor action…Sheldon nodded.

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…"

You have made a valid case for your side, Dr. F…

"The dragonflies in the reeds do it…

Sentimental centipedes do it…"

Logic dictates…He sighed…

"Let's do it, let's fall in love…"

"Mosquitoes, heaven forbid, do it…"

Now, now…No need to weaken the argument just when I'm nearly sold…Sheldon noted.

"So does every katydid do it…

Let's do it, let's fall in love…"

"Sheldon?" eager beam…

"Ok…" sigh, but warm smile…

Sheldon and Amy: (Amy leaning happily on his arm)…

"The most refined ladybugs do it…

When a gentleman calls

Moths in your rugs do it

What's the use of mothballs?

Locusts in trees do it, bees do it

Even over educated Physicists do it

Let's do it, let's fall in love…

Let's do it, let's fall in love…

Let's do it, let's fall in love…Thank you Cheesecake Factory!"

"Wow, Amy!" Penny hooted, clapping…

"Amy Farrah Fowler on vocals…Sheldon Cooper on keyboard…I'm Leonard Hofstadter…" Leonard beamed… "Sheldon? Amy?" he looked for them…

"Out the door, Hofstadter…" Howard grinned. "I'd say Dr. Fowler made her case."

"Ok…" Penny sat in a startled Leonard's lap… "So what are we gonna do for the encore?"

Uh…Well…He squirmed a bit…

"Oh, I know…I'll do that one from 'Rent'…" she beamed as he gulped…

"Too bad Sheldon isn't here…" Howard noted quietly to Bernadette as the gang eyed the couple on stage… "With his love of trains I'm sure he'd want to see a train wreck in progress…"

"So you never told me you were so fond of Amy…" Lucy frowned at Raj, leaning over… "Has he always been so fond of Amy, Bernadette?"