Hey guys! So this is my first fan fiction ever, and I am super excited to hear everyone's opinions! I intend to continue uploading so long as I have people interested in knowing what comes next. ^^
This story is set nine years in the future.
Also, I'd like to give a shout-out to Decodenprincess. Thank you for letting me use your artwork as the cover for my story! :D
XxKimi-Kill-HeartxX
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of the Bob's Burgers series.
"Louise, you get your butt down here this instant! I will not have my baby late for her college orientation!"
After hearing a disgruntled "coming", Linda stalked over to the restaurant, turning her frustration towards her husband.
"Can you believe her? She's eighteen now, Bob. It's time she started actin' like it."
Bob sighed and set aside the rag he was using to clean the counter. "Lin, don't you think you're being a little...over dramatic? She'll get there eventually."
The restaurant's door rang as Louise passively strode in and, leaning over the counter, she punched open the cash register. She proceeded to snatch up a twenty before hastily making her way back towards the door.
"Thanks for the lunch money! I'm off!"
Bob threw back his head and pinched the bridge of his nose, groaning helplessly. "Since when did lunch cost twenty dollars? And don't they provide lunch during the orientation?"
Linda snorted at Bob's disposition and walked over to the kitchen.
Louise, meanwhile, bolted down the sidewalk and towards the bus stop. "Hey Rudy, hold the bus!" She called a few feet from the corner of Ocean Avenue.
She grasped onto the street sign at the corner and spun herself to face the bus before leaping in, sitting herself right next to Regular-sized Rudy.
Rudy thanked the bus driver for holding the vehicle and pulled out his inhaler, taking in a large puff.
"Excited for college orientation?" He wheezed.
Louise and Rudy would be attending Seymour University. The majority of the kids who lived in the area chose to attend their local college because of the benefits that came from it. Anyone who attended Huxley High School automatically received admission into SU and tuition fees were lowered considerably for in-town residents.
Louise slid down in her seat until she was slouching. "Ugh, how can I be excited for anything school-related? This seriously bites."
"At least we finally get to move out, right? It's like a new-found freedom!"
Louise smirked and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well I guess not living where you work is somewhat of a plus."
"Come on, stay positive. We're gonna have the best time, Louise. Now, let's see..." Rudy sifted through his backpack and cinched it closed upon finding what he was searching for.
Louise rose from her slouching position to glance over Rudy's shoulder. For his age, he was still regular-sized, but he held about half a foot over Louise. She hadn't grown much, being a measly five foot two, but that certainly didn't mean she didn't intimidate everyone around her.
After some time, Louise spoke up. "Ugh, Rudy, quit being boring," She paused, now curious, "What the hell is that anyways?"
Rudy held out the booklet he was reading for Louise to see. Inside, there was a list of possible volunteering opportunities connected to the university. SU was, above all else, adamant on keeping up the image of "giving back to society" and "teaching morality to produce the finest graduates of any university". They had all students log forty hours of volunteer work for each semester, regardless of their major. Louise wasn't some mindless puppet, though- she saw right through their "charity project". She knew the main reason behind the program was to obtain funding, benefactors, and any other support. Seymour University was small, and despite its achievements, the university was often overshadowed by the bigger colleges surrounding it- no matter it's national rank. The volunteering was simply a means to gain extra attention- and money.
Some volunteer. Louise scoffed.
Just then, the bus lurched to a stop. Louise and Rudy slipped out of the bus and made their way towards the university's main building, coming to a halt at the sheer sight of it. The buildings were shaped with several eye-catching components in mind: cream, concrete walls; gorgeous, floor-to-ceiling windows with stainless steel lining; casual gardens embroidering the entrances; and an overall sense of paradise. It honestly felt nothing like college.
Louise and Rudy were quickly acquainted with their orientation leader who introduced herself as "Ms. Lettie". She giddily handed out packets full of information for the incoming freshmen and began orientation when everyone had arrived. Ms. Lettie used the packet as a go-to reference while walking the students throughout campus, eventually making her way to the service area reserved especially for the student body.
"Now this is the guidance counselor's office where you can come to vent any personal issues- we even offer free therapy to students!" Ms. Lettie clasped her hands in front of her and grinned inhumanly.
"Hallelujah..." Louise muttered under her breath, her arms crossed in annoyance.
The people around her snickered, causing Ms. Lettie to raise an eyebrow in confusion. Instead of addressing their behavior, however, she simply turned on her ridiculous stilettos and gestured toward the dormitories.
"Now let's show you bright, adamant learners your living quarters!"
Ms. Lettie instructed the upcoming freshmen to turn their "welcome packets" to page sixteen. There, they would find which building, floor, and room number they were assigned to.
After waving goodbye to Rudy, Louise made her way left towards the Seashore Dormitory. There were only two dorms- Seashore and Seaside. Seashore was large enough to hold the entire female body while Seaside contained all the males. The dorms were a subtle peach, palm tress surrounding them. Stone pathways led the students to either dorm and the various school buildings. The roads were brick, and, as one would expect, the beach was just past the Seashore Dorms.
Louise headed into her dorm and down the main hall. The lounge was literally like a summer resort. There was a bar to her left, a flat screen to her right, and potted palm trees decorating the entire room. The walls were entirely glass, with sliding doors to match. She could see that the doors conveniently led to the beach and the opposite dorm. In the middle of the lounge, the hardwood floor sunk in, creating a circular area filled with sofas, a glass table in the center, and comfy throw pillows that were various shades of pink, peach, and cream. On the back wall she saw there was a stone waterfall and scuffled over to it, gazing in awe at the coy fish elegantly gliding through the waters.
Louise then went past the lounge and to the elevator, pushing the button labeled "2". She walked down the second floor, and kept going until she found room 31. Using the card stuck to the last page of her packet, Louise swiped the key into the door and stepped into the room.
The room was styled similarly to the lounge. A cream, L-shaped couch sat in the corner next to the bay window, matching the sheer curtains. The bunk beds were to her left and the closet next to it. There were two desks already provided, and the view was gorgeous. Louise opened the bay window's latch and pushed the doors aside, taking in the ocean breeze. She was definitely going to like it here.
xXx
"Dad be careful with that box! It's filled with my lock-picking collection!"
"Louise, why do you even need a lock-picking collection?" Bob grunted.
Louise crossed her arms and scoffed. "Don't act like you haven't found it useful."
Linda popped her head into the room with a wine flask in her hand. "Bobby let's go visit Tina and Gene. I miss my other babies."
Bob set down the last of Louise's things before stretching his back and walking over to the door. "Fine. Louise, you'll be okay, right?"
"Yeah, whatever- go check on Mom. Your usefulness only goes as far as bringing in the boxes."
"Thanks, Louise." Bob answered sarcastically, his eyelids downcast halfway at Louise.
"Anytime Dad." Louise grinned.
After Bob left with Linda, Louise spent the next two hours getting settled, stopping when she heard the door 'click' open.
"Jessica! God, if I had to be stuck sharing a room with someone, at least it's you. I'd rather kill myself than dorm with anyone else in this dorm."
"Alright, alright. Thanks for the heads up, Louise. Now help me bring in my stuff, would ya?"
"Uh, have you already forgotten who you're dealing with? I didn't even bring in my own stuff- but I can get the twins to do it. They're like a pair of brainless monkeys." After texting the twins, Louise began to exit the room. "Come on, let's get something to eat."
xXx
"No. Way." Louise burst into a fit of hysterics, clenching her sides.
"Nice to see you too, Louise." Darryl muttered.
Darryl put down the sign he was carrying and adjusted his uniform.
"I'm so making this a regular hangout spot." Louise wiped a tear from her eye.
"It pays well!" Darryl defended.
"Uh, you're supposed to be an octopus- right?" Jessica cut in.
"Yeah, why?"
"I'm only seeing five limbs on that costume."
Louise immediately picked up on her laughing as she pointed at the back of Darryl's costume. "I think I found the answer!"
"Tammy's stupid chihuahua went all rabid on my ass and bit off a part of my costume...so yeah, yuck it up- I know I look ridiculous."
"Oh, you are way past ridiculous my friend."
"Please just go order something and leave me to my self-loathing Louise..."
Louise controlled her laughter as she walked into the beach-side restaurant.
"Dammit!"
Louise turned around and rose an eyebrow at Jessica. "What happened?"
"Andy knocked out Ollie with my desk lamp."
"How does that even-"
"I don't know, but you go ahead and eat. I'll see you back at the dorms."
Louise waved and went to order a slice of coconut cream pie, surveying the shack until spotting her sister in the back of the restaurant. She saw Tammy and Zeke sitting across from Tina and Jimmy Jr., and stifled a laugh as Tammy's dog gnawed on the rest of Darryl's uniform.
Louise slid into the booth next to Tina. "Hey, T. How goes it?"
"It-"
"Uh, I don't remember inviting a fifth wheel." Tammy interjected.
"And I don't remember your face looking like it was dragged against the asphalt. Tina, why are you even socializing with this overdone piece of crap?"
"You-" Tammy tried.
"You are done speaking unless you want that mutt you call a pet to be sent home, because last time I checked, dogs aren't allowed on campus!" Louise slammed her palms onto the table.
Tina spoke up. "It was actually Jimmy Jr. and Zeke's idea. It's a romantic double-date."
"Uh, no it's not," Jimmy Jr. corrected, "I asked you if you wanted to come to The Cove with us an hour ago."
"Yeah, Tammy here wanted to try one of them piña coladas. And lemme tell ya- these are sweeter than a glob of butter melting on a stack of wheat cakes." Zeke gestured to the piña colada, before downing its contents.
Tina leaned over and whispered to Louise. "I'm logging it as a date."
"Coconut cream pie, anyone?"
"Right over here," Louise told the server, "Thanks- and you can just put this all on that one's tab- isn't that right, Tammy?" Louise glared.
Tammy jerked into an upright position and nodded. Louise smiled, waved goodbye to Tina, and took the box of pie back to her dorm.
xXx
Tina groaned nervously. "Louise I don't think you can just punch someone for taking too long to order coffee."
"Sure I can. I've done it plenty of times before." Louise said, throwing away her empty, disposable tumbler.
"I think college is a different story…"
Louise rolled her eyes indifferently.
"Louise!"
Louise turned around and turned wide-eyed. "Oh god, nononononono-"
Andy and Ollie ran after Louise as she sprinted past Tina and towards her last class of the day.
"Keep away from me you crazy-" Louise let out a tiny "oof" as she crashed with something firm and, yet, soft. The collision sent her tumbling backwards onto the cold floor. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Andy and Ollie sprinting the other way the second they caught sight of her fall over- they obviously didn't want to be there for the aftermath.
Louise propped herself up on her forearms and lifted one of her knees, ready to chew out the idiot that got in her way.
"What the hell-!" Louise cut herself off, staring at the last man she ever thought she'd see there.
"Logan?!" Louise shrieked.
"It's actually Professor now, Four Ears." Logan mocked.
Louise got up, dusted herself off, and rose on the very tips of her toes, only inches from Logan's scowl.
"I would rather die than give you a title." Louise seethed, her fists clenched at her sides.
Logan simply crossed his arms. "Well you're going to have to learn to."
"What the hell are you even doing here?!"
"I graduated with a master's in business a couple years ago."
"Then shouldn't you be working under your daddy as some CEO-in-training?" Louise taunted.
Logan, however, didn't let her get to him. "Well, if you must know, I worked under my father for the summer after obtaining my master's, but all I did was sit behind a desk and file papers. He doesn't need my help at the hospital, so I decided that I'd take over when he retires."
Louise started to rub her temples in frustration. "Then why, of all places, would you come here, then? Your family is loaded! You could literally be sitting back and relaxing until your old man drops dead!"
"Retires," Logan began to fume, "and what does it matter to you?!"
"You're teaching my last class of the day!" Louise pointed to the front doors of the main business building.
"Well doesn't that just suck for you?!" Logan came closer. "I've spent my whole life feeding off of my parents' wealth. Every penny I spend from here on out is going to come from the hours I work- whether I'm teaching or running my family's business."
Louise stood there silently, and, quite abruptly, began laughing.
"Oh, how altruistic of you, Barry."
Logan moved in close to Louise. "Listen here you four-eared brat."
And just like that he backed away, straightened his tie, and erased any sign of contempt from his face.
"Good morning Mr. Alastair." Logan smiled emotionlessly.
Louise turned around and looked at the man in front of her. He had to be in his early thirties, with bright, hazel eyes and cinnamon-colored hair that swept carelessly to the side.
"Good morning, Professor. Who's this?" He gestured to Louise.
Logan looked from Mr. Alastair to Louise, and then back to Mr. Alastair. "Oh, she's actually one of my students. Mr. Alastair, meet Louise Belcher."
Mr. Alastair strolled up to Louise and held out a strong, confident hand. "Hello, Louise. I'm Ethan Alastair, the dean of this university."
"It's…nice to meet you…" Louise trailed, not sure what else to say.
What's up with this guy's smile? Freak.
Dean Alastair continued to smile warmly at her and, after nodding in acknowledgement at Logan, he turned and left for the main building.
Logan headed toward their class as well.
"Better catch up," Logan called, "you don't want to be late to class!"
Louise groaned, stalking over to her class.
"Louise! Over here!"
"Wha-?" Louise paled at the sight of Harley trying to flag her down.
Oh for the love of- Louise moved towards the stairs, hoping to hide in the back, but was intercepted by Harley.
She grabbed Louise by the hand and immediately led them to the front row.
She giggled annoyingly. "Good thing I caught you, right Louise? I heard that our professor is, like, super hotso we have to sit in the front."
Louise pulled at her arm, internally pissed off that, despite her terrifying persona, she always seemed to be the smallest or the weakest. Even airhead Harley was stronger than her.
"Harley, let go." Louise grumbled.
Harley didn't, however. Instead, she spent the rest of class either talking about her dreams of having her own fashion studio or how "dreamy" Professor Barry Bush was.
"Alright class, I thought I'd finish off by introducing your end-of-the-year project," Logan smiled sympathetically as the majority of the classroom groaned.
"I know, I know. It may sound like just a bunch of work, but trust me- it'll be a lot more fun than you guys think. Consider this project your final for this course. It'll involve each of you teaming up and selling your own concept to your fellow SU attendees. The group with the most profit by the end of the year gets the mystery prize. I'll see you all tomorrow."
Everyone began to file out, but Louise stayed put until everyone had left, not including Logan. He craned his neck to the side as he put away some of his papers.
"Need something, Miss Belcher?"
"Cut the crap, Logan."
Logan turned around and eyed Louise. She really wasn't the same kid from his teenage years. Sure, she pissed him off still, but she was also different. Louise was this sexy, confident woman that happened to look cute as hell when she was angry.
Hmph. If she wants to fight, fine. I hope she knows I'll be playing dirty, though. He thought mischievously.
"I don't know what you mean." Logan pushed off of his desk and leaned against Louise's- just inches from her face.
Louise suddenly felt unsure of herself. "Get the hell out of my face, Barry."
Logan cocked his head to one side, letting his bangs fall in front of his vibrant, blue eyes. "Why? Afraid I might take something?" Logan took a glimpse at Louise's ears and smirked when Louise held onto them protectively. "Eighteen and still wearing bunny ears, huh Four Ears?"
"That's none of your damn business." Louise shot at him, averting her eyes.
"Why aren't you looking me in the eye?"
"Because your arrogance is repulsive."
Logan stared at her quietly for a few moments. "Who knew Four Ears would turn out to be this sexy, young woman…" He trailed thoughtfully.
Louise immediately locked eyes with him, instinctively moving to sucker punch the conceited prick. Logan caught her by the wrist half-way, however, and pulled it behind him, causing Louise to topple over the desk and on top of his toned body.
Disoriented, Louise held her head and rose to her knees.
"Hm, I like this arrangement." Logan noted of Louise straddling him by the hips.
She flushed scarlet and immediately pushed off of him, pointing at him accusingly. "That was your fault you pervert- you caught me off guard! I could get you fired for that, you know!"
"Oh, like how I could get you expelled for your behavior towards me?"
Louise stared at him wide-eyed.
"You sunuva-"
"Careful, there, Four Ears."
Louise stomped over to him. "Listen here Logan. You may have leverage on me, but that just means we're both in deep water. You take me down, I drag you down with me."
"Well I guess we've come to an agreement then, haven't we?"
Louise scoffed. "Oh please. I plan on making your life a living hell. And that's a promise."
Louise turned on her heel and stormed out of the room, barely catching Logan's rebuttal before she slammed the door shut.
"I look forward to it, Four Ears!"
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