I'd like to say that it was because i needed a change of clothes that made me come in here. But the truth is, is that I heard him turn the shower on about 5 minutes ago and it sparked that interest in me again. He always spent so long in there, and if i listened really hard i could hear him sigh in content as the warm water rushed off his back. I could hear his fingers run through his hair, relaxing him. The sounds seemed so close and descriptive that I could nearly paint a picture of him in my head. A light thud sounded, and I knew he was using a hand on the tiles to keep his body upright, his head hanging down as the cascade weaved through his silky hair and over his eyes. Mouth open, I knew he could taste water, he let it pass around his lips and leave at his nose as it flowed over his face. His eyes were probably closed, but I could only guess.
It interested me how he spent so long in there, how he seemed to enjoy how the water made him feel. I can remember, what seems like a long time ago, counting down the hours until I could a get a good 20 solid minutes in the shower to just stand there and let the spray cleanse me. But now, all I can think of the abominable chore that showering is, how quickly I can get it done, what excuse I can make not to take one if not necessary, because what a complete waste of time that would be. I just get no pleasure from it, I couldn't care less how warm the water is, or how it makes my skin feel. I simply just want to get it over with.
During that thought I had mechanically made my way into his room. Such a silly waste of space, I guffed to myself silently angry for even letting myself see how he lived, looking at all his belongings on the table. Shards of paper that looked about 50 years old and probably meant nothing, especially to him. It angered me that he felt the need to hold on so much, why couldn't he just let go? I could feel my teeth wearing my lip and I suddenly wanted to march into the bathroom and rip down the shower curtain so I could tell him what a waste this all was. His room, his things, everything he kept from my human memory. Why would he want those things?
I realised why I had suddenly felt so angry, and I rolled my eyes. Every time I turned, that picture of him and I mocked at me from my peripheral. We both looked so happy, we look so...normal, but I'm way too far away from that memory to even want to think about what we lost. That was a lifetime ago... yeah...just leave it Elena.
I cocked my head to the side thinking I heard something a little more interesting coming from the bathroom, holding my breath for a few seconds I heard it again. A hushed gasp coming from the shower, I had heard it before and it wasn't because he stubbed his toe.
I could hear his breathing get heavy, his hand leaving the tile next to the shower head. I stood there silently holding my breath with my jaw dropped for what seemed like a movie unravelling in my imagination using the sounds that I could hear from the room next to me. I could feel something sparking near my abdomen and I didn't want to admit to myself that I hoped he was thinking about me at this moment and not about that damn Rebecca, or Caroline or any other girl who has tried to put the moves on Stefan.
I could hear another long drawn out breath come from his lips, water slipping off the air escaping his mouth, so wet and perfect. His hand had reached his goal now, and slowly he started pleasuring himself. Oh god. This is...hot! I could hear him lean his head on the hand that had now moved to the right side of the shower console, and letting a hiss escape him, he slowly started building. I don't know why but I started to imagine him doing the same thing while he looked at me, as I let the spray fall over the ridges of my breasts, panting as I watched him pleasure himself over the thought of me. I squeezed my legs a little, wondering how I started making myself a Stefan porno. But still I was frozen on the spot, listening to his soft moans from the next room with something stirring inside of me, needing to be quenched very soon before I joined him in there. My hand slipped down to my jeans and I ran a finger over the material that covered my most intimate parts. I couldn't help it, I imagined his hand moving there as he stroked himself, desperate for me. Wishing he could take me.
"Elena" I heard coming from the shower. It was so clear, the way he said it with a quiver, there was some need behind my name, and he pumped harder. My heart beat so fast after he said it and I slipped my hand into my jeans and began stroking my slick skin. God that made me so hot, was he thinking about the exact same fantasy as I stood here thinking about him, too? I didn't want to let myself care about whether he actually wanted me so badly or not, but then again that feeling came rushing through me and I stroked harder, feeling myself squirming because I wanted to come with him so badly, even if he didn't get to see me.
"Stefan" I let escape and I heard him stop. Shit!
He was still, breathlessly standing under the water, but I could tell that he turned his head to hear what I had accidently allowed to slip. I silently prayed that he would go back to what he was doing before I interrupted him. I should leave, I really should, I can't face him. Actually I think he would know exactly what I was doing here if he left the shower to inspect the noise he heard.
"Elena?" Crap!
I stood there for a moment trying to get my breathing under control and slowly, discreetly moving my hand out from my panties.
"Elena what are you doing?" he asked, and when I turned I was a little disappointed to see him wrapped up in a towel. But my eyes still raked over those amazing abs, his pecks, his chest, he was a walking work of art.
"I ran out of clothes, I was checking to see if there was any left from human Elena still lying around here" I quickly spat back, congratulating myself on my quick response to his question. But I knew he could hear my heart rattling restlessly like a bird in a metal cage. He wasn't going to miss the smell of my arousal or the way I said his name while he was in the shower.
I just...needed...to get out of this room!
"Anyway I couldn't find them so...whatever," I tried to walk past him nonchalantly; I didn't want to look him in the eyes because they always scared me. How much he knew about me, how much he knew I could still feel even though I had flipped my switch, I still felt the pull between us. I could never admit that to anyone, but he just knew.
"Wait" he grabbed my elbow as I walked past him. And I could feel the moisture from his hands, it was slick and it brought me back to 20 seconds ago when I was thinking about shower sex with him.
"What?" I asked back with a little too much relief that he didn't let me leave.
"I know what you were doing Elena" I looked up to him, and he seemed a little embarrassed himself that he had been caught thinking about me intimately. I didn't want him to, actually I hoped he always would. How could I even think that when I didn't want anything to do with anyone, when I didn't want to feel anything with well...anything?
I didn't reply but I could see the question in his eyes and I turned my head away from him. I couldn't answer his question and I didn't want to either.
I could feel him turn his body and his hand came up to stroke my cheek. Why was he doing this? I have done nothing to deserve his compassion. It angered me and I turned away from his touch, but his other hand turned my waist.
"You can't say it yet, but i know" he whispered, leaning closer to me and moving his hand to pull my hair behind my ear. I was suddenly really aware that he was still in his towel, wet and erect from moments ago. I tried not to look down, but when I did I noticed there was still a considerable bulge in between his thighs and I let out a shaky breath at thought of him so close to me this way.
"I..." stammering now I started shaking my head.
"If you can't say it, can I guess?" his voice was deep and provocative. I squirmed at the closeness of his hard body moving into me, his lips inches away from my neck, he dragged his fingers down the sensitive skin there and I shivered. I knew he could feel it because he swallowed hard and dragged them back up again to my lobe.
"You can't let yourself feel Elena, but you still want my body" he whispered like he had been through this himself, his lips grazed over the skin on my ear, and even though he was so close I still had to struggle to understand the words that he was saying over the blood rushing to my cheeks.
When I didn't answer he backed me up to the dresser, pressing his hardness into my thigh. I didn't pull away but I didn't encourage it either. I was so torn between what I was trying to remember about how I felt, to how my body was reacting to him. For the first time since I flipped the switch I wanted to feel something other than desire or thirst or a distraction. I wanted to feel every ounce of Stefan in the way that I used to , but I honestly couldn't remember anything about him except this gaping hole that was forming inside me as he looked down on me with those green emeralds
"You want me to touch you" his fingers never left my neck but now they were trailing down over my breasts, torturing me, slowly trickling down to my hip that was exposed. He ran the pad of his thumb over the skin there and I swallowed again. His eyes were still boring into mine, I wanted to leave, but I felt literally like my feet were planted to the ground.
"You want me to kiss you" his lips were so lose to mine now, if I moved even just a fraction they would be touching his and I know I would kiss him, I know I would get lost in him.
His mouth was opening and it looked like he was having a hard time stopping himself too, he stood a little taller which made are lips a little further apart but his forehead was pressed to mine and that seemed worse. Because his big powerful body was towering over me. And I wanted so badly to hook my legs around him and press my lips on his exposed chest. I wanted to taste his lips so badly, it made my mouth water.
"Could I...taste you?" he growled. fuck
I could feel my resolve crumbling, I could feel his tactic working, I wanted to feel more than pleasure with him, I wanted to call his name from the top of my lungs as I came, I wanted to do the same to him. To hear him say I was the only one.
"No" I pushed him off me, but his hands kept me still there. I didn't want to feel ever again and he was a bastard from provoking me into wanting to even try to turn it on.
"Stop Stefan" I whispered, pleading with me to let me go. His hands loosened and when I looked into his eyes, I could see he regretted what he had done. He stepped back and held on to his towel that had been shuffled around while he pinned me against the dresser. Without taking another look at me, he walked back into the bathroom. I could hear him, sit down, I could hear him sigh. I could imagine him with his head in his hands and I knew why.
I didn't want to examine why I knew, or why i felt the need to go in there, so I left. I can't feel, I don't want to .
It's so hard to write a believable reunion considering the circumstances on the show at them moment. I appreciate all reviews ,feedback and I also love ideas for new story ideas. Let me know what you think.
