I've been through a lot this past week and got a bit unmotivated for the other story. I wasn't feeling so fluffy. So this is what came of it. It's set about 5 years from the current point in the show, 4 years from when Eli would have graduated. I know it's short, but it's kind of setting the pace. Let me know what you think, your lovely reviews will really motivate me to keep going!

I moaned in my half-asleep state as I rolled over.

I felt warm flesh against me, but thought nothing of it.

In fact, it was more of a nuisance than anything.

Now I had to figure out how to make her leave.

It was just a hassle, really.

Upon my skin coming into contact with hers, the naked blonde lying next to me stirred, waking up only moments later.

"Morning," she murmured, smiling lazily at me.

I opened my eyes, glanced her over for a moment, but then closed my eyes again.

"It's not morning," I said simply, knowing it was well into the day by the way the light poured into my apartment.

"Oh, shit," she whined, "I'm late for class."

"Where, beauty school?" I mumbled, sighing and rolling over to my original position once more.

"Don't be a dick," she said bitterly, pulling the blanket from around me as she stood.

I sat up to pull it back, nearly glaring at her. "You didn't seem to care much last night."

"You're awful," she whined.

I never understood why in the hell girls thought whining was an effective way in getting what they want.

I missed being able to rely on her independence and no-nonsense attitude.

I missed the fact that she could read beyond a second grade reading level, and could hold a conversation that meant something.

I missed the way that when we slept together we made love. We didn't fuck.

And it meant something.

It meant everything.

I missed the feeling of her, the safety I felt when I was with her, and those heartbreakingly beautiful blue eyes.

I missed my Clare.

As the door slammed behind the stripper I had shared my bed with the night before, I really fucking hated myself.

I had the most perfect thing in the world, and I had fucked it up beyond repair.

Through the rest of our high school careers, Clare and I had been together.

I loved her more than I'd ever loved anything or anyone. Ever.

She was my everything, and I would have done anything for her.

I would have died just to ensure she wasn't in the slightest bit of harm.

I guess, in a way, that's exactly what I did.

I didn't die physically, but I was damn near dead on the inside.

After what happened, I knew I would spiral out of control.

I didn't know what I'd put her through in the process.

And it killed me to think that I would hurt her in any way.

So I left.

I didn't leave with her any kind of logical explanation.

Nothing logical was going on in my mind at that point.

Looking back, I knew what an idiot I had been.

A big fucking idiot.

And now I would never see her again.