Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars or Harry Potter. I guess that leaves me with giant strawberries…

Harry stared into the sunset over the lake at Hogwarts. The lake rippled as the giant squid surfaced the water lazily then flopped back in again.

Ron was sitting behind Harry feasting on sugar cubes. Harry was also helping him eat the sugar cubes munching on them steadily. Hermione watched them disdainfully sitting a distance away doing her homework.

Suddenly Yoda jumped out from behind the Whomping Willow, slicing Hermione and Ron into squidgions of tiny pieces! Harry had no choice but to run or Yoda would kill him too…

Harry ran wildly around like a headless chicken, somehow managing to zigzag his way into the lake. But before he could get past the shallows a shriveled up prune popped up in front of him! But wait… IT wasn't a prune it was Emperor Palpatine dressed in a potato sack!

Before he knew what was happening a metallic droid fired several shots at him, forcing him into the chair floating in the middle of the lake.

But luckily for him the giant squid surfaced at that moment, smacking him back to land. He was whacked into a lady with hair like cinnamon bun rolls. Winded, Harry lay gasping for breath on the ground. Then Princess Leia said dramatically,

"Harry, I am your grandma!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Harry screamed. For you see, it was a trap! Leia got Harry's attention so he wouldn't notice Han Solo and Chewbacca approaching him with a large net.

The net was leftover from fishing for the giant squid. Harry was tied up by C-3PO in pajamas before shipping him to Australia in an orange crate.

Little did they know that Fred & George Weasley were waiting for them with a bazooka, several Skiving Snackboxes and a paper aeroplane!

The aeroplane being the most dangerous object of them all! Even with this defence, Harry floated away to Australia.

Midway in his journey the orange crate in which he was locked blew open. Harry landed on a shiny purple platform where Professor Lockhart and Darth Vader were dancing with grasshoppers in grass skirts. Several banana skins lay nearby. Harry started dancing the Cha Cha Cha. But before he got halfway through the routine a GIANT strawberry landed on his head! The giant strawberry was drunk!

It started to sing Happy Birthday at the top of its lungs (if it had any…) all its juice got squeezed out and drowned Lockhart and one of the banana skins.

Vader let out a groan and started mourning the death of his dear friend Lockhart. Harry ate a bucket of spinach while this was going on. Out of the seaweed lying on the floor came a Gungan, bruised from his previous encounter with the giant squid.

"Meesa want my mummy!" Jar Jar screamed in despair.

"Me breathing too!" Cried Vader force strangling a random Jawa.

The Jawa made strangling noises before collapsing into a Giraffe shaped heap.

The Giraffe shaped heap turned out to be Obi-Wan and Darth Maul having an arm wrestling contest. Darth Maul was cheating by using the force. Obi-Wan suddenly pointed into the distance yelling, "Look, a bird!" Maul looked and lost concentration because the bird was a Hippogriff which captured him. Obi-Wan started chasing after the Hippogriff crying, "I still haven't avenged Qui-Gon's death yet!" But that doesn't really matter because…

Harry started doing the Hokey Pokey! Dumbledore apparated right into the middle of the chaos to see what was going on. A chessboard fell from the sky knocking him out.

"All's well that ends well!" Malfoy said joyfully stabbing Dumbledore in the heart. Snape became the Headmaster of Hogwarts and made everyone wear greasy black wigs in honour of him. He then ruled Hogwarts with a cheese fist and his pet snail Cesisphus for the rest of his life.

THE END

Hope you liked it. If you laughed at it then it means you did like it. Please read and review. There really needs to be a section for random stories out there…