{Disclaimer: I do NOT own Loveless!}
I sit and try to focus on my homework. But all I can think about is you, Soubi. Damn it! Why can't I stop thinking about you? It's difficult enough to focus when you're here. And now you're starting to effect me even when you're not around! You're so frustrating.
Like, the way that you act. You barely know me and yet you want to be so close! Your hands caress my face. Your eyes lock with mine, leading me to read you like an open book. But a book in a foriegn language. All the words are there, but nobody can understand them. I wish you'd let me understand you. . .
Then, as if it'll "strentghen our bond" you kiss me, so passionately. Which makes things more difficult. Because now, not only is my mind dazed but my body is confused too. When your soft lips on mine aren't enough, you pull me closer. So close that our bodies are almost one. But it's all done so slowly and gently. As though you really want me to enjoy it. So do you? Do you really care about how I feel when you do that? I highly doubt that you do.
Because after that, like your presence alone isn't enough to ruin me for days, you tell me you love me. Why, Soubi? Why would you do that? When you know you don't even mean it! "I love you" is like "hello" to you. If you really meant it you wouldn't just throw that phrase around like it was nothing.
But that's the thing. You don't mean it, do you? This is all just carrying out an order to you. Seimei says it, and you do it. Then again, it's not like I'd know anything about that type of relationship. I'm not the kind of person that likes to order others around. I think it's wrong. However, the people that just sit back and let others tell them what they should be doing are just as misfigured.
. . . .Whatever. It's not like I liked any of what you did anyway. As a matter of fact, I hated it. All of it! I hate it when you touch my face with your, stupid, soft hands. And when you kiss me all I can smell is cigarettes and dried paint. I hate that!
But what I think bothers me the most, is you. You in your entirety. I hate you, Soubi!
I hate that I love you, Soubi.
(A/N: Thank you for reading. I hope you liked it. And if you didn't, please tell me why, and what i could do to fix it so that this won't be as much of a pain to read. Thankies! ^^)
