Innocent: Sequel to Would it be Beautiful? Gaara's thoughts on the 'Hinata' Situation and the fears he hides.

Disclaimer: I do not own the song Hurt by Nine Inch Nails or Naruto. Thank you, come again

Lyrics

thoughts'

"talking"

Hurt: Hiding the Pain

I hurt myself today

To much noise and she would wake up..too much noise and she would cry, crystal tears rolling down pale cheeks, her pain was his pain...and...even if it meant being alone in the end..he couldn't let her down. Hinata was everything to him, his sun in the dark times, his star even a million miles away when he wasn't visiting Konoha. Gaara quietly packed his suitcase closing the drawer and slowly zipping the small black bag up. He was done.

to see if I still feel

I focus on the pain

His heart hurt..hell he hurt everywhere, the pain receding slowly, too slowly into a cold numbness as he tucked the covers around his frail angel, she whimpered slightly trying to snuggle into his warmth but he pulled away and she frowned in her sleep. Gaara retreated to the door, his eyes cathcing on the brown teddy bear. Gaara smiled softly..if anyone witnessed it they'd think he had surely cacked...or was having thoughts of death but no, his thoughts were on Hinata..and the bear.

the only thing that's real

the needle tears a hole

the old familiar sting

He removed the bear from the shelf gently and tucked it under his arm, closing the door softly behind him. Frozen to his spot his back to the door Gaara felt somthing stinging his eyes, somthing wet escaped one and he caught it on his finger. A tear. Gaara frowned at it then began walking towards the front door, past the kitchen, which still smelled of ramen noodles, past the living room untill he reached the door and furiously wiped another tear away. He was stronger then this.

try to kill it all away

but I remember everything

what have I become?

'Damn you Hinata...what have you turned me into?' Cold air hit his face, reminding him of how warm he had been holding Hinata.

my sweetest friend

everyone I know

goes away in the end

you could have it all

He was doing this to protect himself..to protect Hinata from the heartache. Why the hell was his heart throbbing?! He was doing a good thing, a damned good thing. He protected himself against the possibility that Hinata would realize the monster he was and leave, hating him forever, and protecting her from being scared and hurt. Everyone won damn it!

Then why did he hurt worse then he had ever felt even with Shukaku?

my empire of dirt

I will let you down

It wasn't physical pain..he had only experienced that horror several times..he was used to emotionally being hurt. He let his guard down, his shield against pain... and the Hyuuga girl had wiggled her way into his heart and here he was...

The wagon was ready for him, two black horses attatched to the wooden carriage and several of his guards waiting to depart. He ignored their bows of respect and climed into the wagon slamming the door shut, within minutes the carriage lurched forward and they were heading towards Konoha's gates.

I will make you hurt

I wear my crown of shit

on my liar's chair

He had lied to her...said he'd always be there for her..now here he was like a coward fleeing the city..fleeing her. Hinata stirred up so many emotions..so many confusing emotions. He kicked his suitcase beneath the seat and stared at the teddy bear. The black button eyes stared accusingly up at him. He loved Hinata Hyuuga..he wasn't stupid, but to be with her would only cause them both pain. It always happened..he could never hold onto somthing so..so perfect without having everything blow up in his face eventually.

full of broken thoughts

I cannot repair

beneath the stain of time

Gaara knew it was wrong but he hoped Hinata would be hurt..would cry over him, but eventually she would heal. Hinata had the amazing ability to jump back to her usual cheerfull, though meek self in no time flat. She deserved someone better..anyone other then himself.

the feeling disappears

you are someone else

I am still right here

what have I become?

Besides Hinata didn't need to deal with his problems, she had problems to deal with on her own, her family being the main one. Though if he ever heard Neji had laid a hand on her again...he's wrath would come down upon the jackass as if Shukaku were still within him. Konoha gates loomed outside his window, he could just barely see past the small, foggy window, past the driver the horses' heads the large gates opening. Fog made everything look blank beyond the gates, blank..cold..lonely. Just like his life would be when he returned to Suna.

No Hinata...it would be healthy for him. He was used to being alone..he did better alone then he did with companionship.

'But you want companionship..you want Hinata...' Somthing whispered making him angry, he threw the bear against the wall, the over-stuffed thing hit it with a thud, sliding down the wall. The black button eyes still bore into his own green ones and Gaara kicked it under the opposite seat.

Two days ride to Suna...and another hour before Hinata would be awakening. They were already ouside the gates and had already shut behind them. No turning back. The sun was rising...

my sweetest friend

everyone I know

goes away in the end

you could have it all

my empire of dirt

I will let you down

Meanwhile...

Hinata yawned, squeezing her eyes shut against the sun pouring into the room, grumbling lightly she curled closer to the other side of the bed, her hand searching for Gaara.

"Gaara?" Hinata sat up quickly looking around. Nothing. Jumping from the bed Hinata searched the house..again she came up with nothing.

'Maybe he is..at Tsunada's office...'

Trying to ignore the sinking feeling in her heart she returned to the bedroom her eyes avoiding the empty shelf the bear had sat at. Her hands moved over the dresser, sliding down, opening.

Empty, the other? Empty as well. All six drawers? Empty.

I will make you hurt

if I could start again

a million miles away

I would keep myself

I would find a way

'I will never return.'

Gaara thought, nails digging into his palms, he kept his sand away, feeling the pain, feeling his own blood flow freely dripping onto the floor.

'Never'

Innocent: I wrote this story in like an hour wired on three cups of coffee...-huge grin- It took everything I had not to throw some completely random...things that had nothing to do with the story in there..like I thought about making the teddy bear come to life when Gaara threw him against the wall and start cursing and screeching at Gaara...heehee Anyways..there will be one more story ending this small erm..story, just three one-shots tied together. Next story will be lemon-goodness. I'm trying to find a good song..I was thinking maybe pain frmo Three Days Grace? Any ideas for a good song? Welps R&R please and toss me some ideas! Oh here is a random thought..I was babysitting last night..and I watched Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends and there was this little yellow dude called Cheese..and the little brown haired dude woke up next to him and Cheese says in a really creepy voice "Faaather..." then later in the show he calls the blue-blob-thing "brooother"

Now think about it. Doesnt Gaara say "Mooother" to himself in that one episode fighting Sasuke? LMAO! Cheese and Gaara are like...twisted cousins! SO me being my chocolate-hyper-self ran around the house screching 'moooother faaather BROOOOTHER! It's a flippin' family-affair!" Yeah. Random. Damn coffee...Anyways..Au revior! Xx

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