Kim Yugyeom died at 3:35 in the afternoon.
The sun was shining from behind the clouds, the warmth from its rays striking the exposed skin of the numerous pedestrians out and about on such a cool October day. Yugyeom's last thought was how beautiful everything was. He was half way across the crosswalk, earbuds snuggly placed in his ears, the song he was currently enamored by blaring through the tiny speakers. He didn't even see it coming.
The cause of death was from a young driver behind the wheel of a brand new, sleek, dark blue sports car. It practically came out of nowhere, speeding around the corner of the street and straight towards Yugyeom. The impact killed him instantly.
That meant no final words, other than the 'I'll see you guys later' he told everyone before leaving the dorm. No real goodbyes. As well as no chance to apologize to Jinyoung over the egg soup he made for lunch.
The next thing he knew, Yugyeom was lying on, what felt like, the cold, hardwood floor. As he tried to clear his head in order to figure out what exactly happened, he eventually realized that, miraculously, none of the bones in his body were broken. He actually wasn't hurt anywhere, despite being hit head-on by a sports car at top speed. To say he was confused was definitely reasonable. Not to mention this also wasn't the exact situation Yugyeom was expecting when he entered the afterlife.
While he dragged his fingers across the flooring, he heard the chatter of familiar voices surrounding him. He didn't even need to open his eyes to know who they belonged to. But when he did, he came face-to-face-to-face with JB and Jinyoung, both standing over him with a mix of surprise and relief on their faces.
"Yugyeom! You're alright, thank goodness," JB said with a sigh of relief as he and Jinyoung helped him sit up. Glancing at his surroundings, Yugyeom saw that they were in the practice room. Catching a glimpse of his reflection in the mirror in front of him, he saw how blood-drained his face was and that his hair was disheveled, the part in the center of his hair slightly askew and showing more forehead on his left side. He looked like a total mess.
"We were so worried about you," the leader continued as Jinyoung held out a water bottle to him. The moment Yugyeom took the water bottle, the rest of 'we' JB mentioned came over. He saw Jackson, then Mark, then Youngjae... and that was it. Confused, he gave it another minute, but their last member never showed up.
"Uh, where's Bam Bam?"
"Who?"
That collective response from the six of them sent a chill down Yugyeom's spine. Raising an eyebrow, he tried again. "You know, Bam Bam—"
The youngest watched in dismay as the others turned to each other with confused expressions on their faces. Jinyoung eventually shook his head slowly, the look on his face remaining the same. "We don't know who you're talking about Gyeom-ah..."
At this point, Yugyeom came to the conclusion that everyone was playing a prank on him. Or that there was a hidden camera somewhere. Regardless, his patience and temper were both draining fast. Between this, and the fact he could be slowly losing it after believing that he was hit by some asshole and their car, he was definitely not in the mood for being made fun of.
"You all can stop acting. I know you all know who I'm talking about," Yugyeom snapped, his eyebrows narrowing as he did so. "Where is he hiding?"
As he started to stand up, JB reached over and calmly placed a hand on his shoulder. Looking up, Yugyeom saw that his eyes were staring straight at him and filled with genuine sincerity. They also stayed that way as he continued to talk, which definitely wouldn't happen if he was pulling a hidden camera prank on one of them. "Kim Yugyeom, there isn't anyone here named Bam Bam. Or anyone we know named that as a matter of fact..."
The leader turned to the others for confirmation, and Yugyeom felt his heart stop when he saw the others nod their heads.
"You're probably still dazed from earlier," Jinyoung assumed with a frown.
"Wait, what happened?"
"You passed out during practice," the older member continued, quirking an eyebrow in the process as if to say 'you seriously don't remember?'.
That was a bit different than what Yugyeom remembered. He guess if he had to choose, he'd rather faint during practice than be hit by a car. But regardless, the situation still didn't feel right. "...I did?"
Jinyoung nodded his head once again. "You definitely need to take it easy for the rest of the day. Maybe you should rest and watch the rest of practice—"
"No." After gathering his senses, he politely shook off JB's hand and managed to stand up. "No, it's alright. You're probably right Jinyoung-hyung; I'm just a little confused after passing out. I'm fine, really."
It was anything but fine. Despite the dubious look from the other members, they didn't question him and continued on with rehearsal. By the time they were eating dinner at the dorm, it wasn't any better.
For starters, there were only six of them eating at the table. Yugyeom kept counting just to make sure, but each time he only stopped at six. Each time, he secretly hoped that the count would change from six to seven, or the sense of familiarity would come back when that certain someone somehow walked into the kitchen. But the result the same every time. And it made Yugyeom sick to his stomach because he was absolutely sure someone else should be there. He should be sitting next to him and cracking jokes like he always does.
Kunpimook Bhuwakal.
Yugyeom continued to quietly mutter the name under his breath as they continued to empty their plates. Kunpimook Bhuwakal. Bam Bam. My best friend. There was no way he never existed; it was all too familiar to him. The way he smiled or how he always made everyone laugh with his crazy personality and gestures. It was impossible for the youngest to forget or imagine someone like that.
Once it was late and everyone was heading to bed, Yugyeom was surprised to open the door and see Youngjae sitting on the bed next to his. Confused, he was about to ask what the main vocalist was doing in his and Bam Bam's room, but then stopped himself. He and Bam Bam don't share a room anymore. Or rather, they never did to begin with.
As he was lying in bed, Yugyeom stared up at the dark ceiling with an impassive expression on his face. Maybe he died after all. Or was given a second chance to continue living his life.
He honestly couldn't decide which one he'd rather go through at this point.
Yugyeom quietly opened the door and stepped into the large practice room. It was his first time doing so after officially becoming a trainee, so saying he was nervous was definitely an understatement. He glanced around at all the unfamiliar faces surrounding him. This, he could definitively say, was his least favorite part of the whole process: the awkwardness of introducing himself and being polite, despite the well-known fact everyone in this room is competing against each other to be noticed and debut.
He could feel several pairs of eyes look at him from all directions, and suddenly felt very subconscious.
Eventually deciding to stand in a spot by the door, Yugyeom tried to ignore the uncomfortableness and mind his own business until the instructor came in and started training. That was, until another guy with a friendly smile and energetic atmosphere came over to talk to him.
"Hi, I'm Kunpimook Bhuwakal! But most people call me Bam Bam," he greeted, his smile so bright that Yugyeom may have temporarily gone blind. "What's your name?"
Yugyeom was pretty sure he was talking to him, but he replied quietly just in case he wasn't. "Kim Yugyeom."
"Well, since we're in the same training group, I guess we'll be seeing more of each other from now on," Bam Bam replied with a nod, standing next to Yugyeom without being invited to and leaning his back against the wall. "Hey, out of curiosity, what year are you?"
" '97. I turn fifteen in November."
"Me too!" Bam Bam gasped, turning to him with wide eyes. "I mean, I already turned fifteen in May, but it's nice to know there's another '97 here besides me!"
At first, Yugyeom raised an eyebrow, unable to figure out why he was so energetic and cheery. But for some reason, he wasn't put off by it. Without realizing it, the awkward atmosphere began to fade away, and his frown turned into a smile.
"Yeah, it's nice for me too."
For the next couple of days, Yugyeom attempted to adjust to whatever cruel prank the world was playing on him. The main thing he learned was the dorm's significantly less lively without Bam Bam there. Even with Jackson's usually loud, dramatic antics, it still wasn't the same. Every time he walked through the front door, the youngest expected to find Bam Bam lounging on the couch, as if he had the day off—either playing on his phone or messing around with his drone. He'd look up at Yugyeom with big eyes and an equally big grin on his face. He can practically see him in his head every single time.
That made his heart hurt the most.
Back at the dorm, Jackson announced that he was hungry. So, since they had practice in an hour and didn't have time to cook anything, they went out to their favorite curry place nearby (even though Yugyeom just voted with a half-hearted nod, it still counted in their books). Yugyeom quietly took a seat next to Mark, mostly because the others managed to sit down before him and it was the only spot left. Not that he didn't like sitting with Mark, or that it was out of the ordinary, but Bam Bam would normally sit next to him as well. It just didn't feel right.
Once their food arrived, Yugyeom also came to the conclusion that the food didn't taste as good as he remembered. He didn't even have it in him to finish his plate, which resulted in some questionable glances from the other members. Bam Bam would've offered to finish it off without a second thought, especially since he enjoys the spicy Thai curry, which was what Yugyeom happened to order. However, he knew none of the other members particularly liked spicy food. So there was no point in offering if he already knew what the result was.
"Yugyeom." Jinyoung's voice rang out from across the table. Of course; Jinyoung always noticed when something was wrong. "Is something wrong?"
"No," he lied, biting down on his lip immediately afterward so he wouldn't show it on his face. "I'm just really tired."
"Are you sure?"
This caused the other members to stop what they were doing and look over at the youngest with a mix of confused and concerned expressions. Feeling uncomfortable from them staring at him, Yugyeom simply nodded without saying another word.
After they finished eating, they headed back to start practice. Apparently, there's a concert coming up and they're going to run through some of their older songs to dust the cobwebs off. As 'Fly' started to play over the speakers, Yugyeom suddenly remembered that Bam Bam had his signature hand motion during his solo. He had no clue whether Mark or Jackson was going to rap his part in his place, or if they were even going to do the same hand motion. Not that it really mattered; it still wouldn't be the same.
Well, it turned out that Yugyeom didn't have to worry about that. The choreography was completely different than how he remembered it; there were moves he hardly seen before, let alone executed himself. As Jackson started rapping along to his part, it was obvious that Yugyeom didn't know where he was going or what he was doing. The others eventually stopped one by one and looked at him with wide eyes, like he never messed up the dance before in his life.
"Yugyeom-ah, what has gotten into you?" Jackson asked in a tone that was most likely harsher than he intended, sighing afterwards.
But that question was enough for the youngest to finally snap. He couldn't help it; the stress and holding everything in since this whole mess started became too overwhelming. Nobody seemed to get it. And honestly, he didn't expect them to the moment he found out that none of them know who his best friend is. If anything, he's sorry for himself since he didn't know how to respond to their concerned looks, since it technically wasn't any of their faults to begin with.
He walked around Jinyoung and coolly shoved past Jackson with a look that could kill thousands. "Just leave me alone..." he quietly hissed under his breath, but it could be heard loud and clear in the silent practice room.
"Yugyeom—"
Yugyeom ignored his leader's call with a shake of his head, shutting the door with a soft click behind him.
Yugyeom heard Bam Bam rap for the first time on accident.
It was while he was searching for a practice room, preferably an empty one so he could refine some of the choreography the instructor taught them earlier that week alone. Because, truthfully, he was still uncomfortable around all the other people in his training group. Well, all except for Bam Bam at least.
As he kept walking down the hallway, he noticed one of the doors further down was slightly ajar with the lights switched on. Curious, he quietly approached the door to hear someone rapping along to a song he never heard before, or could understand for that matter. Regardless, whoever it was had incredible skills; they didn't seem to miss a beat.
Taking another step, he peeked inside to find Bam Bam standing there with his phone propped on a music stand. His hands seemed to move with the music as he continued to rap along to the song he was listening to.
Yugyeom smiled to himself. In the back of his mind, he was secretly hoping it was Bam Bam from the start.
He remembered Bam Bam telling him he's auditioning to be a rapper instead of a singer, but he didn't expect him to be that good. After listening for a couple more moments, Yugyeom stepped away from the door and continued his search for an empty practice room, the smile never leaving his face.
Things were not that different than last week. Granted, Yugyeom was getting used to their new formations with just the six of them and hearing 'Got6' when doing their greeting instead of Got7. He also gotten used to the 'vocal exercises' and sometimes seeing Coco sleeping on his bed that came with Youngjae being his new roommate. But that doesn't mean he missed the quirks of his old one.
Little known to the older members, the youngest took walks later in the night while they're asleep. That way he wouldn't have to face the prospect of coming back to a million questions from them about where he went. He knew they were just looking out for him as the youngest, but recently Yugyeom felt like he could hardly breathe whenever he was around them.
Passing by dimly lit restaurants and bars, Yugyeom decided to try a new route of the city he's been walking through. He'd often wandered around the block, admiring the stars twinkling in the sky above or seeing what's open. Anything to provide a distraction and get his mind off his current situation before returning to the cruel reality back at the dorm.
However, one restaurant with a bright light shining from its windows and a waiter singing to himself while wiping down the outside tables managed to catch his attention. Pausing his music, Yugyeom removed his earbuds and instantly recognized the waiter's voice before his face. He felt his entire body freeze up.
It was Bam Bam and there was no mistaking it.
He couldn't believe he managed to find his best friend again. It was as if the clouds were parting, and the sun was breaking through and starting to shine.
There was some distance between the two of them; a safe one so Yugyeom wouldn't look like a creepy stalker. The slight pout on his lips and the flashes of white from his teeth when he smiles were exactly how he remembered. The youngest recognized the rap from one of the latest trending songs, and the way Bam Bam rapped it was perfect; maybe better than the original rapper himself. He was really good, he always was, and it broke Yugyeom's heart seeing his talent being wasted like this. Once he heard more than he could handle, he turned around and started walking back the way he came.
But the moment Yugyeom did that, the rapping stopped.
"Uh, excuse me." Footsteps followed behind him, and the youngest turned around to find himself face to face with Bam Bam, the rag that was originally in the waiter's hands now hanging from his pocket. "If you don't mind me asking, have we met before? You seem really familiar for some reason. Not to mention I could feel you staring at me," he asked, saying the last part with a comedic smile.
After raising his eyebrows in surprise, and embarrassment, Yugyeom allowed himself to glance at Bam Bam's eyes for a couple seconds before averting his gaze down at the name tag pinned on his black button down shirt. "I-I'm not sure."
"Oh." Bam Bam tilted his head to the side with a frown. "Maybe you just give off the feeling then."
"Maybe," Yugyeom repeated, shrugging his shoulders. "Or if you're into idol groups, you probably saw me on television."
"Oh! I'm sorry; I didn't know—"
"It's alright. We're not that famous or anything."
"I mean, you're the famous one between the two of us right now. So that has to be saying something," Bam Bam replied with a cheerful nudge of his shoulder. "What company are you under?"
"JYP."
"...Ah." Bam Bam suddenly glanced down at his black dress shoes, rubbing the back of his neck embarrassingly. Yugyeom waited for him to resume to the conversation, not even realizing he was holding his breath as he did so. "I auditioned for them a couple years back, but I didn't make it."
His heart stopped. Yugyeom forced himself to swallow the air he's been holding in down his throat.
"That's funny. To think there was a chance we could've been idols together if I hadn't given up... Small world, huh?" Bam Bam continued with a small laugh, keeping his gaze on the ground.
"Why did you?" Yugyeom demanded. He could tell his stern tone surprised the waiter judging by how quickly his eyebrows raised and the slight jump before lifting his head.
"They made their decision and that was the end of it," Bam Bam replied quietly, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.
Yugyeom couldn't believe what he was hearing. But then the realization hit him: this isn't Bam Bam. Well, it's Bam Bam on the outside; he had the same pout on his lips and gave off the same energetic atmosphere, but it wasn't the same Bam Bam on the inside. This Bam Bam didn't have the determination and passion his best friend had. If he did, he wouldn't have just given up if he was rejected by JYP. He most likely would've come back after working on what he did wrong, or auditioned for another company.
"Hey." Bam Bam's voice brought Yugyeom out of his thoughts. "Everything okay? You look disappointed for some reason."
"Ah, yeah, it's fine," Yugyeom denied, shaking his head briskly. This wasn't his friend; he shouldn't get too attached. "Anyways, I should probably get going."
The youngest turned around once again, instantly deciding that he would never walk down this street again now that he knows Bam Bam apparently works here. It was like they were meeting for the first time all over again, and revisiting the feelings he experienced back then had Yugyeom on edge for some reason. He might not be able to handle it.
Unfortunately, he felt a hand on his shoulder, preventing him from moving any further.
"Uh, by the way..."
Don't.
"My name's Kunpimook Bhuwakal. Although, since that's kind of long, most people call me Bam Bam."
Please don't.
"What's your name?"
A sudden image of fifteen-year-old Bam Bam smiling at him flashed through his mind. Biting the inside of his mouth, he let out a sigh. "Kim Yugyeom."
After he said that, he saw Bam Bam's eyes widen. "W-Woah, what's wrong?"
"Huh?"
"You're crying."
Confused, Yugyeom reached up and touched his face. Pulling his hand away, he noticed Bam Bam's observation was correct and that the tips of his fingers were wet with tears. "Oh... I'm fine. R-Really, I'm fine—"
"Was it something I said?"
"No!" Yugyeom said hastily, shaking his head and holding out a hand to stop Bam Bam from coming any closer to him, as well as increase the distance between them. "No, it's not—"
"I'm sorry." Bam Bam tilted his head with a sympathetic look in his eyes.
Instead of replying, Yugyeom continued to shake his head while laughing bitterly to himself. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. If he was upset, Bam Bam would usually cheer him up with inside jokes and tease about beating up whoever made him upset in the first place. He would reassure the youngest by saying he's there for him. Apologizing was the last thing he would do—he quickly learned back when he was a trainee that apologizing never solved anything when it came to his relationship with Bam Bam.
"Don't be."
"What?"
"I said." Yugyeom paused for a moment, taking a deep breath in order to not break down right then and there. "Don't be. It's not your fault."
"But—"
"Anyways. I should probably head back," he replied curtly, pushing past him in a similar way he did to Jackson a couple days earlier. He had to escape this situation ASAP.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Bam Bam called out from behind him. For a split second, Yugyeom was tempted to stop and tell him to leave him alone. That it was none of his business and to just forget they ever met in the first place. But Bam Bam was stubborn, no matter what universe he's in apparently.
So instead, he just kept walking. A couple paces later, the youngest turned back around and peeked around the corner to see that Bam Bam was no longer behind him; he must've gone back inside the restaurant. He eventually made it back to the dorm and silently closed the door, a million thoughts running through his head.
"Hey Gyeommie, your friendship with Bam Bam is pretty adorable," Jackson suddenly said, raising his eyebrows up and down playfully as the two of them walked out of the elevator and back to the practice room.
"Ah, stop teasing me hyung," Yugyeom complained as he shifted the numerous grocery bags he had in his arms around to a more comfortable position. He knew the older member was just joking, as it was a typical thing for Jackson to do, but he still fought every urge to kick him in the shin (due to his hands currently being occupied at the moment). "What even made you think of that in the first place?"
"Aww, look how red your face is!" Jackson cooed, completely ignoring the youngest's second question and pointing at his face with a gleeful smirk. "Just admit it."
"Where is this even going?"
Before Jackson could reply, and much to Yugyeom's relief, they were in front of Got7's practice room. Eager for Jackson to stop interrogating him about his friendship with Bam Bam, Yugyeom quickly opened the door and walked in, immediately ending any attempts of further conversation. The older simply trailed behind him, the same knowing smirk still on his face.
There was a knock at the practice room door.
Yugyeom stopped mid-dance after hearing the noise. The past couple of weeks, he quickly learned that the practice room was starting to become his favorite place to go—mostly because it's a place where he can go in order to escape and hide from everybody. Pausing the music, he turned around to see Jackson standing on the other side, uncharacteristically shifting side to side out of nervousness.
"Yugyeom-ah," the older member called softly, not moving from his spot by the door. "Hey, I'm sorry about the other day. I didn't mean to sound annoyed and upset you."
"...It's alright hyung. It's not your fault," Yugyeom sighed, forcing himself to smile. In truth, it wasn't Jackson's fault, or any of his members' faults for that matter. But it was getting more and more difficult to endure their concern without snapping out of frustration. "I'm just having a hard time, that's all..."
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
Yugyeom slowly shook his head, lowering it to avoid Jackson's sympathetic gaze. He just wished they would stop feeling sorry for him. There wasn't anything in the world they could to make this better, and he was fully aware of that. "I think this is something I have to figure out on my own."
Jackson bit the inside of his mouth hesitantly, but didn't push the subject any further. Yugyeom thought he was going to leave after apologizing, but he was surprised when he saw the older member do the exact opposite and take a step further into the room.
"Hey Yugyeom, I was wondering," he began, quickly glancing over his shoulder to make sure no one else was around before closing the door behind him. "About the person you were asking about after you fainted... Bam Bam. Who is that?"
Yugyeom raised an eyebrow. That question was definitely unexpected. He faked a closed smile. "No one Jackson-hyung. Don't worry about it."
"You sure? You sounded really serious about wanting to see him, so he must mean something."
"Yeah, it's fine," Yugyeom said, brushing it off with a wave of his hand. For a split second, he considered telling Jackson everything just to get it off his chest. But in the end, he knew it wouldn't do any good; Jackson probably wouldn't believe him. "I was just dreaming."
"...Alright." Jackson turned around and opened the door. "If you need anything, we're here for you."
"I know. Thanks hyung."
As he watched the door close, Yugyeom closed his eyes and let out one the longest sighs he could muster. He's never told so many lies at once, and felt so cruddy as a result, in his life.
"You know," Bam Bam said randomly. "I saw somewhere that best friends know a lot about each other."
Yugyeom lifted his eyes off his laptop screen and glanced across their shared bedroom at the older member sitting on his bed. The conversation he had with Jackson began to replay in his head. Where was he going with this?
"Yeah, I think I saw something like that too."
Bam Bam hummed thoughtfully, turning off his phone and removing his earbuds. "I also heard best friends stick up for one another and trust each other with their secrets."
Yugyeom nodded, still slightly cautious about where Bam Bam's taking the conversation. Before he had the chance to say anything, the older member beat him to it.
"Hey Gyeom, are we best friends?"
Yugyeom felt his eyebrows instinctually raise in surprise. That question sure was unexpected. "I-I mean, if you want to be—"
"Quick, what's my favorite color?"
Confused and surprised at the sudden question, Yugyeom answered like it was reflex. "Blue."
"Birthday?"
"May 2nd, 1997."
"Most embarrassing moment?"
Yugyeom grinned slyly without remorse. "Which one?"
Bam Bam answered by grabbing one of his pillows and throwing it at Yugyeom's side of the room with a glare, which the youngest effectively dodged. But the older couldn't stay mad at him, and his glare eventually softened as he smiled.
"Yeah, we're definitely best friends."
Despite his heart and head telling him not to, Yugyeom found himself continuously going back to the late night restaurant Bam Bam waited at. Some nights he would be inside behind the bar, tending to any late night customers who wandered in. The youngest fully understood that he would never be the person he used to know, but he couldn't let him go. Not yet.
Once the last of the customers left and he finished cleaning up the restaurant for the night, Yugyeom couldn't help but accept the waiter's offer to have a drink with him at the bar. After Bam Bam mixed their drinks, the two of them sat side by side and talked for hours. Sometimes, just sometimes, Yugyeom forgot they aren't even friends to begin with.
"Hey Yugyeom, you meet and hang out with a lot of other idols in the music industry, right?" Bam Bam asked suddenly, setting his glass down. The question was completely unprompted. "By chance, are you really close to any of them? Like, best friends with them?"
Yugyeom wasn't sure where this was going, but answered regardless. "Well, there's five other members in the group I'm in, but they're all older than me by at least a year or so. In all honesty, I don't really view them as best friends, but rather as older brothers... Although there was another idol who I was pretty close with before we debuted."
"Really? What were they like?"
The youngest stopped and took a deep breath, tightening the grasp around his glass to prevent himself from visibly shaking or breaking down in front of him. Exhaling, he sighed.
"Well," he started to say, refusing to look Bam Bam in the eye. "He was the first person I met while I was training to debut as an idol. We always made inside jokes with each other and hung out during breaks between training sessions. All the time we spent together meant a lot to me, and I wish I had the chance to tell him that."
"I'm sorry," Bam Bam muttered quietly, glancing down at the bar table with a guilty expression like this was somehow all his fault. "I shouldn't have asked—"
"It's fine," Yugyeom assured him, picking up his glass. As he took a sip of his drink, something came to him. The world might not give him closure with Bam Bam, but maybe he can find it on his own. "Actually, if you don't mind and if it isn't too much trouble, do you think I can talk to you about him? I know I can tell my other members, but... I feel like you'd genuinely listen to me."
Bam Bam raised his eyebrows, but he immediately regained his composure and nodded. "Yeah, of course."
After he said that, Yugyeom crossed his arms and leaned back against his chair. "I don't know where to start... he was the first person I'd consider to be my best friend."
"Well..." Bam Bam looked up in thought. "How about starting with what made him such a good friend in the first place?"
Yugyeom paused for a moment to think. "...To be honest, I think it was his personality. When I was little, I always moved around so I never really had the chance to make any close friends with anyone. But when he introduced himself to me during the first day of training, he had this... energy that made the whole thing more relaxing and lighthearted. He was always enthusiastic and could make anyone laugh. There was just something about him that I couldn't let go."
He was just like you.
"Wow, he sounds like a great person," Bam Bam marveled with a supportive smile.
"Yeah... there's just times where I wished I could tell him how much our friendship meant to me." Yugyeom paused and bit down on his bottom lip, letting out a deep sigh before continuing on. "Times where I regret arguing with him over little things, or when I feel like I didn't appreciate his company enough. I just... miss him."
Bam Bam frowned. Yugyeom can practically see the gears in his brain turning as he tried to come up with an idea to help him. "Do you know where he is now? Maybe you can call him, or you two can meet up again—"
"I don't." Yugyeom shook his head. "I lost all connection with him..."
"I'm really sorry," Bam Bam repeated sympathetically.
Sorry for what? For leaving him behind? For not being the person Yugyeom remembered? The youngest sighed. No, Bam Bam's not the one to blame here. In all honesty, no one's really responsible for this. But that still doesn't explain where Yugyeom should direct his anger toward, which only frustrated and confused him more.
"You don't have to keep apologizing," he insisted with a small smile, glancing down at his glass in order to avoid looking the waiter in the eye. "It's not your fault."
It looked like Bam Bam wanted to argue, but then he just lowered his head and nodded. Yugyeom felt like a broken record, constantly repeating 'it's not your fault' over and over again. But it wasn't Bam Bam's fault; in fact, this didn't have anything to do with him, not directly at least. It's just that this Bam Bam is the only piece of his best friend he has left in this universe. If he loses his best friend here, he'll never be able to forgive himself.
"Anyway, what about you? Do you have a best friend?" Yugyeom asked, attempting to steer the conversation away from him.
Bam Bam laughed to himself. "Well, I had a best friend back in Thailand. We both decided to move to Korea to try out to be idols together, although we ended up auditioning for different companies. You actually might have run into her before; she performs under YG Entertainment with the group Black Pink."
Yugyeom knew exactly who he was talking about. Bam Bam told him a lot about Lisa and how they were close friends since they were kids back during their trainee years. He always wondered what being friends with Bam Bam was like during childhood. Probably loud and crazy. Maybe even more loud and crazy than being friends with him as an adult.
"That's a long time, being friends with someone since childhood," he commended quietly, focusing on the empty glass in front of him. "You must've been crushed when you found out you couldn't be idols together."
"You could say that," Bam Bam replied with a faint smile. "It was disappointing that I didn't pass my audition, but I'm happy for her. Besides, we still keep in touch and try to meet up whenever her schedule allows it. It isn't the most ideal situation to share with your best friend, but I'm happy with it all the same."
"Well, I hope you're always happy then." It took all of Yugyeom's willpower to look Bam Bam directly in the eyes and smile at him. He was met with a confused expression, but the youngest knew he meant every single word. Even if he wasn't Bam Bam's best friend in this world, he was still going to support him and his decisions. He's worth more than anything, and Yugyeom had to trust that he'll eventually find it in him to let him go.
He has to.
"Yugyeom-ah, can I talk to you for a moment?" JB asked out of the blue. The youngest was sitting alone on the couch, observing some of the other members participate in an intense game of marbles. Instead of playing a normal round like they always do, Mark suggested that they try it tournament style to shake things up. And since Yugyeom was never good at marbles to begin with, he was instantaneously eliminated during the first round against Youngjae.
Not one to deny his leader, he scooted over to make room. "What's up hyung?"
"I just wanted to ask you about Bam Bam..." JB quietly inquired, taking a seat next to him. They glanced over at the second youngest member who was standing behind Jackson's chair and cheering him on against Jinyoung.
"Yeah... what about?"
"How close are you two?"
Yugyeom expected himself to be caught off guard at how sudden the question was. But, turns out he wasn't as surprised as he thought he'd be. At this point, judging by the number of times it's been brought up these past couple of days, the question seemed to be the topic of interest for some reason."We're best friends hyung. Nothing more, if that's what you're worried about."
"Alright, alright," JB said, holding his hands up in surrender with a small laugh. Much to Yugyeom's relief, he didn't really seem upset by his response.
"Why are you asking hyung?" he asked, tilting his head in confusion. He might not be surprised at the question, but that doesn't mean he isn't confused or curious why it was asked in the first place.
"I was just wondering," the leader simply replied with a shrug. There was a moment of silence between them before he spoke up again. "I know it's not really any of my business, but he's taking good care of you, isn't he?"
Yugyeom lowered his head in reply, not really wanting to give his leader a concrete answer. "I-It's not like that—"
"I guess what I'm trying to say is," JB interrupted while smiling down at him. "And you probably know this already, but treasure your friendship with Bam Bam. Best friends like you and Bam Bam share something special, and it would be a pity to see that go to waste over a petty argument."
The youngest nodded, keeping his head down self consciously. "Thanks hyung. I'll keep that in mind."
"You're smart Yugyeom-ah, and I believe you'll always make the right decision no matter what," JB reassured with a pat on his shoulder. "But sometimes those decisions are easier to make with friends by your side, wouldn't you say?"
Yugyeom began to realize that he's been spending too much time lying on bed these days. Most of the time he would just stare up at the ceiling or at the wall next to him, refusing to look at the bed across the room. If he was being honest with himself, it's probably making the situation worse—actually, he knows it's making the situation worse. But he can't motivate himself to do anything about it.
As he continued to close his eyes and look up at the ceiling, he felt a sudden weight sink down on the side of the mattress. Opening his eyes, he saw JB sitting and looking at him straight in the eyes.
"Yugyeom, where have you been going at night?" the leader asked gently, getting straight to the point as he placed a hand on his shoulder. "Youngjae told me Coco wakes him up on the occasion and that he doesn't see you in bed."
"...The practice room," he lied, silently cursing Youngjae for going to JB of all people about his disappearances.
"Is that true?"
Seeing that JB wasn't going to take that as an answer, he slowly sighed and shook his head. He figured this isn't the best time to be lying to his leader. "I take walks. I've been having a hard time falling asleep recently."
"Yugyeom, you haven't been acting like yourself," JB noted with a frown, tilting his head in a sympathetic manner. "After you fainted during practice that one time, you just stopped being yourself."
The youngest copied JB's frown, crossing his arms. What was he supposed to tell him? That his best friend just vanished from existence? That sometimes he considers walking into the middle of the street in the hopes that he'll get hit by another car so he'll be sent to another universe where Bam Bam's his best friend again? But then there's always the risk of him ending up in a universe where Bam Bam's the one who makes it as an idol and he doesn't. Or even worse: where neither of them make it as idols and it essentially becomes a nonexistent chance of them meeting at all.
"Can you talk to me about it?" The leader continued, a look of plea in his eyes. "Tell me what's bothering you, and maybe we can find a solution—"
"I don't think you can," Yugyeom interrupted politely, stopping the conversation before JB started feeling guilty about something that doesn't even have to do with him in the first place. "Don't worry hyung, it's fine. I'll get over it eventually."
JB sighed, but stood up from the bed nevertheless with a hint of a strained smile on his face. "...You know Yugyeom-ah, you've always been good at hiding your actual feelings. That's why, as your leader, I'm letting you know you're free to come to any one of us if something's bothering you."
Yugyeom acknowledged the words of advice with a nod, but he really wished that JB and the others didn't care as much as they did. It would make things a lot easier.
"Yugyeom!" Bam Bam exclaimed, bursting into the room and startling the youngest by jumping on his bed with a big smile. "Did you hear? We're going to Japan in a week!"
After recovering from the initial shock, Yugyeom nodded enthusiastically in reply. "Jinyoung told me that JB texted him after we sang through our parts for the upcoming single."
"I'm going to the mall to buy some new outfits for the trip before practice tonight," Bam Bam eagerly stated as he hopped off his roommate's bed and headed over to his side of the room to look for his wallet. "Want to come with me? I know you said you wanted to find some time to buy that leather jacket from the new store that opened recently."
Yugyeom felt his eyebrows raise, surprised that Bam Bam remembered that comment he made weeks ago. Taking a moment to contemplate, he eventually made his decision by following the older member's lead of jumping off the bed.
As the two of them walked out of the bedroom and towards the front door, Bam Bam suddenly stopped and turned to Yugyeom with the same big grin on his face. "You know what? I'll even buy the jacket for you if you want."
"What? W-Wait hyung, you don't have to!" Yugyeom exclaimed with a gasp, gently hitting Bam Bam's shoulder. The last time he saw the price for that jacket, it was at least over fifty thousand won. But, if he had to admit, saying he wasn't flattered by the offer would definitely be a lie.
"Have to, and want to," the older member corrected as he sauntered out the door with a point of his finger and a clever smirk. "There's a difference."
The youngest rolled his eyes, but didn't argue as he trailed after his friend with a small smile.
Bam Bam: You're on your way to Japan, right?
Yugyeom: Yeah
Bam Bam: Ah man, that's really exciting!
Bam Bam: I always wanted to go there...
Yugyeom: I guess
Yugyeom: I don't really know
Bam Bam: Well, you have to tell me everything when you get back! :)
Yugyeom didn't exactly remember why he and Bam Bam exchanged numbers. He only figured that it made sense since they spent so many nights together. Was it a mistake? Probably. But when Bam Bam brought the idea up, he didn't have it in him to deny the offer or think of an excuse.
If he was being honest with himself, it wasn't that bad. Sure, he'll never be able to move on at this rate, but Bam Bam kept him company during the long grueling hours of rehearsal. He texted the same way Yugyeom remembered, and the youngest doesn't feel like his friend was missing as much from his life as a result. Even if they're no longer best friends and just casual acquaintances at the moment, it's better than nothing. Maybe it was for the best. He wasn't sure.
Although some distance between them might help him figure everything out. Performing out of the country should keep Yugyeom occupied, both physically and mentally.
After the six landed and arrived at the hotel, they had to decide where they were rooming by pairing up. Yugyeom ended up rooming with Jinyoung, which he personally preferred out of the five of them. As the 'mother' of the group, Jinyoung's careful and thinks things through before handling an emotional situation. He knows when it's appropriate to leave something be and when it's appropriate to bring something up.
The youngest was sitting in the armchair, scrolling through his text messages with Bam Bam with a frown on his face. All of them were simple questions, generic answers, and superficial conversations. Nothing meaningful or long-lasting.
"Texting someone?" Jinyoung questioned from his bed.
Yugyeom sighed and set his phone down on the end table. "No."
The older member nodded before holding up some apple slices he's been snacking on. "Want some apple slices? You haven't eaten much since we got off the plane."
"No, it's okay. You finish them," Yugyeom rejected with a shake of his head, grabbing his phone and unlocking it again.
Jinyoung glanced over at the youngest before pausing his music and taking out his earbuds. "Are you sure everything's alright? You look really worried."
"Do I?"
"I mean, I guess," he replied quietly with a shrug. "It's not really any of my business though, is it?"
"It's just a friend hyung," Yugyeom said in surrender, standing up and going over to sit on his bed. "Nothing's up. I'm just bored. There's not really much to do around here."
"You could watch some TV," Jinyoung suggested, gesturing toward the TV. "You can change the channel; I'm not really paying attention in the first place."
"No, not that," Yugyeom denied, shaking his head. Lying down, he turned on his side and toward the window, away from the older member. "You know, I think I'll just go to bed. We have a long day tomorrow."
"Alright." Jinyoung decided he shouldn't push it any further. It was probably better that way—he figured this wasn't a good time to bother him with questions. "Goodnight. See you tomorrow Yugyeom."
"Hyung," Yugyeom suddenly called out from the kitchen. Sitting at the table nearby, Bam Bam looked up from the notebook he was writing in and gave the youngest his fully undivided attention. "What do you do when you're upset?"
He saw Bam Bam look up at the ceiling, lips slightly pouted in thought. "Hm... well, I usually need some time alone whenever I'm upset at something or someone. But while I'm alone, I take some time to myself and try to think of all the positive things in my life. Friends, family, our members. When I think about them, I tend to forget about what I was hung up on in the first place."
"Does it work?" Yugyeom asked as he joined Bam Bam at the kitchen table, slightly skeptical at how easy that sounded.
"Yeah, it works pretty well for me," the older member figured with a shrug. "Why? Is something wrong?"
"No, I'm fine," Yugyeom denied briskly. "I was just curious."
Bam Bam tilted his head as he closed his notebook. "It's okay to feel upset Yugyeom. Being an idol isn't easy you know."
"Yeah, I know. I just.." The youngest let out a sigh in order to calm himself before continuing. "I just feel like there are times where I let everyone down and make things more difficult than they need to be—"
"Gyeom, shut up," Bam Bam interjected softly. Although, despite how harsh those words are meant to sound, there was no harshness in his tone whatsoever. "You're not a nuisance."
And that's all he said. But really, that was all Yugyeom needed to hear.
Yugyeom: Hey
Yugyeom: So, I'm going to be pretty busy for the rest of the month, and I won't be able to talk to you as much
Yugyeom: Sorry :(
After sending that string of texts, he turned his phone off with a sigh. It was for the best, right? The chances of being best friends with Bam Bam again are small, so why keep trying to change it? It's all in vain anyway, and the longer he keeps clinging on this, the harder it'll hurt when reality comes breaking through. He couldn't risk his mental health like that. Especially with the performance they just finished.
And yes, he was well aware he could delete or block Bam Bam's number to save himself the trouble of doing it later. But he just couldn't bring himself to go that far; he thought he'd take this one step at a time. Besides, he figured he shouldn't be wasting time with something he can't control, and focus more on idol business. Like the TV interview, they're scheduled to attend in half an hour.
Before he could contemplate on the situation further, he felt someone's hand on his shoulder. Turning around, he saw a camera a couple inches away from his face. So, out of instinct, he cracked a big smile like he has been doing the past couple of days. The longer he keeps it up, he tells himself, the more likely it'll be real some day.
"What are you going to do with that hyung? Use it as blackmail against me?" Yugyeom asked as he watched Mark type some things on his phone, saying the last part comedically so the oldest wouldn't take it seriously.
"No, I'm posting it on our social media pages," Mark replied with a calm grin. "And it looks really good, if you ask me."
He held his phone out, showing Yugyeom the photo he took. And he had to admit; Mark wasn't wrong. Trying his best not to sound too sarcastic, the youngest snorted and rolled his eyes. "Gee, thanks."
However, after the glare the oldest sent him, he immediately took it back and apologized.
The thing Yugyeom liked about Mark is that he's quiet. He doesn't like to ask about things that don't concern him, stick his nose into other people's business unless he absolutely has to, or be pushy about anything. But still, he wasn't going to mention anything about Bam Bam. It's his secret. And despite how calm and understanding he is, it's possible that Mark might not even believe him.
"You know Yugyeom," Mark said in his usual placid tone, pocketing his phone. "You seem happier these days."
The moment he brought that up, Yugyeom began to realize that he was starting to feel happier. He nodded. "You're right hyung; I am feeling better."
Now that he had other things to focus on, he realized that he wasn't as hung up on Bam Bam like he was previously. Sure, the youngest still thinks of him from time to time, specifically from small random quirks that pop up once in a while. But everyone says time's a great healer, even if it's gradual.
He can do this. He's got this.
Yugyeom dropped to the ground, lying down with his back against the cool hardwood floor and faintly trying to catch his breath. His finals performance for Hit the Stage was approaching and he had to come up with a routine for the middle section. Why he made the choreography so challenging up to this point was beyond him, but he knew this part had to be just as grand, or even more. If that was even possible.
Bam Bam, who was watching his best friend practice, paused the music from his spot on the couch. Standing up, he walked over until he was standing over Yugyeom. "Need a break?"
The youngest nodded. Bam Bam sat down next to him, a closed-lip smile on his face. "It's looking really good so far."
Yugyeom acknowledged the compliment with a nod before sighing to himself. "It's never going to get easier, is it?"
"I mean, you can make the choreography easier if you want—"
"No, not that," he rejected. "I'm talking about being an idol. The workload; it will never get easier, right?"
There was a moment of silence before Bam Bam spoke up again. "...No, I really don't think it will."
That definitely wasn't the answer Yugyeom wanted to hear. Before he could say anything in reply, the older member kept going. "But you want to know what I do think?"
"What?"
"That even though our work is difficult and tiring, we're going to persevere and get through it. And someday, everyone will recognize the amazing dance routines for our title tracks created by the choreography mastermind Kim Yugyeom."
The youngest looked over to his right to see Bam Bam sitting crossed legged next to him, looking down at him with a smile on his face. And he returned it without hesitation.
"Thanks hyung."
Bam Bam nodded and squeezed his shoulder comfortingly before standing up and walking back over to the couch. "And the first step to greatness is to win Hit the Stage," he declared, turning around and looking at him knowingly.
Laughing, Yugyeom sat up and pushed himself off the ground. Forget him; Bam Bam's the one who truly deserves to be recognized. And while Bam Bam's supported Yugyeom as his best friend, Yugyeom's going to support him just as much, maybe even more. He deserves it more than anyone.
It's the least he can do for him.
The hallway leading to the elevators was empty as far as Yugyeom could see. He quickly glanced left and right one last time before slipping out the door. He was planning on grabbing some hotel-provided breakfast before taking an early morning walk to get some fresh air.
Checking the time on his phone, the youngest started walking down the hall until he heard another door handle turn behind him. He quickly turned around to come face to face with Youngjae leaning against the doorframe. He had a cup of coffee in one hand and the other buried in the pocket of his sweatpants.
"Hey Yugyeom," he called out, stepping out of his room. Yugyeom saw the older member glance over his shoulder before closing the door behind him, his usual cheerful smile on his face. "Don't tell any of the others I told you this, but I overheard something between the manager and some of the producers last night at dinner."
Yugyeom raised an eyebrow, encouraging him to go on.
"Apparently, we might be releasing a new album when we get back to Korea."
A look of surprise passed over his face. Now that caught his interest. "Really?"
Youngjae nodded before taking a sip from his coffee. "You know what else I heard? That you might be asked to be in charge of the choreography for the title track. And possibly some of the other songs too depending on how well they go—"
"I can probably come up with something when we get back," Yugyeom replied, cutting him off with a nonchalant shrug.
"We're counting on you Hit the Stage," Youngjae said with a goofy smile and a pat on the shoulder, the youngest slightly cringing at the way he used his nickname. "And, since I told you this, maybe you could think of putting me in the front for some of the formations? Just as a suggestion though!"
Yugyeom laughed at how quickly he said the last part. So much for his 'innocent' facade he always plays on for the fans. "No promises hyung. But we'll see."
The only thing that dampened his spirits was that he wasn't able to share the good news with Bam Bam. As the two of them walked toward the elevators, Yugyeom remembered when he told Bam Bam his goal of coming up with choreography for the title track for one of their albums someday. The older member supported and encouraged him just as much as the others did, maybe even more. Yugyeom remembered how shocked Bam Bam was when he saw his final dance routine for Hit the Stage, how proud he was after he won first place. This was practically Bam Bam's dream just as much as his.
And to think he was doing so well about not thinking of him this past week.
They were packing to fly back to Korea when something completely unexpected came to Yugyeom's mind. He wasn't even sure how he thought of it in the first place, but he figured he should ask about it while the two of them were alone for the time being.
"Bam, I have a question," Yugyeom said. Well, there's definitely no turning back now. "Although it might sound really random..."
Bam Bam glanced up from his open suitcase with a quirked eyebrow. "Uh, sure. What's up?"
"If you were reborn, would you change anything about yourself?"
"Me?" Bam Bam clarified, the mix of curiosity and confusion remaining on his face. Yugyeom nodded. He paused, thinking for a moment, before placing the shirt he was folding in the suitcase and sitting down on the bed. "I don't know... I don't think I'd change anything. I'd be born in Thailand, fly to Korea, and somehow become best friends with you again."
"You wouldn't want to try living a different life?" Yugyeom asked.
"Nope," Bam Bam replied with a shake of his head. "I'll probably keep on being your best friend, no matter what you choose to become in that different life you're thinking of."
Yugyeom snorted at how cheesy that sounded coming out of his mouth. "And how will you know that it's me and not some random stranger?"
"I just will," the older member replied with a shrug and a smile. "I think best friends have a bond so strong that the two will never forget the other person, regardless of what the circumstances are. So they'd probably find each other again, no matter how far apart they are."
"Maybe." Yugyeom wanted to agree with Bam Bam, but it seemed impossible. There was no way two people could find each other in a world inhabited by more seven people billion in counting.
They returned to Korea the following week. No one said anything about the title track since Youngjae brought it up, so Yugyeom just assumed he could take his time with the choreography. Not to mention he hasn't heard from Bam Bam in what feels like months. Life has started to move on without him, and Yugyeom knew it was for the best, since it meant he was finally learning to let him go. But he just needed one more night. He needed to know that he was still fine without him.
It was getting colder these days. He wrapped the wool scarf around his neck tighter as he prepared to venture into the chilly night. Double checking that the other members were sound asleep, he slipped out the door and started down the street with one destination in mind: the restaurant where they met for the first time he entered this universe.
Each step he took seemed to echo in his mind as he braced himself for seeing the familiar form outside wiping down the tables. Taking a deep breath, he rounded the corner.
He saw Bam Bam standing under one of the lights, rag in hand, lost in his work as he softly rapped to himself. Yugyeom took a couple steps closer in order to hear better, but not enough to be noticed unless Bam Bam completely stopped and looked up. He was rapping in Thai, so the youngest couldn't completely understand what he was saying, but he managed to roughly translate a couple melancholic words. He wondered if it was something Bam Bam thought up himself.
Shaking his head, Yugyeom tried, and failed, to get himself back on track. He just wanted to know if Bam Bam was still here, working the late night shifts like he always does. And by the looks of it, he was. He would've left right then and there if it wasn't for the invisible, unexplainable force keeping him leaving in the first place.
Yugyeom didn't even flinch when the rapping stopped and he saw Bam Bam looking him straight in the eyes. As the waiter walked over, he continued to stand in place without moving a muscle.
"I didn't know you were back," Bam Bam greeted. Thankfully, judging by his face, he didn't look too upset.
"Ah, sorry... I wanted to surprise you," Yugyeom muttered while glancing down at the cobble sidewalk, as if that would make the lie any less obvious.
Regardless, Bam Bam seemed to buy it. "Well, since you're here, let's have a drink like we used to."
Like we used to.
If only he knew how much that phrase meant to Yugyeom. That the two of them go back so much further than he will ever know. But, as the youngest constantly reminded himself, it's a miracle their paths even crossed in the first place.
"How have you been anyway? It feels like we haven't spoken or texted in months," Bam Bam said as he led the youngest into the restaurant.
"I've been alright," Yugyeom replied, sitting down as Bam Bam made his way behind the bar. And despite how cynical he might have sounded, he meant every word. "What about you?"
"Where do I start?" Bam Bam sighed, laughing resentfully to himself. Yugyeom raised an eyebrow. This couldn't be good. "Lisa and I met up a couple weeks ago before she went on her world tour. But afterwards, she told me her schedule was going to get more intense after the tour was over, and that we might not be able to hang out or talk for a long time."
"I'm sorry," Yugyeom muttered. He wasn't sure if it was sympathy or the ability to slightly relate to the situation. Either way, he knew whatever it was, it wasn't happy.
"It's alright," Bam Bam said, brushing it off like it's no big deal. If this was eating him up, he was doing a great job of hiding it. "Things happen. It's a part of life."
If only it were that simple.
The waiter began focusing on mixing their drinks, suavely pouring various syrups and alcohols into two separate mixing glasses. Soon enough, the two were sitting in the same seats with the same drinks they had before Yugyeom left for Japan. They clinked their glasses together, as if there was something to celebrate, and took a sip.
"You know, I keep wondering when I'll start feeling like myself again," Bam Bam remarked, setting his glass down. Of course. Yugyeom knew that feeling way too well.
"Well," the youngest began hesitantly. "It's normal for a situation like that to take a longer time to move on from."
"You're right," Bam Bam agreed with a nod. "Losing someone, especially a friend, is never easy... I guess we both know that feeling now, huh?"
Yugyeom couldn't relate more that statement. Bam Bam was right here in front of him, and yet this whole conversation was taking him back to where he started—trying to cope with the loss by hoping Bam Bam would become the person he'd previously known. But he eventually learned that it will never happen, no matter how close they get from this point onward. Their friendship will never be the same. At least, that's what he told himself anyway.
"I actually feel like I'm taking it better than I thought I would," he continued, turning to Yugyeom with a thoughtful expression on his face.
"You're handling it way better than I did," Yugyeom commented with a small laugh. "What's your secret?"
Bam Bam glanced up at the ceiling, his lips slightly pursed in a thoughtful way as he contemplated the question presented to him. "You could say it's my philosophy."
"Philosophy?" Yugyeom repeated, confused as to what he could mean by that.
The waiter nodded. "Here's the thing Yugyeom." He paused, creating a brief moment of suspense before going on. "It's never too late to start over. Don't you think?"
That caught the youngest off guard. He didn't know how to answer, and instead decided to continue looking straight at Bam Bam's eyes. He remembered all the long nights they spent together in their dorm room, talking about and teasing their older group mates long after they turned the lights out. Although those days are long gone at this point, the relationship between them was still just as meaningful.
Maybe Bam Bam was right all along; their friendship doesn't have to end.
"You know, you could be right."
The longer the night went on, the more Yugyeom didn't want it to end. But nothing lasts forever, and the next thing they knew, they have to part ways until the next time they met up. While the thought would have originally torn him up inside, the possibility of seeing Bam Bam again felt more comforting if anything.
Once Bam Bam turned the lights out and locked the door, the two bid each other goodbye. Yugyeom turned around and started walking back the way he came. While he didn't feel truly fulfilled, this meeting was still progress nevertheless. Like Bam Bam said: it was the start of a new beginning.
As he continued to reassure himself, the youngest almost didn't hear his name being called.
"Yugyeom!"
Turning around, Yugyeom saw Bam Bam facing in his direction on the other side of the restaurant. The waiter started walking toward him, closing some of the distance between the two of them. "Do you know when you're going to be free again? If you don't mind me asking."
He felt an unexpected wave of relief flow through his body after he heard those words. Perhaps that's what he's been waiting to hear the whole time.
Reaching into his jacket pocket, Yugyeom pulled his phone out and glanced down at the black screen. He was so thankful he didn't delete Bam Bam's number when he had the chance, despite strongly considering it beforehand. He held it up for Bam Bam to see with a smile on his face. "I'll let you know."
"Then I'll be waiting," Bam Bam replied with a similar smile. With that, he turned around and walked away.
As he progressed down the street, Yugyeom officially decided he was willing to take a second chance. He clutched his phone inside his jacket pocket, as if letting it go would inevitably cause him to lose everything between him and Bam Bam up to now. Sure, this definitely wouldn't be his first choice if he was given a second chance, but, against all odds, he and Bam Bam found each other again. That was all he really needed for now.
Reaching the dorm, Yugyeom quietly shut and locked the door behind him before leaning against it, a million thoughts running through his head. Checking his phone, he saw that there were no recent notifications on his home screen. Despite that, he opened the text conversation between him and Bam Bam. Without thinking, he quickly started typing.
Yugyeom: How about coming down and hanging out with me at the studio sometime?
The rain gently tapped against the bedroom window as it fell down. The lazy weather couldn't be more perfect for staying indoors. And it just so happened that Got7 has the day off—JB learned that the rain wasn't going to let up all day, so he decided that no one was leaving for any major schedules or events.
Bam Bam and Yugyeom were spending the day by sitting on their respective beds, Yugyeom intently watching a drama on his laptop. He was so focused on the screen that he almost didn't catch Bam Bam jumping off his bed and walking over to come sit on his. Scooting over to make room, the youngest unplugged his earbuds from the jack as his friend hopped up.
"Yugyeom-ah," Bam Bam said unexpectedly, nudging his shoulder in order to get his attention. "Do you think we'll always be best friends?"
Curious, and not expecting that particular question, Yugyeom paused the drama. "Why do you ask hyung?"
"It just came to mind," Bam Bam replied with a shrug, laughing to himself like it was a stupid question to even ask in the first place.
"Well," the youngest began, humming thoughtfully. "Technically, we won't always be because, you know, circle of life... But until then, I don't see why we wouldn't be."
Bam Bam nodded, a small smile on his face. "Yeah, I was thinking that too."
Yugyeom unpaused the drama, quietly muttering 'then stop worrying so much, you idiot' under his breath and playfully shoving him off the bed. But, it would be a lie to say he wasn't secretly glad that the two of them are on the same page.
A/N: Hi everyone! Welcome to my first one-shot/story for 2019, as well as for my account! While I don't have much, I still hope you enjoy this little gem I managed to come up with while working on my other series on my Quotev account (which I'll eventually write over here too if you're interested). It's probably one of the longest things I've written in a long time (+10,000 words is serious dedication).
Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments! Any reviews and favorites are greatly appreciated!
~Amayrllis Blaze