It's brilliant in it's unusualness... I, the master of humor and parodies, am going to PARODIZE MY OWN FIC!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I stil can't bear to read the damn thing, it makes me cry every time I start to, and so I figure the best way to fix that is to make a parody of it. So this shall be my parody of Standing Outside The Fire. I shall call it... Uh... Um... Landing a Flexible Flyer? Naw... How about... Aw, hell, I can't think of anything. It shall be called 'The Nameless Parody Of 'Standing Outside The Fire.'' WOW! That's brilliant! To fully understand this parody, you should probably go read the original. And review it, too! Alrighty, here we go....

Heero turned to ask Duo if he wanted anything to eat, but Duo was nowhere in sight. Then Heero spotted Duo standing by a tree, looking up into its branches. He walked over to the tree and asked "Duo? What are you doing?" Duo pointed up in the tree. "There's a squirrel up there." "What's that have to do with anything?" Heero asked, puzzled. "It's right up there in that branch..." Duo said, pointing up at a branch. Then a squirrel jumped off the branch and landed on Heeros head, where it began running in circles, hissing. (Yeah, that's right, the squirrel hissed.) Duo leaned forward and kissed the squirel. "Awww, Heero, it's so cute... Can we keep it?" By then, the squirrels running in circles had caused Heeros hair to look a lot like Marge Simpsons. "NO!"

"Get it out of my hair so we can go get something to eat. Of course, I'm just assuming that you're hungry, but... You're you. How could I be wrong?" Duo grinned. "Well... I am kinda hungry. Okay, Mr. Squirrel, time for you to go now. I hope you're a flying squirrel, because you're going to get some frequent flyer miles..." Duo pulled the squirrel off Heeros head and drop-kicked it into the middle of the street, where it was hit by Relena Peacecrafts limousine. Immediately Relena jumped through the front windshield of the limousine and grabbed the squirrel. "Are you alright, you poor little thing?" Then the limousine driver saw his opportunity and ran over Relena, putting an end to her reign of stupidity.

"Hey, let's go to that fancy french restaurant Quatre and Trowa are always talking about." Duo suggested. Heero nodded his head. "Good idea. Let's go." So the two drove to the restaurant at the other side of town and went inside. "Well, we should probably sit down and eat pretty fast. I'm planning on having a heart attack in a few minutes." Heero informed Duo. "Oh, that's too bad. Well, as long as you don't leave any unremovable stains, I guess it doesn't matter all that much. Heero nodded his head. "Waiter? I'd like to have... Uh... Gimme the house special." Duo said, and then Heero placed his order. Once they had finished eating, the waiter brought a bowl containing strawberry ice cream covered with raspberry sauce and cherries. "Here's your Heart Attack(TM)(C), sir." Heero thanked him and began to eat. "Hey, that looks good... I want one, too. I want to have a heart attack! Someone give me a heart attack!"

A nice old man ordered Duo a heart attack, and soon Duo was happily eating his heart attack. Once the two gundam pilots had finished, Duo saw a customer eating some sort of gelatinous dessert, one that looked very appetizing. "Hey, waiter, get me one of those." Duo said, pointing at the food item. "You mean you want a Words(TM)(C)? Alright then." And soon afterwards, Duo was eating his words. Once he finished, he glanced at his watch. "Heero, think we could stop by the hospital real quick? There's someone very important to me there..." Heero frowned. "Not like that, I love you. No one else." Heero nodded his head. "Alright then. I'll drive."

At the hospital...

Duo looked around the lobby, and then he saw who he was looking for. "Santa Claus!" He yelled. "Oh, shit, it's you again! No, I'm here to comfort the sickly and wounded! Go away! Leave me alone!" Duo hit the floor and wrapped his arms and legs around the Santas left leg. "Leggo my leg! Go away! Why won't you leave me alone?!?" Duo smiled happily and refused to release the Santa. "I knew I should have stayed in bed today... My horoscope plainly said 'Ich ein ber berliner.' I still don't have a damn clue what it meant, but it didn't sound good..."

Two hours later...

"Duo, can we leave now? I'm sure that guy has better things to do." Santa nodded his head. "Yes, that's right, I have much better things to do. And if you leave right now, I'll be sure to give you lots of neat stuff this Christmas." He informed Duo. Heero glared at Santa. "Hey, I don't get payed all that much, you know. Don't go promising him things that I can't afford." Then Santa leered at Heero. "Well, maybe if you'd told him to leave me alone TWO HOURS AGO, I wouldn't do this. Hey, Duo, was it? I'm going to get you... Oh, hell, I'm going to get you Asia for your birthday. And Europe, too. And, if you're really good, I'll get you Australia and Africa." Duo let go and grabbed Heeros arm. "Alright, let's go, Heero."

And so concludes the first chapter of my own parody of my own fic... Don't foget to review... Ciao....