A/N: Hey guys, I realise that it's been a while since I last posted anything, let alone anything for this little series, but what can I say? I've been crazy busy with Uni, holidays and other things. Regardless, I still hope you enjoy.
So here it is, following on from; 'Sleeping Beauty', 'Pretty Fairy' and 'Collateral Chappy', the latest instalment of my Renji's revenge series.
And I don't own Bleach!
Ikkaku sighed, resting his wooden sword over his shoulder as he looked at the pile of knocked out bodies in front of him. Practise with unseated squad members was child's play and only fun for so long anyway. He tossed the wooden weapon onto the pile of bodies and watched as it bounced off them and clattered to the floor.
He shoved his hands into the pockets or his Shihakusho and left the training room, whistling and kicking his legs out as he walked without bending them. Yumichika was off doing something with Rangiku and the Captain was probably being misled around the Rukongai by the Lieutenant on patrol. So ultimately, squad wise, he had nothing to entertain him.
Figuring that now would be an opportune time to go have a nap in his barracks, he meandered in that general direction, not wanting to rush.
It was on his way there that he ran into Renji.
The pineapple turned the corner of the corridor and came face to face with Ikkaku, where the pair grinned at each other.
"What brings you here?" Ikkaku asked, stopping and leaning against the wall.
Renji drew his arms behind his head. "Captain Kuchiki has some paperwork for Captain Zaraki to sign."
"The Captain isn't around. He'll be lost in the middle of the Rukongai right about now."
Renji looked out the window, "Makes sense, I thought his Reiatsui felt quite far away. I figured I would just leave it in the office for when he got back. So what are you doing now?"
Ikkaku smirked, "I'm gonna take advantage of the quiet and go for nap."
"It's alright' fer some," Renji laughed. "The Captain's treatin' me as some kinda delivery boy, he'll be askin' me pick up his scarf from the cleaners next."
Ikkaku chuckled, pushing himself off the wall by his shoulders and sauntering away, throwing a casual "I don't envy you," over his shoulder as he went.
With his back turned, he missed the malicious glint in the redheads eye.
It may have been a matter of months since he had almost destroyed Rukia's happiness and she had almost destroyed his face, but just because he had been laying low, it didn't mean he had forgotten. He was merely bidding his time.
He made his way to the Kenpachi's office, throwing the papers onto the already cluttered desk full of paperwork. He wouldn't be surprised if it never got signed. He pulled out his list, seeing what else Byakuya was having him do, and grinned as he saw that he would have a little playtime between his next errand and the one after that.
Through the man's light slumber, Ikkaku stirred as he felt the raging spiritual pressure of his Captain drawing extremely close. From his position, with his head buried in the back of the sofa in his barracks, he assessed how close they actually were. They were within the Seireitei, from what he could feel, so he rolled onto his back, arching it and stretching out his arms and legs. He heard several cracks from his back and smirked in satisfaction as he got up, making sure to pick up his Zanpakuto from its propped up position against the coffee table.
He slowly made his way through the Seireitei, putting out his feelers in an attempt to locate his Captain and Lieutenant.
A giggle from behind him made him turn, where he stared out a couple of female Soul Reapers that were looking his way, sniggering behind their hands. Brushing it off, he carried on, until he heard the outright laugh of a man. He turned quickly, glaring at him. "What?"
The soul reaper, who was slightly surprised at the sudden action, just gazed at him for a moment, before smirking. "I just didn't know you 'luffed bunniez'."
Ikkaku looked at him like the man was losing his mind. "When in the hell have I ever said I 'luffed bunniez'?"
The man shrugged, choosing that moment to walk away chuckling.
Ikkaku growled audibly, but moved on anyway.
After walking for a further five minutes, he was actually becoming rather paranoid. Whenever he passed someone, he would here a snigger, a giggle or an unintelligible mumble, and it was really starting to piss him off.
At one point, he had wondered if there was something on his back. Awkwardly, he had reached around with both arms in turn, exploring as much of his back as he could, but found nothing of consequence. He'd even covertly checked his backside, but still he felt nothing.
'If they're laughing at me, then what the fuck are they laughing at?'
He rounded the corner and spotted his targets, standing there looking at nothing in particular.
"Captain, Lieutenant." He greeted them, smirking.
"Hey Baldy!"
A vein popped in his head at the hated nickname, "Don't. Call. Me. That."
Yachiru giggled, but said nothing more, merely sticking her tongue out at him.
"What are you doing here anyway?" Zaraki asked, looking down at the man below him.
"I was coming to find you. There's nothing to do around here."
"You can help us!" Yachiru yelled, smiling wide. "Kenny got us lost again."
The big man growled, "You were the one giving me directions."
Completely ignoring him, going so far to cover his face with her hand as he leaned over his shoulder, she continued to address the bald man "Will you take us home?"
Ikkaku blanched. It still mind boggled him that the pair could physically manage to still get lost to this day, regardless of how long they had been in the Seireitei.
"Tch, follow me."
He turned abruptly, taking a couple of steps before he was halted by the sounds of laugher.
Jerkily, he turned his head, eyes ablaze, toward his superiors, to see them both roaring with laugher.
"What is so goddamned funny?" He yelled, having enough of this reaction.
Yachiru merely shook her head while Kenpachi actually wiped tears of mirth from his eyes.
Absolutely seething, he stormed off until he was out of sight, yelling about how he hoped they stayed lost, before feeling out for Yumichika and Rangiku.
Somebody was going to tell him what everyone was laughing at. If it was something to do with idle and loathsome gossip then his girlish friend and the she-devil of squad 10 would know.
The pair we're sitting happily in a field in the Rukongai, Rangiku happily sipping at her sake while Yumichika absorbed the sun in an attempt to provide himself with a 'beautiful sun kissed glow'.
Between the two of them, the sudden appearance of Ikkaku flash stepping directly in front of them caused what would have been a comedic scene had he not been too pissed off to enjoy it.
Rangiku showered herself and Yumichika as she spat out a full mouthful of sake while the dark haired man yelped in shock and disgust.
Ikkaku glowered down at them while they looked up at him in surprise, wondering exactly how they had wronged him for him to be looking at them like that.
"Spill it."
Rangiku shot Yumichika a look before answering. "Spill what?"
"Why is everyone laughing at me? If it's gossip, then you would know."
Yumichika looked at him confused. "I don't know what you're talking about. Why would everyone be laughing at you?"
Ikkaku threw his arms up in the air in frustration, "You tell me!"
Rangiku pouted. "Well, I don't know. What were you doing when everyone was laughing at you?"
"I was just walking past them. When I turned my back on the Captain and Lieutenant, they found it hilarious!"
"Is there something on your back?" Yumichika asked, tapping his chin.
"I couldn't feel anything. Can you see?"
Ikkaku turned around, putting his hands on his hips and looking up at the sky slightly. When the pair didn't say anything, he became impatient. "Well?"
A snort from behind him made him whirl around in a rage. "What the fuck are you laughing at woman?"
Rangiku had her eyes squeezed tight shut and her lips pressed together while Yumichika was sniggering behind his hand.
"I didn't know you 'luffed bunniez'," he said.
Ikkaku blanched for a second, remembering what the random soul reaper had said earlier. "You aren't the first to say that. What does it fucking mean?"
"I think its best I show you."
"Huh?"
Yumichika clambered up from his place on the grass and walked around behind the bald man, pulling out his Soul Phone as he did so.
Ikkaku heard the snap of the camera and bared his teeth. So there was something on his back then.
Yumichika snorted and walked around, hesitantly showing Ikkaku the screen.
Ikkaku stared at the image before him with a straight face for a second, before all hell broke loose. His eyes widened and looked like they would pop out of his skull as his screamed in a blind rage. And all Rangiku and Yumichika could do was laugh.
Yumichika and Ikkaku walked into the squad 11 barracks a couple of hours later, Ikkaku still fuming while the other would snigger every now and again, earning a violent 'shut up'.
"I still don't know who would have done it." He growled.
Yumichika merely smirked and shrugged, before looking down the corridor with furrowed eyebrows.
There was a crowd of their squad members standing around a bulletin board, roaring with laughter.
The pair made their way over, pushing through the sea of bodies to see what was going on. Yumichika saw it first, joining in the laughter as Ikkaku joined him and froze. On the board was three blown up pictures. The first depicted himself and a certain red haired male. He was drooling with his head hanging off the edge of his sofa while Renji crouched next to him grinning. The second was of Ikkaku with his face buried in the back of the sofa, the back of his head exposed and Renji grinning again, but with an arrangement of felt tip pens in his hands. The third was the reason for Ikkaku's intense anger. The entire back of his head was entirely coloured in blue, all apart for the attempt at a bunny rabbit in the centre. Around it, in thick black pen was 'I LUFF BUNNIEZ' with different coloured flowers and hearts dotted around.
Ikkaku couldn't believe his eyes. He stared for matter of minutes, the laugher and ridicule wrapping around him like a blanket, though he wasn't hearing it.
Yumichika glanced at him during his own laughter, seeing the warning signs of what was about to occur. He sidled off, making sure to get well out of the way before it was too late. Back at the end of the corridor, he stopped, tucking himself around the corner so that only his head was hanging around, to watch things transpire. It only took a couple more seconds.
An almighty war cry was heard before the bodies that surrounded the bald man were thrown aside one by one. Eventually, Ikkaku was left standing alone, breathing heavily with his teeth bared and fists clenched. Yumichika smirked; this would not end well for some.
Ikkaku practically steamed, with his face bright red and the veins in his temples raised.
He quickly drew his fist up, bringing it forward and slamming it into the notice board, effectively cracking it in half.
He couldn't speak. There was only one thing he could manage. It started as an audible growl and morphed into one word. Or, rather, a name.
"RRRRENJIIIII!"
In the squad 6 barracks, ears perked up under red hair. He could feel it. Ikkaku had finally realised. Renji grinned, putting his duplicate copies of his revenge into a box, on top of his serial chappy killings and Ichigo in a fairy costume. He knew that he was going to be hunted down like game, but he didn't care. Revenge was sweet enough for him.
MisaxMisa: Oooh Renji, you're gonna get it now.
Renji: *shrugs* It's worth it
Ichigo: So who are you going to get next?
Renji: That's for me to know, and for all of you to find out.