"Hitsugaya-Taichou, I've finished my report" I said as I held out my papers. He tapped a pile in front of him, indicating that I should put it there. "Am I done then?"
"Yes, you may leave" he said, no even looking up at me.
"Arigato" I smiled as I bowed respectfully and walked out.
As I rounded the corner, I nearly ran over Anya, who was much shorter than me.
"Anya!" I squeaked in surprise as I stopped dead in my tracks.
"Going to see Ukitake-Taichou again?" she asked slyly.
"Yeah" I said, nervously tucking my hair behind my ear.
"You two have tea together every night now. Is something going on between you two?"
"What? No!" I said. "He's a captain…" my excuse was cut off by her putting her fists to her hips and tapping her foot on the ground. "Oh…" I said as I realized what I was saying. "I forgot." She and Hitsugaya-Taichou were engaged now, so it wasn't an excuse at all.
"You two would be great together. You could care for each other, seeing as you have the same illness. Not only that but he's a great guy and I'm sure he would take really good care of you" she said thoughtfully.
"I know all of that stuff about him" I replied. "I just don't know if I feel that way about him."
Her eyes fell to my neck and the necklace he had given me. It was a snowflake and it represented his promise to protect me from the illness we shared. "You must feel something because you're still wearing that necklace he gave you. I don't think I've seen you without it since he gave it to you."
"It's special to me and I happen to like it" I argued.
"Okay" she sighed, defeated. I wondered why it was so easy to beat her in this argument today. Usually she argued until I gave up.
"What's with you?" I asked.
"It's not me. You're going to be late" she stated, pointing to the clock through the window.
"Oh" I gasped, startled by the time. "I'd better go then."
"Yeah, go, shoo…" said Anya, giving me a shove towards the thirteenth division.
"Okay, okay…" I said as I pushed her off of me and began to walk towards the division. I didn't want to act desperate to get there.
As soon as she was out of sight, I took off at a run and didn't stop until Ukitake's quarters were in sight. It was then that I slowed down and caught my breath and continued to walk out on the path over the water.
I was intercepted by the two third seats of squad thirteen before I could get to the door. My immediate reaction was to try to push past them and keep going but they held their arms out. "We can't let anyone bother Ukitake-Taichou, he's ill" one of them said stubbornly.
I glared at them. "I am too."
"No, he's bedridden and we had to send for the fourth division" said the other, standing her ground. "Please leave and come back later."
"Look," I argued. "If he's so bad he's bedridden then that's all the more reason for me to be here. I've had to handle this on my own before so I can take care of him until the fourth division gets here."
"No! You can't care for him, only we can!" she cried. Suddenly I understood. They were jealous of me for some reason, maybe because I was close to Ukitake-Taichou by the illness we shared.
"Fine" I sighed, defeated. I turned around and walked away and back towards my division. My mind was in a fog and I was focused on Ukitake-Taichou and if he was alright. I wanted to see him more now then before to be sure that he was okay.
"Yuki!" someone said in my ear, startling me and making me jump nearly out of my skin. I look over and saw Unohana-Taichou smiling at me.
"Unohana-Taichou" I said with a smile. "Are you going to see Ukitake-Taichou?"
"I should be asking you that" she replied.
"No, I'm afraid not" I admitted. "The jealous third seats wouldn't let me."
"You shouldn't let that stop you if you really like him."
"I don't!" I cried out. "We're just friends! Why does everyone think that?"
"You go and have tea with him nearly every day… that is, every day but today… and you always wear that necklace he gave you."
"He's my friend and I enjoy spending time with him and I have nothing else to do."
"Okay" she said. "Well, if you have nothing better to do then come and assist me and I'll show you how to administer his medicine since he already knows what you need."
"Okay" I said cheerfully, my chipper mood returning. She laughed and started walking with me in tow. I wasn't sure why she laughed but I was sure I didn't want to know.
When we got back to Ukitake-Taichou's quarters, I followed Unohana-Taichou in past Kiyone and Sentaro and it took all of my self control to not stick my tongue out at them. Ukitake-Taichou was lying in bed, emitting a cough every now and then. I stared at him for a moment before Unohana-Taichou handed me a wetted rag.
"I'm going to prepare his medicine. You watch" she ordered. I nodded in understanding and took the rag. As she got out the supplies, I walked over and sat down at his bedside and dabbed his forehead with the cool cloth. He just barely cracked his eyes open at the contact and I smiled down at him.
"Yuki?" he asked weakly.
"Shh… don't talk" I said as I continued to dab away. He smiled up at me and reached towards my free hand and I realized that he wanted me to take his hand. I smiled and placed my hand in his and he gently closed his fingers around mine. His hand was soft and somewhat cold and even oddly comforting to me. I knew that he was looking for comfort but some small part of me that I was trying to suppress wished there was a hidden meaning behind it. It made me realize how far in denial I was about my feelings for him.
Unohana called my attention to herself and then showed me how to prepare each of his medicines. It was al the same thing that I got but in different quantities. She gave him his medicine and asked me to go and prepare some tea. When I came back, he looked much better and he was even sitting up. I smiled and set the tray with the tea on it down and then sat down by him. "I see you're feeling better" I said with a smile.
"Yes, I'm already feeling much better" he said. "How are you?"
"Worried" I admitted. "I've seen when you were sick but never like this."
"Don't worry about me. I'm not going anywhere."
I smiled sadly and then poured each of us a cup of tea and held his out to him. He nodded in thanks as he took it from me and Unohana-Taichou gave him the last of his medicine.
"That will be all then. I'm going to head back to the fourth division" said Unohana-Taichou as she packed up and then walked out, leaving me with Ukitake-Taichou.
"You really don't need to worry about me" he said with a smile. "You should worry more for yourself."
"How can I not worry when you looked as awful as you did a few minutes ago?" I asked as I took a sip of tea.
"I'm fine" he retorted. I smiled upon seeing that he really did seem okay and suddenly I began to feel very tired. It had been a long day and I had been running almost constantly. I was probably too busy to realize how tired I was and now that I got a moment to relax, exhaustion hit me like a wave.
"Are you okay?" he asked me when he saw my eyes droop a little.
"Yeah, I'm okay" I said. "Just a little tired."
"You can lie down if you need to."
"No, I'll be fine." I smiled and took another sip of my tea.
We talked as usual and joked around. At some point, I ended up lying on the floor from laughter or something. I was always comfortable with him around and I could sprawl out somewhere and not care if he was watching. It was nice to have a friend like that. Sometime when it got later, and without knowing, I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
I opened my eyes slightly and groaned. My nose was filled with unfamiliar scents and my bed was softer than I remembered. I sat up as my vision cleared and I glanced around finding that I wasn't in my room. It took me a few more seconds to see that I was in Ukitake-Taichou's room and in his bed. The clock rang eight o'clock and I finally became aware of the situation. "Oh no!" I yelled as I leapt out of the bed. "I'm late!"
I was still fully dressed but I was supposed to be at the office at seven. "Yuki, you're awake" said a voice from the door. I turned and saw Ukitake-Taichou. "You fell asleep on the floor last night so I moved you into my bed. You must have been extremely tired so I let you sleep there." He smiled softly.
I blushed at my own stupidity. "Thank you, Ukitake-Taichou but I'm late so I have to get going. I will speak with you later." I bowed and then rushed past him. Before I could get out the door completely, he caught my arm and pulled me back into him in a loose hug.
"Thank you" he said. I gave him a quick hug back and then ran off, using shunpo to get there faster.
I got to the office and rushed inside, bowing my head and then looking up to see Anya and Hitsugaya-Taichou sitting together. "Gomenasai, I didn't mean to be late. I fell asleep in Ukitake-Taichou's room and I woke up late."
Anya giggled and I realized too late that what I had said had been stupid. "So you spent the night with Ukitake-Taichou?"
"No! It wasn't like that. I was tired and I fell asleep…"
"That's not what I was told" said Anya.
"What do you mean?"
"I heard a rumor that you two did some unmentionable things last night" she said with a smirk. "People heard you" she added in a whisper. I blushed at the thought of that being true. He would never do something like that and we couldn't be together like that, he was a captain. Not only that but I was positive that he only wanted to be friends.
"Anyway" said Hitsugaya-Taichou, interrupting Anya's annoying antics. "You have been assigned to go to the world of the living for a week starting in two hours. Please don't be late again."
I nodded and bowed, walking out with Anya on my heels. "Yuki, I have to speak with you" she said. I slowed down and allowed her to catch up. "You had better be telling the truth because that was a real rumor and it's spreading like wildfire."
"A real rumor?" I asked.
"Kiyone and Sentaro are the source as far as I know and what they're claiming is that you've been having a secret affair with him and that last night you were careless. They're also saying that you're doing it because you want the open lieutenant position."
"But I'm not…"
"Don't worry. I'm just joking around when I tease you. I believe you when you say that you're not doing anything but I would watch out for this rumor. Maybe this will quiet down while you're gone so don't take any drastic measures yet."
"Thanks, Anya" I said with a weak smile. Kiyone and Sentaro would probably keep the rumor from getting to Ukitake-Taichou so I wouldn't have to worry about him but I really didn't know what to do otherwise. Those two ha me backed into a corner and it was my own stupid fault.
Fire from the tip of my blade engulfed and destroyed another hollow. That had been number twenty-seven and there were two more sightings I had to deal with. It was a total of seventy-six on the week so far and tonight was my last night so I hoped this would be it. I was exhausted and I wanted to go home and see if the rumor was gone.
I quickly disposed of the last two hollows and headed back to Kisuke Urahara's shop, where I was staying. As I walked in the door, Kisuke informed me that dinner was ready and went on to quiz me about my day. The entire time that we were talking, though, my mind was focused on what waited for me back home. Had the rumor one away? Did it get worse? What would I do?
The more I thought about it, the more apparent it became that this was a bad situation and no matter what I did it wouldn't get any better. The only option I had was to avoid him completely. Once I got back, if I kept spending time with him, it would fuel the rumor and make matters worse. I decided that once I got back I would be so busy that I couldn't meet with him anymore. It was all I could do to protect both of our reputations.
As soon as the gate opened I ran forward into it, looking backwards to Urahara. I already had all of my reports written so it was easy to take them to the office and hand them in. Immediately after doing so, I went to my quarters and passed out from a long week at work. It was seven hours before I woke back up. I took a quick shower and dressed in some comfortable clothes before sitting down and looking at the clock. It was around six and I should have headed to Ukitake-Taichou's quarters but I wasn't going to give in.
A half an hour passed before there was a knock on my door. I walked over and opened it and moments later Anya was on my bed. "I had a feeling that you would be here. You must be exhausted. I heard that you killed a massive amount of hollows."
"Yeah, there were a lot of them and I've been tired."
"The rumor hasn't died down yet. It's still going strong and I guess that Ukitake-Taichou hasn't head about it yet or he would have put it down."
I frowned and touched the necklace that he had given me with one hand. "I wish that he and I could just be friends. I wasn't sure if I liked him at first but that's purely because I was in denial but now I know that I like him and my reasons for not telling him still haven't changed. He's still a captain of another squad and I still think he doesn't feel the same for me."
"Did you ask him how he feels about you?" she asked. I shook my head. "Then how do you know how he feels about you if you haven't asked?"
"I just know it" I argued. She nodded blankly as if she were coming up with a plan. "Please don't ask him or tell him anything" I pleaded.
"Okay, your loss" said Anya. She stood and walked out, leaving me to think over her words.
It had now been five days since I came back and that made twelve days since I last saw Ukitake-Taichou. I had kept myself so busy that when I got home at night I passed out from exhaustion. Even when it aggravated my condition, I kept working as hard as I could.
"I have this pile ready and it goes to the ninth, eleventh, and thirteenth divisions" said Hitsugaya-Taichou as he slid a stack of papers towards me. "That should hopefully be all for those divisions. Between you and Anya we almost have everything done and out."
I walked forward and picked up the stack of papers, deciding I would start with squad thirteen and move back towards the tenth. Ignoring the cries of exhaustion from my body, I used shunpo to get to the thirteenth division and I quickly knocked on the door. Kiyone answered the door and immediately glared at me. "What do you want?" she growled.
"I'm here to drop off some papers" I said sweetly and kindly as if she hadn't said a word. Quickly, I pulled out the papers and handed them to her.
"Kiyone, is that Yuki?" I heard Ukitake-Taichou ask from inside the building.
"Yeah" answered Kiyone, glaring at me again as if to tell me to back off. I glared back until Ukitake-Taichou was at the door.
"Yuki, you haven't come to see me in a while" he stated.
"I know" I said as I looked at the ground. "I've been extremely busy as of late. There's been a lot of work to do since I got back." Before he could say anything else, I piped up again "I really should be going. I have a lot to do. I promise I'll come by for tea someday." With that, I turned around and used shunpo straight off of his step as far as I could and then walked to the last of the divisions I had deliveries at.
By the time I got home I was extremely tired from my long day at work. I allowed sleep to take me without protest. Hopefully, he wouldn't hold me to that promise.
I got up early the next morning to do my chores and, as habit would dictate, put on the necklace that he had given me. A frown crossed my face as I thought about that necklace. 'Maybe it's best if I don't wear it' I thought as I took it off and put it safely away in my small jewelry box. He wouldn't see me anyway so how would he know if I was wearing it?
I took a shower and got dressed, taking one more look at the jewelry box before I walked out of my quarters and towards the division. When I got there, I went straight to work and made tea for everyone. Knowing that Anya would be with Hitsugaya-Taichou and would want me to stay, I took three cups of tea with me to the office.
As I walked in, I was greeted by Anya, who was relaxing on the couch. Hitsugaya-Taichou was sitting calmly next to her. I handed each of them their tea and then took my own and sat down. "I've never seen the two of you so relaxed this early in the morning" I said.
"It's a weekend and thanks to you we hardly have anything left" said Anya.
"Oh" I said. I smiled slightly at my ability to work.
"You can have the day off. Anya and I can take care of things" said Hitsugaya-Taichou.
"Um… wow. Are you sure? Maybe something can be cleaned…"
"It's okay, Yuki. You've been working really hard. It's about time you got a break" said Anya with a smile.
This was bad. There were no excuses today. If I didn't go see Ukitake-Taichou, what excuse could I make? "Can I hang around here for a while?"
"Sure" said Anya, obviously taken aback by my sudden question. "But not for too long."
"Arigato!" I said with a large smile.
Anya smiled at me and laughed. "You're just trying really hard to avoid him."
"Avoid who?" asked Hitsugaya-Taichou.
"Ukitake-Taichou" answered Anya before I could say anything.
"Oh, I heard he was feeling better" said Hitsugaya-Taichou. "He was sick again a few days ago but he's alright now."
Guilt flooded me as I realized that I hadn't been there for him. I looked down and frowned. Maybe coming and staying there had not been a good idea. "I think I'm going to go somewhere else. I need to be alone to think" I said as I stood up.
"I understand" said Anya as she stood up with me and hugged me. She let me go and allowed me to walk out. I ended up walking out and into the woods and to a small pond where I took off my footwear and sat with my feet in the water.
"Maybe I should tell him" I said to the air around me. "It's not like I would lose anything if I told him that I feel the way I do. It would be easier on both of us then keeping it bottled up inside and him getting false promises from me."
There was a rustle in the bushes behind me. I leapt up and took a fighting stance as the thing walked out but it was just Neko. "Hey, don't freak out. I'm not going to attack you" she said. She walked over and joined me by the pond side.
"I haven't seen you in a while" I said to her.
"Yeah, I haven't been getting out much" she said with a smile. "But I have gotten out enough to hear about that rumor. I don't believe it of course, it sounds nothing like you."
I looked at her and frowned. "It really has gotten that far."
"Don't worry. Kuchiki-Taichou silenced it in our squad right away. A lot of captains have been doing that because they know neither of you are like that."
"It's still bad. I really do like him but now I can't get anywhere near him for feat that others may start to believe it… and I don't think he feels the same way."
"Hey, don't talk like that" she said. "A rumor's a rumor. It doesn't make it true… and as for whether he likes you or not… you'd be surprised. I was afraid to admit my feelings to Byakuya because I thought he didn't like me. My heart stayed true to that fear and I was convinced that he didn't want to be with me until the moment his lips touched mine." She went into a bit of a trance for a moment and then she snapped her vision back up to me and smiled. "I guess what I'm saying is that you shouldn't give up."
I nodded and smiled a bit to myself at her success. 'But she didn't have two overprotective third seats.' She stood and shook the water from her feet. "Our situations are still too different" I said stubbornly.
"It's whatever you make of it" she said as she walked away.
I growled and brought my knees up and buried my face in them. It would have been mice to just go and confess but with the two goons running around it was much harder to do anything. I needed to avoid him to stop these rumors and anything else… and maybe my feelings would change that way too. My mind made up to avoid him, I stood and put my footwear back on, there was no going back.
It was three more days of successfully avoiding him before things died down again. I was on my way out of the office when Hitsugaya-Taichou called out from behind me. "Yuki, you have an order to go see Ukitake."
"A what?" I asked as I turned around. He was holding up a very official looking envelope.
"There is an order here for you to go see Ukitake-Taichou. It says you should go immediately."
'Oh no' I thought. "Yes, Sir" I said with a bow and then I walked out of the office and headed towards the thirteenth division.
My nerves began to act up and my stomach filled with butterflies as I approached the division office. I reached out and knocked on the door. Kiyone answered it and immediately glared at me. "What do you want?" she asked as she stepped into the doorway.
"Ukitake-Taichou sent for me" I said stubbornly, not wanting to take any kind of crap from her.
"He's not here" she answered me. "He went to his quarters."
I groaned. This was already bad but now I had to chase him down. "I will go see him then" I said as I turned from her and the door and began to walk to his quarters.
"Wait, I'll come too" she said suddenly and she leapt over me and landed in front of me.
We walked silently to his quarters and when we got there she made a point of knocking on the door for me and standing in my way. He came to the door and opened it with a smile. "Kiyone, could you leave the two of us alone?" he asked as he gestured for me to come in. She bowed and quickly made her way away from the building.
I walked calmly inside and took a seat where I was shown. He disappeared for a moment and then came out with a tray of tea. "I have to order you here to see you now" he stated calmly as he sat down by me and handed me a cup.
"I've been very busy and I've been sick at least once. I'm sorry that I haven't made time."
"I don't think that's it."
"What do you mean?" I looked up into his eyes and detected a hint of sadness.
"You've been avoiding me… and you're not wearing the necklace I gave you anymore."
"What? N-no I haven't… and it was irritating my neck a little today."
"Please don't lie to me. Just tell me why so I can fix it."
"It's not you" I said as I fiddled with my cup. "It's me."
He laughed a little. "This sounds like a cliché break-up." His sudden lightheartedness lessened my nervousness. "But really, why are you avoiding me?"
"I don't know if you've heard the rumor…"
"A rumor?" he asked after a pause.
I nodded a bit. "There's a rumor going around that I'm sleeping with you to get myself promoted."
"Well, that's silly."
"Silly, Sir?" I asked, completely surprised by his comment.
"Yes, silly" he said pointedly. "Neither of us would ever do something like that."
"Yeah. It's silly to think something like that could be true. I don't think you would feel like that about me" I laughed. I stopped when I realized he wasn't laughing and looked at him nervously. Did I say something wrong?
"You think I wouldn't want to be with you?" he asked.
"Well, I just thought that… you're a captain and I never thought that you were showing that kind of interest in me…"
"Do you feel that way about me?" he asked, interrupting my excuses.
"Well, I…" I looked up at him. He was completely calm. It wasn't a joke or a lie. Could I tell him? "Y-yeah" I stammered as I looked down at my teacup.
There was a rustle of cloth and suddenly his hands were on mine. My eyes widened as I watched the ripples caused in the tea by the sudden motion. "I'm glad to hear you say that" he said. I looked up at him and my green eyes met his brown ones. "I really care about you" he admitted.
"You do?" I asked timidly, butterflies eating away at my insides.
"Yes. I care about you a lot. I have since I met you."
I smiled and removed my hands from his so I could set me tea down. He seemed confused by the look in his eyes as I did so. After I had set it down I turned back to him and hugged him. "I'm really happy."
He put his arms around me and pulled me closer to him. His body was incredibly soft but firm and I buried my face in his neck so I could absorb his warmth. He smelled sweet, just as I remembered. "Can I kiss you?" he whispered in my ear, his breath tickling my neck. I nodded shyly and loosened my grip on him so he could look at me. The thought along made me blush and shake nervously. "Don't be nervous" he said with a smile as he drew closer to me. I closed my eyes and I could feel his breath on my lips. He placed one hand on my face to guide me and then his lips met mine.
The kiss was sweet and innocent as his lips were soft and it felt perfect, as if it was meant to be. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he moved his to my back, allowing the kiss to deepen. He didn't make any further moves. It seemed that we both wanted it to stay innocent and pure, but yet he pressed a bit harder, showing the smallest hint of lust. As we withdrew, I kept my eyes closed and absorbed the lingering feelings and the smallest things like his touch, taste and smell.
"Be with me" he whispered. "Let me protect you."
"Yes" I said as I opened my eyes and looked deeply into his. He ran a hand through my hair.
"I want you to transfer to my division. It has been far too long since I had a lieutenant."
"But Ukitake-Taichou…"
"Juushiro" he corrected me. "All the captains have talked it over and we can think of no one better and this way I can keep you close."
"Well, if the other captains think so… then I'll do it… because I want to stay close to you."
He smiled and sat down by me again. I leaned over and rested my head on his shoulder. He bent down and gave me another peck on the lips to put my mind at ease and I began to feel sleepy realizing that I hadn't relaxed at all for a long time. I closed my eyes and snuggled up to him, whispering a gentle "I love you" before drifting off.
I awoke in a warm bed and I slowly sat up. The scent around me was familiar and brought back memories of the day before. Juushiro must have placed my sleeping form in his bed. Not wanting to get up, I snuggled back into the pillow and tried to fall back asleep. "Wake up" Ukitake said as he entered the room.
"I don't want to" I whined. He reached over and yanked the covers off of me.
"You need to get up. We have to go to your acceptance meeting as my lieutenant."
"Already?" I asked as he picked me up and put me on my feet. "I thought it would take longer."
"I wanted to get you transferred as soon as possible. Keeping you close will be easier that way."
I smiled at his need to keep me safe. "I love you."
"I know and I love you too."