"Come on, fellas, you wouldn't hit a kid with glasses, would you?"
Lowery backs up, only to find a solid brick wall behind him. A circle of bullies closes in on him like a pride of lions would close in on a particularly scrawny antelope. They look like they're enjoying the hunt.
"Time's up, Cruthers. Give us your money, or else!"
Lowery smirks.
"Wow, a bully after lunch money? How original. You gonna give me a wedgie next?"
One of the kids holds him against the wall by the throat.
"Watch it, twerp."
"Ach-ach! You got it," Lowery chokes.
The bully lets him go.
"Alright, loser. Fork it over," the head bully growls.
Lowery gulps and reaches into his pocket. Slowly, he takes out five dollars and folds back the bills one by one.
"Well, it looks like there's three of you, so if you wanna divide it evenly, you're out of luck. Maybe you'd better skip the whole thing and just let me keep-"
The head bully snatches his cash away with a quick swipe of his hand.
"We'll take it all, twerp."
Lowery feels dismayed, until he comes up with a brilliant idea. He pushes his glasses up his nose and gives a coy smile.
"Well, you'll never have it all, since the rest is buried in a secret place."
Lowery tries to suppress a snigger as he detects a hint of interest in the bullies' eyes.
"What did you say, twerp?" a short boy hisses.
Lowery puts his hands in his pockets casually. He rocks back and forth on his feet, pretending that he's trying his best to cover up a secret.
"Oh, it's nothing. I have the rest of my money buried in a special place. I come from a family of gypsies, so we have lots and lots of gold coins. We bury all of our money under bridges to stop the pirates from stealing it."
Lowery gasps and puts his hand over his mouth innocently.
"Oops."
The head bully sneers.
"His gold is under the old bridge!"
Lowery shrugs.
"Well, you caught me. I guess you won't be needing that five bucks anymore . . ."
"We're keeping everything!" one of the boys sneers.
Lowery rolls his eyes.
"Alright, I didn't want to do this, but I guess I'll have to tell the teacher. She's gonna be real mad that you stole from me. She might even call your parents. Then the Feds get involved, and it's all downhill from there."
The head bully shoves the money against Lowery's chest.
"Take your stupid paper. Once we find that gold, we'll hide it somewhere secret so no one ever finds it. Including you."
Lowery nods.
"Yeah, that kind of goes without saying."
Giving him one last punch for good measure, the head bully makes his way down the road, undoubtedly walking towards the old bridge. His cronies follow, eager to share the nonexistent fortune. Lowery puts his money back in his pocket and laughs deviously. He knew that the kids in his class weren't particularly bright, but this is a whole new level of stupid. It would be easy, very easy, to con some of them out of a few bucks. Then he would have extra spending money, and the bullies would get what they deserve. There was literally no downside to his plan!
Well, unfortunately for Lowery, his mother doesn't seem too thrilled with his idea. She sits him down on her knee and gives him a serious look.
"Lowery, baby, you're very clever, but you have to remember to use your gifts wisely. Even if those kids have it coming, you can't stoop down to their level to get what you want. If you have the chance to be good, take it. There's no use in being a huckster. It brings you nothing but trouble."
Lowery frowns.
"But it'd be so easy, Mama!"
She nods.
"I know. The easiest way to get something done is usually the worst way. Don't use your talent for evil, Lowery."
He frowns bitterly.
"Well, it's certainly not doing me any good right now. I get picked on all the time."
His mother pats his head.
"I called your teacher. She'll deal with it. In the meantime, don't go picking fights. You have a tendency to say the wrong thing when you aren't careful. That's gonna get you into trouble someday, I guarantee."
Lowery snorts.
"Well, I'm just joking around."
His mother shakes her head.
"You'll learn very soon that there are certain people who don't understand your sense of humor. Don't take things too far, and whatever you do, think before speaking."
Lowery yawns.
"Sure, Mom. Whatever."
She flicks him on the nose.
"I'm serious, Lowery. You take after your father. He's always putting his foot in his mouth. It's good to be witty, but you have to remember that some people can't take a joke."
Lowery grins.
"I'm sure if I'm funny enough, they'll be able to take it just fine."
He grunts as his mother flicks him on the nose again.
"Lowery, don't be petulant. You listen to your mama. I know what I'm talking about. I've lived life. I know how everything works. I'm giving you good advice."
Lowery shrugs.
"I just don't see why I can't be funny. It's kind of my shtick."
His mother puts her hands on her hips.
"You can tell jokes, chickie, but don't forget to be serious sometimes. You need to respect authority. Nobody likes a smartmouth."
"You mean smartass?"
She cuffs him.
"Watch your language!"
Lowery whines.
"I was only joking . . ."
His mother sighs and turns her eyes to the ceiling.
"Oh, lord. What'll I do with this child of mine?"