Summery: In which, is the retelling of the old fairytale 'The Frog Prince' – not quite as you remember it. Naruto/Sasuke.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or even the Frog Prince. What do I own, you ask? Not bloody much, it seems.

A/N: Hello all. This is one half of Mysterious Members, Emerald here. I do hope you all like this little oneshot, as I've been meaning to write one for some time now, and decided I might as well post it under this account as opposed to my individual one. This is based on a drabble I originally did on Fiction Press, but I think it works well as a NaruSasu.

Enjoy!

Generic Fairytale Romance

By Emerald Elf-Slytherin707

What's that, the Frog Prince?

Haven't you heard that one before? Well, It's been a while since I've told this tale, and some things in it are bound to change. My memory isn't what it used to be, after all, but bear with me.

All right. Once apon a time, on a particularly fine evening, a young village girl-

Er, no, wait... a very effeminate boy, put on his bonnet and clogs-

Wait! I mean, his featherhat and finest boots - and went out to take a walk by himself in the nearby wood. Yes, that sounds about right.

The boy walked through the greenery of the trees for hours - he knowing the forest very well, as he did - and when he came to a cool spring of water surrounded with lush grass and with a tall rose flowering in the middle, he sat himself down to rest for a while.

Now, this boy had a golden ball in his hand, which was his favourite plaything (although it wasn't really his), and he was always tossing it up into the air, catching it again as it fell.

After a time he threw it up so high that he missed it as it descended; and the ball bounded away, rolling along on the ground, until at last it fell down into the spring - and disappeared.

"Shit."

The boy looked into the spring after his ball, but it was very deep - so deep in fact, that he could not see the bottom of it. He began to cry - shout, in a very manly way, and he said;

"Alas! If I could only get my ball back, I would give all my finest clothes and jewels - er, I mean, rock collection and spurring knife - and everything that I have in the world!"

Whilst he was speaking, a frog with strange strips on its cheeks and a swirl on its back, jumped out of the water to sit beside the boy, and he said; '"My lady, why do you weep so bitterly?"

"It's lad, actually." The boy corrected. "The name's Sasuke."

"Really?" The frog asked, "You seriously need a haircut." The frog cleared it's throat though, and it repeated it's question anyway, "Sasuke, why do you weep so bitterly?"

"Alas!" Said the boy, '"What can you do for me, you nasty frog? My golden ball has fallen into the spring."

"So?" The frog retorted, "It's not that important. And isn't it rather unusual for a boy of your age to be playing with a ball?"

Sasuke glared at the frog, before he looked around, and then lowered himself so that his face was level with the creature's bright blue eyes.

"Look, frog, I'll level with you." The boy said, "The ball ain't mine. It's my brother's, and if he gets home and it's missing, I'll be sold off again. You catch my drift?"

The frog seemed to think about this for a moment, before it said; "I don't want your spurring knife or other weapons, or your stupid rock collection; but if you will love me, and let me live with you and eat from off of your plate, and sleep on your bed, I will bring you your ball again."

The boy raised an eyebrow incredulously at the frog. 'What nonsense,' Thought the boy, 'A frog is talking to me. I really have to stop eating cheese before I go for these walks. Can it even get out of the spring to get to my house? I doubt it.'

So he said to the frog, "Well, if you will bring me my ball, I will do all you ask."

Then the frog put his head down, and dived deep under the water; and after a little while he came up again, with the ball in his mouth, and threw it on the edge of the spring.

As soon as the young boy saw his ball, he ran to pick it up; and he was so relieved to have it in his hand again, that he never thought of the frog, but ran home with it as fast as he could.

The frog called after him, "Hey, Sasuke! Take me with you like you said! Oy!"

But the boy did not stop to hear a word, merely muttering after himself about talking frogs and his brother's wrath.

The next day, just as the boy had sat down to dinner, he heard a strange noise - tap, tap - plash, plash - as if something was hopping up to his house, and soon afterwards there was a gentle knock at the door, and a little voice cried out and said, as a melody in the air:

"Oy! Sasuke-teme! Open the door and let me in, like you promised, bastard!"

The boy, rather startled, ran to the door and opened it - and there he saw the frog, whom he had quite forgotten.

"Oh, bugger. Forgot about him." Sasuke muttered, before he said to the frog on his doorstep, "Listen, frog. This isn't going to work out. We're too different, you and I - and I really prefer to be the same species as the people I date, so you can just go home now."

Then he shut the door as fast as he could, and returned to his seat at the table in his home.

His father, the village nit-picker, seeing that something had startled his son, asked him what was the matter.

"Oh, it's just this nasty frog," Said the boy, "He's at the door, actually. Probably won't leave for a while - hope you don't mind. He helped me out in the forest the other day, and I told him that he could live with me here, or some crap like that. I didn't mean it. I thought that he couldn't get out of the spring, really; but there he is at the door, and he wants to come in. I figure I'll just leave it, aye?"

When he stopped speaking, though, the frog knocked again at the door, and said:

"I'm still here! Sasuke-teme! Let me in!"

Then the young boy's father said to him, "As you have given your word, you must keep it; so go and let him in."

The boy gave his father a strange look, "Can't we just kill it? We kill toads every day."

The boy's father simply gave him a stern look, though, and he rose to answer the door once again with a sigh. When de did so, the frog hopped into the room, and then straight on - tap, tap - plash, plash - from the bottom of the room to the top, till he came up close to the table where the boy had sat.

"Pray, lift me upon the chair," Said he to the boy, "And let me sit next to you."

The boy frowned, muttering sourly under his breath, though he complied. As soon as he had done this, the frog said, "Put your plate nearer to me, that I may eat out of it."

This the boy did too, scowling and grimacing, and when the frog had eaten as much as he could, he said, "Now I am tired; carry me upstairs, and put me into your bed."

And the boy, though very unwilling, took the frog up in his hand, and put him upon the pillow of his own bed, where the slimy frog slept all night long - and the boy got not a wink.

But the next morning, as soon as it was light, the frog jumped up, hopped downstairs, and went out of the house - to return to his pond.

'Now, then,' Thought Sasuke with relief, 'At last he is gone, and I can forget about that talking frog.'

But he was mistaken; for when night came again - he heard the same tapping at the door; and the frog came once more, and said:

"Sasuke! It's your true love, at the door! Let me in!"

And when the boy opened the door the frog came in, and slept upon his pillow as before, till the morning broke. And the third night he did the same. But when the boy awoke on the morning of the fourth day, he was astonished to see, instead of the frog, a handsome prince gazing on him with the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen and standing at the head of his bed.

The prince told the boy that his name was Naruto, that he had been enchanted by a spiteful fairy, who had changed him into a frog; and that he had been fated so to abide till some fair maiden should take him out of the spring, and let him eat from their plate, and sleep upon their bed for three nights.

"But I'm a boy." Sasuke argued.

"Close enough." The prince Naruto shrugged. "You have broken his cruel charm, and now I have nothing to wish for but that you should go with me into my father's kingdom - for you see, I am a prince."

The village boy deadpanned. "You're shitting me."

"Oh, I shit you not," Naruto replied quite sincerely, "And so, I will take you back to my kingdom; where I will marry you, and love you as long as you shall live."

And the young boy, you may be sure, was to be quite happy with all this; as suddenly then, a brightly coloured coach drove up, with eight beautiful horses, decked with plumes of feathers and a golden harness; and behind the coach rode the frog-prince's servant, faithful Heinrich, who would take them away into the horizon to foreign lands, where they would love each other for eternity-

"Whoa, hold on!" Sasuke cried, interrupting the narrator (rather rudely), "I'm not sure I want all of that."

"Why not?" The frog-prince Naruto asked.

"Well, we've only just met, for starters." The boy replied, his expression contemplative, "And I'm not so sure my father would be terribly happy with me running off to marry boys who had until very recently lived in ponds as a frog."

"Can't you just go along with it?" The prince asked impatiently, "I promise we'll live happily ever after."

"Yes, well," Sasuke replied stubbornly, "That's really not all there is to it. I mean, what about the rising economy? There's sure to be a slave revolt soon, and my people will be terribly oppressed. And, now that I think of it, I don't think I like boys that way-"

"Right." Naruto interrupted with a set frown, "Well, I must admit, I didn't consider any of those things when I met you in the forest. Bit 'spur-of-the-moment', really."

The boy sat for a moment on his bed then, thinking deeply about the matter, as he was faced with the prince's saddened expression. Finally, Sasuke sighed. "Well, I guess we could give it a go..."

"Really?" The blonde asked excitedly, grinning widely at the boy, "You don't mind?"

"No, I suppose not." Sasuke relented, standing up as he faced the prince, "But you have to respect my boundaries. And I want to be respected. No more of this eating my food and hogging the pillows rubbish."

"Right! You got it!" Naruto replied jovially, and they made their way out of the house the boy had lived in.

They then took leave of the boy's father, and got into the coach with eight horses, led by the frog-prince's faithful servant Heinrich, as was mentioned - and they all set out, full of joy and merriment, for the prince's kingdom, which they would reach safely; and live there happily for many years to come.

"I hope you know, though," Said the prince Naruto, as they travelled, to his husband-to-be, "That I'm the seme. Every time. No exceptions."

Sasukes face paled.

And they lived, happily ever after.

Sort of.

...

The End.

A/N: I will never surrender.

-Emerald-