A/N: Reviews are loved by the author my friends.

Five Times Severus Snape Almost Told Lily How He Felt About Her, But Didn't

The first time that Severus Snape realized he loved Lily was September first, the day of their sorting. The entire summer had been spent in anticipation for that particular day, and Severus was determined to make it the best. No longer would they be separated by things like distance, parents, Petunia- it'd all go away. They'd be sorted into the same house, no matter which one that would be, and they could spend every moment of their magical lives together. Severus wanted that. He wanted to share every important facet of his life with her. Anything that they could do, he desired. Their sorting was the perfect moment to tell her.

In just a few short hours they'd both experienced more magic than they ever had in their entire lives combined. Severus' father didn't much tolerate magic, and the only thing remotely magical his mom ever did was crush up potion ingredients for future research. Needless to say Lily herself could only listen to the tales of magical encounters, as back at her Muggle home she had no way of accessing any of it.

Through the barrier, onto the train, after they had ditched the compartment with those plonker Gryffindors, they'd had the time of their life. They'd opened and released boxes upon boxes of Chocolate Frogs, dared each other to try the most mysterious colored of Bertie Botts, and had a bubble blowing contest with a least a handful of little blue spheres called Droobles. It had started out as a day to remember and progressed into a day he never wanted to end.

They soon hopped out of the train and followed the school's gamekeeper to the edge of the lake, where a small fleet of boats resided. Lily and Severus clambered into one, followed by two other boys they'd never seen, but who introduced themselves as Avery and Lestrange- Pureblood Wizards. The sight of the Hogwarts castle itself in the night, stars twinkling distantly in the sky, was so breathtakingly beautiful. What a spot to share their first kiss, Severus mused, and he made sure to keep note that that's where it would be.

Sooner than he would've liked, a stern witch was giving them a talking to on the cold, stone steps outside the Great Hall, and then she disappeared, leaving all the first years to wait. "Nervous?" Severus asked Lily, as he took in her fidgeting hands. She was also biting her lip, an action that affected him to ways even he didn't know. She just looked so... cute; with her wavy auburn hair falling down her back, and her emerald eyes staring in awe at all around them. She'd never been somewhere so populated with magic, and it was no doubt taking its toll.

She gazed at Severus momentarily before replying, "a little, yeah."

"Don't worry," Severus said, "you'll make a great witch." He knew that that couldn't have been the root of her worries, but it was something that he felt he had to reassure. It was true, of course, there was nothing Lily was bad at. She could succeed at anything she had in mind, and he had absolute faith in her. "Uh, Lily." he asked, suddenly feeling his stomach drop to his ankles, as he prepared to let her know his feelings.

"Yes?"

"I just wanted to say that... well, it's come to my attention that... that you and I, that we've-"

At that moment the witch came back, calling out, "form a line!" and leading them into the Hall. Severus gulped in relief, though his insides were still swarming with butterflies. Lily grasped his arm hurriedly and squeaked, "we're going in!"

As the doors swung open and they were led in, Severus was reminded eerily of the main attraction at a Muggle circus, like one that Lily had invited him to previously. Everyone was staring at them from four different tables, along with the teacher's table at the head. The butterflies in his stomach wouldn't let up, but maybe that was because Lily was still clinging to him as they stopped before the front table. A hat- the Sorting hat- was placed on a stool already there. Before he could turn to Lily and make a comment about how grimy it was, and how he would never let such a thing touch his head (which might've elicited a giggle from the girl), it broke out into a song that had even Severus baffled. His mother had told him many, but not all, of the wonders at Hogwarts, and he was clapping heartily by its end.

"Severus," Lily said as the sorting began, her hands finding their way to his and giving them a squeeze. "Whatever happens... we're still friends."

Severus nodded at this statement, a little dumbfounded at her pattern of thoughts; but just then he noticed that, "Edgecombe, Elizabeth!" had been sorted into Ravenclaw house, and Evans, Lily must be next.

I love you, Severus thought, but he must not have said it aloud, because Lily was called then and her shaky legs were taking her to the stool. The hat was being placed on her head, and seconds later (if not hours) it was calling out, "GRYFFINDOR!"

The world slowed down. The clapping muted. Lily was in Gryffindor, with one of those boys patting her back and cheering her on, and the house ghost was already sliding its way over to introduce himself. She didn't even look back over at Severus, and the flush was residing from her cheeks as she began watching the sorting in earnest.

Severus had lost his chance. Because after Shacklebot, and Skeeter, and Smith- Snape was called. And he'd been placed in Slytherin. He looked over at Lily as he made his way to the Slytherin table, where a sixth-year blond boy patted his shoulder in admission. She seemed to be trying to convey her earlier message, "We're still friends."

But even though Severus was exactly where he wanted to be, it wasn't with Lily.