Sun shining, birds singing...Grunkle Stan nowhere in sight...nothing could go wrong today. Or at least, that's what Dipper thought. But if you live in a cartoon, or a book, or a movie, or any work of fiction ever, if that thought crosses your mind you are automatically doomed. So much for that perfect day.
Mabel was contentedly playing with Waddles on the TV room floor, while Dipper and Soos were actually watching TV. It was just some stupidly entertaining game show, but it was entertaining, so why not? No one had seen Wendy since her lunch break three hours ago, either, but no one really cared. They all figured she'd gone up to the roof or snuck out with her friends or something, perfectly normal, especially when the weather was nice. Grunkle Stan...well, nobody knew where he was, but he was out of sight for the day and that meant they could neglect their chores and shopkeeping duties and he wouldn't notice. So, perfect day formula right there. If only Wendy was there, they day would be oh so much more perfect. But of course, as Dipper was about to learn...when you live in a work of fiction, your thoughts can be powerful weapons...or simply the cause of really, really idiotic events. Including what was just about to happen.
Just as the game show ended, the bell of the door to the shop jingled and the door slammed shut, and someone, in a flash of red, green, and blue skidded to a halt in front of the TV and seized control over the remote before anyone had a chance to ask what was going on or protest about the remote being taken. It was only when they saw who'd taken it that they shut their mouths in surprise, because the girl in front of them was defiantly Wendy...but...changed. A lot.
Her long red hair was now shorter, and so was she, and her hair was tied back almost at the top of her head, which was lacking a hat. Her green shirt was replaced, but with a smaller version of it, tied up at the front to reveal some of her stomach. She was wearing cuffed denim jean shorts, and her boots had been replaced with black flip-flops. And she had braces. She switched the channel, sat cross-legged in front of the boys, and began watching some stupid cartoon about a human named Finn and his dog Jake.
"...Wendy?" Asked Dipper. He was almost holding his breath at this point, and Soos was too...simply out of confusion. Mabel was clueless as usual, still playing with Waddles who now mysteriously had one of her sweaters on.
"Yuh-huh, that's me," the young Wendy said, too occupied in the show to tear her eyes away to reply properly. At one point she even said the line right along with the characters as they said something about adventuring.
"Why are you...young?" Dipper managed to choke out. Soos had become occupied in the show as well; his eyes glued to the screen (not literally, thank goodness. The last time that happened they needed a new TV...and a new bottle of glue).
"Run-in with a..." Wendy trailed off as a battle started on-screen. Dipper groaned and snatched the remote, turning off the television. Wendy (and Soos) turned to him in shock.
"Why are you young?" Dipper said, slightly annoyed and much stronger this time. Wendy snatched the remote back, clearly not pleased.
"Run-in with a genie. Apparently, if you wish just the right things in just the right sequence, you're pretty much doomed."
"What'cha wish for?" Asked Soos eagerly.
"Well, I started out by wishing I knew the forecast. I was just joking, but then he said 'ninety-nine point nine nine nine percent chance of total destruction', so I didn't ask for it back. Then I wished I knew what to wish for, and the right thing all of a sudden popped into my head, and I wished I didn't have to grow up, because why should I want to grow up and get a job if I already hate the one I have? And then I ended up like this. Can I keep watching TV now?" Without waiting for an answer, she turned the show back on. And Dipper left the room.
"Genies, genies, genies..."
He continuously mumbled to himself as he flipped through the pages in the journal. Of course, just his luck, there didn't seem to be anything on genies in the journal. He slammed his face on the book, groaning and causing his hat to fall off.
"Dipper, what are you doing?"
"Aahhh!" Dipped exclaimed, surprised so much that he fumbled with the book until it fell off the bed, along with his hat. "Mabel!"
"Seriously. Isn't this just what you've been waiting for?" She said, taking the sweater off Waddles and forcing him in a dress with a tu-tu. Dipper looked down as he picked up the journal and his hat.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he said, matter-of-factly. Mabel flashed him a metal smile and got all up in his face.
"Yes, yes you do. Wendy's the same age as you now, she's broken up with Robbie, and here you are, doing absolutely nothing. C'mon, you know what I'm gonna saaayyyyy!"
"No I dooooonnn't!" Dipper placed his fingers in his ears as he tried to turn the pages of the journal with his elbows, and when that failed, his toes. Eventually he just gave up and slammed the book shut. "Okay, fine. It's just...I suck at this stuff. You're gonna need to help me."
And then Mabel grinned like she had just won the lottery.
'Just ask her to go on the roof or something, get to talking...and BLAMO, somehow you ask her on a date. It's FOOL PROOF!' Dipper kept repeating Mabel's words in his head. Somehow, he had a feeling it wasn't all that fool proof. Actually, now that he thought about it, there were about a thousand things wrong with that plan. Which reminded him of another thing Mabel said:
'Whatever you do, don't worry. It just makes you nervous and nervous makes you sweat. And nothing's worse than a sweaty first date.'
Dipper had just begun to question Mabel's advice when he realized that he was already back. Soos and Wendy were still sitting on the floor watching the silly cartoon, and Dipper decided exactly what he was going to do. He walked over and sat next to Wendy, and waited for the end of the episode and for a commercial to come on before speaking.
"Uh..." Dipper cleared his throat. "Hey. Wanna go up to the roof?" He asked. Wendy smiled, but then her face fell.
"As long as Soos doesn't have to come with. I mean, he's a cool guy and all, but..." she whispered the last part. "...sometimes I don't think he's perfectly sane."
This comment was proven when Soos set the remote on top of the television, telling it to "dude, stay!" Dipper quickly nodded and the two made their way up to the roof.
It was only about three-thirty, which meant the sun was still pretty high up in the sky. Dipper still had an entire day before things went haywire...or so he thought. Work of fiction thing again.
"So..." Said Dipper, rather uncertainly. "Whaddaya wanna do?" Wendy didn't reply, and Dipper turned around to see her climbing up further on the roof. She had just hoisted herself up to the "H" in "SHACK".
"What's the fun of being on the roof if that's as far as ya go?" She yelled down. Dipper looked back up at her nervously. "C'mon, don't be chicken! Climb up!" Dipper's face took on a determined look as he searched for footholds and handholds he could use to climb up. After a little bit of struggling, the two had made it up to the very top of the building and were sitting where the roof met in a point. Of course, Wendy didn't stop there...she stood up and walked tip-toe over to the edge and looked out at the view. Miles and miles of pine forest, lake and mountains in the distance.
"Dipper! You gotta see this!" She yelled, not moving or turning her head. Dipper crawled over by her feet and look at the view. He'd seen many amazing things but this was something different entirely. And it wasn't trying to bite his head off. Wendy and Dipper were silent for a few moments as they admired the scenery, but then Wendy turned around. "Well, that was nice," she said. Then she slid down the side of the roof, causing many shingles to dislodge, and swung on a tree, landing squarely on the ground with a light "thud". Dipper tried to do the same...but only ended up sliding down clumsily on his back and belly-flopping to the ground. This caused Wendy to burst out into a highly contagious fit of laughter, which Dipper eventually joined in as he stood up and brushed himself off.
"You're halarious Dipper!" Wendy exclaimed. Dipper laughed more, awkwardly. And then, just as I've been saying for the whole story, he thought the one thing he should never think. This day couldn't be more perfect. Because right then, fireballs started raining down. Dipper and Wendy looked up, and saw a blue genie shooting them out of his hands and screaming "THANK YOU WENDY CORDUROY!"
"What? What did I have to do with this?" Wendy asked. The genie stopped for a moment to explain.
"All I had to do to graduate genie school and get my genie powers was grant three wishes. You had three wishes for me to grant, and now that I have my genie powers, I can destroy EVERYTHING!"
"Everything? Isn't that a little harsh?" Dipper asked. He was met with a very loud, ear-drum blasting "YES!" in reply.
Fingers in their ears, Dipper and Wendy ran inside and, Wendy following, ran up to Dipper and Mabel's room. Fumbling through the journal, Dipper flipped through every single last page, looking for one on genies. Of course, he only found it when he realized that there were two pages stuck together and he un-stuck them.
"Wishes...how to trick a genie into giving you unlimited wishes...ah-ha!" Dipper exclaimed. "How to kill a genie!" He skimmed through it, Wendy reading over his shoulder, and then their eyes grew wide in fright as the turned to each other and exclaimed at the same time:
"THERE'S NO WAY TO KILL A GENIE!"
Reading allowed, Dipper continued skimming through the entry. "The only way to stop a genie is to revoke your wishes. The only way to do this is to go back in time and create a paradox that cancels your current self out, causing the you that didn't make the wishes to be the only one to exist. But, there is the issue of time travel." He read the next part loudest. "If you have a second person, they can wish for a time machine and you won't have a problem. Thirty seconds after the wishes have been stopped, the other you that made the wishes will disappear and cease to exist."
"But...if another person can make more wishes, can't they just wish for the genie to stop?" Wendy asked. Dipper shrugged and closed the journal, then grabbing a stopwatch in one of Mabel's drawers. He put it around his neck and opened the window.
"HEY! GENIE!" He shouted. The genie stopped shooting fireballs for a second (in retrospect, they probably shouldn't be inside the Mystery Shack because it was made of wood. Oh well).
"Whaddaya want?" He asked.
"You can still give me three wishes, right?"
"Yeah..."
"I wish you'd stop destroying everything!" Dipper said confidently. But of course, the journal was right about everything.
"No can do!" The genie said. Then he laughed evilly and continued shooting. Dipper's face fell.
"I guess you have to wish for a time machine, huh?" Wendy said, a bit sadly. Dipper said nothing but pushed his head out the window.
"I WISH FOR A TIME MACHINE!" He yelled strongly. The genie, not thinking anything of it, snapped his fingers and a rather thick black watch appeared with a small flash of light on his wrist. Setting the date and time to when Wendy left for her lunch break, they teleported away in a flash of light.
Staying hidden, they watched as older Wendy walked out of the Shack, got a milkshake to go and walked around town as she drank it. Then she bumped into the same blue genie that was destroying the town in their time right now. Before she could say anything, young Wendy jumped out and grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the Mystery Shack.
"What?!" Older Wendy asked. "Who are you?!"
"I'm you from the future," young Wendy said. "Dipper? Time?"
"Twenty seconds and you're gone," Dipper said, adrenaline masking any sadness in his voice.
"But if you're from the future, why are you younger than me?" Wendy asked, baffled.
"Complicated," young Wendy said. Stopping, she turned and hugged Dipper quickly. "Goodbye, Dipper. I had a lot of fun today," she said, and then the paradox made her vanish.
"So, you did all that because the genie that had just graduated was destroying the world?" Wendy said, laughing. Night was just falling and Dipper had explained the whole thing to her. She could hardly believe it. Their legs dangled off of the roof as fireflies started to blink around them.
"Yeah...I did, and I should probably get back to my own time now. Actually, it's the past at this point," Dipper said, sadly. "It was the future when I got here."
He set the watch to the correct date and time and was just about to press the activate button when Wendy kissed his cheek. His finger slipped and he pressed the button, teleporting back to the right time. And when he arrived, he nearly fainted onto his bed.
To all of you who were wondering, yes, young Wendy WAS watching Adventure Time. And I don't think it's stupid. I just called it that for the sake of storytelling.