Ripples
Sometimes, Phoenix thought, it was a shame the death penalty still existed. Because it meant he couldn't hunt down Manfred von Karma and slap him about a bit.
He'd gone to the Prosecutors Office to pick up an autopsy report from Edgeworth when the earthquake struck. And he'd just managed to coax the man out from under his desk when the aftershock began.
And as if that wasn't enough to turn the Demon Prosecutor into a gibbering puddle of jelly, the lights had gone out. Edgeworth had hyperventilated himself into unconsciousness and now Phoenix was staggering around in the dark, looking for help and wondering how bad an idea it would be to get Maya to channel the man responsible for Edgeworth's phobia so he could punch him in the face.
Somehow he made it to the doorway without crippling himself on the furniture. The hallway outside had emergency lighting, and he hoped if he could wedge the door open, it would give him enough light to find the telephone.
Except it looked like he wouldn't have to stumble back across Edgeworth's office in the dark, because directly in front of him was a large, blue wooden box with the words 'Police Public Call Box' written across the top.
Perfect.
He pulled on the handle that promised assistance if pulled, revealing an old fashioned phone. Which didn't work. The earthquake must have knocked down the lines, he decided. He tried the door handle out of curiosity – perhaps there was a torch inside he could use?
"What the-?!"
OK. He was dreaming. He must have hit his head. He stepped back and walked around the blue box, then stepped inside in amazement. It was bigger on the inside. And the inside looked… well, kind of like the coral reef in Finding Nemo. Crossed with the deck of the Starship Enterprise. Crossed with the contents of a garden shed. Was that a bicycle pump attached to that monitor over there?
There was a door on the other side of the room and he walked towards it, dazed. Perhaps there was a torch somewhere through there? Or Narnia. Either seemed entirely possible at that moment in time.
/\/\/\
It seemed like hours before he managed to find his way back to the main room. He'd found a costume room, three stories high. He'd found a gigantic laboratory filled with things he wasn't even sure were physically possible. He'd found a swimming pool that would've sent Damon Gant into spasms of joy, if only he'd been alive to see it. He'd found a copy of the eighth Harry Potter book, an Olympic torch, a newspaper dated thirty-five years in the future, a jar containing something that looked like Gourdy's cousin, and a crystal ball that screamed at him.
He hadn't found a torch though. Once he stepped back outside, he was relieved to find one wasn't necessary anyway because the lights were working.
For some reason, he was in the Court building. But considering how many corridors and stairs he'd walked along in the box, he wasn't too upset about it.
He started walking towards the main entrance with the intention of returning to the Prosecutors Office and checking to see how mad Edgeworth was with him for leaving him alone, when his ears pricked at the mention of his friend's name.
"…get you down, Mr Edgeworth," someone said behind him. "It's his first penalty in twenty-five years, that's something to be proud of."
"Yeah, you were brilliant, Dad."
Phoenix spun around fast enough to make himself dizzy, and then rubbed his eyes in disbelief. He recognised those people. But it wasn't possible. Two of them were dead and the other one was out cold on the floor of an office across town.
Dazed and confused, he watched Yanni Yogi, Gregory Edgeworth and his nine year-old son Miles walk towards him, discussing what he realised was that fateful case against Manfred von Karma. The one that had ended in von Karma's first ever strike in court.
Right at that moment, von Karma was wandering the halls, also dazed and confused, Phoenix realised. In five hours, he was going to open the door of an elevator and destroy the lives of the three unconscious people inside.
There was no way he could let that happen. As the bailiff pressed the elevator call button, Phoenix found himself charging towards them. "Stop! You can't use that elevator!"
The trio looked curiously at him. "Why not?" the senior Edgeworth asked.
"It's broken," he lied.
Just to spite him, the elevator dinged behind him and opened its doors, invitingly. "Er, I mean, the control panel's busted," he said, feeling his face burn in embarrassment. "It keeps stopping on the wrong floors. You'd be better off using the stairs."
Yogi shrugged. "All right."
Actually, Phoenix realised, that was still too dangerous. While von Karma was still pacing the building, Gregory Edgeworth was in danger. Plus there was the earthquake to think about. "Actually, you've had a pretty exciting day, haven't you, sir?" he babbled, grabbing the Edgeworth's by the shoulders and steering them away from the elevators. "Why don't you take Miles out for a celebration burger or something? There's a great burger bar over by the Police headquarters."
Gregory looked oddly at him but allowed himself to be pulled along the hallway. "That's miles away."
Exactly, Phoenix thought grimly. "And then you should go home. And maybe take a holiday for a few days, give Prosecutor von Karma time to get over his shock."
With one last shove, he pushed father and son out of the building and smiled smugly to himself as they exchanged baffled glances and walked away. Disaster averted.
Now he had a chance to dwell on the fact that he'd somehow been transported back in time. He had a feeling that bizarre blue box was to blame.
/\/\/\
When Phoenix stepped back into the police box, he allowed himself to smirk smugly for several seconds before wondering how on Earth he was supposed to back to the future when he didn't even know how he'd ended up in the past in the first place.
Before he could give himself a headache thinking about it, the front door opened and a man in a brown pinstriped suit, with hair almost as spiky as his own stepped inside. He froze when he saw Phoenix standing there and then carefully placed the machine he was holding onto the central computer thing.
"Er… can I help you?" the stranger asked.
He decided to start with the small stuff. "This is bigger than the outside."
"Really?!" the man said in a tone that left Phoenix with the uncomfortable feeling that he was being mocked. Pinstripes gave the room an almost comical once over. "My goodness, you're right. How did I miss that?"
Before Phoenix could get annoyed, the stranger stuck out a hand in offering and grinned widely. "Sorry. Couldn't help myself. I'm the doctor. You are?"
Phoenix shook the offered hand. "Phoenix Wright. Er… doctor who exactly?"
"Just the Doctor. Nice badge. Lawyer? So. What brings you onto the good ship TARDIS?" the Doctor asked before Phoenix could answer the question.
"Um…"
"Sorry. But I'm going to have to ask you to leave, actually." The Doctor looked apologetically at him. "I'm looking for this thing. Well. Several things. Zygons. And a lake monster. Well, it's really a robot, not a monster. And I'm not in the right place. Or the right time, actually. I was before, but somehow I've been drawn off course and I really do have to get going or the Earth will get sucked inside out and that's always such a pain to fix."
Phoenix waited a moment to make sure he'd actually stopped talking before opening his mouth again. "This is a time machine, right?"
"Very good!" The Doctor looked impressed. "How did you know? Yes, this is a TARDIS, a model 40 to be exact, last of her kind." He stroked the wall lovingly. "Aren't you, my darling?" he cooed.
"Well, it's the past out there," Phoenix said quickly before the Doctor could start talking again.
The Doctor peeled his gaze away from the wall and narrowed his eyes at the attorney. "Did you… stow away in my TARDIS?!" he said accusingly.
"No!" Phoenix replied, offended. "I was looking for help. There was an earthquake and the lights went out."
The Doctor let out a long suffering sigh. "Fine. I suppose I'll give you a lift home. When did you come aboard?"
He glanced at his watch. "About two hours ago."
"I meant what year, you numpty."
Oops. "2019," Phoenix corrected. "November second, about half past eight in the evening."
"Righty-ho!" The Doctor pulled on a lever, turned a wheel, pumped the bicycle pump and then held his finger over a button. "Hold on tight, this could get rough."
/\/\/\
A few minutes and seventeen years later, Phoenix staggered out of the TARDIS and tried not to fall over on his face. The lights had come on since he'd been gone, which was a relief. The Doctor stepped out behind him, looking none the worse for wear, and sniffed the air experimentally. "Here we are then, 2019. Enjoy the rest of your life. You might want to take a holiday next June, there's going to be an outbreak of GUILT. Nasty stuff. Shreds you up from the inside out. Everyone lives though."
Something inside the TARDIS dinged and the Doctor clapped his hands together happily. "Right! Zygons! Must dash. Bye!"
Phoenix straightened up and watched the Doctor slam the door to the impossible box. A light on top began to flash and then with a groaning mechanical noise, it simply… disappeared.
He stared at the space it had been for a few seconds before shaking his head to clear it. "Weird."
Right. Now to go get that autopsy report. And now Edgeworth had no reason to be afraid of earthquakes, so Phoenix fully expected him to be conscious and waiting back at his office.
He pushed the door open, and then frowned in confusion. No Edgeworth.
In fact, the office didn't even LOOK like Edgeworth's. The framed suit was gone, as was the chess set and the pink drapes and matching sofa. Instead, the furniture was dark and heavy and the windows were framed in blue.
Phoenix blinked for a moment, and then suddenly grinned. Of course this wasn't Edgeworth's office. If Gregory Edgeworth lived, that meant Miles never ended up training under Manfred von Karma. Which meant instead of becoming a prosecutor, he'd probably followed his childhood dream of becoming a defence lawyer instead. Maybe they'd even studied together. Maybe they ran an office together! "Wright, Edgeworth and Co," Phoenix said aloud. He liked the sound of that.
He left the building and began to head for home. His bicycle was missing, but he figured in this reality, he hadn't needed to go to the Prosecutors Office, so it would probably be at home, waiting for him. Resolving to Google Edgeworth as soon as he'd had something to eat, he climbed the stairs to his apartment and tried to put his key in the lock.
OK, that was strange. His key didn't work. He looked at it, then at the door, and then knocked tentatively.
A few moments later, it was opened by a middle-aged woman in a dressing gown. "What?"
"Er.." Phoenix scratched his head. "I live here?" he said hopefully.
She narrowed her eyes at him. "No you don't. Get lost before I call the police."
"Right. My mistake," he said quickly, stepping backwards. "I'll… get a room somewhere."
He walked away quickly in case she changed her mind and wondered what to do next. Perhaps it was possible if Edgeworth had never had to move away and they'd maybe studied law together, maybe it was also possible they'd decided to rent a place together?
Or maybe in this reality he'd simply decided to live somewhere else.
Anyway, he decided, there was an easy way to find out his past history. Two ways, actually. Wikipedia was one. His personnel folder at the office was another. And he could kill two birds with one stone by going to the office and using the computer there.
Except when he arrived at the building that housed Wright and Co, he was in for another surprise.
The building was empty.
/\/\/\
Phoenix simply stared at the TO LET (actually TOiLET, thanks to some imaginative graffiti) signs on the disused office block for a few moments in disbelief. Because that was… VERY strange. Even if he'd joined a different law company, the block should still house Fey and Co.
He sat down on the steps outside for a few moments in contemplation before finally arriving at a possible reason. Mia must have still been murdered. And if he really had joined another company, or perhaps even started his own with Edgeworth, that meant there had been no-one to take over the business. Which explained the TO LET signs.
Of course, there could be any other number of reasons. It was fast becoming clear to Phoenix that he couldn't simply guess at what had changed. He was going to need to book a motel room, sleep, and then find out where he lived and where he worked.
He considered trying his credit card at the Gatewater Hotel, but ultimately decided against it. He didn't want to find out that he used a different bank and be arrested for credit card fraud. A quick search of his wallet revealed a condom of dubious age, an expired coupon for Blockbusters and forty-three dollars and seven cents. It was going to have to be a very cheap motel indeed.
/\/\/\
A combination of itchy sheets and a very loud, very happy couple in the next room meant that Phoenix got very little sleep that night. When he first woke up, he was half-convinced he'd dreamed the whole, surreal incident until he walked back to the offices of Fey-slash-Wright and Co and discovered them still abandoned.
OK. Not a dream. His next stop was the nearest phone booth.
A quick flick through the phone book showed no entries for P. Wright, M. Edgeworth, M. Fey or any of those surnames attached to any law companies. It was really quite annoying. How was he supposed to do any detective work if he had nowhere to start from?
Detective… "Detective Gumshoe!" Phoenix said aloud. The man knew himself, Edgeworth and Mia and his employment was hardly likely to have changed in this reality. And even if it turned out that the Gumshoe in this world was a security guard or a janitor, the police department was sure to have the answers he needed. He shoved the phone book back on its shelf and set off at a brisk walk towards the Police Headquarters.
"Does Dick Gumshoe work here?" he asked the woman behind the desk when he finally arrived, sweaty and out of breath.
She wrinkled her nose in distaste at his appearance, but his attorney badge still did its trick and she pointed towards a door. "He's through there."
And there he was. Large as life and petting Missile. Phoenix was so happy to finally see a familiar face that he almost hugged him. Gumshoe glanced up at him as he approached and smiled welcomingly. "Can I help you, pal?"
Phoenix wondered where to begin. "Um… I have a few questions…" he began hesitantly. "This probably sounds a bit silly, but… do you know who I am?" he asked hopefully.
Gumshoe shook his head. "Never seen you before in my life, pal."
Drat. OK. Question two. "Do you know a woman called Mia Fey? She might be a law…" He trailed off as Gumshoe shook his head again. Oh dear. This wasn't going well at all. He crossed his fingers behind his back and prayed silently. "Do you know Miles Edgeworth?"
Gumshoe grinned broadly and nodded. "Course I know Miles Edgeworth, pal," he said happily. "Why, everyone here knows him."
Hurrah! Success at last!
"Why, I arrested him just yesterday. Thirty-second time this year!"
/\/\/\
There was so much wrong with that statement that for several seconds, Phoenix lost the power of speech. "Thu-thirty second time?" he finally croaked.
Gumshoe chuckled. "Yeah. It's a new personal record. I think he's making up for last year."
"Last year?" Phoenix repeated.
"Yeah. Prosecutor von Karma finally managed to get him a jail sentence," Gumshoe explained. "So he only managed to get arrested twelve times."
"Von Karma?" Phoenix repeated, realising belatedly that he was beginning to sound like a broken record.
Gumshoe didn't notice though. It seemed that even in this reality, even though he was no longer on the side of justice, the man was more than happy to talk about Miles Edgeworth. "It's always a great show when Prosecutor von Karma takes the stand against Edgeworth," he said enthusiastically. "He's the only person who's ever defeated von Karma in trial. The first time, they actually had to sedate him after he nearly bashed his own brains in against the wall." He chuckled at the memory. "So, are you gonna defend him tomorrow, pal?"
Phoenix glanced down at his badge. "Huh? Oh. Um. Yeah. I guess." It was a lie, but so long as it kept Gumshoe talking, who cared? "But… correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought Edgeworth was a lawyer himself?"
Gumshoe scratched his head thoughtfully. "Well… I guess he is. Sort of. I mean, if he thinks you're going to lose his case, he'll fire you and represent himself, but he's not really legally a lawyer. Anyway, here's the file."
Phoenix flicked through the court record and then rubbed his temples. He could feel a migraine coming on. "Thirty two times?" he muttered again in disbelief. "Why? What does he do?"
"Burglary, mostly. Vandalism, breech of the peace, joyriding, accessory to various crimes," Gumshoe listed. "Just petty crime. He does it for fun. Says representing himself is the only way he'll get to be a defence lawyer. Come on, pal, I'll lead you to the detention area."
OK. Somewhere along the line, Edgeworth had completely lost his marbles. "I don't get it. Why didn't he just go to college?" Phoenix asked, flicking through Edgeworth's arrest record as they walked along, in morbid curiosity.
"Couldn't afford to," Gumshoe said bluntly.
Phoenix frowned. Sure, Gregory Edgeworth hadn't been anywhere near as wealthy as von Karma, but from what he remembered, he certainly had the means to put his son through college. "Why not? Did his dad cut him off or something?"
Gumshoe shook his head sadly. "His parents are dead."
Phoenix stopped walking and stared at Gumshoe in disbelief. "What? Dead? But… how?"
Irritatingly, Gumshoe chose that moment to observe social niceties. He scratched the back of his head and looked away, embarrassed. "Well. Not really my place to say, pal."
"I can look it up on the internet, you might as well tell me," Phoenix said, annoyed.
"Well…" After several seconds of painful thought, Gumshoe relented. "His mom died during childbirth. Then his dad got cancer when he was ten. Sold his house and used all his savings to pay the medical bills too."
Now that just wasn't fair. And after he'd gone to all that trouble to stop the man's murder too. But if von Karma had nothing to do with Gregory Edgeworth dying this time… "So what happened to Edgeworth then?" Phoenix asked.
"Foster care," Gumshoe said simply. "Then menial work as soon as he got his own place. The stuff that barely pays enough to make the rent, let alone fund college. It's a shame, really. He's a lousy crook, but he's got a brilliant legal mind."
He pushed open the door to the detention center and stepped aside to let Phoenix past. "Wait here. I'll go and get your client."
/\/\/\
When Miles Edgeworth entered the room, Phoenix could only stare. Gone was the frilly cravat and pink suit. Instead, the man wore torn jeans and a leather jacket. The floppy bangs had been cut short. There was stubble on his face. It was a shock to the system, like seeing the Queen of England in a velour tracksuit and cloth slippers. The only thing that remained the same was the 'touch me and I'll kill you' expression on his face as he sat down and waited for Phoenix to do the same.
Finally Phoenix flopped onto his chair and picked up the phone that would allow them to communicate. "Um...hi," he said weakly.
"What do you want?" Edgeworth said, sounding bored.
Phoenix found himself relaxing slightly; Edgeworth always sounded bored when he spoke to him, it was strangely reassuring to know he behaved the same way now. "I want to defend you."
Edgeworth laughed. "No thanks, Tigre. I saw the lousy job you did with that waitress."
Phoenix frowned, baffled yet again, until he realised he had been mistaken for his doppelganger. "No, I'm not Furio Tigre, it's me! Phoenix Wright!" he added, at the dumbfounded look on his friend's face.
He wasn't really sure what reaction he'd expected, but it certainly wasn't for Edgeworth to hang up the phone and stand to leave. He pounded on the glass and motioned for Edgeworth to pick up the phone again. "Just joking," he said weakly when the other man finally relented. "Of course I'm Furio Tigre."
"You make an even worse comedian than a defence lawyer," Edgeworth grumbled, glaring daggers at him.
There was an uncomfortable silence for several seconds as Phoenix thought desperately for something to say. "So, um, why did you get mad?" he said finally. "I thought you'd be pleased to see your old friend."
Edgeworth scowled and Phoenix was suddenly glad for the thick glass between them. "Yes, I'd be simply thrilled for the walking corpse of my old friend to stroll in for a chat," he said in a voice heavy with sarcasm. "Perhaps I could get my dad to represent me in court, too. And then I could be sectioned!"
Edgeworth's mouth continued to move, but Phoenix couldn't hear anything over the pounding blood in his ears. "Cu-corpse?!" he squeaked, horrified. "I… he's dead?!"
"You're still not funny," Edgeworth snapped.
He slammed the phone down and once again, Phoenix found himself banging frantically on the glass. But this time, Edgeworth ignored him and strode out of the room without a backwards glance.
/\/\/\
Phoenix staggered out of the detention area and sought refuge in a deserted restroom. He locked the door behind him and then sank to the ground, trying to sort out the mess in his head.
OK. Take a deep breath and start from the beginning, he told himself sternly. He'd prevented DL-6. But he hadn't managed to stop Edgeworth from losing his father. And without von Karma there to bring him up as part of his twisted revenge, he'd become a lawless thug who got arrested for fun.
And as if that wasn't bad enough, he was dead. Which REALLY sucked.
Eventually, he stood up, splashed some water on his face and glared at himself in the mirror. "Right, you," he told himself sternly. "First things first. Find out exactly what happened to you. Then… I dunno, go back to Edgeworth and tell him you faked your death and keep him out of jail. Then… then find out what happened to Mia. Actually, find out what happened to Mia after you find out what happened to you, because we sure could use her help. Then… seek professional help because you're talking to yourself in the mirror, although after the day you've had, it's really no surprise you're going crazy."
He stepped back, nodded at his reflection in satisfaction and left the room.
/\/\/\
Despite laying on his charm, Gumshoe refused to allow Phoenix to use the police computers, so he took yet another trip across town, this time to the court. If he really was dead, then there would be a copy of his death certificate. And if there wasn't, well, it'd make it a whole lot easier to say he'd faked it.
Except it didn't look like he'd be able to bluff his way out of it, he realised sadly half an hour later as he read the document proving he'd been executed for the murder of Doug Swallow some five years previously.
It didn't make sense. Mia had proved his innocence! Why had saving Edgeworth's dad stopped her saving him? She didn't even know Edgeworth until she'd worked opposite him in the Terry Fawles case-
He inhaled sharply and began hunting for the case files for both his own case and the Terry Fawles one. That had to be where his past had altered.
Only it wasn't. Because Mia hadn't defended Terry Fawles. That job had fallen to a state-assigned attorney, who hadn't even bothered to call Dahlia Hawthorne to the stand. Baffled yet again, Phoenix began searching for any mention, anywhere of Mia Fey.
Eventually he had to admit defeat. He'd checked all the cases he could recall her working on and her name simply wasn't there. It was as if she'd never existed.
He sighed and sat back, deep in thought. Obviously Mia existed. He'd changed the past, but he'd changed it after she was born. So it wasn't as if he'd killed her grandfather or something. "Think outside the box," he muttered to himself. "Mia exists. There's no death certificate for her. But she isn't involved in any cases. Why?"
Finally the answer dawned on him. Mia wasn't listed on the case records because she hadn't taken part. And she hadn't taken part because… "She never became a lawyer. Because her mother never disappeared. Because DL-6 never happened."
He groaned and let his head flop into his hands. "Oh crap."
Now what? He was trapped in a world where his mentor – and therefore her sister – didn't know he existed. Edgeworth was a criminal mastermind working on a world record for most arrests in a year. Larry Butz was awaiting execution for the murder of Cindy Stone because he, Phoenix Wright, had died before ever becoming a lawyer.
And to top it all off, Gregory Edgeworth had STILL gone and died when Miles was a child.
He could safely say there was no way he could be more screwed.
/\/\/\
There was no way Phoenix could afford another motel room for that night, so he spent it in the airport. It was warm and dry and it had restrooms and places to sit. He knew he couldn't stay there indefinitely though. The staff would start to recognise him and he'd be kicked out. Or worse still, arrested. Which was something he wanted to avoid seeing as he was a convicted felon. A dead one at that.
As far as he could tell, he had very few options.
He could walk up to one of the security desks and claim to be a refugee from somewhere, which would explain his lack of identification. The problem with that plan though was that they'd probably take his fingerprints. And when they matched up to those of a dead murderer, he'd be screwed.
He could just live on the streets for a while, doing cash-in-hand work and hope to eventually save up enough for a place to live. The problem with that plan though was that the prospect really sucked.
He could try and convince Edgeworth who he was and see if he could join him in his life of crime. Except if he ever got arrested there was once again the problem of his fingerprints. He could always do what Yanni Yogi had done and burn them off, but that seemed like it would be painful. Also he didn't really want to be a criminal. He had the feeling he would be really bad at it.
He could choose death.
Except he didn't really want to do that either. Apart from the bit where he'd gone back in time and accidentally killed himself, he kind of liked his life.
Which left one final option. Find the Doctor and beg him to help him put reality right again.
Now where do you begin to look for a man with no name who could be anywhere in time?
/\/\/\
The coffee was grossly overpriced and completely wiped out what was left of his cash, but once Phoenix was an official Starbucks customer, he was allowed to use the computers.
Typing 'doctor tardis police box' into Google brought up 12,000 results. He sipped his coffee and leaned forward, flexing his fingers on preparation for the search ahead.
"You!"
The exclamation made him jump violently. Four dollar hot coffee spilled down his poor, wrinkled suit and he whirled round to face… "Doctor!"
The Doctor glared at him. "I spent all day wandering around that stupid lake, looking for Zygons, and they're not there! No-one's even heard of Gourdy!" He began to pace up and down the coffee shop, drawing strange looks from other customers. "I KNEW something was wrong when we got back here, I could smell it. Disturbance in time. I should've checked it out." He suddenly stopped pacing and pointed an accusing finger at Phoenix. "You've gone and created a paradox, haven't you?!"
There were a few seconds of silence. Finally Phoenix realised the Doctor was actually allowing him to get a word in edgeways. "Er, yeah, I guess I did," he admitted, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment.
The Doctor massaged his forehead and groaned. "Humans. Incredible species, you really are. You create the Mona Lisa and Harry Potter and edible ball bearings, but it still never fails to amaze me how extraordinarily THICK you can be as well. What did you do? Prevent your parents from meeting? Kill your grandfather? Shag your grandmother?" There were a few sconds of silence while he glared at Phoenix some more. "Well?!" he snapped eventually.
"I thought you were just pausing for breath," Phoenix mumbled, uncomfortably aware that everyone in the room was listening to them. "I mean, I prevented a murder," he added hastily as the Doctor opened his mouth, probably to begin ranting some more. "But it meant my boss never became a lawyer. And I got convicted of murder – a different one – and she wasn't there to defend me and I got executed."
There was a long silence. The Doctor stared at him.
"I didn't actually murder anyone. I was framed by my ex-girlfriend," Phoenix explained after a while.
"You're an idiot," the Doctor said flatly. "You… butterflied yourself." His expression suddenly brightened. "Oooh, 'butterflied.' I like that. I'll remember that."
Then, like a light had been switched off, his face darkened again. "And no doubt I'll get a chance to use it in future. Nine hundred years of time travel and only one person has ever thought to ask about the consequences their actions can have."
"I only wanted my friend to stop being scared of earthquakes," Phoenix said meekly. He gazed at the Doctor beseechingly. "Can you fix things?"
"Of course I can fix things." The Doctor suddenly beamed at him, showing off a set of perfect, pearly white teeth. "I'm a professional."
/\/\/\
The court building still looked exactly the same as it did always when Phoenix and the Doctor stepped out of the TARDIS on December 28th, 2001. They made their way towards the elevators and then hid in a stairwell where they could see what was going on.
"Right. We've got about three minutes before I arrive for the first time," the Doctor said thoughtfully. "I'll walk off to find out where I am. I only stay for ten minutes, max. During that time, you leave the TARDIS, find your friend and stop him getting into the lift. Am I right so far?"
Phoenix nodded.
"OK. Now, this is going to be a weak point in time, with two sets of us being here at once." He fixed a steely gaze upon Phoenix. "During these few minutes, do. Not. Touch. Anything. Especially your other self."
Phoenix nodded again.
"I mean it," the Doctor said sternly. "We only get one shot at this. If something goes wrong, time will be damaged and giant bats will eat the universe. So TOUCH NOTHING."
"All right, I get it," Phoenix snapped.
"Yes, well, you haven't exactly proven yourself to be all that good at this stuff," the Doctor snapped back. "So I'll say it again. Stay out of sight and touch nothing. Once our old selves disappear, we've got seconds to get your friend, his dad and the bailiff back into the lift." He paused for a moment in thought. "Actually, forget what I said about touching nothing. I need you to hold the lift while I get your friend and his dad back. It's the only way we'll have time. But other than that, touch nothing. I'm not kidding about the giant bats."
Before Phoenix could say anything, there was a groaning, wheezing noise and the Doctor gripped his arm painfully. "That's it, that's my TARDIS arriving," he hissed, peeping around the corner.
Phoenix peeped as well and was eventually met with the surreal sight of himself walking out of the blue police box. He watched as his past self spoke to Gregory Edgeworth and his son, before pushing them out of the building.
"OK, this is it, go go go!" The Doctor shoved him out of their hiding place and ran frantically after the Edgeworth's.
Phoenix ran desperately towards the elevator and was just able to jam his foot in the door before it closed. It slid open, revealing Yanni Yogi. "Hello again. Going up?" the man asked him.
"Er, yeah, in a minute, just waiting for a friend." He glanced towards the doors. The Doctor was pushing the baffled Edgeworth's in front of him as fast as they would go.
"…absolutely imperative that we receive those forms by the end of the day," the Doctor said with a final shove.
"All right, Special Agent," Gregory said, scratching his head. "Er, are you coming up too?"
The Doctor shook his head. "Nah, can't stand enclosed spaces. I'll take the stairs."
"Me too," Phoenix added quickly, stepping out of the way. The doors closed and he watched the three perplexed people rise out of sight. He turned back to face the Doctor and opened his mouth to speak, when suddenly, the earth shook violently and all the lights went out.
/\/\/\
"Do you think it worked?" he asked once they were back on board the TARDIS.
The Doctor shrugged. "No giant bats. The TARDIS is intact. The universe is still here. So far, it's looking good." He pulled a lever, stepped around the console and began pressing buttons. "Of course, the real test will be when we get back to the present."
Phoenix nodded and settled down to wait.
"Yeah, but..." He sighed heavily. "We just sent a man to his death. And my boss is going to lose her mom because of it and end up murdered too. Both of them, that is, Mia and her mom. And then there's Yanni Yogi, he didn't do anything - well, this time - but his life's about to be ruined and his fiancée's going to die and he's going to kill someone too and oh my god what have I done?!"
The Doctor folded his arms and glared at Phoenix. "And that's exactly why this sort of thing should be left to professionals such as myself. You humans, you just go barging in and muck things up."
Unsurprisingly, Phoenix didn't look any more cheerful after having his species insulted and the Doctor sighed. "OK. Yes, it's sad that so many people are going to die. But they were never supposed to be alive anyway. Not in this world." He sat down next to Phoenix and waved a hand about. "It's true what they say. For every desicion made, a parallel world exists where the other choice was made. Somewhere out there, all those people are still alive."
"Yeah?"
The Doctor nodded. "In fact, somewhere out there is a world where everyone made the right choices. There's no accidents, no murders and all the celebrities are fantastic role models." He frowned suddenly. "It's a bit dull, actually. Anyway!" he exclaimed, jumping to his feet. "My point is, somewhere out there, the world you saw still exists. And anyway, there's a whole lot of people who just came back from the dead because of what we just changed. You, for a start."
Phoenix nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess. And hey, there's a lot of criminals going to jail because I'm still alive," he added proudly.
The Doctor smiled. "See? Not all so bad after all, is it?" He glanced at another monitor and whipped out a pair of spectacles to take a closer look. "Ah. Looks like we're just about to arrive. Let's see if this worked, hmm?"
A moment later, the central column stopped moving and the Doctor opened the door. "After you," he said politely, standing aside to let him past.
The Prosecutors Office was still dark, but the Doctor held up a device with a light on the end which lit up the hallways. They walked in silence, finally coming to a stop in front of room 1202.
"Here goes nothing," Phoenix said finally. He pushed open the door.
His shoulders sagged in relief as he looked around the room. Pink drapes. Chess set. Framed suit. There was no doubt about it; this room belonged to the Miles Edgeworth he remembered. He walked across the room and bent down to peer under the desk.
Underneath, Edgeworth was curled into a protective ball, but Phoenix could still spot the familiar pink suit and cravat. He was seized by an almost overwhelming urge to crawl under the desk next to him and hug him. In fact, he decided to do that as soon as the Doctor left.
He glanced at the strange man, who was examining the suit on the wall with curiosity. Finally he turned and grinned at Phoenix. "Yup, all back to normal. I'd better go and deal with those Zygons, hmm? It's going to be messy, you might want to stay away from Gourd lake for the next few days."
"Thank you," Phoenix said. He reached out and shook the Doctor's hand warmly.
The Doctor continued to grin manically. "You're welcome. Just do me a favour and never set foot on my TARDIS again, all right?"
"It's a deal," Phoenix promised.
He watched the man walk out of the room and then ducked behind the desk. It was cramped, but he managed to find a comfortable position that didn't involve too much inappropriate touching.
Finally, Edgeworth opened his eyes and looked blearily at him. "…Wright?"
Phoenix grinned happily. "Yeah. How are you feeling?"
Edgeworth frowned. "I feel super. What do you think?" He stretched, joints popping, and rolled out from under the desk.
Phoenix climbed to his feet as well, smiling wider. "I think we should go out and have something to eat, y'know, relax and calm ourselves down."
Edgeworth looked at him and wrinkled his nose disdainfully. "I have little desire to be seen in public with you, Wright, you look dreadful. When was the last time you washed that suit? And you can stop smirking at me like that, you look completely gormless."
Oh yes. This was reality. And it was good to be back.