Summary: It's in the middle of Kurusu's narration of the events of his life since coming to Tokyo that Sae realizes one important detail: Akechi Goro is Gay for Kurusu Akira. It Changes Things. ShuAke. Crack.

Note: Lilithium on AO3 talked a bit about Sae's Palace's Cognitive Akechi and why didn't we have him? in their comment on Listen- and damn do I agree with them.

Warnings: Ehehehehehe, Crack Fic Is Life, Crack Fic Is Love, Akechi's Murderous Urges, Is This Everyone Wants to Kill Akira 2.0? Who Knows, Random Cognitive Guards Have No Right To Have This Much Personality.

Disclaimer: Don't own P5.

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When Goro reached the interrogation room, he knew something wasn't right.

The first indication was the guard who was looking at him in shock that quickly turned to fury. The second was when the guard opened his mouth and demanded, "Who are you, imposter?!"

"Imposter?" Goro raised an eyebrow and smiled pleasantly, "Why would you ask me such a question?"

The guard scoffed, "Why wouldn't I? Akechi Goro just entered the room to do his own interrogation."

"I assure you." Goro's smile turned just this side of sharp to give the guard pause, "I haven't entered the room, which means the one who has, is probably the actual imposter."

Through the power of sheer hidden murderous intent, the guard conceded to Goro and gestured to the room, "Fine. Have at it."

"Oh, but I can't possibly get into the interrogation room alone with a dangerous criminal like the leader of the Phantom Thieves, and an imposter using my own identity, both waiting on the other side of this door. Could you accompany me?"

The guard grumbled, "Fine." The guard opened the door and stepped in, Goro flowing behind him.

The guard paused and Goro paused as well, peering into the room and receiving the shock of his life.

The Akechi Goro imposter did his job too well; it looked like Goro was looking into a clone of his.

But besides that.

His clone separated hastily from Kurusu, blushing furiously and hurrying to button up his opened shirt and attempt to hide the hickies littering his chest and neck.

It was too late; Goro had seen them.

Kurusu blinked at Goro and the guard innocently, face bruised from the beating the interrogators probably gave him in order to make him spill. Goro wasn't deceived in the slightest.

"What," The guard started, "Is going on here?"

Goro would like the answer to that question himself.

(His hand itched for a gun- there was a horrible fake wearing his face and Goro wasn't going to rest until the fake dropped dead.)

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End

Basically, shuake is a ship that sailed in Sae's Palace. Hope you enjoyed this tiny bit of cognitive!Akira/cognitive!Akechi ^^

(The first one to get a bullet to the head this time around is cognitive!Akechi, yep I'm not sorry.)