A/N: You know I don't own it...Ms. Meyer does..(damn)

Playlist:

Soul Meets Body - Death Cab for Cutie

Calendar Girl - Stars

Saturday's - The Stuff of Fairy Tales

Saturday morning; same as any other day. It constitutes the same boring events as any other. My Saturday? I wake up, run in my favourite park near my house, get on my computer, write a chapter of my book, clean the house, walk the dog, re-write the previous chapter I wrote, watch a romance, and go to bed.

Every. Single. Saturday.

Saturday, Febuary 28th 2009.

My alarm clock was going off, effectively ending the freakish dream I was having that included a monkey gnawing holes through male models and using them as windows in my house…

Yeah. Did I mention the penguins with coquet mallets?

..Anyways

I got myself out of bed, throwing myself to the floor to see if the monkeys were under my bed first (they weren't- but I knew they were somewhere), and then putting on my usual running outfit. I threw my hair up, grabbed my Ipod, and was out the door.

I liked running. Really, I never did this to just become skinny. Yeah, that was a really, really, great side effect, but I ran because I could think. I could plan out my next chapter. I could dream of my heroine's prince. Dude, I could fly when I was running.

Okay, well at least in my imagination; but whatever.

Due to these enticing thoughts and dreams, I managed to not see the closely looming pothole that marred the running path.

Really, what the hell?

I also didn't see the huge, slimy toad which happened to hop out of the bush and onto the path as well.

Just ahead of that aforementioned pothole.

So I tripped over that pothole just as I was planning on giving Edward, the hero in my latest novel, the ability to fly.

Seriously, do higher powers think their funny? I don't.

Call it fate but I fell, and I fell hard. I was bruised for months after that on my elbows and my knees. But that wasn't the worst part, no, no it gets better.

That disgusting, bumpy, slimy toad just had to be in the perfect place so that when I fell, rather ungracefully, I managed to land my face right on it.

Actually, specifically my lips.

"Powers that be?" – I'm not laughing.

With my exhalation of breath in a loud and resounding "UFF!" not only did I manage to

land on top of the toad, I managed to kiss the thing too.

Who does that!?

Anyways, so I picked myself up slowly. Every inch of my body felt as if a rhino had used me for a slip n' slide and I hurt!

First thing I was going to do when I got home was call the municipality.

I check out my surroundings – you know ..Scope out people that might have seen my fall from grace and took a picture of it to put on the 8:00 news or something. I wouldn't put it past them, Forks had little to no entertainment.

Thankfully no one was around.

My Ipod had dropped and I now had a new scratch running right down the middle of it. My baby! I was taking it to repair tonight for sure, poor thing. That's when I saw that retarded toad.

Seriously, it was in the same spot.

And it was convulsing.

Oh my God! I got down on my hands and feet, I suddenly felt really very bad for the little guy. I started to poke it hoping it would miraculously get up and hop away.

Yeah, that didn't happen, but things would be a lot saner if it did.

"Toad? Mr. Toad…aww crap" I officially felt bad, now I'd have to bury it. I went to pick it up, intent on giving it a froggy burial when something happened that, let me tell you, is stuff of the imagination.

This story will NOT be a long one! I never write long stories - I loose intrest way to fast. Plus I would feel horrible for not updating regularly! so although I have millions of story ideas bouncing around my head, almost none of them will end up on paper. :S

Thats what sad stuff is made of.

This I will finish though! Promise! It will be no longer then 4 chapters though; a "four-shot" :D

Reviews make the world go 'round! ;D

DJ~