A series of oneshots about House and Rachel over the years.
House walked up to Cuddy's office door and peered in the window. She had her back turned to the door, talking on the phone, probably with some irate donor, he thought. He was just about to leave when he saw a stroller sitting up against the door. Silently, he opened Cuddy's office door without a single creak and, with one hand, rolled the stroller and its sleeping baggage out.
House! Nurse Brenda yelled from the nurse's station when she saw him unsteadily guiding the stroller out the hospital's front doors. But it was too late- he was out the door. Nurse Brenda sighed, resolving to tell Cuddy her two children had officially escaped.
House sat with a thump on the picnic bench. It had taken him longer to get over here than he originally planned, having to guide the stroller awkwardly while simultaneously leaning on the cane. Rachel still hadn't woken up; despite the jumbling she had assuredly gotten on the sidewalks coming over to the lakeside park.
House first looked to see if anyone was watching them, then pulled the stroller to face him. Rachel looked very peaceful. Good, he thought. If she'd been crying he wouldn't have known what to do. Looking very pleased with himself at his little escapade, House smiled and popped a Vicodin and lay back on the table. It wasn't five minutes before he'd dozed off, dreaming of how freaked Cuddy would be when she realized she had misplaced her child.
He awoke suddenly when a nearby breeze blew a leaf onto his face. Startled, he rose up from his reclined position only to find something missing. He rubbed his face sleepily and took a moment to think. There was definitely something missing. What was it? He then remembered with a sinking feeling in the bottom of his stomach. The baby. What was it's name? Cuddy's kid. He had kidnapped it and now it had been kidnapped for real.
He stood up with a bolt and the realization of what had happened as he surveyed his surroundings hit him like a punch in the stomach. Cuddy was going to be hysterical. He had to find that baby.
He sat down to think. Police? Not yet. He had to form a solo search party. What color was the stroller? Was the kid big enough to walk? He didn't think so. And the stroller was pink. Of course. As he had his head in his hands House spotted a pink form in middle of the parking lot. It was too far away to tell, but it looked like a stroller. And there was a figure reaching into the trunk. True kidnappers, House thought, as he immediately flung his cane to the side and ran- albeit slowly- toward the illusive stroller.
By the time he reached the dark blue mini van the doors were closed and they had put the car in reverse. Stop! He yelled, but to no avail. With a thud, he threw himself onto the hood of the car. The driver, a middle-aged woman, shrieked.
"What the hell?" the woman yelled as she put the car in park and got out.
"Hand over that kid…" House managed to croak out from his awkward position on the hood of the car.
"I most certainly will not," the lady said. "And you would do well to get OFF my car."
"That kid in there is not yours, and I'm not moving until I get it back."
"That child was stolen by a homeless man and I found her in the park, I'm giving her to police," the woman said uneasily. House thought he saw the first signs of recognition on her face as he slowly got off the hood of the van.
"You're… the…"
"I am NOT a homeless person. I am an esteemed doctor out having a perfectly good time with my child, when some ARROGANT ASSHOLE gets the nerve to steal her..."
"I thought…I thought…" the woman stammered.
"What you thought is irrelevant. What sort of idiot steals a child?" House replied. He would have argued more, but his thigh gave him about two minutes before he would collapse in a heap on the ground.
"Just give her back, and try to remember this event when you next think about taking someone's child. I should have you reported," House said disgustedly, leaning on the hood of the car.
The woman tearily opened the side door and retrieved a slumbering baby, Rachel, House finally remembered her name. Wobbly, House limped over to grab Rachel out of the outstretched arms of the woman. As he walked away, his unsteady gait woke the baby, and she let out a soft cry.
"Sir?" the woman asked.
"What?" House whirled around and stared at the lady he'd hoped would be gone by now.
"It's just…I'm sorry. But. Do you need some help? If you've been drinking you really shouldn't be holding that baby. You might drop her."
House was beginning to wish he had never attempted this godforsaken adventure. What he should have done was give this lady a verbal bashing she never would have forgotten. What he did was somewhat less dramatic.
He rolled his eyes. "Just give me back the goddamn stroller."
The woman did as she was told and retrieved the pink stroller from the trunk of the car. House sat Rachel down with a thump in the stroller. As soon as the lady had pulled away, he struggled to bend down and buckle the strap over her belly. She giggled softly as his hand softly stroked her stomach.
Leaning heavily on the stroller, House made his way back to the park bench. He was so focused on staying upright he didn't notice a certain hospital administrator glaring at him from the edge of the park.
Cuddy stared at the odd pair. When Nurse Brenda had told her where House and Rachel were headed off to, she hadn't been that worried. Maybe a little. OK, she was really worried about Rachel. But Rachel seemed fine, Cuddy noticed, as they both grew nearer. It was House that looked worse for wear.
"House!" She yelled.
The look he gave her made her swallow all the insults he deserved and rush closer. His face was drawn and pale and as he neared the seat, he pushed the stroller at Cuddy.
"You know," Cuddy said, oblivious to what had happened, "the next time you want to take her for a walk you should ask and we can go together so you can use your cane." She wanted to sound gentle, but it came out condescending, and she immediately regretted saying anything.
"Just take your spawn," House muttered.
As Cuddy left, stroller in hand, House ran his hand over his thigh and stared off into the distance, looking at the lake. True, it hadn't turned out as planned, but, he absentmindedly looked at his fingers, Rachel had giggled when he touched her stomach. It was one of the first times since Stacy he had touched someone he hadn't paid ahead of time. He smiled to himself and kept staring into the distance.