"Have you been down to see Chef yet?" I asked.
"First thing this morning, you?"
"He talked about you," I said, thinking how I probably shouldn't have said that and instantly regretting saying it.
"Me?" he asked, with curiosity. He was probably wondering
where I was going with this.
"Us," I should stop this conversation now. There is no point in opening old wounds. It wouldn't be fair for either of us.
"What about us?" asked Trip.
"It's not important," I said, getting off the subject. I shouldn't talk about this. It's been over between us for six years. Six years. To bring this up now isn't right.
"Why'd you bring it up, then?" He sounded somewhat amused.
Despite everything inside of me, yelling drop it, I asked "Do you ever miss me?"
The look upon his face was a look of such confusion and shock, "You mean…"
"Yes."
"Do you know how long it's been?" he asked. He voice was filled with emotions. Shock, tenderness, confusion, anguish, and if I'm not mistaken a hint of anger.
"That's not what I asked," I said. I shouldn't push him. He shouldn't have to tell me anything. What right do I have drudging up old memories… old feelings.
Long years have passed since the death of our child. We agreed to stop whatever it was between us. Being around each other made it all the more painful, all the more real. I don't think either of us could've handled that.
"Well, yeah, I guess, sometimes," he replied. I was somewhat shocked by his statement. I don't know why.
"I haven't thought about those days in a long time," I informed him, wondering if that was the wrong thing to say at the moment. I most likely was, but I saw no reason to lie now.
"Benefit of being a Vulcan," said Trip. The human had a look of agony upon his face. I immediately wished to take my words back. I did not covet causing him any more pain.
"After speaking with Chef, I realized we may never see each other again," Before I could finish Trip interrupted me.
"What are you talking about?"
"We're talking different assignments," I said. "There's no way of knowing."
"There's every way of knowing," said Trip, his voice so certain. "I can guarantee you we're not going to lose touch. Stop thinking like that."
"However long it may be, I believe I'm going to miss you," I said to him. The look on his face was a look I will never forget.