Who was my Mother?
It was finally over.
The last of the Dark Side had been demolished, or captured. The Death Star never reached its completion. Darth Sidious was dead. Right now, in a camp of furry little bear-like creatures, a group of people was celebrating their victory: Han Solo, Leia Skywalker, Chewbacca, Threepio, R2-D2, and the pilot.
But Luke Skywalker was not present.
No, Luke Skywalker, the Jedi, the last of Jedi until more were trained, was sitting quietly outside the camp, looking at the dark sky and the moon overhead. His eyes were unfocused and melancholy. Of course, he was extremely thankful that the war was resolved. Many had given their lives for the Light, and he would always respect them.
The reason he was so unhappy now was that he felt a great void in his heart and mind. There was still one more thing he had to do before he could achieve full recovery from this ordeal. He had often dreamed of this ever since he was little boy.
He had to really talk to is father, and ask about his mother.
But how could he call him through the Force?
Luke closed his eyes and summoned the Force within him, letting it fill his very soul.
Father…father…come out…I would like to talk to you…
He felt a tug in his heart and a piece of the Force moving towards him. He opened his eyes.
His father, Anakin Skywalker, was standing in all his Forceful glory. He was not burned, like Darth Vader. He was actually quite the handsome fellow. Brown hair framed his soft features. He was just a few feet taller than his son was.
"Son…" he said, smiling, "You called me?"
Luke smiled back and nodded. "I just wanted to talk to you for a while."
"I have all the time in the world for that," said his father, sitting down beside him.
Luke smiled wider, but inside he felt extremely nervous. How was he to bring up his mother? What had happened to her anyhow?
"Um…" he said. Anakin waited patiently. Could he feel Luke's discomfort?
"How did you become a Jedi?"
Anakin smiled again.
"I was nine years old. I was a slave to a creature who you may never see again. I did live in Tatooine with my-mother, Shmi Skywalker."
Even in death, Luke could feel a pain of loss within his father's soul.
"And after a while, two men came to my house. One of them you have known for a long time. Obi-Wan Kenobi."
"Ben?" said Luke.
"Obi-Wan was a Padawan to the second man that came with him. You could always tell who was the more experienced by their hairstyles. A Padawan in those times wore a short ponytail and a long braid reached their shoulders. A master would grow his hair to his shoulders, and attain a beard. The Master of Obi-Wan was Qui-Gon Jinn, and it was he who told me I was to become a Jedi. He said-"
Anakin broke off. It was clear that the memories were flooding into his brain, stifling his speech.
"He said what?" said Luke.
"I was the Chosen One, at that time. I was supposed to bring the Force back into balance. Look at me now, hmm?" he added, spreading his arms.
Luke nodded slowly.
"So then, I packed my things, and left three people behind. The first was my own handmade robot, Threepio."
"Threepio was your creation?" said Luke, shocked. "But he's so new looking!"
Anakin laughed. "I didn't finish him myself! Your grandmother-my mother-probably added the outer parts, and then I painted him gold when we met again."
"Wow."
"I know. Well, then, the second person I left-happily-was my dirty old owner. I have forgotten his name. He wasn't such a wonderful owner."
"And who was the third person?" said Luke. He suddenly wished he could take it back. He knew perfectly who the third person was.
"My mother." Said Anakin quietly. "She couldn't be freed. That was the only way I could leave with Qui-Gon. I was free. However, I had to leave my mother. She told me not to worry. That I would see her again. So I left, and never looked back."
Anakin paused again, and though Luke felt sorry for him, he knew that he had to know everything.
"I was taken to the Jedi Council, where I met Master Yoda, Master Windu, and many other great Masters who you may never meet. They at first said that I was too old. Usually Jedi were trained at a very young age. Then Qui-Gon added that I was the Chosen One, and soon enough, they agreed.
So, the plans were set. I was supposed to be trained alongside Obi-Wan. Qui-Gon was supposed to be my mentor."
"But…" said Luke, knowing there was a catch.
"But…Qui-Gon was killed by Darth Maul, a Master of the Dark Side. I was not there to witness it. From what I can infer, Obi-Wan was. Overcome by anger, he killed Maul. Before Qui-Gon died, he made obi-Wan promise that he would train me. Since Obi-Wan felt like a son to him, he fulfilled his promise.
"I think he did a very good job." Anakin added, smiling.
Luke nodded in amazement at his father's history. Nevertheless, it was time to find out why he turned to the dark Side.
"So…why did you turn to the Dark Side?"
Anakin's smile faded at once. A shadow crossed his face, taunting every line.
"I was Obi-Wan's apprentice for so long, even when my hair grew. I knew I was strong with the Force. My powers far outstripped many at the council. But it made me too sure of myself. I felt that as I had saved Obi-Wan's skin for the ninth time that I was entitled to the Master's position in the Council. I was put on the council, but denied the position as Master. I was so angry. I took it out on everyone. What made me even angrier was the mission assigned to me. I was to spy on the Chancellor Palpatine."
Luke frowned. "Who?"
"Darth Sidious."
Luke dropped his mouth.
"I had no idea at that time. He always praised my powers and voiced all my feelings. Like a father, he was. Until he started talking of a Dark Lord that became evil to save the ones he loved. They were saved. The power to save them could not be learned from a Jedi. That was my falling point. I saved Sidious from death by killing Windu, who was about to kill him. I helped destroy the Jedi Knights and bring down the Council. I fought my own Master, Obi-Wan, who won by cutting off my legs and arm until I only had my artificial arm to lift me up."
Anakin lifted his right and, which was a robot's arm. Luke remembered cutting off that same hand in his showdown against Vader.
"I caught fire where I was lying and burned to the point where I had to wear my mask to keep me alive. That was the mask of Darth Vader."
Anakin looked very unhappy after saying all of this.
Luke could not wait anymore.
"But father…you said that the story was about a Dark Lord who did it for the one he loved. So that means you had someone you loved…didn't you?"
Anakin bowed his head and took a deep breath.
"Father…" said Luke. "Who was my mother?"
Anakin kept his head down for a long time. Finally, he stood and walked over to the nearest tree, his back to Luke.
"Her name was Padme Amidala, my son.
"Padme Naberrie Amidala was the Queen of Naboo when I first met her at nine years old. She was only fourteen, and very beautiful. I asked her if she was an angel when we exchanged names. She was always very kind to me, and always ready to listen. She was a strong leader.
Moreover, she was my friend.
"I gave her a Japor snippet to remember me by before I had to leave for my training. I let her know that I cared for her very much, and she returned those feelings, though not in the same way as I. I was too young for her at that time."
Luke laughed a little.
"Ten years later. I am a Padawan, and Obi-Wan Kenobi, my master, is accompanying me to the Council, where we will meet Senator Amidala. Senator Amidala has had many death attempts to her life, and must go into hiding. I am assigned to bring her back to her home of Naboo, where she will hide until the assassin is found. She barely recognized me. She looked at me with a renewed light in her eyes. That light stuck with her forever.
We went to Naboo together, disguised as refugees. We shared our first kiss at the arbor where she grew up."
Anakin stopped, smiling painfully, biting his lips, as thought trying to taste her lips through his.
"But we were doomed. She was a senator, and I, a Jedi. Such love was forbidden, as we knew it. We did try to keep things platonic. Which we did, until…until I went to visit my mother. I had nightmares of her all the time, and I knew she was suffering. I had to help her.
So, we went to Tatooine, where I last left her. I found out she was sold to another man, who was her husband. I found out from him that the Sand People took her three months earlier. I had to find her. I rode on my speeder for days until I reached the camp of the Sand People. She was there. But she died in my arms."
Luke felt terribly sick. To have the person you love slip away in your hands was a painful experience he had dealt with just today.
"I brought her body back to her family. We held a funeral right when R2 gave news that Obi-wan was capture by the Separatists. Padme and I reached Geonosis, where we found his captives, who took us easily and sentenced us to death.
It was then, finally, when Padme confessed her love to me."
Anakin's eyes were watering. Luke's were not. YET.
"But we were saved from our fate, all three of us, by a group of Jedi warriors, and Master Yoda. On ships were we chased by Count Dookhu the enemy leader, whom I had to battle alone, as Obi-Wan was grievously injured. Yet, Dookhu cut off my arm.
I do not know how Yoda was able to hold him off until the others came, but that Master can fight as well as anyone, no matter how short he may be. Dookhu escaped barely. Moreover, I was taken to the infirmary, where my arm was fixed.
The details are not needed, my son. But you should know that I secretly married Padme back in Naboo.
I loved this woman so much. I always will. Yet, such love can be too much when you would do the unforgivable things for that one special person. I had dreams of her dying in childbirth. She was pregnant, she told me. With twins. After the incident with my mother, I could not lose another person I loved.
That, my son, is why I came to the dark side. Because I loved her so much that I would do anything for her life."
"But then…" said Luke, trying to grasp all of this. "How did she die?"
Anakin had tears running down his cheeks.
"Me."
Luke's heart shot into his throat.
"She tried to save me, Luke. She came to me when I was returning to my master, and tried to convince me back towards the Light. I did not listen. She told me I was breaking her heart. I flew into a rage, thinking she was plotting against me. Obi Wan stood in the entrance of her ship. I thought she had betrayed me. And so…and so…I…"
This was getting too hard to Anakin, but he went on.
"I…used the Force to…choke her. I was not aware of tightening my grip. I was not aware of anything. She passed out as I let go. I fought Obi-Wan over her body.
Later on, as I assumed my title of Vader, I asked if she was all right, because I knew that she was still alive when I choked her. Palatine-Sidious-told me I had killed her. Even though I knew She was alive when I chocked her, I knew she was dead because of me. I knew she had died in childbirth, not because of a complication in health, but because she had lost the will to live. That was my fault. I took away her reason for living. I was not Annie anymore.
"And I will have to live with that for the rest of my life, Luke. The fact that I caused the death of the one that I loved, even when I did all that did to save her life, will always be a tear in my heart."
Luke finally was beginning to cry. His father had done so many unthinkable things, and he was saying it right now. His love for his father could never lessen (in fact, his admiration of him grew) but now there would always be a fear of his powers. A fear of getting what his mother did, by Anakin's hand.
"So…" said Luke. "You will never see her again. I will never see her again. That is it. She's gone!"
"Oh, no!" said Anakin, shocked. "She's still with me. I spend my afterlife with that woman. She is one with the Force, as I am."
"But you said-"
"I will always live with my guilt, Luke," Anakin interrupted. "Do you hear me? Always. Padme, however, has forgiven me. She told me that her last words were, I know there is still good in him…There is no way I will lose the good in me again."
"I can see her."
"Of course you can, son, " said Anakin, smiling. "You just have to call her. Like you called me."
"But, but, but dad," stammered Luke, "She wasn't a Jedi. I mean, only a Jedi can become one with the Force, right?"
Anakin's smile widened. "The Force can make exceptions," he said slyly.
Luke swallowed. 'I hope you are right," he said.
He closed his eyes and thought,
Mother…mother Padme…mother…I would like to meet you…it is your son, Luke…
A great tug on his heart announced her arrival. He opened his eyes.
She was beautiful.
Her brown hair curled over her shoulders, her perfect shaped lips were curved into a smile, and her brown eyes-so very much like Leia's-were like brown diamonds glistening underwater. She was tearing at the sight of him.
"Mom…" was all that Luke could say.
She smiled and turned to her husband. "He looks like his father."
Anakin replied, "You haven't met his sister. She is the spitting image of her mother."
"Leia-she's-" said Luke, the words tumbling out of his mouth. "She's at the camp. If you want I can-"
"If we want?" asked Padme. "We need to, very, very much. But first, let me have a look at you." She bent down on her knees and stared into her son's eyes.
After a minute, she said, "The last time we met…you were just arriving into this world. Now look at you. A Jedi…like your father before you."
She smiled even more. "The Force is strong in your family, Luke. Never forget that."
Luke nodded. "Mother…you are so…beautiful."
Padme smiled at Anakin. "Only because I am so in love, " she said.
"No," said Luke, "It's because you have a husband who is so in love with you."
Padme shared another smile with her husband.
"Now…now can I bring Leia to you?" said Luke. He was impatient for the entire Skywalker family to unite under the stars.
Padme nodded.
"I will be back," said Luke excitedly, getting up to go fetch his sister.
"I love you so much," said Anakin to his wife, nuzzling her neck.
"I love you more, Annie," said Padme, wrapping her arms around him.
In less than twenty seconds, they could hear voices-
"Are you serious"
"Yes! I am very serious! You can finally meet your parents, Leia."
"And my mother?"
"Yes, your mother! Leia, did you not just hear me say, 'parents' rather than, 'parent?'"
"If you're pulling my leg, Luke Skywalker, I swear I will-"
"Thank me for bringing you along, now hurry up!"
Finally, Anakin and Padme's offspring came into view.
Padme stared at her daughter. She could have been staring into a mirror if she had not known better. Leia was undeniably beautiful. She also had the look of a strong leader. To see her two children standing next to each other was very emotional for both parents. Anakin was just amazed at the daughter's resemblance to his wife.
Leia stared at the two ghosts of the Force.
"Mother?" she whispered.
Padme nodded, too moved to speak.
"Father?" Leia whispered, tearing up.
Anakin nodded, grinning.
Leia approached her mother with great caution. She fell to her knees in fascination, just staring at the beautiful woman she remembered vaguely in her dreams…
"You're very beautiful," said Leia.
"It shows through you, my darling," the mother replied, raising a hand to Leia's face, and stroking it softly. Leia could faintly feel her hand on her cheek. She smiled.
Anakin looked up at the stars. "It's getting late," he said to Luke. "The others will want to know where you've gone."
"I don't want to tell them about this right now," said Luke defiantly. "Or ever. This is something between the Skywalkers. Nobody else needs to know."
"I agree," said Leia, standing up next to her mother. "Is that alright?"
"You have my vote," said Padme, looking at Anakin, who just nodded happily.
In silence, the stood; Leia and Luke arm-in-arm, and their loving mother and father in a tight embrace. This was a moment to last a lifetime. And there would be many more moments like this to come.
"Goodbye, mother," said Leia. "Goodbye, father."
"We'll see you again," said Luke. "We love you."
"We love you more, children," said Padme.
"Take care," said Anakin.
However, just as the two were about to leave, Leia shouted, "Wait!"
"What?" asked Padme in alarm.
"Um…" Leia mumbled. "Sorry…I just wanted to know…for a long time…something stupid, um…"
"Nothing you have to say is stupid, Leia," Padme reassured.
"Okay," said Leia. "I have always wanted to know...if someone would ask you about how strong your relationship is with father, what would you say?"
For a long time, Padme just stared at Leia. Luke got the feeling she was glad someone had asked her. Padme turned to look at Anakin, who stared back.
Leia, who was not familiar with the Force yet, felt waves of love radiating from her parents.
"Our love…" said Padme finally, "goes across the stars."
"In life," said Anakin, the mist surrounding the two as they faded away, "And in death…"
Their words echoed around the chambers of Luke and Leia's minds.
"Look!" said Luke, pointing to the sky.
Two stars were shining brightly over their heads, moving with every step they took away form the area, and morphing slowly into eyes. One eye was blue, and the twins knew it was their father. The other eyes stayed the star color, but it was obvious these star-eyes were gifts from their parents.
"Love lasts as long as some will allow," said Luke after a long time. "Some loves will move on for many years, while others crash to the ground."
"But this love…" finished Leia, hugging Luke. "The love of the Skywalkers…takes us across the stars…"
"In life and in death," said the two together.
Remember those words, you should, young Padawans.
For if without a love, you are,
Lost in the dark side, you will be.
The End