What happened?
That was the only thought running through Sam's mind, continually pounding in her head until she was nearly driven insane.
Carly was gone. Just like that, she had packed up her bags and hopped on a plane to Italy.
Quite honestly, Sam thought it was stupid to make a decision like that so suddenly. However, she knew if she had protested, Carly would be hurt and nothing short than overwhelmed. As her best friend, Sam didn't want that. Yet, it ripped her heart apart to know she had just let her go.
Carly wasn't the only person on Sam's mind. She thought about Spencer, too, and his ridiculous decision to give Sam of all people the motorcycle. Sure, she was one of Carly's closest friends, but Sam hadn't deserved such a kind gift, regardless of what he had told her. Like Freddie had told her, she wasn't a good person in any means.
Oh, she found herself thinking about Freddie, too, but that was nothing new. He occupied her thoughts relentlessly.
Now, though, she had suspicion he was part of the reason for her throbbing headache. He was senseless and confusing. Nothing he ever did anymore made sense.
Sam felt her stomach tighten as she recalled their earlier conversation that day, and what Carly had confessed to her. It was too much to handle, and it had completely thrown her off her feet, and she couldn't pull herself back up. She knew she shouldn't be losing her mind over a nerdy guy who wears a purse for his absurdly sized phone, and had this happened to anyone else, she would have laughed.
Being the one in the situation, she didn't find it humorous.
Not to mention Freddie had changed, for what reason, she didn't know. He was no longer the kind and trustworthy boy she fell in love with. No, now she felt as if he was using her. She felt as if he was toying with her feelings. She felt as if he never loved her like he said he had.
She felt as if she was second best, standing behind Carly.
It had always been Carly, and she was unwise to think that had changed. He hadn't shown a hint of interest in her until she had kissed him in the courtyard.
How silly it was not to notice how his feelings for her appeared out of nowhere. Instead, she let herself open up to him. She trusted him, and would have never thought he could do the things he had.
She would never trust anyone again. He had taught her that. If she couldn't trust someone like Freddie, she was hopeless.
They had dated for a small while, but it didn't work out. The relationship felt forced and at times, beyond awkward.
Wasn't it ironic how he didn't say "I love you" until he decided to break up with her? She was too naïve, but that doesn't matter anymore. She won't let anyone close enough to find that out.
The same night they exchanged the words "I love you", the same night they broke up, she gave herself to him.
He took her virginity and then they called it quits. They were done, and couldn't properly look each other in the eyes after that.
She truly was stupid, wasn't she? Everyone made her out to be tough, but obviously she was weak and vulnerable. He didn't want anything to do with her, he only wanted her body.
She knew this for a fact. It was evident.
It only took a few weeks or months for Freddie to go back to chasing after her best friend. Sam had been tossed aside. She was no longer wanted.
Though Freddie was lovesick for her, Sam thought for sure Carly didn't return the feelings.
She was wrong. She was very, very wrong.
Sam had once or twice heard the saying "When it rains, it pours." She had thought it to be pathetic.
It's weird how you don't understand some things until they happen to you, isn't it?
Of course the day that Carly moved part way across the globe was the day Freddie had to kiss her.
Carly had told Sam about her and Freddie's moment after she was miles up in the sky in an airplane. It was as if she couldn't have told her in person, because she knew it would hurt her feelings, which, by the way, was a total underestimate of how she felt. She didn't know why Carly had kissed him, that she wasn't explained.
Sam had really thought that maybe, just maybe, Freddie actually wanted to get back together with her when he uttered that sentence over the phone. That spark of hope in her heart was completely crushed and demolished. It could never be repaired. She was broken. He broke her.
But that was okay, because she was Sam and she never knew anything but heartbreak.