The pain was intense, deep and seemingly eternal. She had never thought, in her wildest dreams, that this pain could be this real, this intense and NOT kill her. The thought of living the next few years, decades….with this pain in her soul every moment, every day was heavy, obstructing her vision, clouding her mind and tearing her soul into pieces.

BETRAYED…LIAR….

ON her knees, bent over, the agony creating in her a hole in which everything good, and sweet, and life-giving disappeared. She felt his mind reaching for her, touching her shields, begging entrance, but she tightened against him, thickened her shields against him, against everything…all the pain, all the emotions, all the feelings… The City queried her, begging for her status, but she couldn't reply, so lost was she in her pain. Death would be welcomed, a release. She rose, ordered her companion to stay, to care for the others and exited the room, walking to the lift. The City, the mental "voice" insistent, queried her for her status again, but she ignored it. ON the first level of the tower, she strode through the door, into the bright sunshine of the new planet. The sun, bigger and more yellow than from her home, the seas beyond the city more green than blue, but with a strange sparkle unfamiliar to her human eyes…

Not human….alien, beloved, BETRAYER…. The pain, not even dulled before, came back more intense, deeper… She thought the pain would smother her, stop her breathing, stop her heart.

Heart…love….his beloved, her beloved….his LIES…. She wanted to scream, to vent, to cry…but her eyes refused to cry. Like her alien lover, who had no tear ducts, who couldn't find the release of tears, her own tears felt dammed up, frozen in the infinite pain.

Blinded by the pain, she was surprised to find herself at the end of the furthest pier. Looking over the alien sea, on an alien planet that had never been her intent, she felt the burn of tears, but before they could fall, they froze in the pain. She had left everything she loved, for the one she thought was the love of her life, her soul mate, her beloved. She had ignored the possibility that he was manipulating her, believing her heart when it told her that he loved her, that she was his beloved….and now, here in this alien place, she knew the pain of betrayal.

:I did not lie to you, beloved….please…let me speak to you…..:

She cut his mind off from hers, building the walls thicker, heavier, deeper. Like the walls of his ship, his home that she would never see….

:Commander..please…..you need to respond: The City, its sentience even more pronounced back here, in her own place, on the planet she was created on, was insistent, stronger, in her head and on the PA system. The urgency in the "voice" of the City was clear and present, as was the urgency of the voice of her beloved…her betrayer….

PAIN….AGONY…. LET IT END…..PLEASE LET IT END…..I DON'T WANT TO LIVE THIS WAY…..

:NO!:

:NO: "NO!"

The voices were loud, but drowned out by her pain….moving slowly, she sat on the edge of the railing, forcing her body, her first betrayer onto the rail, turning, despite the pain the movement caused her physically. She was used to physical pain, had lived with it for years, learned to work around it, her mind, her gifts, never betrayed her, but her body had betrayed her for years. Fragile, ill, hurting, physically damaged and destroying itself. Someone had told her once, that a person could only have one full on strength….mental, intelligence, physical…no one was strong in all three; two out of three was the best you could hope for. Some had intelligence and physical strength, others had physical and mental, but the mind of a child. And others, like she herself, had the mental talents and intelligence, but a body that made pain a living, breathing part of her life.

PAIN…so much heart pain…..the agony of betrayal….

"I did not betray you, Beloved…" Turning sharply, she nearly fell, only his strong, alien hands stopping her from plunging down 130 feet to the thrumming alien ocean below. It did not escape his notice, nor the city's, that she made no attempt to stop the fatal plunge, nor to grab either railing or the alien who stood now grasping her upper arms.

"LET ME GO!", her voice was un-naturally high pitched, the pain clearly heard, the tears that wouldn't fall evident in her voice. The Alien growled, his unique amber eyes with their vertical pupil narrowed, but his hands never let go as he said,

"I will not…Bel…"
:NO! NO MORE LIES…LET ME GO: Her mind voice filled with so much pain that it felt as though her pain struck him, opened his skin, his heart and bled him. But he didn't let go, he continued,

"Beloved….I DID NOT LIE TO YOU…..please….come back over the rail."

"LEAVE me alone…..". a snarl met her cry and the alien voice, with its multiple harmonic levels said, harshly,

"I WILL NOT!", she went limp, the tears that had refused to fall, now fell fast and furious, and the alien held her by her arms, moving closer to the her, and catching her against his chest, pausing a moment to hold her, eyes closed, keeping her close, Then he reached down, slid his other arm beneath her legs and picked her up, swinging her over the railing and cradling her against him. Her tears soaked the leather of his coat, and her body was racked with her sobs, but he felt her body shiver, and jerk as well. Snarling, he spoke out loud, "Atlantis…let the doctor out…the male one….and send him to the infirmary. I'll meet him there with her…."