I do not own Before We Go.
I do not own Chris Evans or his beautiful beard.
Jump
She was too beautiful, too smart, too clever, too everything to be anything than everything to somebody.
And she was selling herself short for some guy who had cheated and, no doubt, would cheat again.
No matter his reasons, it was unforgivable.
But she, for whatever reason, felt she owed it to him and herself to go back and try to work it out.
And he didn't want her to go back and try and work it out with somebody who so clearly didn't deserve her.
But it wasn't up to him.
She had to make her own decision.
He wasn't even sure how much he felt for her.
Except he did.
And it had been a night like no other.
Because of her.
And him.
Together.
Not all good. Not all bad.
Almost an entire sketch of a possible lifetime crammed into one exhaustive, wandering night.
And now, she was leaving.
To go back to him.
Whoever he was.
And Nick didn't want her to.
He wanted to wrap her up against him.
Gaze into those beautiful eyes.
And follow that first and second kiss with a third one.
But it wasn't the time.
It was time for her to go.
And for him to let her.
So he did.
And watched her look back.
Only once.
And refuse to allow herself to again.
Life went on.
He went on.
It wasn't that bad.
He did normal things.
Paid his bills.
Bought groceries.
Cleaned his apartment.
Hung out with friends.
Called his mom.
Slept.
Thought about her.
Played his trumpet of course.
And went for walks.
Long, long walks.
He wasn't looking for her, not exactly.
She had gotten on the train, gone home.
But finally, he wasn't looking for her anymore either.
That was good. That was better.
And of course, he went to the Duke audition.
That was first.
After some strong coffee and a sandwich or two.
It had been a very long night after all.
"So how's Duke?"
He knew her voice immediately.
Just like he knew she had known he would.
That clear voice, refusing that shaky tinge it got when she was uncertain of impending outcomes.
The world and all the sights and sounds in it faded out, became unimportant.
He grinned easy into the cellphone.
"Good, he's good."
A pause.
"But you knew that already, didn't you?"
Her chuckle was light and airy, belying the nerves behind it.
"Of course I did. I knew it when you played 'My Funny Valentine'."
He shook his head, still grinning.
"No, you didn't, don't lie."
She acquiesced.
"Okay, I didn't then. But I knew later."
He raised his thick eyebrows in instant curiosity.
"Oh really? When later?"
Her silence cast about for about a second before admitting the truth.
"Since I left you in the train station."
He was vaguely aware his chest growing warm.
"Wow, that was . . ."
". . . months ago, yeah," she interrupted.
Then there was another silence between them.
Not awkward so much. Just . . . a breath.
Like fate taking its precious time.
"So . . ." he plunged on, as casually as possible. "What happened?"
He could almost see her on the other end of the phone, eyes flicking here and there, choosing, selecting, finding her response.
"I . . . I . . . I couldn't accept anymore. I . . . I decided I deserved something better."
He nodded, feeling relieved.
For her.
"And you called me?"
He could almost feel her smile, mildly exasperated with his deliberate obtuseness.
"Well, I decided to be by myself for a while first. Figure out what I wanted, who I am. Be comfortable in my own skin again."
He nodded.
Wise idea.
"And now that you've done that . . ."
He let the question hang so she could pick up the thread for herself.
Which she did.
Without too much hesitation, he noted.
"Yeah . . . I wanted . . . I wanted . . . I wanted to see if you wanted to catch up over hotel graffiti."
He chuckled, a big grin up out of his full beard.
"That sounds great," he replied honestly. " I'd love that."
And he couldn't help himself.
"So should we start at the beginning with a lost purse or skip ahead a little?"
The eyeroll through the phone was evident.
But her breathy laugh was musical.
"No, we can skip that. But you are heading for another punch to the nose."
He backed down, enjoying the easy banter and familiarity developed over a single long night.
"Alright. How about coffee?"
"Coffee's good."
He never gave a thought to sounding too eager.
"When?"
"How about now?"
Apparently neither did she.
He grinned wider.
"Oh, okay. Where?"
"Here."
That was unexpected.
Her voice, clearly enjoying his puzzlement, paused, then gave him the direction he needed..
"Turn around, Nick."
He did.
And there she was.
She was beautiful.
Blonde waves framing a lovely, oval face subtle makeup enhanced, not covered.
Blue eyes with little smiling crinkles in the corners.
Perfect teeth in a curved, wide mouth that still managed to be delicate.
He couldn't really pay attention to the rest of her, notice her clothing.
Though he was sure it was something stylish and modest and complimentary of the perfect, inviting body he'd embraced once for a few brief seconds.
All he could see was her face, now happy and free of the stifling stress and restrained anguish she had first presented to him.
He grinned, lowering the phone.
She mirrored, head tilted a little to the side and down.
"Hey."
"Hey."
They gazed at each other for several brief eons before he shook his head a little in bemusement.
"What are you doing here?"
She shrugged.
"Jumping."
His grin widened and all he could think to do was hold out his hand to her and speak.
"Alright, let's jump together."
Watched this movie at in the middle of the night and at five in the morning feeding my baby. I thought, 'cute'.
Just like Baby Bear's porridge. Not too hot and not too cold.
I did say it was the middle of the night. ;)
And I know, I know, the ending is completely up for interpretation. So here's mine anyway.
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