A/N : So.. this is my first fanfic ever. but I love Castle so I decided to give it a try, specially since next castle ep doesn't air till Feb. So this one is completely my imagination but I wanted to see how things would go if Castle had saved Kate from the sniper bullet. Post season 3 ending.

Bleep… Bleep… Bleep… the machine reassured every second as she stared up at the ceiling, blinking at first as she tried hard to remember. It hit her in painstaking flashes… The funeral.. Captain Montgomery.. Mom.. Ryan and Esposito's sad faces as she spoke about her Captain. .. her Captain… Roy Montgomery.. The 3rd Dirty Cop. …. The one who had died… protecting her.

Protecting… That word was hitting her, and no it wasn't only Montgomery, it was much worse, but for some reason she couldn't remember…

She inhaled slowly, to try clear her mind with some air… thats when she felt it… the pain… this one wasn't emotional… it was physical pain that shot up when she tried to emphasize on her breathing… Pain.. she was missing something.. something she couldn't quite fit together.. something she couldn't remember.. she shut her eyes taking in the pain both mental and emotional… though it felt like minutes, she knew it had been hours when her eyes fluttered open again, but it made her feel no better, the pain was a constant, so was the cloudiness in her brain, which was holding something back, something… someone… someone very important.

"Hey" she felt lips against her head … lips… his lips.. so full… the way they came up with that megawatt smile… his.. she blinked to look up to the person who had just kissed her head, and was almost disappointed, no this wasn't him…. these lips were too long and thin to be his.. they didn't hold the ability to give that megawatt smile.. they didn't hold the ability to make her forget all her pains,…. those lips… the ones she just thought of did… she had only felt them once … no twice… but only once against her lips.. and when she had.. didn't want to let them go..

"Hey" the voice repeated again and she looked at the owner of the voice as recognition slowly dawned her way.. it was Josh, her boyfriend who had just kissed her head. But, why didn't she like it when he did that? why was she with a man who was not capable of making her forget all her pains, when the one who was capable had been waiting for her all this while..

She shut her eyes again… who's lips were they.. and then the images flooded her again… his hair.. his eyebrows… how they waggled and made her laugh… his large deep blue eyes, his antics.. the way his voice made something deep in her flutter and roll.. how it made her skin tingle in the good way.. the way she had imagined his body would feel against hers.. the way she thought they would fit like they were meant to be together… who was this man.. and if this man was around then why was she with Josh? someone she didn't care about…

Why was it that she was sitting with a bullet hole so close to her heart and all she could think about was him.. He had saved her.. realization came again.. he had taken a bullet… no, he had taken bullets for her… 2.. 3.. one had torn through him to meet her halfway in…

Who was he? and thats when his entire picture came in… it was him..

"CASTLE!"

She screamed out loud as she sprung up forgetting all the pains in her, her eyes wide open not even blinking as tears streamed down her cheeks.. it took her time… a lot of time.. before she noticed Josh was sitting next to her… but he looked more… weathered than last time.. he had a bit of a stubble like he hadn't shaved for days and his hair was growing wild.. but she didn't care, where was her Castle?

At the cue of her words he sprung up and she instantly identified what his eyes conveyed, Hurt, Jealousy, Anger. But, she still didn't care. All she wanted to know was where was the man she was so deeply in love with ? Where was the man who had stepped in front of her and taken the bullets shot and aimed at her ? Where was the man who saved her life? Was he dead? Tears welled up in her eyes. Three years, they had spent three years as partners and nothing, not even a dirty bomb or freezing compartment had killed them. How could he die now? that too, to a bullet? She looked up at Josh, seeing his jaw clenched, he was angry but she needed answers. "Where is he ?" she heard a female voice, but it sounded weaker, more burdened, ready to break, it took her a minute before she identified it as hers.

"Dead, I hope" She heard and right in that moment, if she could have she would have taken her gun and emptied it into this man's chest. How dare he. How dare he hope HER CASTLE was dead. Even though she was weak she glared at him and in an instant saw him cower but he wasn't so easy, he stomped out and she heard as his heavy footsteps walked farther and farther. But, she didn't care.

Once again alone, she fell back into a slumber as she let the bleeping machine fill her mind again. But all she could think of were his arms around her. the way he had held her in the freezer. The way he had stepped right in front of her to save her from the bullets.

The way he had been there for her…. Always.

1 Week Later…

She woke up again… this time to her Dad sitting next to her. He had tears in his eyes as he was staring at her. as she opened her eyes she could see he was surprised to see her wake up. She smiled, she couldn't see her in the pain that she felt.

But, who was she fooling? He could see through her… so could Castle. No, she cant think of Castle right now, her dad needs her right now. She looked at him again and whispered weakly "Hi Dad"

Somehow her voice was a much better reassurance to him than her smile. "Hi Katie, slept well?" He ran her hand through her hair the way he would when she was little and was down with cough or fever. Just the simple action would calm her down, reassure her she was safe. But. It wasn't her safety she was so anxious about this time. It was his. What had happened to Castle ?

"Dad" she said after a while. He looked at her, smiling again, just happy she was alive. "Hmm?" She bit her lip, choosing her next few words carefully, "What happened, exactly ?" His smile fell but he nodded. He knew, she would want to know, it had been 2 weeks since the Funeral, 2 weeks since she had been falling in and out of sleep. 2 weeks since she had been shot.

"You were…. shot at…., by a sniper…, Castle, he… he saved you by taking the bullets for you, but the last one tore through him and hit you aswell." By now tears were streaming down the faces of both father and daughter as she bit her lip again while her Dad confirmed her worst fears. No wait, he only said he saved her, he didn't say Rick was dead.. She kept looking at him waiting to continue.

He nodded and continued having memorized it over and over against the past two weeks. He owed it to Castle, the man had saved his little girl, saved his Katie.

"The sniper was experienced, knew what he was doing, but the aim was your heart, not his, not the first bullet atleast, he's taller, his heart would be slightly above yours, it went in, just under his heart. The second one pierced through.. thats the fatal one, and the last one was the one that followed it, thats the one that punctured through him and got to you. But his body had pulled down its effect, made, blunted it, decreased the force."

He had been her Castle, physically. Her Fortress.

He had broken all her walls one by one, but when it came to the bullet, he had become her wall.

She suddenly couldn't think straight as tears and sobs started to break, she didn't care about the pains it caused her, she just wanted him there, with her, next to her, so she could hold him. Nurse him back to health. She looked at her dad again, now blurry as tears flowed down "Where is he?"

"Katie I promise ill let you meet him next week, by then you'll be discharged and on your feet and fine, Josh was amazing with your surgery, the only pain you feel is that of healing right now… meanwhile there were some people who wanted to meet you"

She nodded between tears as she knew Lanie and Esposito and Ryan were probably outside ready to break the door if they had to, but she was shocked when her dad left and instead Alexis came in. What shocked her worse was how crippled and sad the young girl looked. She looked like she hadn't slept or eaten or moved since days, yet when she saw Kate, she smiled, both stayed in their positions looking at the other while they cried silently for Castle's recovery.

After a long while of sobbing, Kate raised her arms to hug the young girl, she knew they never hugged before, but right now, they both needed it. They didn't know when but suddenly they were both in each others arms, sobbing harder than before, releasing all emotions for the man they loved. "Im so sorry Alexis, this is all my fault. I was the target, not him, he had begged me just 2 weeks ago, he had held me and begged me to stop. But I wouldn't now Montgomery's dead, and Rick… he;s almost…" Alexis cut her off mid sentence "No Kate, its no one's fault, if anyone is at fault its that sniper, Ryan and Esposito are out looking for him still. Lanie just went back home 2 hours ago, its 3 am here. And, my dad is a fighter, he will live. I am sure of that." "Yes he is a fighter.. he will live.." Kate repeated almost to herself, as if trying to reassure herself. After a few moments she looked at the girl again as she really hoped, unlike Jim, Alexis would at least fill her on Rick's current situation. "How is he ?" she said and Alexis's head shot up. She looked at the woman on the bed. So different from the Detective Beckett she knew, so different from the Beckett her dad couldn't stop talking about. "He's under induced coma. They are going to wait till his body heals the physical wounds before reducing the drugs, so his body can slowly regain control over functions. They said the procedure could be as quick as a month to as long as a year" at the last part her voice broke as she went into another fit of sobs then ran out. The information was too much for the usually tough detective, she passed out, the last thought on her mind was his last words even as he fell from the bullets

"Live for me Kate, I Love you Kate, Please Live for me".