Disclaimer: I Don't own anybody in this story except thyself; and a couple of Ideas.
This Creation is from last year, and its insane. The People I meantion (Excluding the Anime Characters) are, in fact, quite real. Though all of them are quite insane, moreso than I mention.
Forcast For Homicide
The Main newscaster, Liz was signing off as it happened. A hole was blown into the wall, and the camera crew was slottered before the smoke had cleared. Everyone was rushed out of the main room, and the Newscast ended in terror.
I was sitting at my desk, working on gathering data for the next hour's forcast. My editor, Dark came bursting in the room. "Well, Not to get you angry, but screw doing the Forcast right now. We're not going to be on the air."
I gasped in shock. "Whaat? Did we get replaced?"
"No, someone blew a holw into the main anchor room, and slottered the Camera crew. Poor Liz, Orca One was killed too." He replied.
I sighed with Dismay. "Why hadn't I heard it?" I thought to myself. "Oh Duh? How Could I forget?"
A long, long time ago, my department did something stupid. Instead of buying new computers Like I had asked, Our Department head had saw an Infomertial on these bullet-proof, sound protecting safety-Glass windows. He demanded they be installed, for safety.
Ironically, a few days later, two Rival Gangster Granny gangs broke in and had a shoot out while we were on Air. Boy, we thought that was a mess to clean up after, but it is nothing compared to the murder at hand.
Dark's sigh broke my train of thought. "Enough with the friggen sighing! I'm going to check it out." I said as I opened the door to my office, and headed towards the Main Anchor Room.
While walking down the hall, I noticed something disturbing. The Door to Zelos's Love Dungeons was open.
"Odd," I thought, "That is normally locked with Chains with Chains securing it. I mean, Where in the Hell is the 'Warning' sign?"
I walked away quickly, fearing the deep gurgling sound within.
When I came into the main anchoring room, my sore neck finally popped. The shock had been so great that the stiffness had caused all the sore muscles surrounding my neck to tense, cracking it.
When I thought of Homicide, I thought they had all been shot to death.
That thought, however, had been quickly erased.
The Camera Crew lay in heaps on the floor. Some dismembered limbs were also strewn about, and to my suprise, there were even bite marks on the corpses.
There was just no plausible explaination as to who done it.
A few minutes later, the cops came in to investigate, question, and to sit around eating our doughnuts.
I had just gotten out of my Questioning, when I spotted Kite, our Rookie Caster, being Questioned.
"So, Son, Why were you near the main anchor room when this happened?" The Fat cop said, his girth Jiggling.
"Uhhmm... Master Heather requested I steal Dunkin' Doughnuts from the Guys in Tech. She complained those bastards always give us crap. So, as Rookie Forcaster, It was my job to go steal them." Kite said, rather enthusiastic.
"How can I be so sure you're not lying to me?" He growled, his chubby lips pursing.
"I'll vouch for him." I said, "I did tell him to go steal the Tech crews doughnuts."
The cop coughed. "Well, Thank-you." He Lumbered off.
I chuckled. "Kite, being a Crazy Lunatic will get you extremely far in this place. Got that?" I said.
"Noted." He said.
"Now Repeat." I said.
"Being a Crazy Lunatic will get you extremely far in this place." Kite repeated.
"Good. I still want my Doughnuts by the fifth Newshour, and I don't care that we're not on air!" I shouted and he ran off.
It felt good to be in charge. I saw Liz standing near Mithos, who had apparently flown from his job at Starbucks when he saw the news.
"So, whats going on, Ms. Yggy?" I jeered, and she glared at me.
"Well, I hope you know that our camera crew, including Orca One, died." She said, Sarcastically.
"Oh, well, One wasn't your Favorite anyways." I said, trying to cheer her up.
"Yea, he got the sucky Janitor job." Mithos said, and Liz hugged him.
"Well, see you later, I've got more important nails to paint." I said, and she gave me the oddest look as I tramped off. I heard her mumble, 'Never agian, Heather,' Under her breath.
Well, I took an Alternate route to my office because I couldn't contemplate what had crawlen out of the love dungeons by now, and I was in no mood to figure it out.
There were two figures of Familar Builds standing there, looking through the window of my office as I walked in.
"Well, what sort of Chaos, Mischief, and trouble you need to hide from has possessed you to come here for?" I said, with a hint of tiredness in my voice.
"Well," the shorter, longer haired one of the two said, "We wanted to visit our endearing, loving and Kind friend."
"What do you want this time, Karasu?" I said, sighing.
"Nothing! ... Well What the Hell happened here? We have stock in the 666 Newschannel D.V.D.'s"
I sighed. "Why is everyone so interested in our Homicide?"
"Well, I could sell the information to other News Networks for large sums..." He said.
"Heather!" Dark yelled, rushing into my office agian, "They're going to ship another Camera crew within the hour! Get Ready!"
"Oh My." I said, coughing from behind my hand. "Where from?"
"New Jersey." Dark answered, smirking.
"Oh. Joy." I Mumbled.
...To Be Continued...
Well, I'm sure that Liz Remembers the Original for this. It is a little different from last time, though, but it is still funny!
Yes, the Jersey Camera Man gets a bigger part, atleast in the next Chapter.
Hoped you liked it, for if you didn't, you'll make it on my wall of Extreme HATRED.
I also made some referances to other stories like -Wings 510-'s Starbucks: The Coffee of Life., and one of my coming soon, comical Tales of Fanfictions. (Which still needs to be researched, mind you.)
I have alot to draft, so see you in the Future.
...and before I go...
The Orca One thing is an Inside Joke, ask if you want to ger in on it.
...and so we go...