Of Soap and Oatmeal Baths

by Moonlit-Jeannie

Although Kendra was sure that oatmeal baths were probably much worse than the beach. And if what she’d heard on Gilmore Girls almost fifteen years earlier was true, then that was one thing that was totally never going to happen. ::FF for TheBucketWoman::

AN: Okay, here is my flashfic for Cat aka TheBucketWoman. It's finally up... and that's all I can really say. She gave me a simple prompt which was this:

Pick a minor character—Trevor, Sheldon, Max, Noel, Kendra, Sally...whoever. Do a future fic centered around one or more of them. This is an opportunity to make boring characters interesting ::coughMAXcough:: or in the case of Noel, Trevor and Sheldon...interesting (and underused) characters more interesting.

And of course you guys know how much I like Trevor and Kendra. So I decided to make this a fic mainly centered around Kendra with some Trevor in it too. There're also mentions of several other characters from the show and even appearances from Ralph, Derek, Marti, and Dimi. I hope that you guys enjoy this. All I can say is that, no, I was not drunk or high when I wrote this. I am so sorry, Cat. This is just so... I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you somehow, I swear.

Disclaimer: I don't own LWD, any of its characters, or any of the books, movies, TV shows, etc. mentioned in this story. Really, I'd prefer not to even hold claim to this story... unless you think it's good. If you do, then I totally own this story.

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"I asked for four hundred yellow roses. Not four hundred yellow tulips. Andrea, who in their right mind would have yellow tulips at their wedding? Tell me, because I cannot name one single person."

The florist nervously chewed on the tip of her pen and Kendra raised an eyebrow at the action.

"I had yellow tulips at my wedding. They were very cheery."

"Oh, well then. Why don't we keep the yellow tulips just because they're cheery? The bride wanted yellow roses. I wanted yellow roses. Now you are going to get on the phone and call your boss and get the roses, okay? And, we will need them by Friday because the wedding's on Saturday."

"I'll try," Andrea assured her, but Kendra shook her head.

"You won't try. You will do it. You will get those roses or lose one of the best customers that your shop has ever had. Look, if I settled for the 'yellow tulips' every time there was a mix up with a wedding, the bridesmaid dresses for my own wedding would have been eggplant with a puce trim. Puce! Oh, and the flowers would most certainly not have been the white lilies that I wanted and eventually got. That is why when there is something that you want you need to fight for it. You need to fight for what is right! And yellow tulips? They are just wrong, Andrea."

Andrea shook her head, "I really don't think that's what they meant by--"

"You know, you really aren't aggressive enough to be in the career that you're in. It's very cutthroat and you just don't get things done. I won't be very surprised if by next year you've been replaced by someone like my cousin Erika who does nothing but chew gum, count calories, and watch American Idol. My five year old could do your job."

"I really don't think--"

"Oh, I know that you don't, but you should think about that next time you mix up something as different as roses and tulips. Now, if that's all I will be leaving. I have dresses and shoes to pick up and only an hour to do so. Make sure that you have the right flowers by Friday and I'll send someone to pick them up."

Kendra turned on her heel, marched out the door of the shop, and sighed once she was out on the street. She loved her job, planning wedding was her dream and every time she watched someone get married and thought that she had something to do with the event it gave her an amazing feeling, but people were idiots and sometimes there were times when she didn't think that she would get anything at all done in time.

Her cell phone began to emit a familiar tune and she smiled before she pulled it out of her purse and flipped it open.

"Hey, Trevie!" she exclaimed. "How's your day going, hon?" Kendra frowned when she thought about how the clock above the counter had read right before she had left the shop. It had displayed the time as eleven in the morning and Kendra knew that Trevor generally didn't go to lunch until one-thirty if he had the time to go at all, but that was the time that he would always call her during the day. Never before noon. "Is there something wrong?"

"Kendra…" she heard her husband lament, "I'm at work. Can you please cut down on the…?" he left the question open.

"What?" she asked. "Are you embarrassed? Is there someone in the room?" At his silence, she laughed. "There is someone in the room! Is it Greta?" she referenced his older secretary who was in her mid-fifties and a very grandmotherly woman.

"Yes," Trevor sighed. "It's Greta, but Kendra…"

"Put her on the phone, okay? I saw the cutest thing at the store yesterday when I was buying a birthday present for Emma. I think it'd be just perfect for her granddaughter. She's six, right?"

"Seven," he corrected. "Sarah's seven, but Kendra… is there any chance that you could come by the office in, oh, I don't know… the next fifteen minutes?"

Kendra looked up at the street sign at the intersection that she had come to and looked around, "Um… sure. I guess. Why? Did you miss me? Do you want to continue what we started last night?"

"Oh my God!" Kendra could almost hear how red that last comment had made him turn over the phone, "Kendra, can you please not… right now. Lydia's daycare instructor called. She's sick and they think that she has the chicken pox. So they wanted one of us to come get her and I couldn't… and I knew you were busy with the flowers at ten-thirty or so, I'm assuming that you're finished with that now? Anyway, Greta offered to go pick her up and watch her for a little while, but now… I just think she'd be a lot more comfortable at home. Could you come get her? Please?"

Kendra heard the tiredness in his voice and relented, "Sure. I guess I could. I mean… I'm really busy with Sam and Em's wedding. It's on Saturday, but I think I can set the rest of the things up over the phone. All that has to be done is that everyone's dresses and tuxes need to be picked up, but I think I can probably talk Casey into doing that for me. She and Derek don't live that far from the boutique."

Inside, Kendra was frantic. She had a wedding that had to be absolutely perfect in five days and a little girl who was going to be so cranky that Kendra herself would probably by extension be cranky and want to kill anyone who crossed her. Emma, their five year old, had just had the chicken pox the year before, having caught it from Derek and Casey's daughter Catherine, and it had been an absolute nightmare, especially due to the fact that Emma had gotten the chicken pox during June, which was her busiest month with the exception of February and October.

That, unfortunately, was not even the worst of it. The absolute worst of the Chicken Pox Outbreak of 2019, as Kendra had liked to call it, was that somehow, her husband had avoided chicken pox until the age of twenty-nine. All of his brothers and sisters, and she did mean all--there were six of them altogether, had gotten it at some point during their childhood, but not Trevor. He had to wait until their, at the time, four year old daughter, caught it from a friend and came down with it. It took almost three weeks for the house to once again be itch free and until Lydia could come home from her Aunt Mackenzie's house.

Sure, there was many a joke about oatmeal baths after the fact on Kendra's half, but not one of the insinuated baths ever took place. A sick Trevor was a cranky Trevor. He was much, much worse than Emma when he was sick. Although Kendra was sure that oatmeal baths were probably much worse than the beach. And if what she'd heard on Gilmore Girls almost fifteen years earlier was true, then that was one thing that was totally never going to happen, no matter how many great songs there were about it.

When she finally arrived on the floor that Trevor worked on, Meredith, one of the other secretaries, waved and told her that Trevor, Greta, and Lydia were in his office. She walked back to the office, let herself in, and found Trevor sitting at his desk, but not working, with a tired looking Lydia curled up in his lap, one of her hands stuffed in her mouth. He was trying to coax her into taking the hand out of her mouth, but it didn't seem like he was being very successful.

Greta, seeing that Kendra had arrived, got up from the small sofa on the far side of Trevor's office and walked over to her and pulled out a tube of something.

"It's Benadryl," she informed the younger woman, "it's just some that I found in my purse, left over from when Sarah had poison ivy, but it works. Just don't let Lydia over there know about it before she has to, or else she'll be hiding from you as soon as you get home. Little kids are funny like that when it comes to medicine, even if it's something as simple as Neosporin. Of course that may come from them not being able to trust you after telling them that peroxide won't burn 'that bad'. Just use this and calamine lotion interchangeably and if she gets them in her mouth, which I think she already has, have her swish this and saltwater together."

Kendra nodded, "Thanks Greta. The first place that Emma got them was in her mouth and they were everywhere. I just had her swish saltwater, but that was obviously something that didn't go over too well. I can't wait until she starts losing teeth," she said sarcastically.

Greta laughed, "It's nothing, sweetie, I just hope she feels better soon. And good luck with that wedding! It's on Saturday, right?"

"Yeah, it's my friends' wedding. Sam and Emily. I think you may have met them at Trevor's last birthday party?" Kendra added as a clarification.

The party was definitely something that one could not forget. Trevor had insisted for months that there be no party at all because he hated parties, much less a surprise party, but Kendra could not resist. Well, there was that, and the fact that Derek said that the gang hadn't had a good party since they had all, with the exception of Ralph, settled down. And even though they had all turned thirty that year and any one of them could have the so-called "good party", Kendra allowed Derek, Ralph, Sam, Casey, and Emily to help plan her husband's thirtieth birthday party. Of course that was her first mistake. Her second mistake was not saying no when Ralph suggested the strippers. Instead, she had said that if Emily couldn't have Chippendale dancers for her twenty-sixth birthday party, then Trevor couldn't have strippers for his thirtieth. So not only were there strippers at her husband's party that many of his coworkers, his parents, and his eighty-seven year old grandmother attended, there were Chippendale dancers as well that seemed mainly focused on Emily and who presented her with a card that said "Happy 26th Birthday, Emily!" To say that Sam had been upset would have been an understatement. He spent most of the party in a huff eating birthday cake, and he and Emily had had a fight over what her reaction should have been. It most certainly was not the ogling that had taken place. He also wouldn't talk to Ralph for a whole week until the other man had apologized and had his mom make Sam muffins because he thought it would make him feel better. The only person who didn't seem to be appalled from Trevor's family was Grandma Shirley. She had a great time, despite Trevor's embarrassment and antisocial relapse.

"Emily was the one who the, erm, dancers were there for. Right? And Sam was her fiancé?"

Kendra stifled a laugh and looked at her husband who was looking at her suspiciously. "Right."

"That was a good party," Greta commented and shook her head. "Well, I better get back to work. Tell Trevor that he doesn't have any clients until after noon, so if he wants to take off with you and Lydia for a little while and change before he comes back he can. And also tell him that I'll have Jim come in and clean the desk area and the rest of the room while he's gone."

Greta left the room and Kendra hid the Benadryl in her purse. "Hey, Lyddie!" she greeted her daughter, "how are you feeling, hon?"

The little girl turned her head to look up at her mom and some of her ebony curls fell in her face. Trevor pushed them away and she spoke around the hand in her mouth, "I feel 'kay. Just kinda itchy."

She walked over to Trevor's desk and reached out her arms as he handed Lydia to her across the desk. "Does your throat still hurt, sweetie?" she asked once she had the little girl situated on her hip.

Lydia shook her head enthusiastically, "Nuh uh. I feel better now, just itchy."

"Well, that explains Saturday," muttered to herself. On Saturday, Lydia had refused to get out of bed proclaiming that she was 'too sleepy' and that her throat hurt. She wouldn't even leave her room when her older sister had asked her if she wanted to come outside and play with her and her friends or when Kendra and Trevor had offered to watch cartoons with her or play tea party. "Lyddie?" Kendra prompted her daughter and gently took a hold of her arm. "Will you please take your hand out of your mouth so Mommy can see inside?"

Lydia's eyebrows furrowed together as if she was contemplating whether or not she should do as her mother asked before she finally conceded and removed her hand from her mouth and opened it as wide as she could.

"Oh yeah, you definitely have the chicken pox, honey. Where else does it itch?"

Lydia pouted, "My tummy and my-my neck," she whined.

"Okay, well, we're going to take you home and I'll make sure that you feel better. How does that sound?"

"Sounds good," the three year old said seriously, her gray eyes widening.

"Okay then! Just don't scratch where it itches, okay? I know that you want to, but when we get home I'll give you something that'll make it stop for a little while. Just whatever you do, don't listen to your daddy."

Lydia looked up at her mother solemnly before nodding, "'kay."

Kendra boosted the little girl further up her hip and raised an eyebrow at Trevor, "Are you coming, Trevie? Greta said that she'll hold down the fort until you have your meetings later today and that Jim can clean your office while you're gone."

Trevor looked down at the paperwork on his desk and back up at his wife and daughter before he looked down at his hands which had only minutes earlier been holding his daughter.

"Uh, maybe it'd be best if I showered and changed before coming back."

He wasn't exactly sure how long someone was contagious, that was something that he would have to look up later, but there was no way he was going to risk getting the virus a second time, no matter how small the chances of a second breakout may be.

Kendra smiled, "Good answer, hon. And, Trevie?" she tossed over her shoulder as she walked out of the office with him following behind her. "If you get it again or get the shingles I am so going to have to kick your ass."

"Kendra…" Trevor admonished as he cast a look at their daughter who looked like she was ready to fall asleep.

She looked down at her daughter, "Oh, so Derek and Casey get to be Mr. and Mrs. Potty-Mouth around their kids, but I can't even say one little bad word that my daughter doesn't even hear?"

"Did too hear it," Lydia insisted and blinked up at her mother sleepily. "You said--"

Kendra placed a hand over her daughter's mouth and smiled widely at Trevor when he turned around to face her after having pressed the button to call the elevator. "See? What did I tell you? She didn't hear a thing."

The bell dinged signaling the arrival of the elevator and they walked in once the doors opened. Trevor leaned up against the wall and Kendra leaned down with Lydia in her arms to press the buttons since her daughter couldn't.

"Of course she didn't," Trevor remarked. "And about the whole Derek and Casey thing, I can only remember one time that Derek ever said anything remotely bad in front of one of his kids. Well, that's not exactly true, but it is discounting the innuendos. That was six years ago, though, and Parker was almost two and Casey was pregnant with Catherine. Casey smacked him after saying it and he had a red mark in the shape of her handprint on his arm for a week."

Kendra rolled her eyes, "Yeah, well what about Casey? She says bad things all the time."

Trevor laughed, "Kendra, asinine and damnification are not bad words."

"Well, they sound like they should be bad words," she defended.

The elevator dinged once again before they stepped out of it into the building's foyer and Trevor reached in his pocket to retrieve the keys to his car.

"Of course this is coming from the woman who as a girl named a poor little kitten, Mr.--" he paused and grinned, "well, I think you know what you named him and our daughter definitely doesn't need to know what you named that cat."

Kendra wrinkled her nose and pouted, "Hey! That isn't very nice at all and he liked his name. I can't help it if my mom, the romance novelist, and my dad, the gynecologist, had just sat me down and given me the birds and the bees chat."

"The least they could have done was keep it rated G for you," Trevor pointed out. "Or brush over it with the classic stork or Cabbage Patch story."

"Well, I was six and that was the same day that Ralph had exposed himself in class. I had a lot of questions."

"I'd have just loved to have been witness to the many priceless looks on your neighbors' faces, though," he admitted. "Where did you park your car?"

Kendra looked puzzled for a moment. "I parked it where I generally park it when I go to the flower shop. The parking garage that's two blocks up from it."

Trevor gave her a look, "So you walked? It's, what? Six blocks from here?"

Kendra shook her head, "No. The flower shop is six blocks from here. The parking lot is eight."

"And you walked?"

"Yes," Kendra sighed. "I walked. Can we get past that fact, Trevie? It isn't like it's that unbelievable. Besides, I was on my way to the dress shop before you called. It's just two blocks away from the flower shop and there is no available parking near it. When you called it didn't make any sense to go back to get the car because by the time I went back to get the car it would have just been as many blocks as it would have been to walk to your office."

"Okay, well, my car has the car seat installed anyway. You took yours out of the car to get it cleaned and never put it back. So why don't you just drive my car and drop me off at the parking garage and I'll drive your car home," Trevor reasoned. He groaned, "Then we'll have to take the car seat out of this one and get it cleaned."

Kendra took the keys from her husband and handed their daughter over to him. "Why don't you get her buckled in and sit in the backseat with her? I don't think it happens often, but I vaguely remember there being puking when I had the chicken pox. Of course that was almost twenty-five years ago, but I also remember a certain someone throwing up when they had the chicken pox too."

"Please don't remind me," Trevor complained from his place in the backseat. He was stretched across the length of the seat on all fours, attempting to buckle their daughter in, while not coming in direct contact with her nose, which was slightly runny, or her mouth. "If I contract it again, I give you full permission to kill me."

"Really?" Kendra asked excitedly just as Trevor finished snapping their daughter safely into her car seat and he had collapsed into his own seat in the back. "Seat belt," she reminded him, nodding toward Lydia who was peering at him from her car seat.

"Seat belt, Daddy!" the little girl reminded him and he buckled up his own belt before Kendra pulled out of the parking lot.

"Don't sound so excited, Kendra," he said. "There is still a very good chance that I won't get it again or any form of it at all."

"One can only hope. Seriously, from now on you are getting every vaccine known to man. I will not deal with you sick again. Unless it entails that oatmeal bath."

"Kendra!" Trevor hissed, clearly embarrassed. Kendra laughed and looked into the rearview mirror, fully enjoying the look that had crossed his face. She had to admit, beet red really was his color. "Could we not while… well, right now?"

Kendra shook her head and looked once again into the rearview mirror to get a look at her daughter. "Relax," she told him. "She's asleep. Besides, it isn't like she'd have any clue what I was talking about anyway."

"Yeah, well, you also said that Emma wouldn't know what we were talking about when you went around talking about soap and being extra-clean or whatever that nonsense was," Trevor countered.

"How was I supposed to know that she'd ask Derek if they had the good kind of soap at his and Casey's house and tell them that she needed to stay in the bathtub longer than Catherine did because she had to get extra-clean like Mommy and Daddy did when they took a bath? And he could have also kept his mouth shut instead of explaining the situation to her and then going on to tell Sam and Ralph about everything. I really don't think we've stopped hearing about that since then, and then Emily, Sam, Ralph, and Casey and Derek all got us scented soaps for Christmas last year."

"Well, at least Ralph stopped getting us things from Spencer's. If we got one more leg lamp or t-shirt with a naked woman on it…"

"Did you not see or smell the soap that he got us, Trevie? I'm pretty sure he got it at Spencer's. It was in the shape of--"

"I know what it was in the shape of," Trevor said, effectively interrupting Kendra. "I was trying to look at it from a positive outlook. You did get rid of it, right?"

Kendra nodded, "Of course, I gave it to Grandma Shirley," she told him as she pulled into the parking garage where her car was parked. "She had such a fun time at your birthday party and I thought she could use a little spice in her life."

"She's almost eighty-eight years old!" Trevor exclaimed. "She'd go into cardiac arrest if she had anymore spice in her life than she gets from watching a soap opera. And even those send her into very fervent rants sometimes." He looked at Kendra whose entire body was beginning to shake, "You were kidding, weren't you?"

"Duh. Did you really think I would give your grandma dirty soap? No matter how much of a good time she had with those Chippendale dancers I wouldn't do that… I gave them to Marti."

"And that's better how exactly?"

"Well, Marti's twenty-one," Kendra explained. "She probably has a sex life that doesn't require her to get a physical afterwards to make sure that she won't go into shock or slip into a coma. Therefore, I don't think she'd be all that offended by the soap."

"Okay, I don't really want to think about Marti's sex life, let alone my eighty-seven year old grandma's, Kendra. So thank you for that lovely picture that you painted in my head. One person was six and still making finger paintings when I met them and the other is just… my grandma. And what do you mean she has a sex life that doesn't require a physical? We have a sex life and that soap offended me."

"Oh, so you want to talk about our sex life, now?" Kendra quipped as she pulled into an empty parking space beside her car. She sighed, "Did you not hear the part where I said, and I quote, Marti's twenty-one? She's away at university… that alone should explain what I meant. Besides, the soap offended me too," she shuddered. "Can we just tell Ralph that a gift is no longer necessary for the party?"

"Sure. You do that, and I'll pull all of the stuff that we've accumulated over the last eight years out of the attic and drop it off at a thrift shop," Trevor pulled off his seatbelt and looked over at Lydia who was still sleeping. "I'll meet you at home and I'll just take her out with the car seat. That might be easier, so don't worry about her as soon as you get home, I'll take care of it." He opened the door and moved to get out when he remembered something, "Oh, you still have your keys."

Kendra turned and began to dig through her purse. She had tossed it aside to rest in the passenger seat when she got in, but had forgotten that her keys were still in it. She quickly grabbed the keys from the handbag and unbuckled her seatbelt; she turned around in her seat. "Kiss?" She dropped the keys into Trevor's waiting hand and stole a quick kiss from him before she buckled up again.

"Did you call Casey about the dresses?" Trevor asked as he got out of the car. "And to tell her that Lyddie's sick and not to come by?"

"Shoot! Um… no. But I will. I told Lisa that I would be by to pick up the dresses by one o'clock at the latest."

"Okay, well, call her and I'll see you at home."

Kendra smiled and waved before she turned the key in the ignition and started the car, pulling out of the parking space and heading home. She looked once more in the rearview mirror to ensure that Lydia was still asleep and laughed when she saw the little girl's face pushed up against the side of the seat and drool seeping out of her mouth.

-----

"So the ceremony was nice," Trevor commented once they were seated at their table.

"Yeah," Kendra replied dully, staring into her champagne glass.

"You did a great job, and Emily sure seemed to be happy this morning when you finally showed up with those roses."

"Yeah."

"Kendra?"

"Yeah."

Trevor laughed and placed a hand on her shoulder before shaking her slightly. "Are you okay?"

Kendra stirred, "Oh my gosh! I am so sorry, what did you say, Trevie?"

He shook his head, "Nothing. Are you okay?" Kendra had stayed in Lydia's room the night before. She had promised that she was only going to read her two of her old Serendipity books, but when he woke up at five-thirty that morning, he found the two curled up in Lydia's small bed, and the books forgotten on the floor.

"Yeah, I just didn't get much sleep last night," she told him. "I was up until two in the morning reading to Lyddie. She just wouldn't go to sleep, and when she finally would and I would start to sneak out of the bed, she'd either leech onto me or wake up and want another story. And she wouldn't stop scratching. I tried giving her a bath, I tried the Benadryl and calamine lotion, and I even tried putting oven mitts on her hands." At Trevor's look, she explained, "That's what my parents did to get me to stop. Of course it didn't work. I'd just rub them instead of scratch."

"I could have stayed up with her if you only asked. After all, you put this wedding together and you knew that you were going to have to get up early this morning to track down those roses since they didn't get to the florist in time last night."

Kendra shrugged, "I'm fine. I drank lots of coffee this morning. Oh look!" she exclaimed when she saw a familiar face who had somehow escaped the wedding party. "It's Marti! They must be finished with the pictures, so I'm just going to…" Kendra watched as Marti took the two margaritas from the bartender and rounded the bar before disappearing behind it. She heaved a sigh and mumbled a brief explanation to Trevor before she left their table and walked over to the back of the bar and found Marti sitting on the ground in her bridesmaid dress sipping one of her margaritas.

"Marti. What are you doing?"

Marti shrugged and held her empty glass up to the bartender who took it from her and filled it up. By the time he was finished refilling her glass, she had already moved onto her second one and he set it on the ground beside her. "I'm hiding. Do you have any idea how crazy these people are? And they're all over the age of twenty-six and they're that nuts. And there's not one potentially single guy here."

Kendra raised an eyebrow, "Potentially single?"

"You know what I mean. Broken up, separated, taking a break, I'd even take divorced as long as he wasn't too old. I mean, God. At this rate I'll never get a guy."

Kendra shook her head, "You're twenty-one. And Derek's your older brother, what do you expect?"

Marti slammed the glass down angrily, "See? That's what I mean! Derek's my older brother. So he expects every guy to be like him. And they aren't. I mean, I went out with this guy, well, I can't remember his name right now, but I went out with him last year. He was so nice and he was in my Psych class, but Derek freaked the hell out of him and he took off. Casey's talked to him about it, but it doesn't help. And if I'm not going to meet anyone at a wedding, then where am I going to meet someone?"

Kendra leaned down and moved the glasses away from Marti, handing them up to the bartender that she'd hired. She couldn't remember his name, but she was pretty sure that it was Steve. "Let's get you up from here, Marti, okay?"

Marti shook her head. "And that's another thing! I haven't gone by Marti for five years now. It's Margaret now, yet everyone still insists on calling me Marti. And," she continued her rant after taking a breath, "I've been drinking for three years now legally and even more before then, so can I please have my drinks back?"

"I'll give you back your drink when you stop hiding from your family," Kendra leveled with the girl. "And what's all this about everyone being too old? I though Dimi was an usher. He's your age."

Marti rolled her eyes, "Yeah, he's my age, but he's indisposed at the moment. You know Sam's sister? I was going to leave, but when I went to get my coat I found the two of them going at it in the coat closet. I don't know what kind of deal you got with this place, but you may want to go kick them out or something."

"Wait…" Kendra said, surprised by the revelation. "Sam's sister? But isn't she, like, twenty-seven?"

Marti stood up slowly, afraid of falling in her yellow high heels that had been dyed to match her dress. "No, not that one. I don't think she's interested in the male sex, which is good because if I had anymore competition, I would so not hesitate to resort to fighting. The older one that's almost your age. She's twenty-nine."

Kendra's eyes widened. "Wow. Well, way to go Dimi, I guess? It is sad that I'll have to kick them out in, oh, five minutes. I'll be right back," she said as she settled the younger girl onto an empty stool. "Keep an eye on her for me, will you Steve?"

The bartender nodded and Kendra walked off in search of the coat closet. When she finally found it, she opened the door, walked inside, and pulled the chain for the light. She had been in enough closets, even at a young age, to know how the electrical system in them worked. Once the dense light filled the room, the curly haired blonde, who Kendra realized really was in fact Sam's sister and one of Marti's fellow bridesmaids, jumped up and began to adjust the front of her dress which had either slipped down or had fallen down in the make-out process, she also began to pull at the long skirt of her dress in an attempt to shake out any wrinkles and to look presentable.

Dimi, at least, had the decency to look embarrassed by being caught with his pants down, quite literally, and Kendra laughed, "Hey, Dimi. How are you doing down there?"

Dimi looked down at himself and hurriedly pulled his pants up over his boxers, "Kendra, I can explain… I was just looking for my coat. I have some homework that I have to…"

"Dimi, calm down. It's fine. It's just that the party is out there," she hiked her thumb over her shoulder, "and you guys are in here. Don't you think you should go out there and join your sister?" Kendra looked over at Sam's sister and raised an eyebrow, "And your brother?"

"We'll be out in a minute," Sam's sister told Kendra, speaking up for the first time since Kendra had walked in on them; she was looking at Kendra as if daring her to challenge her and Kendra shrugged.

"I'll wait until you're finished."

She huffed and once again straightened her dress before she stomped out of the closet. Kendra raised and eyebrow and shook her head. This girl was practically her age? She acted more like Marti on a bad day when Kendra was still dating Derek.

"Why don't you go on out there and find your family, Dimi?" Kendra suggested and the boy nodded before he ran from the closet to find them.

After Kendra finished cleaning up the mess that Dimi and his cohort had made in the closet, something that unfortunately had to be done if she ever wanted to be able to book the hall for another wedding, she went back to the bar in search of Marti to find her talking to a familiar figure.

"So, I really like your shoes. They are, like, seriously nice. Are those the kind that you dye to match? Because I noticed that your dress is yellow and your shoes are yellow."

Kendra groaned, "Oh God, Ralph…" She hated to be witness to Derek's reaction of one of his best friends hitting on his little sister and actually using a line as lame as 'nice shoes'.

"Ralph!" a voice called from behind her and she turned around. She was about to find out. "Ralph, buddy, what do you think you're doing hitting on my sister?"

All color from Ralph's face drained away and Kendra couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. It wasn't his fault that Marti went away to university and had practically turned into a different person. "Your sister?" he gulped. "But isn't Lizzie with Cas--oh God, this is Marti? Dude, you're Marti? You are Derek's little sister… dude."

Marti smiled tightly with eyebrows raised. "I know." She turned to Derek and glared, "And why don't you just butt out? I can talk to whoever I want to talk to."

"Not Ralph!" Derek stuttered. "You can't talk to any of my friends… not like that! And dressed like that… and are you drunk?"

"It's, uh, okay Marti. Like, I'll just go find Sam. We're supposed to play a song in a sec anyway, right, D?" he looked over at Kendra as if noticing her for the first time. "Hey, Ken, how you liking those soaps that I got you and the husband?" he asked and winked covertly. Well, as covertly as Ralph could wink.

Kendra shook her head and sighed. They were never going to live that down. She walked back to the table that she and Trevor shared with a few people who she assumed were from Sam's family and left the scene between Ralph and Derek behind.

When she finally sat down and was able to return her focus to her champagne glass she found Trevor staring, stunned, at the stage that had been set up for the band and later a performance by Derek, Ralph, and Sam.

"Who invited Sheldon?"

"Oh God," Kendra uttered again. She was fairly sure that she wouldn't be able to get much sleep that night either.