Evanescence: (noun) 1. The act or state of vanishing away; disappearance; the event of fading and gradually vanishing from sight

2. An American alternative rock band founded in Little Rock, Arkansas in 1998 by singer Amy Lee and former guitarist Ben Moody.

Feels like the weight of the world,

Like God in heaven gave me a turn.

Hikaru walked down the empty hallways of the school, listening to the quiet murmurs of the classrooms. He debated weather or not he should go to his. 'Not that I could concentrate on anything.' he thought briefly and kept walking. He didn't really pay attention to where he was going, or even what time it was. Rrrriiiiinnnnnnggg!! Hikaru jumped when the bell snapped him out of his daze. He looked at his watch only to realize that it was lunch time. 'Great.' he thought sarcastically. Students poured themselves out of the classrooms, only to start crowding him when they realized he was there. He felt both his arms being taken hostage from some of his fan girls. They had tears in their eyes as they clung to the savior of the broken brotherly love duo.

Don't cling to me, I swear I can't fix you

"Let go." Hikaru growled, making the girls flinch. He pulled himself out of their grip adn ran out of the crowd. He knew showing up was a mistake. All he kept getting was looks pity from people who thought they understood him, but they didn't. No one understood! How could they? What he and Kaoru had was special, a bond that was not like any other. No one could understand what it was like to lose their other self. Their better self. They were all blind if they thought they could be of any help to him.

Still in the dark, can you fix me?

Freefall, freefall, all through life

Hikaru ran. He didn't know where he was going. He didn't care. He just had to get away. Away from all the stares, the murmurs. Away from the people who thought they were helping him but in reality, were only helping themselves. 'Hikaru!!" cried some of his distraught fan girls as he turned a corner and ran into them. They clung into him immediately and started to cry. "It's alright Hikaru!" one of them said. "You don't have to be alone any longer Hikaru!" "That's right, we love you! And we're here for you!"

"Let go of me!" he said trying to get out of their grasp. He couldn't handle their fake love right at the moment.

"But Hikaru you need to open up!" "Kaoru wouldn't want you to grieve forever!" "That's right! He'd want you to go back to who you were before the accident!" Hikaru glared at them all. He couldn't take this.

"I said let me go!!" He yelled louder and pulled one arm free.

If you love me, then let go of me.

I won't be held down by who I used to be.

She's nothing to me.

He pulled his other arm out and started running. So what is he changed? If they loved him like they claimed to have, it wouldn't matter if he wasn't the same sadistic, prankster he once was. No, they were nothing but shameless fan girls who couldn't handle that their fairy tale was coming undone, and he didn't want to be around them anymore. Hikaru stopped running and started to walk. His shoulders felt heavy causing him to slouch. He could still hear his fan girls running, calling out for him, trying to find him. 'Apparently those stupid girls don't know how to listen.' he thought angry.

Feels like the weight of the world,

Like all my screaming has gone unheard.

He walked through a door only to blink in realization that he walked into the Third Music Room. 'How long has it been since I was last in here?' he wondered briefly as he walked around the room. Flashes of memories coming to mind. He remembered the day after Kaoru's funeral, how he came up to the Host Club and told them he was quitting. They all had looked at him as if waiting for him to smile brightly and say: Just kidding! They didn't take his words seriously.

And oh, I know you don't believe in me.

Safe in the dark, how can you see?

Freefall, freefall, all through life.

Hikaru was lost in his own thought, that he didn't hear the door open. He didn't hear the small quiet foot steps that walked towards him. But he did feel the small slender hands that took his. "Leave me alone." he said quietly not looking to who it was that was holding him.

If you love me, then let go of me.

I won't be held down by who I used to be

The hand tightened it's grip and for a moment, he thought it might have been Kaoru. He opened his eyes and turned his head to look.

If you love me, then let go of me

I won't be held down by who I was

But he was wrong. It wasn't Kaoru. Before him with a determind look on their face, was none other than the one person he didn't want to see more than anyone. Because seeing them was just as painful as the fact that Kaoru was dead. Before him was most likely the only person who could bring the old him back, but he wouldn't allow it.

If you love me, then let go of me

I won't be held down by who I used to be

"No Hikaru. I can't do that." Haruhi said as she held tight to his hand.