DISCLAIMER: I don't own Death Note or anything about it.
SUMMARY: Light used the Death Note, so after he dies, he goes to neither Heaven nor Hell, but to… the shinigami world? And he becomes a shinigami himself?
WARNING: Takes place after the last episode of the anime series, so naturally, it would be best to have watched the anime series first.
NOTE: This is my first-ever Death Note fanfic, just for the record.
"The Sparkling Shinigami,"
By Quillian
Thanks to Alara Moonrunner for beta-reading this.
He who fights monsters should look into it that he himself does not become a monster. When you gaze long into the Abyss, the Abyss also gazes back at you. –Friedrich Nietzsche
Consciousness slowly came to him.
Where am I?
The last thing he remembered… was fleeing from Near and the others… he was shot multiple times, yet running away even as he bled from his wounds… he was hiding in a building, lying on a staircase… and then he felt a pain in his chest – a heart attack…
The shinigami must have written down my name!
His name… what was it, again? Oh yes…
Light Yagami.
It all came back to him in a rush, all of his memories from throughout his young life – but especially those pertaining to the Death Note.
But among his last thoughts as he was dying were what would happen to him now. In their first encounter, Ryuk told Light that humans who use the Death Note could go to neither Heaven nor Hell.
But – as Light had occasionally wondered ever since that interesting fact was revealed to him – if humans who used the Death Note could go to neither Heaven nor Hell, then what would ultimately happen to them?
Would they return to the same non-existence as there was before birth? Would they be reincarnated? Or maybe…
Light finally opened his eyes, and had a hard time believing what he saw. All he saw was a gray world, consisting of a darker gray rocky ground and a lighter gray cloudy sky, with a hidden sun behind the clouds turning that particular patch of sky nearly white but not quite.
However, this world – wherever or whatever it was – was not completely devoid of some kind of life. In the distance, he could see some kinds of creatures moving around, and looking closer, he could see that they looked like…
Shinigami.
Then it all hit Light: He was in the shinigami world.
Light was just thinking to himself what he could do about his situation when he heard a familiar voice.
"Hey, Light!"
Light could recognize that gravelly, cackling voice anywhere…
"Ryuk!"
"Wow, look at you – ha ha ha!" Ryuk cackled. "I told you that you would have something to look forward to when you died, didn't I?"
"Yes," Light said slowly. "Yes, Ryuk, you certainly did."
"Got that right," Ryuk affirmed. "Congratulations, Light, you're now a shinigami. Welcome to the shinigami world."
"So now what?" Light demanded, trying to come to terms with his new situation. "Anyone else want to welcome me to this place?"
"Well," Ryuk said slyly as he thoughtfully rubbed his chin, "I don't think any of the other shinigami necessarily want to welcome you here… but there is someone else who would like to pop in for a moment, just to have a few words with you?"
"And who would that be, Ryuk?"
Ryuk then looked up, and if it was possible, his already-wide eyes widened a little more. "I think he's coming, and you're about to find out for yourself, Light…"
There was a flash of light, and a new figure stood before him. It took all of Light's self-control to simply not fall over on the spot.
Light tried to say something, anything at all, but more than once, words simply refused to come out.
Indeed, there was Soichiro Yagami standing in that spot. He was dressed in his ordinary work clothes… but now he was also standing in the middle of a shaft of light, with a few prismatic flecks of color slowly floating around him. In fact, the senior Yagami looked positively alive… even more than alive, if that was possible.
Finally, Light managed to get one word out:
"Father?"
Soichiro Yagami coldly and indifferently regarded Light for a moment… before he smacked Light upside the head.
Maybe it was special powers, maybe it was unique physics at work, but either way, the blow from the former police officer sent Light flying back in a tall arc, and the younger Yagami subsequently landed in an undignified heap some distance away.
As Ryuk cackled hysterically off on the side, Light gingerly pulled himself together and got back up. "Father," he said unsteadily, "why?"
Now Soichiro's stone-hard face twitched a little, and finally, he spoke.
"'Why?'" Soichiro repeated. "'Why,' you ask me? Do you really have no idea why? Have you really forgotten everything I ever taught you, Light?"
The way his own father stressed his name actually made Light wince a little. "Father, please… I thought you would understand…"
"Understand what, Light?" Soichiro countered. "That you were a delusional young man playing God? That you were using what could easily be the most dangerous weapon on Earth?"
Starting to get more angry than upset, Light finally began to make his case against his father.
"Father… I THOUGHT YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND!" Light yelled. He yelled so loudly that he was almost positive his voice could carry all across the bleak terrain of the shinigami world.
"I thought you would understand," Light repeated. "The human world is constantly rotting! I was trying to change the world… rid it of evil, clean up the filth! I thought you would appreciate what I was doing! You were trying to make the world a better place? Well, so was I!"
Soichiro gave an agonizing sigh and shook his head. "You were trying to make the world a better place, Light? Well then, let's go over your methods, shall we?"
But before Light could protest, Soichiro launched into his own argument. "First of all, Light, did you ever consider the fact that since you are – or, should I say, were – only human, you were prone to making mistakes. Aside from the fact that all the crimes of your victims may not have warranted death, did it ever occur to you at any point that you might have killed innocent people?"
Light was about to protest, but even he had to admit that such a thing had never occurred to him before…
"He's got a point, Light," Ryuk suddenly spoke up. "The Death Note wasn't designed to let whoever uses it see if humans were guilty or innocent of any crimes or sins." However, with the way Ryuk said it, it sounded to Light as though the clown-like shinigami was enjoying watching Light get grilled like this by his own father.
"Want to guess how many innocent people you killed with that accursed notebook, Light?" Soichiro said. "Go on. Take a guess."
"Um… one percent?" Light offered.
Soichirio scowled. "Try nearly forty-two percent."
Light nearly choked. "Forty-two percent!?" he yelled in a rather mangled way. "But how is that possible? I killed the criminals as they were reported on the news by the media…"
"The same media which thrives upon sensationalism," Soichiro swiftly pointed out. "Besides, many of your innocent victims were criminals who never got a trial, especially seeing as you killed them before they could receive one! The rest of your innocent victims were those who were accused but murdered by you before they could be arrested, as well as the occasional convicted prisoner who turned out to be innocent… in other words, Light, you relied on the imperfect media and imperfect government and its justice system of the same imperfect world which you wanted to change!"
Put like that, the words really sunk in to Light's head.
"And it wasn't just the guilty or innocent people whom you killed… what about those FBI agents or other government agents? They didn't agree with you, so they had to die? Even when L set that bait for you, making it look as though you killed the true L, who was really just a convict named Lind L. Taylor, it showed you had no qualms about killing any critics. Especially now, in retrospect, you truly scare me, Light… I can hardly believe that you were my own son."
"Father!" Light nearly shrieked. "How could you say such a thing?"
Soichiro swelled up with anger so mightily that one would have been reminded of a bullfrog. "How could you do such things, Light? Killing off such large numbers of people to create your own world… other people have tried such things in the past, Light. They have names… names like Hitler or Stalin or Pol Pot. Your murdering perceived critics and enemies should have been a first crucial hint about your makings, Light, because such tyrants are typically poor when it comes to accepting criticism.
"You know something, Light?" Not waiting for Light to answer that rhetorical question, Soichiro continued, "I may have gone to Heaven for my deeds in life after my death, but after finding out that my own son was Kira, learning everything he had done up to that point, and witnessing everything else which happened since then up till now… with each passing moment, Light, it felt more and more as though I was actually in Hell."
However, just then, something clicked in Light's brain. "Now wait just a moment!" he exclaimed. "You made the deal for the shinigami eyes, so how come you got to go to Heaven? Doesn't that count as using the Death Note?"
Off to the side, Ryuk made what sounded like a murmur of interest. Soichiro calmly explained, "My case was both unique and unprecedented. I may have touched the Death Note, if only to see its shinigami owner, and while I did make the deal for the shinigami eyes, I never actually used the Death Note itself by writing names in it."
Light had to admit, that did make sense. But then something else occurred to him. "Well, how about that FBI agent who was tailing me years ago… Ray Penbar? He actually wrote down names in the Death Note!"
Internally, Soichiro wondered if Light was looking for inconsistencies in the rules of the Death Note, so he could argue for a case of getting out of his predicament as the newest denizen of the shinigami world. "True, he may have used it… but then again, he was tricked into using it – he didn't even know what it was or what it did! In fact, while he wrote down the names of the other FBI agents, he didn't even touch the paper itself – after all, it was neatly placed in those envelopes which you put them into, Light. Well, either way, the higher powers decided that he would not be destined to go to the shinigami world himself, due to his own unique and unprecedented circumstances."
Light's anger suddenly flared again. "'Unique and unprecedented circumstances!'" he mimicked his father. "Why do you keep saying that?"
Soichiro gave him another gaze, just as cold and hard as stone. "Because of all your tricks and stunts which you've pulled over the past several years, Light, there have been many new things which the other shinigami had to go over. In fact, I even hear they might be coming out with a few new and revised rules, thanks to you and your history of using the Death Note."
Light was about to ask about Takada and Mikami, but as if he could read his son's mind (Could he? Light wondered), Soichiro added, "Also, don't bother looking for Takada or Mikami in this horrid world. They already went and got themselves turned into dust; Takada killed a thug who was about to assault her parents, while Mikami killed another thug who was about to kill an old friend of his. In both cases, they used the Death Note to extend human lives, and so now, they are completely gone. Oh, and when Misa eventually comes to this world, she will be under very close observation by the other shinigami."
Taking a deep breath, Soichiro collected himself, and decided to say some last words to his fallen son. "Back in the human world, with our government and justice system… the system itself may have been imperfect, but that was because humans themselves are imperfect. However… striving for a better world is a constant, ongoing project. It was a far cry from any of those homework assignments or exams which you worked on and studied for, where you did it and it was done… even if such a perfect world was attained, it would have to be maintained indefinitely after that.
"I could see where you were going with your plans, Light… but unfortunately, I can also see where you went with them. I cannot possibly begin to tell you how disappointed I am in you, to say the very least. I only wish you had made the right choice… for everyone's sake.
"Good-bye, Light. May we not see each other again for a very long time… and may you receive whatever you deserve for your past deeds in life."
And in a brilliant flash of almost unbearable divine light… Soichiro Yagami was gone.
For what felt like an unbearably long time, Light Yagami simply stood there, paralyzed with everything his father had forced him to digest.
Those words about being able to go neither Heaven nor Hell reverberated in Light's mind once again, and unable to look Ryuk in the face because of his own frustration, he looked down at the ground and the rest of his own body… or at least what he thought was the rest of his own body.
"Ryuk," he said slowly, "by any chance would you happen to have mirrors in the shinigami world?"
"Why yes, Light," Ryuk said slyly, "as a matter of fact, we do. In fact, we even have this mirror to show new shinigami what they look like."
The ground cracked beneath them, and a mirror rose out of the ground in front of Light. It was a rather sinister-looking mirror, framed by picked bones and jagged rocks – the reflective surface itself wasn't even a solid rectangle or other normal, conventional shape. But nevertheless, Light could still see his new appearance… as a shinigami.
He wore a complete suit – shirt, jacket, pants, tie, belt… the whole works – which looked as though it had been woven from dust or soft stone. His hands were as black as ash, and the skin on his face and neck was as pale gray as that of Ryuk. His brown hair was disheveled, making him look something like a madman.
But his eyes…
His new eyes were like opals, completely black except for a glittering sparkle of whatever color was deep inside them… like a rather small, bright galaxy inside a rather big, dark universe.
"Wow, aren't you quite the looker?" Ryuk remarked. "For a shinigami, that is."
Light really wasn't pleased with his new non-human appearance… but the way he saw it, things could have been far worse in that regard. Besides, he had been a faceless god-like entity for years, when he had been using the Death Note as a human…
"Oh, and so sparkly, too," Ryuk said in a mock-cute voice, clearly enjoying this. "Sparkle, huh? Maybe we should call you… 'Kira.' Hey, guess what? That's the same name you were going by all these years! What a coincidence, huh?"
"Kira" as being the Japanese way of saying the English word "killer," as well as being the Japanese word meaning "sparkle"… yes, what an interesting coincidence indeed. Not that Light particularly cared about it at the moment…
But it was just as well anyway, because Light Yagami was dead, both literally and figuratively, and now the new shinigami known as "Kira" was in his place instead.
"You may want to sit tight for a little while, Kira," Ryuk said as the special mirror sank back into the barren ground. Extending his own wings, Ryuk continued, "I need to talk to the old man, see whether or not you'll get your own Death Note to use. If you do, then you're all set… but if you don't, well, then I guess you slowly starve to death." Lifting up off the ground, Ryuk cackled and flew off, but not before adding, "See you soon, Kira!"
As Ryuk flew off, Light – no, Kira – settled himself down on what looked like the most comfortable patch of ground he could find, and he thought some more about his grim new reality…
Those who used the Death Note would go to neither Heaven nor Hell… and while this might remotely be like heaven, with a little stretch of one's imagination, this place was now looking more and more like Hell to Kira, formerly Light Yagami, the newest shinigami in their world.
But just as Light began to settle himself in for a long, agonizing wait to see if he would even get his own Death Note at all, a new thought occurred to him.
What if…?
Indeed, Kira was now stuck in the shinigami world, also being a shinigami himself, now subject to the laws of the shinigami world – quite a difference from his previous life, when he was in the human world as just another human, following (and sometimes defying) the laws of the human world. In his new surroundings, he hardly any power… but he was not completely powerless.
In fact, he had at least gained some small measure of his original role: To become the god of a new world. True, he was still just one god among many, and he had no new world of his own… yet.
But what if he could change things here? Somehow eliminate the Shinigami King, as well as every and any other shinigami who stood in his way… and be the one to write or rewrite those cursed rules of how the Death Note worked?
It felt as if Kira's mind was on fire, he was so alive and active with excitement. Yes, that was it! He maybe had a chance after all! Maybe this wasn't truly the end for him after all… just a new beginning! Maybe he didn't just die, but he was reborn as well: Light Yagami the human, reborn as Kira the shinigami! Yes, now that was more like it!
He may have changed so much in physical terms… but his mind had not changed at all.
Unseen by anyone else, a small, evil smile slowly crept across Kira's face.
To all of you out there anywhere – humans, shinigami, or otherwise – who thought you could strip me of all my power and banish me forever, you were wrong, because I most certainly will return some day. I promise you this: I, Kira, will become the god of a new world, were all of humanity will live by my laws and die by my judgment. And next time… you won't stop me.
FIN
A/N: So, what do you think?
I read in that "Fatally Fun Facts" book which goes along with the Death Note series that the name "Kira" doesn't just come from trying to pronounce the English word "killer" in Japanese, but is also the Japanese word meaning "sparkle."
Regarding how nearly forty-two percent of Light's victims were innocent… I was originally aiming for something like fifty percent, but that seemed a little high, so I decided to settle for forty-two percent, since 42 is that special number.
I was thinking about turning Ray Penbar into a shinigami as well, since he was tricked into using Death Note paper to kill those other FBI agents, but I ultimately decided not to. Besides, I had a Heaven-sent Soichiro fulfill the purpose of putting Light in his place (although I originally had the idea of Shinigami-Soichiro smacking Shinigami-Light upside the head, at the very least).
As for Light's new shinigami look, I was thinking of having his image appear to be like some kind of ugly reflection of how he often looked when he was alive, wearing some kind of nice suit for school or work.
I may write such a fic where Shinigami-Kira tries to eliminiate the Shinigami King and any other shinigami who stand in his way, I might not… we'll just have to see what happens.
One final note… I was originally going to post this on January 28 (which has some special significance in the story, if you know what I mean), but I decided to do it sooner. Um… Happy Death Note Day, everyone?
–Quillian
(First posted: January 24, 2008)