Sometimes, Tenzin just couldn't help himself.
He knew that Korra was in no way the same person as his Father. His Father had been a wise, kind man who was so full of laughter that he could turn all but the worst of enemies into friends. Meanwhile, Korra seemed to be skilled at making enemies. It wasn't that she was unlikeable, Tenzin was quite fond of the young Avatar. But she was powerful, brash and hot-headed, something that often got her in trouble.
Avatar Aang had been patient, willing to take his time even when Tenzin had first begun to learn Airbending and was painfully slow with learning new forms and techniques. He had been so proud when Tenzin had finally mastered Airbending and comforted him long into the night after earning his tattoos, his new ink burning his skin and making him cry out. He was always willing to give all but the most irredeemable of people a second chance and even when he decided these people could not be allowed to continue their crimes, he merely took away their bending rather then their lives, as per his upraising with the monks. Every life had been a precious one to him.
His Father had been a saint.
Korra, however... Was not.
At first, he wondered how he would face the girl who now held his Father's soul. The world had just lost Avatar Aang but a few years prior and while Tenzin had begun to heal, when he heard that he was going to meet the newest Avatar it had opened the wound anew. What would she be like? Would she have his Father's eyes? His sense of humor? His wonderful laughter?
No, instead he was introduced to a young Waterbender who wore a scowl and singed his beard with a small fireball when he had laughed in relief at the sight of her.
She was nothing like Aang, and he was glad. Because he knew if she had been, he never would have been able to see her as a student.
Yet, a deeper part of him ached at the revelation. For all of Aang's wisdom and happiness, all of his influence on the world and all that he had sacrificed, he was gone. Just like any other human, Avatar or not, Aang could not escape death.
Then, one night while Tenzin had been visiting his mother and Korra was having a Waterbending lesson, the young girl approached him with her usual scowl but a timidness in her eyes that was so out of place it made the man do a double-take.
"What was Aang like?"
His mouth fell open slightly in surprise at the question. Korra had never truly shown much interest in her previous life and the few times that Avatar Aang had been brought up with her, she seemed to try and change the subject.
She frowned, her forehead crinkling in worry. "I was learning with Katara today and she was teaching me a new technique, but I wound up just splashing it all over myself. So I laughed and Katara did to. But then, I noticed that it looked like she was going to cry. I asked her what was wrong and she said that just then, I reminded her of Aang."
Her frown deepened as she clenched and unclenched her hands, her nerves causing a small nearby puddle to stir, awoken by her emotion. She raised her gaze to Tenzin. "Then she really did start crying. She said she was sorry but she was done for today and she went back into her house. Did I do something wrong?"
Tenzin swallowed the lump in his throat. His Mother was a strong woman, capable of things that most Waterbenders could only dream of. She held an emotional strength that made her an excellent mother and it was rare that he saw her crumble. He still remembered when Aang began to grow ill, still too young to be dying. He explained that the spirits had mentioned to him in the past that his hundred years in the ice burg had kept him youthful and strong, but had drained much from him and would catch up to him sometime.
It did, slowly robbing him of his life.
Katara had fought stubbornly, refusing to believe that she would lose Aang when both of them had their best years ahead of them. Many of the Avatars before him had lived very long lives. Just look at Avatar Roku, just one lifetime before.
They had grown so very old. She and Aang had years and years to come, she had been sure.
Aang had smiled and indulged her, but Tenzin would never forget the night when Aang had summoned him to his room in the dark and asked him to be strong for his siblings and Katara. That his time would soon be coming to join the spirits and he needed to help the new Avatar find their way. Aang had told him how dearly he loved Tenzin and his family. How his life, despite its trials, had been so happy.
Then, the next day, he had died.
And from then on, his Mother was never quite the same. She healed and moved on with her life, throwing herself into helping the new Avatar and caring for her children, but her eyes never again held the same laughter, the same life.
Despite this, it had been years since he had seen her cry.
Breathing deeply to steady himself, he kneeled down to Korra's level, her eyes strangely open and vulnerable. He's never seen the little fireball this insecure. Normally she was filled with confidence, a steady self-assuredness that made her cocky. He often thought she was better suited to be born in the fire nation, even her Firebending was unnaturally skilled for an Avatar born into the water tribe.
"You did nothing wrong, Korra." He comforted, forcing a small smile on his face. "Katara just... Has a lot on her mind. She loved my Father very much and sometimes it makes her sad."
Korra lowered her gaze, kicking out slightly and causing a nearby rock to slide. Her lower lip jutted out slightly and to his shock, tears began to fill her eyes. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry for what?" He asked, flabbergasted.
"I'm nothing like him." She mumbled, tears beginning to fall down her cheeks. "I'm not like Aang at all. I know you all miss him very much and you must have hoped I would be. We have the same soul and he had to die so I could be here... But I'm just Korra..."
Tenzin sat forward, his hand reaching out to lightly touch her cheek, brushing the tears away as a small sob broke past her lips. "Korra, you aren't Aang, we know this. All of the Avatars have been their own individual person. Aang didn't even really like some of his past lives! Did you know that Father used to rant all the time about Avatar Kyoshi? She was nothing like him!"
He took her small hands in his, giving her a gentle smile when she raised her eyes to his. "You are Korra first, and the Avatar second. You are not Aang or Roku or Kyoshi."
She had sniffled, a tiny grin coming to her lips as she timidly stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, a breathy "Thank you," in his ear before she was gone again, back to practice the new move that Katara had been trying to teach her.
Tenzin had meant those words he had said to her so long ago and Korra had never again raised the subject with him. They still fought and argued, sometimes quite hotly and he found himself so frustrated with the girl sometimes that he wished his Fathers sense and patience would come to her, just a little, to make the process easier. But he knew they were two very different people, and Korra knew he knew this. A silent understanding, a trust between them.
But there were times like now, when she learned the very forms that his Father had shown himself all those years ago, when her body moved fluidly and the wind itself was at the control of her fingertips, was when she reminded him so much of his Father that it ached.
It wasn't until she mastered the move Aang himself had created and she had been flying around the room on a ball of wind, laughing so joyfully at finally having done it successfully, that Tenzin needed to excuse himself.
"That's it for today, Korra." He told her tightly, her blue eyes turning to his with confusion. "You've done well."
"Thanks Tenzin." She answered, releasing the air ball and landing nimbly on her feet. "But weren't we going to learn about th-"
"I'm sorry, Korra." He interrupted and she raised an eyebrow at him suspiciously, knowing that he rarely interrupted unless he needed to. "The baby was crying all night and I am quite tired. That's enough for today, you've done extremely well."
"Alright then." She replied slowly. "Get some sleep, I guess and I'll see you tomorrow."
She bowed and he returned it before excusing himself, stepping through the door and taking a moment to steady himself.
It amazed him. All these years of grief and healing, all this time and it still only took a glimpse of something, the particular ring of her laughter, that brought it all rushing back and reminded him so much of Aang. Suddenly, he was sucked back in time to the day Aang died and it hurt so terribly all over again.
He stepped outside, listening to the leaves dancing in the wind and the light breeze caressing his face. He truly did love the air, the way the element moved and provided life to everything around it. It was truly a beautiful thing and he was humbled and proud to be an Airbender. To be a partner to this wondrous element. His Father had always taught him to respect all the elements, but he knew they both held a particular love for air.
He approached the ancient training equipment Aang had pulled from one of the air temples, repaired from Korra's Firebending fiasco. He ran his fingers over the ancient wood, the carvings from his ancestors still beautiful and strong after hundreds of years.
Aang would often speak of the monks and explain what all the symbols and swirls meant. That sad little smile would come to his face, one filled with more grief then true happiness and he would talk of Monk Gyatso and all that he taught Aang. The Monk was someone Aang spoke fondly of during their Airbending lessons, although it never failed to cause the Avatar a pain that never entirely healed. A pain that came from never truly being able to say goodbye.
Tenzin felt a similar pain now. He may have had closure with his Father, even someone who could communicate with him and always held a part of him, but it still filled him with a constant pang. Korra could see him whenever she liked and an unwilling jealousy rose from the thought, but he quickly pushed it down. The Monks would not approve of such thoughts and neither would his Father.
Taking a deep breath to center himself, he moved past them into a small copse of trees into a small clearing, illuminated by the moon. He sat and prepared to meditate, closing his eyes and focusing on the world around him. The cool night air that brushed past his face, the light of the moon on his skin, the steady Earth beneath him, all of it connected. Wonderful. Alive.
"Tenzin, you need to be calm." Aang chided him softly as a very young Tenzin's face turned red from concentration. "Relax."
Tenzin sighed. He wanted nothing more then to please his father and he was failing miserably. "I'm trying."
"I know." Aang answered him, reaching out to place a calming hand on his young sons shoulder. "You are very focused and an excellent Airbender for your age, Tenzin. You should be proud on what you have accomplished and work towards improving at your own pace. There is no shame in needing to work for something, don't beat yourself up."
"I just want you to be proud of me..." Tenzin mumbled, his cheeks reddening in disbelief that he had actually just admitted that out loud.
Aang merely smiled back, his eyes calm and gentle as always. "I am proud of you Tenzin. So very proud."
Tenzin looked up shyly, a small smile on his face. "Really?"
Aang reached out to ruffle the short hair on his sons head affectionately. "Really. Now, how about we take a break and go out for a flight? Appa needs to get out, he's been getting a bit restless."
Tenzin's smile dropped, moving back into an expression of intense concentration. "I need to work on my forms. They're sloppy and I can't become a master Airbender like that!"
He jumped slightly when his father took his hand, those brilliant grey eyes looking at him with love and mischief. No matter how majestic and controlled Aang looked in the public eye, he was still fun-loving and full of life. "Tenzin, there is time for work and time for play. I think we should take a break." He bent down to whisper in his sons conspiratorially, "If you don't take breaks, you turn out like Zuko. Or even worse, Mai! And we don't want that!"
Tenzin giggled a little, nodding in agreement.
They had spent the rest of the day on Appa before finally returning home to an amused Katara and his feuding siblings Kya and Bumi. It was one of his fondest memories and it came to him often.
Though not as often as the memories of Aang's death.
The air began to swirl around him, reacting to his sorrow. He had loved his Father so dearly and yet, there was nothing he could do for him when his time came. He never found a way to heal him, help him through it, he wasn't even actually there when it happened! He could only watch as the man he loved withered away and when it came time to help him through his biggest journey, Tenzin hadn't been there.
He heard the snap of a nearby branches and the sound of leaves whipping through the air, wrought from their perches by the air reacting to his emotions, but as tears rose in his eyes he could not help his sorrow. He breathed deeply, trying to fight back the tears that burned for release and the lump that blocked his throat. Somewhere within the anger and grief, shame welled as well.
He was no longer a teenager, he could control himself better then this. It had been many years since he last lost control of his bending but it seemed to be beyond his control, even if just for a moment, now.
He needed control. He needed calm and collected so he didn't harm anything or anyone he cared about. Bending was wondrous, but also so very dangerous.
Aang had taught him that, too.
"Tenzin!"
Yet the boy continued to rage, absolutely furious. Bumi cowered behind him, beaten black and blue, a stream of blood flowing from a cut above his eye. The ones responsible were the boys that whimpered before Tenzin's fury. The wind snarled violently and one of the bullies lost his footing, shrieking as he tumbled away only to be caught by another rush of air, courtesy of the Avatar himself.
Avatar Aang rushed forward, crushing his son to his chest in a desperate attempt to soothe him.
"Tenzin." He muttered, stroking his hair and restricting Tenzin's hands to soothe his bending, "Bumi is alright, Tenzin. It's okay. Calm down."
Unbidden tears streamed down Tenzin's cheeks, his chest still constricted with fury. "They hit him Dad! They're Earthbenders and they were throwing rocks at him and when I found them, they'd even made him bleed!" He hiccuped, his hands clenching as he watched the boys flee. He struggled against his father. "They need to pay for hurting Bumi! They were attacking him just cause he wasn't a Bender!"
"Tenzin, I need you to breathe." Aang rumbled, speaking soft and slow, calming his son despite the boy not wanting to be calmed. "Breathe. Just like we practiced. You're an Airbender, it's the most natural thing in the world for you. Let the wind calm you."
Slowly, Tenzin did as he was told, tears continuing to stream down his cheeks. He flinched as Bumi placed a hand on his shoulder as well, a gentle touch that seemed out of place from his wild and rambunctious brother. The only non-Bender in their family. A fact that he knew frustrated Bumi greatly. For what good was the non-bending son from the Avatar and a master Waterbender?
Yet despite this, Bumi was a happy soul, one that had just received a beating and was still trying to comfort his brother gifted with Airbending.
Who was he to judge for Bumi what the best course of action was?
He sniffled, finally relaxing into Aang.
"What they did was not right." Aang agreed, sighing deeply. "But you should have come to me."
"B-But..."
"Tenzin, please." Aang whispered, his grip tightening. "I need you to promise to never lose control of your bending. What if you had harmed Bumi? Bending is a beautiful thing, a wonderful gift, but it is something to be treated with respect. It isn't just a tool. It makes up who you are. You are an Airbender and Airbender's are like the wind. Allow your negative energies to flow, like we've practiced."
Tenzin nodded slowly.
"If you're not careful, my son, then you may accidentally cause harm to those you love. I have done this before and I would never wish that on anyone. Learn control, Tenzin, and never allow you to lose yourself."
Finally, slowly, the wind died down and he raised his hands to his temples, rubbing them in an attempt to soothe his frayed nerves. Seeing Korra Airbend like that really had bothered him more then he had thought. A large part of him was pleased that she was doing so well, but the selfish part continued to remind him that it may have been some of Aang's skills coming through to her, skill and wisdom that came with being the Avatar.
From his experiences.
From what he had learned.
He hiccuped awkwardly, trying to keep back a sob, although he couldn't stop the tears that fell down his cheeks.
Breathe, Tenzin. It's the most natural thing for an Airbender. Just breathe.
In.
Out.
Slowly, the tears stopped and he could finally get in a solid breath.
Already, he felt better.
He straightened his clothes and glanced at the destruction to his secluded little area, dissapointed in himself for allowing it to happen.
"He asks about you all the time, you know."
Tenzin jumped, ashamed that Korra of all people had managed to sneak up on him. He hurriedly wiped his cheeks, pretending not to see the sympathy in Korra's eyes and praying she simply thought him tired and distressed, not whimpering like a child.
"Korra, I... Don't know what you're talking about."
"Aang." She replied simply, tilting her head in thought. "Now that I can speak with him, he visits me in my dreams a lot. Almost every night."
Tenzin squashed the jealousy that flared in his chest. Terrible emotions that he had no place to feel. "Oh?"
"Yeah. He never shuts up, really."
Tenzin let out a reluctant chuckle. "My Father does like to talk."
"He's always going on about you, Katara, Bumi, Kya, Lin and people I don't even know." She shrugged her shoulders, "He really loves you guys, I can tell. He gets this look in his eye and it's like he's a little kid, so starry-eyed and happy. I'd never know he's the same guy that I see portraits and statues of. It's crazy. You should hear him go on about your kids!" She frowned, her eyebrows crinkling. "He's told me not to tell you before, but he really regrets not being around when they were born. He loves them a lot though."
"They would have loved him." Tenzin answered simply, trying to keep his raging emotions in check.
"Oh yeah, he would have spoiled them rotten!" She laughed, "He's a lot of fun, he would have been a great Grandfather to them. But although he's not here, he still sees them. Watches them grow." She paused, before adding, "All of you."
"I..." Tenzin cleared his throat, determined to not give away more of his crazy emotions. "I know."
"He loves you a lot."
Tenzin paused, fidgeting slightly with his robes. "Would... You mind telling him that I love him too?"
Korra seemed slightly taken aback by Tenzin's openness but gave him a smile all the same. "He can hear you for himself, you know."
Tenzin jumped, looking surprised. "A-As in... He's hear right now?"
"Yup."
"Oh dear." The old Airbender sighed. "Not my most shining moment to have this conversation... Despite all that, I try. I just hope you're proud of me..."
"He says, 'I am proud of you, Tenzin. So very proud.'"
The strength of the words, repeated from so many years ago, hit the older man hard. He breathed deeply, willing himself to calm. "I should be going to bed, Korra. I just want to remind you, Father, that you are still the one I look up to above all others and nothing will change that."
He muttered something under his breath, so quiet that Korra could not hear it, but before she could question it he turned and left with only a slight breeze in his wake.
She turned, observing the Avatar in a small, bald form of a 12 year old child. His eyes wide and innocent, filling rapidly with tears that he did not try to hide.
He looked to her, a smile on his face. "Thank you, Korra. That meant more then you can possibly know."
Korra rubbed her hand anxiously, a sheepish smile on her face. "Don't mention it."
Aang bowed to her deeply, a sign of great respect that Korra didn't feel she deserved from one as honored as Aang, before he faded into the night. Korra allowed herself a final deep breath of night air before turning back to head to her room, feeling accomplished in doing something that had brought a moment's peace to two very important people in her life.